The Lonely Hearts Club (18 page)

“How long ago?” Bren asked.

“Quite some time. A few years.”

Bren nodded thoughtfully. “Well, sometimes we’re more ready than we realize to move on, and it takes meeting someone to recognize that.”

Liz studied her, wondering who besides Reilly she was referring to. “And then there’s the little matter of her not wanting children.”

“Deal breaker there,” Candace said nonchalantly.

“Yes,” Liz agreed.

Bren said nothing.

“So,” Candace said, obviously ready to change the subject. “What are we going to do to celebrate your birthday, Bren? You haven’t told us where you want to go yet.”

Bren smiled slowly. “Anywhere I want, right?”

“Sky’s the limit.”

“Okay then. The Blue Diamond.”

Candace gaped, for once without a comeback.

“Bren, sweetie,” Liz said carefully. “The Blue Diamond is a strip club.”

“I know.”

“Comfortable?” Dr. Marta Thompson asked.

“Oh, absolutely.” Liz tried not to grit her teeth. “Of course, I’m about to wet my pants. If I were wearing any.”

“She’s grumpy this morning,” Candace said, perched on a stool by Liz’s side.

“I’m not grumpy,” Liz grumped.

Marta laughed. “You’re allowed. This won’t take very long, and then you’ll be able to get rid of all that water in your bladder.”

“How about all the water in my feet,” Liz complained.

“How much swelling are we talking about?” Marta walked to the end of the examination table and pushed back the sheets. She pressed her thumb into Liz’s ankle. “I don’t see much right now.”

“Usually by the end of the day my shoes feel tight.”

“But not in the morning?”

“No.”

“It’s normal to have a little swelling in your legs after you’ve been active all day, particularly with the kind of heat we’ve been having. Try to prop them up whenever you can.”

“Oh, that’ll be easy,” Liz muttered, “when I’m in court all day or meeting with doctors and hospital administrators.”

“Liz, honey,” Candace murmured, leaning close to Liz’s ear, “you’re going from grumpy to bitchy.”

Liz glowered. “Just wait until you’re in this situation someday and see how much sympathy you get from me.”

Candace laughed, looking horrified. “Oh no. Never.”

The doctor smiled and exposed Liz’s abdomen, neatly folding the sheet across her pelvis. “Are you two ready to get a look at the baby?”

Liz nodded, suddenly anxious, and reached for Candace’s hand.

“Don’t worry,” Candace whispered. “This is going to be wonderful.”

The doctor adjusted the fetal monitor so Liz and Candace could hear the heartbeat as she moved the ultrasound probe over Liz’s uterus.

“It’s beating so fast,” Liz murmured.

“Fast is good,” Marta assured her. “Right now it’s around 150 beats a minute. Ah, here we are.” She pointed to the screen, her fingertips circling over an amorphous white blob about two inches long. “That’s the fetus.”

Liz stared, her chest tightening. It was so small, this foreign thing growing inside her. It didn’t look like anything. It could almost be a trick of the imagination. But seeing it, knowing it was there—a part of her, made her feel protective. “Can you tell anything about it?”

What she wanted to ask was
Can you tell if there’s anything wrong with it?

“Can you tell if we’re having a girl or a boy?” Candace asked.

Liz smiled, despite the flash of sadness that this was not happening the way she had imagined.

“It’s a bit early to determine sex,” the doctor said, “although with this equipment we often get good enough resolution to do it. I’m actually looking at something called fetal nuchal translucency, which is a developmental sign that things are going along okay so far.”

“And?” Liz asked.

“Everything I’ve seen looks great. I don’t see a penis, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t one. And twelve weeks is just a little bit too soon to base sex on the three line sign.”

“Three lines?” Candace asked.

Marta put the probe away and covered Liz’s abdomen. “The labia will show up as three parallel lines. By sixteen to twenty weeks, I’ll feel very comfortable calling the sex if I see that or the penis.”

“But everything is all right so far?” Liz repeated.

“Everything is fine. Do you want a picture?”

“Two,” Liz said, her voice catching. “I want to send one to Andi—my sister.”

“You got it. After you get dressed, stop by my office and we’ll talk about what you can expect between now and the next visit.”

“Thanks.” Liz took the Polaroid prints and sat up on the side of the table. She studied them as Marta left the office. “Andi is going to love this.”

Candace leaned against Liz’s side, one arm around her waist. “That is so cool. I can’t believe your stomach is still so flat with all this going on inside it.”

Liz snorted. “Believe me, it doesn’t feel flat. I’m not even halfway there and I already feel like a water balloon.”

“Well, you don’t look it. You look great.” Candace kissed her cheek. “In fact, you look sexy as all hell.”

Suddenly, Liz was acutely aware of Candace’s breast against her arm, of the softness of her lips, of the subtle exotic scent of her perfume. Candace’s breath was warm against the side of her neck, and the heat streaked down and settled into the pit of her stomach.

“Liz. God, Liz.” Candace’s mouth skimmed the edge of Liz’s ear. “I miss you so much sometimes.”

Body memories surfaced—Candace holding her close in the middle of the night, teasing her awake with her knowing mouth and her clever hands, arching above her with a wild cry of exultation. Liz couldn’t help but respond in the arms of a woman who knew her, a woman who loved her. She’d been inside this woman, and Candace had been inside her—deeper than flesh, but it was her flesh every bit as much as her battered heart that cried out for more. Her nipples tightened and a ripple of excitement pulsed through her sex. She moaned softly.

“Oh yes,” Candace murmured, gripping Liz’s shoulders as her mouth brushed Liz’s.

Liz’s eyes flickered closed as want coiled in her depths, but the image she saw behind her trembling lids was not Candace’s face. She dragged herself free of the hot, lush sea of sensation and tried to focus. Candace’s eyes were a hazy blue, half lost to desire already. Liz eased away, stroking Candace’s cheek.

“Sweetie. No.”

“Why not,” Candace rasped. “You know I love you.”

“I know, but we can’t go back.”

Candace rested her forehead against Liz’s. “God, why not?”

“I don’t know.” Liz laughed shakily. “I can’t be called upon to think deep thoughts right now. I have to pee.”

“Well God.” Candace stepped back, breathing unevenly. “We can’t let a little seduction get in the way of your bathroom break.”

“Are you okay?” Liz averted her eyes from the hard knots of Candace’s nipples tenting her sheer silk blouse. Liz still throbbed in places that she didn’t want to be throbbing, and the thin hospital gown wasn’t much of a barrier. She hadn’t had sex in months, and her body ached more than she could ever remember not just for touch, but for release.

“I can live with being turned on until I can find a fix.” Candace smiled uncertainly. “Are you mad?”

“No,” Liz said instantly. She climbed down from the table and started to dress. “I’m flattered.”

“I’d prefer you were dying to go to bed with me.”

Liz kept her face turned away because she didn’t want Candace to know just how aroused she really was. “Why ruin a beautiful friendship with something as tawdry as sex.”

Candace laughed. “Tawdry. True. But it feels so good when you’re doing it, and we were good. Remember?”

“Nope,” Liz said lightly, buttoning her blouse. “I can’t remember a thing about it.” She turned just as Candace put her hands on her hips with an indignant expression. “But I know I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”

“Oh, I hate it when you do that,” Candace pouted.

“What?”

“Remind me about all the important things in life just when I’m trying to have a little fun.”

Laughing, Liz grabbed Candace’s hand. “Come on, walk me to the bathroom.”

“I guess there’s no chance of making out in the stalls like we used to do in the dorm, huh?”

“Candace.”

“Okay. Okay. I’m zipping.”

*

After Liz finished with the doctor, she and Candace met Bren for their Thursday afternoon lunch.

“I ordered drinks for us when you called,” Bren said as Liz and Candace settled across from her. “So tell me everything.”

“Look at this,” Liz said, passing the Polaroid across the table.

“Oh, will you look at that.” Delighted, Bren beamed at Liz. “It’s wonderful!”

“It’s pretty amazing,” Liz agreed.

“And everything is okay? Right on schedule?”

“Perfect.” Liz was aware of Candace silently downing her martini beside her, but didn’t know how to ease her obvious discomfort. She was still a little shocked at her own response to the unexpected kiss. That seemed to be happening a lot lately, too. First Reilly, now Candace. But even though she’d responded to Candace’s kiss, it seemed now more like just another memory from their past. She didn’t feel the urgent need to repeat it that she’d felt with Reilly, but maybe that was just because kissing Reilly was a new experience. Even as she thought it, she knew she was deluding herself. She’d felt a connection, an intimacy, with Reilly that she hadn’t felt with Julia in years. But it didn’t matter, because she wasn’t going to be kissing Reilly
or
Candace again.

“Liz?” Bren asked, looking puzzled.

“Hmm? Sorry.”

“I was asking about the birthing classes? When do we start?”

“Not until the last trimester. We’ve got a ways to go yet.”

Abruptly, Candace finished her drink and slid from the booth. “I’m sorry, I’ve got to run.” She leaned over and pecked Bren on the cheek. “We’ll pick you up at nine tomorrow night, okay?”

Surprised, Bren nodded. “Okay. Sure. Did you forget about a hot date or something?”

Candace didn’t look in Liz’s direction. “Just something I need to take care of. See you both tomorrow. Then we’ll party!”

Bren stared after her, then looked questioningly to Liz. “Is she okay?”

“She’ll be fine,” Liz said, hoping it was true.

*

Candace made it to the Main Line in twenty minutes. She pulled into the circular drive in front of the elegant brick colonial and jumped from the car. Moving quickly so she wouldn’t have to think about exactly what she was doing, she hurried up the flagstone walk and rapped the brass knocker on the Wedgwood blue door. A minute later, Parker answered.

“Hello,” Parker said leaning against the door and grinning. “Just happen to be in the neighborhood?”

“This is a sympathy call.” Candace took in Parker’s bare feet, blue jeans, and faded blue oxford shirt. She looked good even though her face was badly discolored. Her right eye was open now and she regarded Candace quizzically. “How are you doing?”

Parker held the door open wide. “A lot better right now. Come on in.”

Candace took in the tasteful antique furnishings in the foyer and what she could see of the library and formal sitting room as she followed Parker down the wide hall. Parker turned into a study in the rear and said over her shoulder, “Can I get you something to drink?”

“No, thanks.” Candace paused in the doorway. She hadn’t come to socialize, but she wasn’t selfish enough to risk interfering with Parker’s recovery. “Your face looks better.”

“It is.” Parker turned to study Candace, who looked wired, as if she were high. Parker knew that wasn’t it. She stepped closer and deliberately surveyed the length of Candace’s body. “Something else I can do for you?”

“Maybe there’s something we can do for each other.”

“I’m not at my kissing best.” Parker stepped behind Candace and pulled her against her. She cupped Candace’s breasts and whispered in her ear, “But everything else is working just fine.”

Candace leaned her head back against Parker’s shoulder, swaying as Parker massaged her breasts. “I want you to make me come.”

Parker laughed, wondering who had gotten her so worked up and why they hadn’t taken care of her. Foolish of them. For a second, she resented whoever it was, but then, Candace was here now. She had come to
her
, and at the moment, that was enough. “I think I can take care of that for you.”

“You better,” Candace panted, covering Parker’s hands and squeezing Parker’s fingers around her breasts even harder. “I feel like I’m going to explode if I don’t come soon.”

“Let’s go,” Parker said sharply, grabbing Candace’s hand and spinning her around. She practically dragged her down the hall and up the stairs to her bedroom. Whoever had started this, she was going to finish it. And when she did, Candace wouldn’t be thinking of anyone except her.