The Lonely Heart (16 page)

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THE LONELY HEART K.M. Mahoney 101

“Yeah, so? You got a problem with that?”

“Of course not.” Grady scowled. “But, well, Morris and his bunch do. Have a problem with it, I mean.”

“So what the hell does that have to do with you?”

As soon as the question left his lips, realisation struck Isaiah with about the same force as that earlier fist to his jaw.

“Oh, hell no,” he spat. “You have not been taking beatings for me.”

Grady’s expression said it all.

“Damn it, Grady!” Isaiah’s curse was loud enough to turn heads. He quickly lowered his voice, staring poisonous daggers at his boss. “I can take care of myself. I don’t need you to defend me to those assholes.”

“I didn’t want you to get hurt.” Grady’s voice was far from forceful, the man obviously realising that any argument he made wasn’t going to be enough.

Isaiah stood and dug his wallet out of his back pocket. He threw down some bills, not even interested in finishing off his onion rings. Grady’s confession had killed off the last of his appetite.

“Let’s go,” he said flatly. “I don’t think this is a conversation we want to continue in public.”

“Probably not.”

The whole way back to the ranch, Isaiah kept sneaking glances in his rear view mirror at the truck following him. He didn’t trust Grady not to bolt off for parts unknown. The man had looked nervous as hell when they’d left the restaurant.

Well, that was just too damn bad. Isaiah was determined that they were going to have this whole damn mess out in the open before the night ended. They’d been dancing around too many issues—not the least of which was their mutual attraction—for far too long. Isaiah was fed up and he was going to finally grow a set and do something about it. Grady was obviously not going to make the first move, so it was up to Isaiah.

Isaiah was going to give the man what he wanted, give him the life he deserved, even if it half-killed him—Grady, that was. Isaiah had no doubts that he was going to come through this just fine.

He parked his truck in its usual spot next to the main barn. Grady drove past him and up to the house. The opening of the garage door spilled a stark square of light across the www.total-e-bound.com

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driveway. The yard was quiet and still. Josh must still be hanging out with the guys. Either that or he’d escaped Tommy to hide out with the horses. Either one was fine with Isaiah. He figured his fight might be easier without an audience. Not easy—Grady would see to that, the stubborn bastard—but easier.

Isaiah hopped out of the truck and strode up to the house, shrugging on his coat as he went. He’d stripped it off inside the warm exterior of the truck but the air outside was enough to whip right through his flannel shirt.

He waylaid Grady at the front steps. Grady made as if to walk right past Isaiah, but Isaiah grabbed his arm and swung him around.

“We aren’t done yet,” he said.

“Yes, we are.” Grady’s voice may have been cold, but his eyes weren’t. Maybe it was just Isaiah’s imagination, but it seemed like Grady was pleading with him, eyes dark with desperation. It seemed to Isaiah that the man was stuck in a prison of his own making. He figured it was up to him to find the key to that big-assed lock.

“No, we aren’t,” Isaiah countered. “You haven’t told me yet why the hell you’ve been heading off to Edmonton, knowing you’re going to get your ass kicked, without telling anyone or asking for any help. You don’t have to go there and—”

“Yes, I do,” Grady shouted. Isaiah would have felt more satisfaction at breaking the dam if Grady hadn’t looked quite so tormented. “I don’t want you to leave.”

“Why the hell would I leave?” Isaiah asked, floundering about in complete confusion.

Damn conversation was worse than a minefield. He never knew when he was going to trigger the next explosion.

Grady clamped his mouth shut.

“You don’t get to make a claim like that and then not explain,” Isaiah said, starting to get pissed off. Or, if truth were told, more pissed off. After this conversation, he might just have to go pick another fight to relieve his stress. Tommy was usually good for it, although the man packed a wallop that would leave his ears ringing for days.

Of course, Isaiah could think of another marvellous way to release stress, but his chances for dragging Grady into bed for some bone-melting sex weren’t looking good.

“Look,” Grady said. “As long as they have a target, they’re happy. Don’t care too much who it is, either. If I keep them occupied, they won’t spread the word around town, about your orientation.”

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Like he gave a shit about that. Everyone already knew.

“And yours?” Isaiah pointed out.

Grady didn’t confirm it, but then he didn’t deny it, either. Not like he needed to, in any case. Isaiah had known the man swung his way from the very first. He’d been looking carefully for proof and had found it in Grady’s utter lack of interest in any female around.

Even the pretty and overly willing ones.

“I didn’t want word to get out,” Grady insisted. “It wouldn’t go over very well around here.”

“Everybody already knows!”

“No, they suspect. It’s different to
know.
”

“You’re not making any sense. Besides, it works fine for Marcy and Lilith,” Isaiah pointed out.

“But they’re girls,” Grady countered. “And they live in Barton.”

“Don’t know what their gender has to do with anything, and we can just start doing our shopping in Barton,” Isaiah snapped. “I can’t see how you putting yourself into the line of fire every few weeks helps the situation.”

“I had to protect you,” Grady insisted.

Oh, the man’s mind just made no sense whatsoever.

“I don’t get you,” Isaiah nearly growled in an echo of his thoughts.

“Yeah, well, join the club.”

“You’re being ridiculous!” Isaiah shouted. “What the hell do you want from me?”

Instead of answering, Grady lunged. He grabbed the back of Isaiah’s head, tangling his fingers tightly in Isaiah’s hair, as he crushed their mouths together. Isaiah froze in pure shock for a split second before instinct took over and he tilted his head, sucking Grady’s tongue into his mouth. He wrapped his hands around those broad shoulders, pulling Grady’s shorter, stockier body into his. They moaned together as the kiss burned hotter. Grady couldn’t seem to pull his hands loose, although he kept tugging at the short strands of hair in his grasp. Isaiah ran his palms over the sleek muscles of Grady’s back, down to his waist, caressing the skin above his ass through the thin cotton of his T-shirt.

Damn. Kissing Grady was everything he’d ever imagined and more. The man radiated heat like a wood stove, his mouth burning around Isaiah’s tongue as Grady sucked and inspected. A deep groan rumbled up from Isaiah’s chest.

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At the sound, Grady yanked back. He stared at Isaiah with wide eyes, his face slowly draining of colour.

“Oh, God,” he whispered. Then he turned tail and ran.

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Isaiah stood, frozen, lost in a haze of lust. It took a second for him to realise that his man was actually running away from him.

“Oh, no, you don’t,” he snarled at the rapidly retreating figure. Unfortunately, it took Isaiah’s body endless seconds to catch up with his brain, and for his throbbing erection to subside enough that he could give chase.

And give chase he did. Isaiah pounded around the side of the house and headed straight for the barns. He knew Grady, knew where the man was going. What the man was thinking? Not so much.

Luck was on Isaiah’s side. Luck, and good friends. As he neared the first corral, Josh paused. He turned, hand still wrapped around the lead rope of his mare, and pointed to the south. Isaiah was halfway through the long aisle of the first stable when Tommy popped his head out of the tack room. For once, the big cowboy didn’t have a ready quip. Like Josh, he just pointed.

By the time Isaiah finally reached the breeding barn, he’d stopped running. Now he was just stomping, irritation, fury, and hurt all vying for precedence. Large equine heads swung towards Isaiah as he entered, already hanging over the top half of their stall doors. All right, then. So someone had recently been here. The large double doors at the far end were tightly sealed and he hadn’t been that far behind Grady. Fresh footprints in the sawdust, not yet covered up by large hooves, disappeared into the gloom.

Isaiah slammed the small side door closed, braced his feet apart, planted his hands on his hips, and threw back his head.

“Grady!” he bellowed. “Get your delectable ass out here right this minute!”

Silence. It grew, rubbing Isaiah’s already rough nerves raw. He was just a hairsbreadth away from really losing his temper with Grady. This whole blasted drama had gone on long enough.

“Grady, you’ve got till the count of three,” he shouted. His words echoed in the mostly empty barn. One of the horses whinnied loudly at him, as if to scold Isaiah for all his noise.

“I’m not a kid,” Grady said softly.

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Isaiah whirled and took a few steps until he could see into a nearby stall. It was one of the ones they used for storage, hay bales stacked along the sides nearly to the ceiling. Grady was sitting in the corner on top of a bale, arms wrapped around his legs. He looked like he was trying to make himself smaller, to melt into the compressed hay that formed his makeshift seat.

Isaiah let out a long breath, releasing most of his anger with it. Grady just looked so miserable huddling there, so unlike himself. His eyes were red, as if he was suppressing tears by sheer force of will. His face was still pale and his hands, where they were clenched around his calves, would probably be shaking if he didn’t have his fingers wound so tightly together.

Isaiah stepped into the stall, blinking to adjust his eyes to the dim light. He ignored the way Grady stiffened and tried to pull even further into himself. Isaiah’s mind raced for the proper words as he dropped down on the hay bale beside Grady.

“I’m sorry,” Grady whispered before Isaiah could speak.

“For what?” Isaiah growled. Yeah, it was a stupid question, but in his defence, his mind wasn’t really working at full speed just yet. His brain was still a good bit away, deep inside that kiss.

“I shouldn’t have kissed you. It was wrong, and I’m sorry, and—”

“Shut up.”

Grady’s mouth closed with an audible snap. Isaiah ran a hand down his face, still trying to find the right words. He’d learnt something lately, something that he would never have imagined a few months ago. Grady was fragile. Not physically, but emotionally. His self-confidence was somewhere down around his boot heels. What Isaiah used to take for reserve, he now realised was a complete cluelessness about social interaction. The man simply didn’t know how to relate to people, or how to get them to relate to him. It hardly helped that Grady had such a low opinion of himself that he always jumped to the worst conclusions.

“I’m not sorry.” Isaiah decided it was past time to quit thinking and just dive in. “I’ve been wanting to do that for years now.”

Grady stared at him, eyes wide in the dusty air.

Isaiah nearly had to sit on his hands to keep from reaching for Grady. “I’m a fool,” he said fervently. When Grady started to protest, Isaiah rode right over him. “No, I am. For too long I’ve been going from one guy to another, never quite sure what it was that I was looking www.total-e-bound.com

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for, and never recognising it was right in front of me. I’ll forever be grateful to Josh for that.

When he came, I started thinking differently. Seeing things differently. It wasn’t just me anymore, it was a family. For the last couple of years it’s been impossible to picture my life without you somewhere around. After Josh, it became impossible to picture us, picture our small family, without you front and centre. Every time something happened, every time I started to panic over suddenly trying to raise a kid, the first thing I wanted to do was run to you. You’re so good with Josh, so clear-headed when I get muddled. We’ve been a team for a long time. But it’s not enough to be a team. I want us to be partners.”

“I don’t see the difference.” Grady’s voice was hoarse with some unnamed emotion.

“I’m not going anywhere. You don’t have to—”

“Would you stop it and
listen
?” Isaiah wanted to howl in frustration. Grady was a good listener, he truly was, but sometimes he just didn’t
hear.
He had this weird world view that skewed everything beyond recognition. It made Isaiah alternately want to smack the man upside the head and squeeze him until they both ran out of breath.

Looking at Grady’s closed-off face, his studiously blank eyes, Isaiah suddenly understood that words weren’t going to work here. He could talk all night, but it wouldn’t make a bit of difference in the end.

So he would have to act. Isaiah shrugged mentally and swallowed down a wicked grin.

That was okay. Action was a hell of a lot more fun than talking, anyway.

Isaiah reached out and yanked Grady forward. Grady yelped, practically falling into Isaiah’s lap. Isaiah kept a tight, almost painful grip on his soon-to-be lover, to keep the man from bolting again.

Then he dived down and sank into the kiss that had been preoccupying his subconscious ever since Grady had touched him earlier.

This time it was Grady who froze. He pushed at Isaiah’s shoulders and struggled a bit.