The India Fan (18 page)

am not sure, but it is certainly one of interest.

Fleur laughed as though she found him amusing.

he will soon be talking,I said. he wants to say something to you, but she just cannot get the words.

he a nice creature.

think so, and so do Polly and Eff.

ff?

hort for Effie.

At the mention of Eff, Fleur began to mumble, ff, Eff Eff.

ou see,I said, he is already beginning to speak.

t did not sound like speech to me.

h, you have to listen carefully. She is saying Eff.

ffeff eff,said Fleur.

hat is her name?he asked.

leur.

little French flower. Is she French?

olly did not say.

ut they gave her a French name.

think she may have had that before she came to them.

I tried to persuade her to relinquish the button, but she refused to do so, and when at length she did her hand shot out and gripped his ear.

he clearly likes you,I said.

wish she would find another way of expressing her fondness.

ome, Fleur,I said. t is time we went home. Polly will be waiting for you and so will Eff. They will be cross if I keep you out too long.

have an idea,he said. ake the baby back and let me give you luncheon.

t is kind of you,I replied, ut I have such a short time left. I must be with Polly.

ecause you will soon be leaving. All right. Wel travel back together.

I did not answer. I put a mildly protesting Fleur back into the pram and turned to him. He stood there hat in hand, bowing.

oodbye,I said.

u revoir, he replied meaningfully.

I did not tell Polly I had met him on the common. I knew it would disturb her.

It was the following morning. Polly and I were breakfasting. Eff took hers very early, which often meant that Polly and I could talk, as we loved to do. I think Eff knew this and was glad to make herself scarce and give us the opportunity.

Polly had been glancing through the paper and she cried as soon as I appeared, ere, what do you think of this?

I sat down expectantly.

here been a big fire at the place that Firs. Nursing home it calls it in the New Forest.

She started to read: irs Nursing Home. Terrible fire, believed to have been started by one of the patients. The fire was well under way before it was discovered. Mrs. Fletcher, the proprietoress, lost her life. It is not yet known how many died, but the fire was very intense and it is feared that several lives were lost. Many of the inmates were suffering some infirmities

I sat staring ahead. Had Janine been one of the victims? I wondered how many women awaiting their babies had perished. I thought of the Duchess and the young man whom Aunt Emily had intended for Janine. I imagined that one day George had lighted one of those fires he had laid so many times in cupboards and such places.

I told Polly about George.

hank goodness it didn happen when you were there,she said.

All that day I could not stop thinking of The Firs and Aunt Emily, Janine and the people I had known.

It might so easily have happened while we were there.

I scoured the papers later that day and all those I could find on the next. I supposed it was not considered of enough interest to be given more than the initial space.

The day for my departure arrived.

An hour before the train was due to leave, Fabian appeared at the door with a cab to take us to the station in time to catch the three olock train. It was the only one that afternoon, so he knew I would be taking it.

Eff opened the door when he knocked. Her surprise was obvious; she was greatly impressed. She liked distinguished people to come to the house. As she said, it went down well with the neighbours.

There was nothing to be done but to accept his offer with a good grace. Polly came with us to the station, but of course his presence prevented intimate conversation between us.

He was very affable to her. When we arrived he insisted that the cabdriver should take her back and he paid for the journey.

Polly said, here no need for that.

But he waved aside her protests and even Polly had to fall in with the arrangement, though she resented it and I knew was disturbed to see me sitting with him in the carriage.

He seemed very pleased with his manoeuvering.

t was a pleasant visit,he said, as we moved out of London.

always enjoy being with them.

most unusual pair of ladies, and there is the baby, too. I could see how much you liked her. A pleasant child. I fancy she looked a little French.

h, did you think so?I forced myself to say.

h yes. And the name Fleur. I don know whether it is used much in France, but it is certainly charming, don you think?

es, I do.

t makes one wonder who could abandon such a child. I should like to know the story behind her birth. A liaison, I imagine with both participants realizing that they had made a mistake.

erhaps.

ost certainly, I would say. Did you hear how those two worthy ladies undertook the adoption?

don know how such things are done.

I looked out of the window.

ou find the view interesting,he said.

he home counties are very pleasant,I replied.

hey are indeed. There is an air of peaceful prosperity about them. Nothing rugged all neat and pleasant. It always seems to me that even the trees submit to conventions. How different from Lindenstein!

I felt sick with apprehension. He had guessed something and he was determined to bait me. He was teasing me as a cat teases a mouse before the final death stroke.

h Lindenstein,I murmured, trying to sound nonchalant.

ather flat, I thought when I saw it. Stark, in fact. Rather surprising when you consider its position. Not quite what one would have expected.

He was trying to trap me. I remembered snatches of that conversation when he had visited us and there had been mention of the mountainous country.

I was growing very uncomfortable under his scrutiny.

I turned from the window and met his gaze. There was a faint amusement in his eyes. Was he telling me that he knew I had never been to Lindenstein? I could see that he was working things out. Lavinia and I had left school at the end of term; we had said we were visiting the Princess; we had been away for two months; and there was a mysterious babyrenchho had been taken in by my devoted nurse.

I imagined he was fitting things together and thinking he had the solution. The inference would seem obvious to him. I felt indignant. I wanted to tell him to stop his insolent probing and ask his sister for the explanation.

I said coldly, suppose everywhere is different from what we expect it to be. Perhaps it is not wise to compare.

dious, aren they comparisons? Or is it odorous?

t depends in which source you are consulting.

hat is true, of course, but in either case it means they are rather obnoxious.

He continued to regard me with amusement. Surely he must consider Lavinia involvement in this. Knowing hers he muste could not believe that she would be ready to make any sacrifice for a friend. If I had been the one who was forced to hide, she would never have gone to such lengths to help me.

I wanted to shout at him, ou Framlings take up such an attitude of superiority when you are the ones who cause all the trouble.

He must have seen that I was shaken, and when he spoke it was rather tenderly. hope there is an improvement in your father health when you return.

hope so. Of course, his duties are considerably lightened by the coming of Colin Brady.

h, the curate. I hear he is quite a success.

hat true, and it is very fortunate that he is there. There are some days when my father is unable to work and that distresses him. But Mr. Brady takes on all the duties and it is a great load off my father shoulders.

suppose he will want a living of his own one day.

e certainly will.

He nodded and again he was giving me that probing look.

daresay you have a great deal in common.

I raised my eyebrows.

oth in Holy Orders, so to speak. You by accident of birth and he by choice.

suppose you could say that.

nd you are obviously good friends.

ne could not be anything else with Mr. Brady. He is so friendly with everyone.

n admirable young man.

Again the almost derisive smile. I was annoyed with him. First he had decided that I had had a liaison in France and that Fleur was the result and now he was contemplating marrying me off to Colin Brady. It was really quite impertinent assuming the role of lord of the manor taking care of the underlings.

I wanted to tell him that I had not sought his company and that I did not care for his assumptions, but of course I did nothing of the sort, and in due course he changed the subject.

He talked about India, a subject which clearly fascinated him, the scenery and the people. He had not yet seen it, he told me, but he was learning so much about it that he felt he was beginning to know it.

I was interested to hear about the people, the caste system, the power of the company, the markets and the exotic goods which could be bought there. I was quite beguiled, but I could not forget our previous conversation, and the implication that Fleur was the result of an indiscretion on my part; and, of course, I could not tell him that it was his sister and not I who was at the centre of that sordid tragedy.

In due course the train steamed into our station. One of the grooms from Framling had brought the carriage and Fabian drove me to the rectory.

He took my hand and smiled at me as he said goodbye. It had been a most interesting and illuminating visit, he told me, with double-edge meaning.

I felt very uneasy, and I could not get out of my mind that thought of the fire at The Firs. I wondered which of the strange people I had known had been its victims. Had Janine been one of them?

Mrs. Janson told me that all had been as well as could be expected at the rectory during my absence. The rector had had one rather bad turn but she hadn thought it necessary to interrupt my holiday. That Mr. Carruthers had been over once or twice and his visits seemed to do the rector a power of good. There they had been, huddled over some old maps and things that Mr. Carruthers brought, and it was like a tonic for the rector. And, of course, Mr. Brady was there to look after everything, so she could say it had all gone off rather well.

During the next week or so my friendship with both Dougal Carruthers and Colin Brady seemed to take a new turn.

Dougal came often and my father was eager for me to join them in their discussions.

ou will find it all so interesting,he said. f course, Mr. Carruthersforte is the Anglo-Saxons a little late for me, but I am finding it all absorbing. He has a good knowledge of early European history, which is very necessary to the period, of course. You will find his conversation quite fascinating.

I was rather surprised that this was so. He brought books for me to read and I was glad of the diversion, for I had been more upset than I had realized by those encounters with Fabian. I could not stop thinking about him and his insinuations. When Lavinia returned I would tell her that she must explain to her brother what my part had been in the adventure.

It was clear that he had pieced things together and come up with what he thought was the right solution. I did not want him to think that first I could have been involved in such a sordid affair and secondly that I should abandon my child even to a trusted nurse. Lavinia would have to explain.

I wished I could stop thinking of Fabian. He intruded constantly into my thoughts. I was not sure of my feelings towards him and sometimes they came close to dislike. I dreaded meeting him, which was always possible as we lived so close to each other; on the other hand, I hoped I would.

He made me feel alive, on the defensive as no other had ever done before. It was rather alarming because of Fleur; on the other hand, our meetings had been an exhilarating experience.

I wished I could stop thinking of the fire at The Firs. Janine was constantly in my mind. What had become of her? She knew where we were, so perhaps she would get in touch. I believed her aunt had amassed a fortune and surely she would have left Janine well provided for. I wished there had been more news in the papers.

My friendship with Dougal was developing and I began to think that he came to the rectory to see me as well as my father.

The interest of probing into the past took hold of me for a time; it was because I needed to keep my mind from dwelling on Fabian and what he might be thinking about mef he gave me another thought. Perhaps it was presumptuous of me to think that he would, but he had seemed deeply interested at the time, which might be because of his sister involvement. Moreover, I had muddled dreams in which The Firs featured. I was back in that half world, surrounded by strange people. I saw George laying his fires and in the middle of the night creeping out and lighting one. I dreamed of waking up, suffocating smoke in my lungs. How dreadful for those poor people caught in such a place!

Colin attitude was changing towards me, too. Church matters brought us together. He would always discuss them with mehat hymns should be chosen for special services, who should have which stall at the annual bazaar, and when the Framlings should be asked when we might make use of their grounds.

I imagined I could see plans forming in Colin mind. It was only natural that they should. He was a young curate in search of promotion. This would seem the perfect parish for him. Parsons needed wives; promotion was easier for them if they had the right one. The rector daughter would be considered highly acceptable, and the likelihood was that, married to me, the living would be his.

I thought, as most girls do, of marriage; but I had learned in the Framling garden that I was plain and I knew that plain girls did not attract husbands as readily as pretty ones. I had told myself that if no one wanted to marry me I did not care. I would be my own mistress and not have to consider the vagaries of any man.