The Heart's Ashes (35 page)

Under the
darkness provided by his drawn black curtains, I saw only his
silhouette look up at me from the edge of the bed. He stood when I
walked in, and stepped away from me. “Get out. I have nothing to
say to you.”

“
Why is your suitcase by the door?” I toed it.

“
Because I’m leaving,” he said, turning to open his drawer.
“I’m packing my things, and as soon as I look human again, I’m out
of this godforsaken place.”

“
Mike, it isn’t that bad.” I closed the door, lowering my
voice. “Emily’s still alive.”

“
Alive?” He spun around quickly, catching me off guard.
“Alive? You call
that
alive?”

“
Yes. It’s not like movies, Mike. Vampires aren’t the undead.
They live, breathe,
feel
. She has a goddamn soul, Mike.
And she can hear
everything
you’re saying.”

“
Good.” He unfolded his arms and shoved past me to grab his
suitcase.

“
Stop that.” I pushed his hand away from it. “Stop
packing.”

“
Ara, go away. I’m warning you.”

“
Or what?” I stood with my hands on my hips, defensive.
“You’ll hurt me, push me, leave? What more can you do, Mike? My
life is ruined, don’t you get it? You can’t make it any worse, and
if you leave, if you go, I won’t recover from that.”

“
See if I care, Ara. I’m done. I can’t take any more of
you.”

A tight heat
choked in the back of my throat. I swallowed hard. “Mike—please.
What about Em? She loves…”

“
What happened to her was unfair. But she’s as good as dead to
me now.” He swiped the air with his hand, then turned back to his
drawer.

“
No. You don’t mean that. I saw how you cried for
her.”

“
I cried for you, too!” He lashed out and grabbed my hand,
shoving it off his arm. “I cried for you when you died. I shoulda
left then. I shoulda gone away and gotten on with my
life.”

“
Mike? Look at me. Mike?” I stepped toward him again. “You
don’t mean that. You’re not yourself, you’re—”

“
I’m tired of you!” He spun around so fast, knocking my touch
from his skin again, that I stumbled back, finding my footing
against the wall in time for him to stomp toward me, grab both arms
in his iron grip and pin me there. “I want you to stay away from
me, Ara. When I leave, when I finally escape this
hell
I’ve been stuck in,
I never want to see you, or your vampire friends, ever again. Do I
make myself clear?”

Stammering
breaths huffed from the back of my throat as I stood under his
grip, my mouth agape.

“
Answer me!” He shook me.

“
Mm-hm.” I nodded, unable to lift my hand to wipe the tear
from my upper lip. His fingers tightened around my arms, almost
twice wrapping, his eyes forcing the message a little deeper. And
for a moment, I thought I saw a twinge of regret wash across his
face, but it was quickly recovered, lost to the seething anger that
transformed my loving friend into a fiend—a seething anger that I
put there.

As he turned
away, I bolted from the room, dodging the extended hand of David as
I passed him in the corridor. There’s no hope now. I have to go. I
have to leave. I have to run.

No one
followed me, no one saw, or no one cared, that I grabbed my keys
and slammed the front door behind me.

The burst of
fresh air and warm, golden sun outside circulated my broken heart,
making me feel silly for crying when everything out here,
everything real, was all right, normal. All those people across the
road, swimming and playing by the lake, had friends, family, had
nothing to ever fear or lose.

I hated them
all. I hated everyone, everything; the birds, the trees, even the
cool breeze. He’s leaving. I squatted down and hid my head in my
arms. I hurt him so bad he’s leaving. Oh God. What will I do
without him? What will Emily do? She loves him. She loves him so
much. This will destroy her worse than being made immortal.

Now, she’ll be
immortal, alone.

I looked up,
feeling closed in, suffocated by all the people around. I needed to
be alone. Somewhere no one would think to look.

I jumped in
the car and, with the wind blowing my tangled hair around my face,
sped down the street, fleeing the confines of my shattered
life.

Leaving my
shoes, my keys and my purse in the car was probably a bad idea, but
the once familiar feeling of home was calling to me, luring me
toward the trees so intensely I never even thought to lock the
doors. I needed to get there, needed to get there fast.

Flipping my
hair off my neck, I let my shoulders breathe the cool, near-autumn
air. Out here, under the shade of the oaks and maples, my heartache
was always easier to bear.

I couldn’t stop him from packing his suitcase, couldn’t make
him stay. And now, I understood how Mum felt when Dad left, how he
zipped up his few belongings into a bag, kissed me on the forehead
and said
I’m sorry,
then walked away and never came back. She had no power stop
him, just like I have no right to stop Mike; he wouldn’t even stay
now if I offered him my heart—offered to be with him after David
left. He was done with me—done with all the pain I caused
him.

The surface of
the lake showed itself; a glimmering entity among plaid browns and
greens. I exhaled, closing my eyes; I’m home.

But when a
loud splash sounded, I stopped dead, gluing myself to the tree line
to watch a man emerge from the water, flipping his jet black hair
from his face, beads of water rising into the air, glistening in
the sun above him.

No one’s ever
been out here before.

I almost felt insulted, like he was trespassing on
my
land. He had no
picnic, that I could see, no friends or boat, only a shirt and a
towel resting in the warmth on
my
rock.

As he swam
toward the sand, I noticed a tattoo circling his upper arm; a band
in black ink. He was young, from what I could tell, hiding all the
way back here in the trees, maybe only as old as David. And quite
possibly very good looking. But that didn’t excuse him from being
in my secret place.

With my arms
folded, I walked with all the intention of throwing his stuff to
the ground and demanding he leave at once. Except, all that slipped
away when I got closer and saw how beautifully toned his arms and
chest were, and how, in the golden daylight, he seemed to look
smooth and oily, like an acrylic painting. Why does being totally
hot make it easier for you to get away with rude behaviour?

No, that’s
even more of a reason why I should ask him to leave.

“
Hey!” I said, meeting him at the edge of the lake, but as our
eyes met, I froze, an instant of recognition passing through me.
“Jason.”

“
Ara?” He stepped up the sandy bank, beads of water gleaming
across his golden flesh in the afternoon sun. “We keep meeting like
this.”

“
I—” I folded my arms, taking a step back. “I thought you were
confined to castle duties?”

He grinned
warmly, drying his hair on the towel, standing shirtless in front
of me. “As far as anyone’s concerned, I’m there right now.”

My throat
tightened. “What are you doing here?” I tried not to sound
reproving, but hadn’t practiced my acting skills today.

“
Well, I’m not stalking you, if that’s what you’re implying.”
He pointed his towel at me. “
You
snuck up on
me
—remember?”

True. For both
times we met recently.

“
And besides, unless you’re actually married into my
family,
you’re
the one trespassing.” He hoisted himself up on the rock and
folded his arms, looking ever so much like David—the boy, the one
from school; carefree and fun-loving David.

“
I know. I’m sorry.” I looked down at my feet, remembering the
fox’s punishment for trespassing. “I just needed to get
away.”

Jason leaped
off the rock, landing beside me with a gentle touch to my cheek;
“Ara? What happened?” His voice was almost soothing enough to make
me want to confide in him.

“
Nothing. I’m fine.” The fold of my arms tightened, but so too
did my brow; Jason studied my face carefully, tracing every inch
with a gaze that also penetrated my thoughts, I could feel
it.

“
You’re not fine.”

I drew a tight
breath through my nose, biting my lip. I will not cry in front of
him. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. “Yes, I am fine. And I’m
not talking to you. So you need to leave.”

“
Me, leave?” He stood back, practically laughing. “I own this
land. I can stay if I wish.”

“
You own
part
of this land.”

“
Yeah,” he said, stepping closer. “This part. So, if you want
to be alone, you’ll have to go over there.” My gaze followed his
arm to the island.

“
Maybe I will then.” I started walking; he grabbed my
wrist.

“
Wait. I’m kidding. Okay, I’m just being playful. You don’t
have to leave.”

“
I don’t plan to. But I need to think, and I can’t do that
around you.”

“
Why?”

“
Because, a; you’ll read my thoughts, and b; you just
destroyed my entire life.”

“
Me?” he said, pointing to his chest. “What have I done this
time?”

Was he trying
to deny hurting Emily, or was he trying to brush it off like it
didn’t matter? “Emily! You ignorant twit. You bit Emily!”

“
Oh. That.” His arms dropped to his sides.

“
Yeah.
That
.”

“
I—” The distant sound of a dog barking drew my tears back in
an instant, stopping Jason from the probable confession. He smiled
instead and looked over my shoulder. “Ara-Rose, I have someone I
want you to meet.”

I spun around
to see a great, white, fluffy canine, bolting toward me—his tongue
hanging out, flying around with his stride. Jason stood beside me,
swung his towel over his shoulder, then squatted down, ruffling the
fur at the dog’s neck. “Petey, this is Ara.”

I squatted
too, entranced by Jason’s obvious kinship with this fluffy
monstrosity, and the kindness he showed, which was obviously
returned. Petey jumped to his feet after a scratch on the belly and
sat looking at me expectantly.

“
He wants you to say hello,” Jason said.

“
Oh, um. I’m sorry. How rude of me.” I extended a hand; the
dog placed his heavy, gristly paw in place. “Pleased to meet you,
Petey.”

The dog
whimpered, huffing heavily, his mouth turned up into what looked
like a smile. His pale-blue eyes seemed almost out of place against
his stark white fur, like transparent windows that showed right
into his warm soul.

“
What kind of dog is he?”

“
Siberian Husky.” Jason stood up. “Do you like
dogs?”

“
I’m more of a cat person,” I said.

Jason turned
back to smile at me. “You never seemed to like Skittles.”

I stood too,
remaining close to Petey. “I affectionately disliked that cat.”

“
Like how you feel about me.”

I huffed;
Petey gave a low groan. “I actually just plain dislike you, no
affection before it.”

Jason looked
at the dog then and nodded. “I know. Told ya.”

“
You know what?” I looked at Petey, too. “Wait, are you
talking to the dog?”

“
He likes you.” Jason dried the remainder of water from his
dark, very messed hair, and dropped the towel on the rock. “He says
my memory does your face no justice.”

“
He can read your mind?”

“
No.” Jason laughed. “I exchange images with him mostly—kind
of give them to him.”

“
Oh.” I smiled at the dog, then looked at Jason, who laughed,
just once—keeping his back to me. “What’s that?” I walked closer to
the vampire, feeling more comfortable, somehow, with Petey
here.

“
What’s what?” Jason turned around, his shirt in
hand.

Without
thinking about who or what I was touching, I rested a fingertip to
the black band; the tattoo, two lines with an unreadable
inscription in the banner. “This.”

Jason looked
up from my gentle touch and threaded his thumbs through his shirt,
stepping away. “It’s uh—” When he looked at Petey, the dog sneezed,
shaking it off, the shiver running all the way down his body. “You
know, you really shouldn’t be out here, Ara. David will be upset
when he finds you were here—alone.”

“
What, how do you know about Da—”

“
I’ve known he was here since before he knew he was
coming.”

“
Then, why haven’t you turned him in?”

He sighed,
almost annoyed, slipping his shirt over his head. “I may hate him,
want to see him suffer, but I won’t take you down with him. If they
come for him...” He left the ending to imagination.

“
So, you won’t tell Arthur?”

“
No. But be aware, our hunters will discover the true identity
of the girl they’re following soon enough. They’re not the smartest
lot, so I’d give it about two months. But, you better let him go
after that, Ara. He won’t leave without your blessing. He
will
stick around, and
he
will
get
caught.”