The Heart-Shaped Emblor (The Ewlishash Series) (10 page)

“So, before I was born,” I began, “I wanted to help people when I got here. That much seems clear.” I struggled for the words. “For instance, when I dreamed of Jaden jumping, I didn’t write it off. Instead, I took a risk and went to her in her time of need. I didn’t consider the possibility that my dream could have been wrong and she might rake me over the coals for butting in. All I knew was that I had to try to stop her. To me, that seems selfless. It also made me happy when things turned out okay. I was glad that I chose to go to her.

“Even today, when I wanted to scream at Cooper, I didn’t. Instead, I let him go. Maybe that’s why I feel so good now. My soul is giving me a heads-up that I’m doing something correct with him, finally.”

“Wow, that’s all very perceptive, Aislinn. See, you don’t need me to tell you everything, just to help get you thinking.”

“There are a couple things I haven’t told you yet.” I sat up straight and cleared my throat. “I think I have an idea about Alexander, about what my soul wanted me to know.” I took a deep breath through my nose. “I told you that he’s the one I’ve been dreaming about for years, correct?”

She nodded.

“Well, what you don’t know yet, is that last night I had another dream. I rushed to campus this morning, even before class started, just so I could tell you about it. I didn’t get the chance, because Cooper saw me first and wanted to talk.

“The dream was the oddest one I’ve ever had. I could feel things in it. Then, when I woke up, I saw Alexander in my room, and he disappeared.” Hope’s face lit up, but not in a good way. She looked unnerved, and it caused my voice to crack. “I’ve never had a dream like that.”

Hope’s eyebrows creased into a straight line.

“What happened when you saw him?” Her voice had an edge to it.

“At first, I panicked. Then he just vanished before I could do anything. I must have been dreaming still; that’s the only possibility. You know… like when you wake up and get ready for class just to have your alarm go off. I do that a lot. This was probably the same type of thing. I just thought I was awake.”

Hope stood up, looking shaken. “Can you excuse me for a minute?”

This was not the reaction I’d been hoping for.

“Sure. I guess. You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.” I tried to lighten her mood by joking, but my jest failed.

“You could say that. I’ll be back in a minute.” She hurried out of the room, tripping on the way out.

I sat on her bed for what seemed like forever. There hadn’t even been time to tell her my theory on why I saw Alexander in my dreams and in real life. I could hear Hope raising her voice at someone down the hall, sounding like she was on the phone. Trying not to pry, I focused on memories of my dream.

When Hope returned, she looked ill.

“Is everything okay, Hope? You’re really pale.”

“I’m fine, just shaken up.” Her voice sounded unsteady.

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing for you to worry about,” she said.

“If it has to do with me, then it is something to worry about. I wanted to tell you my theory about why I dream of him, and ask you something as well, but if there’s a problem, I need to know.”

“I’m just worried, Aislinn. I don’t want to sway your decision. You have already taken what little I told you and run with it. Granted, in a good direction, but I’m not sure it’s what’s best for now. You need to have nudges, not detailed answers. So I can’t share anymore right now, and I may not comment on your theories. Is that okay?” With the amount of tension in her voice, I knew she wasn’t going to budge.

“I guess that will have to do, although the whole point was to get your opinion.” Defeat weighed heavy on my chest.

“Go ahead,” she urged. “I will help if I can.”

“I think the reason I’ve dreamed about him so much is because it was my way of telling myself to pay attention. I think he is supposed to be the one for me, even though I don’t know anything about him. My dreams have been guiding me to him for a good majority of my life. Even from the first moment I saw him on campus, I knew. I recognized him. That has to mean something, considering my other dreams have all come true. Especially after I talked with him this morning.” I shook my head, remembering how confused and yet absolutely comforted I’d been by his presence.

Hope perked up again. “You talked to him this morning?”

She didn’t know? How strange when she seemed to know so much else.

“Twice,” I replied.

“First, I think it’s okay for you to draw your own conclusions about your dreams. I’m here to listen and give you things to think about. I will say that I think you’re onto something with your assessment about Alexander, but I can’t say if I think you are right or wrong, only that you should trust your judgment as much as possible.

“As far as your talking to him this morning, I would love to hear about both times. But, like before, I may not comment.”

I nodded, and began filling her in on everything that transpired in town. She didn’t seem to respond when I told her about his touch being painful, but when I mentioned almost entering the bead store; she clasped her hand over her mouth. I assured her I didn’t go inside, and she relaxed a little.

“Did he tell you anything about the bead shop?”

“Not too much. He told me their last name is Hallygen and that if I went in there, it could be dangerous for me. They might find out who I am before I do. He made me promise not to go in there until I know more about myself. Since his answer made sense, I agreed.”

Hope smirked. “Why didn’t I think of that? I can see now that I’ve taken the wrong tactic with you, Aislinn. You needed a more direct approach. I’m not pleased that Alexander shared with you, since he is technically breaking the rules, yet I can see now that it was what you needed. There’s always a fear that one of us could say too much and send you down the wrong path. If you decided that we were trying to control you, or manipulate you, you might tell us to take a hike. That’s why we must be so careful.”

“Well, at any rate, I finally understand some things about my life. I really do feel that I’m finally heading in the right direction.” Some of the weight on my chest lifted.

“Dinnnner!” A loud trill came from downstairs.

“Just in time. I’m hungry,” I admitted, putting the empty chip bag into my backpack.

“Let’s go eat, then. My family is eager to get to know you better.” Hope’s concern from a few minutes ago seemed to be gone.

By the time we finished dinner, I was ready to go home. Thankfully, the only thing on my to-do list for the following day was picking up my final project for photography. Then, I would be off to Whistler for my annual friend getaway. That held the promise of fun and relaxation.

“Hope, I’m going to head home. I really need to get some packing done.”

“No problem,” she said as she bounced onto her bed, back to her happy-go-lucky self. “I still have to study for a final, and pack myself too. So see you tomorrow?”

I nodded. “Tomorrow. Thanks for everything.”

DILEMMA

“
Evan?” I reached toward him to get his attention, but he didn’t seem to feel me tug on his arm. I looked down, and realized I was floating.

“Evan?”

Still no answer. I watched as an attractive blonde approached. Evan was looking at cookies, picking out several varieties of his guilty pleasure.

The blonde moved closer to him, leaning into Evan, pretending to be looking for something where he stood. He instinctively scooted back, just to have her follow.

She giggled. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to bump into you. You’re new around here, aren’t you?”

Evan looked taken back by her beauty, and he fumbled for words. “I’m just visiting. Annual snowboarding trip.” He kept his reply brief and grabbed his items, then headed back to the hotel, with me following. The blonde trailed behind him.

The moment we reached the hotel, everything went black. I was moving on some sort of supernatural railway, stretching me like elastic. It dropped me in his room, but it appeared to be another day. There was a knock at the door. The blonde waited outside. Evan let her in, and the stranger entered without hesitation. They both sat on the bed, with me still watching. Neither of them knew I could see them. She took off her clothes, and Evan turned away, his eyes lowered to his feet.

“Don’t you want to?” she asked with doe eyes.

“Yes and no. I have a girlfriend.”

“So?”

“I love her. We are on our second go-round and we’re really happy.”

“Then where is she?”

“Couldn’t come.”

“She won’t ever find out. How could she? I don’t even know where you live. I won’t tell anyone.” The young woman’s eyelashes fluttered, causing Evan to scoot toward her. His arms wrapped her in a passionate embrace.

My body jerked, and everything went black again. Wind tore at my hair, spinning me until I felt nauseated. The moment I realized I was traveling again, the spinning ceased. I was home and could hear Mel crying in the bathroom.

“What happened?” I asked, rushing to her side.

“Evan! I think he cheated on me! I just got back from the doctor and I have Chlamydia! The worst part is I’m not sure how long I’ve had it. He’s the only one I’ve been with since my last test. Now, the doctor says it will be difficult to have kids because there’s scar tissue.”

***

I woke shaking violently, my pillow wet with sweat. My heart pounded me like a hammer. If that was going to happen, what should I do about it? What could I do?

After my conversation with Hope, I did not intend to screw with someone’s freewill. If Mel’s soul needed to experience that, then who was I to stand in the way? But what if she didn’t want to experience that? Confusing as things might be, my dream felt more like divine timing than anything else. With some sort of test heading my way, ignoring my dream would not serve anyone.

I avoided going upstairs, not sure how to handle what I’d seen. I managed to evade running into Mel or Evan, and by the time I got to class, my dream had far overshadowed my apprehension of seeing Cooper after our breakup. Dealing with him would be quite easy compared to the conversation I might have to have with my friends.

Thankfully, Cooper came in late, which enabled me to avoid him for most of class. That did not stop him from burning a hole in my back with his eyes, however. I was right in the middle of putting my final photo project in my backpack when Cooper approached quietly from behind me.

“How are you, Aislinn?”

“I’m all right. How ‘bout you?” I tried to be lighthearted, yet reserved.

“Fine, I guess. I feel bad.”

“Don’t,” I said flatly. “We weren’t doing well together. Both of us know that. Plus, both of us had feelings for other people. Just focus on Jaden. She needs you.”

“How could you have moved on so soon?” His eyes opened wider, and his mouth fell open slightly.

“You did. Ask yourself that.” My words were mechanical. I looked at the pictures in my hand, trying harder to soften my resolve. “Look, I’m not meaning to be rude. But you were never into me. We both know it, so you don’t need to feel bad.”

“But I haven’t moved on already. I do love Jaden, but I still care about you too.”

“Why now? You rarely showed affection for me while we were together. I can count on one hand the number of times you complimented me on something. That’s not good, Cooper.” I shook my head, feeling my eyes narrow.

“I know, and now that I see you, I mean truly see you, I wish I could go back and do things differently. You’re so understanding toward Jaden and me.” Cooper let his hand brush mine, but I withdrew. He met my eyes. “Can we at least be friends?”

“Cooper,” I let out an uneven breath, “we can be friends eventually. But I need time.”

“All right,” he sighed, head lowering.

“I have to go.” I threw my backpack over my shoulder. “You have a good vacation.”

“You too.” As I walked out the door, I could feel that Cooper’s eyes didn’t leave me. They didn’t hold the love I had desired, but maybe, one day, they would hold friendship.

The hall was empty. Light peeked in from the high stained-glass windows, casting aquamarine reflections across the floor. Clicks of keyboards and scribbling pencils echoed in my ears as my fellow students hurried to finish their finals. The best thing about focusing on the art side of my degree first was the lack of tests. I set my feet down softly, trying not to disturb anyone.

“Where are you going?” Mel’s whisper came from behind me.

“Oh, hey, Mel. I’m done, so I’m heading home.” I tried to sound convincing.

“Whatever.” The blue lighting cast a cool hue across her face. “You didn’t come upstairs this morning. Even Kyle wondered what was up with you. We thought you were mad at us.”

“I’m sorry, Mel.” I gave her a half-hug. “Cooper and I broke up yesterday and things were kind of awkward in class. I’ve been a bit distracted.”

“You broke up? What happened?” Her words came out like a shriek, and I had to shush her.

In my day full of emotions, surprises and questions, I’d forgotten to tell Mel. Poor Mel. How could I have forgotten her? But I knew already. I got home late, and this morning, I avoided her because of my dream.

“Yes, we broke up. To make a long story short, he cheated with Jaden. But I’m not angry. More relieved, actually, like I have my freedom again. They’re in love, so they should be together. Sorry I didn’t come upstairs this morning; I just needed time. Are you mad?”

Mel cracked a soft smile. “How could I be mad at you? I’m more concerned than anything else. Are you sure you’re okay? What about tonight?”

What
about
tonight? Would Mel be going? Now that Cooper wasn’t going with me, how would I get up there? Did I need to get my own room? There were too many questions and no answers.

I fumbled for words. “I’m still going, but I’m going alone. That’s okay. You don’t need to worry about me. After Cooper told me yesterday, I was upset and needed some time alone, so I headed into town. I ran into this guy named Alexander. We talked until I felt able to return to campus. So, despite the breakup, I’m doing extremely well.”

“Alexander?” Mel’s face flushed pink. “You mean the one working on campus? He’s so- gorgeous. Do you think he’s interested in you?”

“It’s too early to tell.” I felt my cheeks redden as well. “But I think he may be.”

“No way! You’re so lucky!” Mel looked around and quickly lowered her voice.

“There is nothing there yet, Mel. Just a feeling that there could be,” I corrected her.

“That’s so unfair.” Mel shook her head. “How is it you managed to run into Alexander right when you needed someone? Like he is your own personal hero or something.”

“I don’t know, but right now, I need to focus on how I’m getting to Whistler.” I twirled my hair in my fingers.

“I’m sure Evan can take you.” The corner of Mel’s mouth curled up. “My mom has been having terrible morning sickness and needs help while my stepdad is out of town. I’m going to stay with her. Evan will need someone to ride with.”

“You’re not going?” Coldness washed over me.

“No, but that’s okay. You guys will have fun. It’ll be nice to spend some time with my mom. I would have told you this morning, but I didn’t get the chance. I’m heading over to her place as soon as I’m out of class.”

“It won’t be any fun without you, Mel.” The icy feeling spread to my fingers, and I closed my fists to warm them.

“Sure it will.” Mel gave me another hug. “I better get back to class now.”

“Call me if you need anything.” I tried to force a smile, but the knots in my stomach made it difficult.

Mel waved as she headed back to her class.

I tried not to let panic set in as I made my way to the car. There was only one thing to do—follow Evan everywhere he went, even if it meant annoying the heck out of him. It was my only choice. If he wanted to know why, I would tell him about the blonde.

When I got home, I focused my attention on packing all the necessities: toiletries, sweats to sleep in, extra socks, all my snowboarding gear, clothes, and even my swimsuit for the hot tub. The hot tub always held a layer of snow, but that was what made it so fun.

I shoved everything into one big duffel bag and piled my board and boots next to it. It took me a lot longer to pack than I had anticipated. When I was done, I headed upstairs for a snack. As fate would have it, the answering machine at the top of the stairs blinked red.

My body’s response didn’t make sense. Right away, my breathing became heavy. The hair on my arms stood on end, and my finger trembled as I hit play.

“Hello, Aislinn. My name is Wendy Tounsy, and I am with the Fine Arts of Geory Studio. I have your resume, and it seems you may be a fit for our apprenticeship position. I will be out of town all of next week and would like to interview you before I go. Would it be possible for you to come in the day after tomorrow at eleven? I know it’s a Sunday, but that is the only day I can see you. Please give me a call at 555-238-0978 and let me know as soon as possible. I look forward to hearing from you.”

I stared at the phone in disbelief. How could this be possible? Could anything else go wrong? Was our trip cursed? Reluctantly, I picked up the phone. I wanted to go on the trip, but I wanted to work at an actual studio more, and I really needed the money. The studio wasn’t one that Mr. Wellner had recommended to me, it was a position I’d applied for months ago, but necessity outranked desire.

“Ms. Tounsy.” The woman’s voice was rough, like that of a long-time smoker.

“Hello, this is Aislinn Moore. You called about the interview?”

“Yes, will you be able to make it?”

“I’ll be there. Thank you for the opportunity.” I tried to sound more professional than desperate, but my nerves made my voice tremble.

“Good. You can Google our address. See you Sunday.” Wendy hung up before I could say any more.

Before I headed back downstairs to unpack, I decided to give Hope a call to let her know what was going on. Her class had let out half an hour ago, so she would be home.

“Hey, Aislinn, you all ready for tonight?” Hope’s words came out rushed, showing her anxiousness to leave.

“I have a problem, Hope,” I sighed. “A few actually. First, I can’t go on the trip. I have an interview on Sunday and it’s really important.

“Second, Mel isn’t going either. Her mom needs her. But last night, I had a dream that Evan cheated on her, and now I don’t know what to do. He has a bad habit of cheating, and I know Mel wouldn’t want this. What should I do?”

“Bummer,” Hope grumbled. “I really don’t want to be stuck with three men all alone my first time snowboarding, but oh well. As far as Evan goes, I think you should talk to him.”

“What the heck am I going to say? Usually, I tell the woman he’s cheated on that he’s been unfaithful, and then I give him crap for a month, and eventually he forgives me for ratting him out, and we’re friends again. Not the best way of helping a friend in need,” I admitted.

“Then don’t do things that way,” Hope chuckled. “Just talk to him, tell him about your dreams. Let him know what you saw and see what he says. Trust yourself.”

“Ugh.” That phrase kept coming up. “He’ll be here soon. I should go. Have fun on your trip, and call when you get there.”

“Okay, Aislinn.” Hope’s voice was strained. “Good luck on both issues. Talk to you tonight.”

Just as I hung up the phone, Evan walked through the door with his head low.

“Hey, Aislinn,” he spoke softly. “Mel can’t go. You ready?”

“Gosh, Ev.” I bit the side of my lip. “I can’t either. A studio from the city called, and I have a weekend interview. Crazy, I know.”

Evan fell backward onto the couch, looking completely defeated. My stomach twisted, but I forced myself to sit next to him. I had no idea how to bring up my dream, or what he should do with the knowledge. All I knew was that he needed to know.

“Evan,” I almost whispered, trying to suppress the bile threatening to come up. “I’m not sure how to tell you this, but I think you need to know. Since I was a child, I’ve had dreams that come true. Last night, I had one about you.”

“You dreamed about me?” His question surprised me.

“Yes. Do you want to hear it?”

Evan nodded, but kept his gaze fixed on the coffee table.

I settled into the couch, pulling my feet up under me. “There were many parts to the dream. First, I followed you, but you couldn’t see me. You were in a store when a blonde approached you and began flirting. You were looking at something, and she bumped into you on purpose.” I watched his face turn from pleased, to stunned as I spoke. “The next thing I knew, she was knocking on the door to your hotel room. You didn’t want to let her in, but you did. She took off her clothes, and you cheated on Mel.”

A ghastly groan came out of Evan. He seemed disgusted with himself, and he hadn’t even done anything wrong.

Before I could continue, Evan interrupted me. “Paula. Her name is Paula. I know who she is.”

“You’re not even going to ask me about the dream? What if it was just a dream? You may be worried for nothing.”

“It wasn’t just a dream, Aislinn. You don’t need to prove yourself to me. For one, I trust you, and two, I already know her.” He cringed as he spoke.