The Grey God (War of Gods 4) (16 page)

“You’re making this too easy,” she said.

Jenn sensed his arousal. She had let him bait her. Worse, she’d taken the bait. The furious part of her wanted nothing to do with letting him admit she’d won until he was mewling at her feet. She also sensed his turmoil, a moment of insecurity that made her want to pounce for the win.

He’d saved her life. Rather than feel grateful, she felt shame that she’d caused them all such a problem and hadn’t been able to take care of herself. Anger and other emotions grew within her. She focused them on Darian, the man she tried to protect by convincing him she felt nothing for him.

He was wild, unlike the men she normally seduced, and that thrilled her. She could predict them but not Darian. Worse, he made her
feel
for the first time. The brush of their skin had jolted her with a rush unlike anything she’d ever felt. Convincing herself it was only his magic, she couldn’t help sensing once more there was something else between them. The way he looked at her, the emotion that stirred within her when they talked and touched.

Focusing hard on not letting him affect her, she continued her game of seduction, teasing him with looks, touches, whispers, until Darian’s body was rigid and his turmoil had melted into lust intense enough to make his eyes glow. She sidled up to him one last time, pausing close enough to hear him breathing. Triumphant yet still angry, she wriggled slowly out of her shirt, dropping it beside her.

Darian stepped away, his breathing quick. Jenn held his gaze, wanting with all her heart to convince him to walk away from her here, now. She’d beat his game. If she didn’t, she wasn’t sure she ever would. He should’ve been running for the door by now.

Instead, he stayed. She narrowed the distance again, this time rising up on her tiptoes to kiss him lightly on the lips, the final push over the cliff on which he teetered. The moment their lips met, lightning flew through her, setting every nerve afire with awareness unlike anything she’d felt before.

“Damn, you’re good,” Darian whispered. “I don’t know what that was, but I want more of it.”

“That’s how this works,” she replied, her body tingling with desire. “I win. You gotta walk away now.”

“Do I?” Darian’s voice was low and husky. “Is that what you really want, Jenn?”

“That was the deal,” she lied, meeting his gaze. “Walk away, Darian. For good.”

He studied her, his eyes lingering on her lips and the swells of her breasts before he met her gaze again. Instead of moving away, he rested his hands lightly on her arms. More of the warm electricity flowed into her.

“One more kiss,” he said.

Her triumph warred with the instinct that warned her she was doomed if she agreed. His large, warm hands drifted down her body to her hips. Jenn cupped Darian’s face with her hands then rose to kiss him lightly again on the lips and walk away. Only what she meant to do and what she did were two different things. The moment her lips touched his, she lingered instead of moving away.

Their faces inches apart, Jenn looked up into Darian’s eyes.

“You win,” he whispered and then kissed her.

Desire flew through her, hot and fast like the strange energy running between them. Jenn’s magic and senses came alive like they did in the immortal world. Darian’s scent and touch overwhelmed her while his hot kisses set fire to a desire stronger than any she’d ever experienced. She could think of nothing more than his bare skin against hers, of the feel of his muscles beneath her fingers.

“Darian?” Damian’s voice was accompanied by a knock at the door.

Darian withdrew. Jenn’s eyes opened, the sound snapping her out of the haze she was in. What she’d done—and been about to do—made her step back. Darian crossed to the door.

Jenn snatched her clothes and fled, Traveling to the one place where she knew the threat and it didn’t confuse her. She opened her eyes and found herself in the locker room at the Black God’s lair. Her hands were shaking and her body on fire with something she’d never felt before. She couldn’t control it, which terrified her.

She pulled on her shirt and jacket, turning towards her locker without opening it. Blood from whatever the vamps had put in it already pooled on the floor. She rubbed her face and shook out her arms, trying to fling away whatever was in her blood.

It didn’t work. Jenn paced for a short time, until a vamp entered. Too scattered for a confrontation, Jenn Traveled. Her thoughts turned to the one person she felt comfortable talking to.

“Jenn?”

She turned at the master assassin’s low voice. Dusty stood in the corner of a small hotel room, peering out the windows. His cold, chiseled features were bathed in the light of a streetlamp while his room was dark, aside from light lining the cracked bathroom door.

“
Ikir
wouldn’t spring for somewhere decent?” she asked, looking around in disgust. The sagging bed, moldy smell, and cracked window did nothing to settle her nerves.

“I hate living in shit,” Dusty said. He lowered the curtain, dropping the room into darkness. A moment later, a light clicked on. His cold eyes took in her features. “What’s wrong? Jonny do something stupid?”

“Nah. Him I can handle,” Jenn said. She sat down on a wobbly chair and wiped her face. “Just thought I’d drop in and say hi.”

“You’re too much like me to do anything without a purpose.”

“I guess.” Jenn smiled faintly, comforted by the presence of her friend. She and Dusty had been platonic lovers, sharing a bed and their frustrations, until Bianca swept him away. Though she missed her friend, Jenn couldn’t be happier for Dusty. She, too, adored Bianca. “What’re you doing in this hotel? You don’t like to get dirty.”

“Trying not to touch anything,” Dusty replied. “I’m being stalked. Every inch of this city is crawling with vamps. Perfect place for my new HQ, if I can find the right place.”

“At least there’s no snow here. I’m sick of the cold weather.”

“I doubt you came here to escape the cold.” He leveled his blue gaze on her. “You came here to escape something else, though.”

“Technically I think I’m running from me,” she admitted. “Kind of pointless. I just wanted someone to talk to and thought of you first.”

“I got time,” he said and sat down in a chair near the windows. “If you’re gonna cry, go see Jule. I don’t deal with that shit.” His faint smile softened the words.

“It’s not that bad,” she said. “It’s about … Darian.”

Dusty sighed. “He’s normal now, I hear.”

“As normal as he’ll ever be.”

“He couldn’t be normal when I was stuck with him,” Dusty said and muttered a few curses. As the brother charged with watching over Darian, Dusty had been responsible for keeping the Grey God from killing himself and others during his angry teenager stage. Jenn tried not to smile, recalling how frazzled the normally cold, organized assassin had been for months as he tried to juggle fighting the Black God with a teenage god.

“You raised him well.”

“I hope I beat some sense into him. It’ll surprise me if I did,” Dusty said.

“You did. He turned out well.”

“Obviously not, if you’re here.”

“It’s nothing he did,” she said, looking down.

“Did you try to kill him or something? I wouldn’t worry too much, if so.”

Jenn chuckled and shook her head.

“This is like a game show. You came here running from yourself and said it’s about Darian,” Dusty summarized. “I think I understand now. You’re falling for him.”

“No. I mean it’s not like that.”

“Not like
what
?”

“I don’t know, Dusty!”

“Start from the beginning.”

“There’s no beginning to start from,” she said, frustrated. “It’s nothing. I just got freaked out. It’s nothing. Really. It’s gone now.”

He studied her hard. Jenn rolled her eyes and leaned back in her chair. If her mind wasn’t so scattered, she’d have thought it odd he expressed none of the surprise she expected.

“Jenn, you remember what we learned when we went through training together, about how, when you realize how thirsty you are …”

“… you’ve already reached the point of dehydration,” she finished. “Yeah. Why?”

“Think about it. It’s a lot like love.”

Jenn let his words sink in. “You’re not saying … no, Dusty!”

“You already passed the point of no return,” he said. “There isn’t shit you can do about it.”

“One kiss does not mean I’m in … I’m dehydrated!”

“So it went that far?”

“What do you mean
that far
? I’ve gone so much farther with hundreds of men.”

“Thousands. And you never once came running to me, upset about a kiss,” he pointed out.

“It’s absurd. I’ve had a lot on mind. I’m just confused.”

“Like what?”

“Like … I went to my family’s obelisk in the immortal world. I remember my last day there. I remembered them,” she stumbled, unaccustomed to revealing her past. “How they died. How I wasn’t there for them. How I ran off just before the Schism killed them.”

“You never mentioned your family before.”

“I had a husband and a … a daughter. Both killed in the Schism.”

“I had no idea,” he said. “You still blame yourself for their deaths.”

“It’s my fault. I should blame myself,” she said. “I wasn’t there for her. My own …” She couldn’t say the words. They’d gone unspoken too long. They didn’t seem real. “Anyway, I broke some immortal law by going back. Darian basically had to trade a life debt to the Others to keep them from taking me. I just … they’re gonna come after me, Dusty.”

“I’m not sure I understood much of what you just said.”

She sighed and rubbed her face.

“But I understand what you’re feeling. You’ve spent your time since the Schism forgetting, only now you can’t. You’re vulnerable, feeling things you shouldn’t be. Right? ”

She nodded.

“There’s only one thing that can cause that,” he said. “Dehydration.”

“It doesn’t make sense.”

“Exactly. That’s how you know. It hits you when you least expect and certainly don’t want it to. As much as I hate to say this, there’s a reason fate pulls your guard down when it’s time for you to meet your match.”

“I never thought I’d hear you say something like that!”

“Me, neither. Did I tell you right before Bianca, I started dreaming of my sister?” he asked. “She died before the Schism. I rarely thought about her until that point when I began dreaming about her every night. I thought I was meant to die, and she was warning me.”

“You did for a short time,” she said, recalling the battle that killed Czerno, the previous Black God, and replaced him with Jonny. “She fixed you.”

“What I went through before was what you’re going through now. I, too, had my guard pulled down by my past. Nothing else in the world seemed out of place, except for that piece inside of you that you thought you buried.”

“That’s exactly it,” she said quietly. “Dusty, it can’t happen. If Jonny found out, if the Others grab me, they’ll use me to destroy Darian. I can’t let that happen to him again. I can’t let my emotions interfere with a mission.”

“When you’re dehydrated, you gotta drink the water,” Dusty teased. “I never would’ve been open to Bianca if there hadn’t been that … change within me.”

“I won’t do it, Dusty. I won’t put him in danger.”

“Or become vulnerable to someone else hurting you.”

“Or become vulnerable to … fuck you, Dusty,” she muttered. “Fine. That’s part of it. But it’s not all about me.”

“Of course not. You care about the other person in the equation.”

“You’re not helping.”

“I’ll tell you the truth, Jenn. It’s very simple.”

She looked up hopefully.

“You’re fucked.” He was smiling. “Things will either work out or they won’t. But it’s beyond your control now. What you need to focus on is surviving the next two weeks. After that, whatever happens, happens.”

“You’re right. I lost sight of my mission,” she said, grateful for the one piece of advice she could stomach. “But he’s with me there, Dusty. How do I protect him?”

“You don’t. You let him protect himself. Darian has magic far stronger than either of ours. You need to make your choices, and he needs to make his.”

“It feels like entrapment.”

“It is.”

She waited for more. “I guess I’m doomed.”

“A good assessment. I never saw that one coming, though,” he said. “I could’ve guessed Darian would fall for you the way he followed you around. But I thought you’d fall for someone less … wild.”

“I thought I’d never fall for anyone,” she retorted. “That was the plan.”

“You know I’ll keep your secret,” he said. “Now, you’ve got a mission, and so do I.”

Jenn rose. “Thanks, Dusty.”

“Take care.”

She nodded again before closing her eyes and Traveling back to Jonny’s. She appeared before the panoramic window and gazed out of it for a long moment before turning to face the foyer.

Jonny was there. Jenn jumped, surprised she hadn’t sensed anything.

“I just wanted you to know I wasn’t selling you out,” he said. “I want to do what’s right for my people, and it made sense to trade you to the Others, if they’d leave me alone.”

“I understand,” she forced herself to say. “No hard feelings.”

“Good. I really care about you,” he said, distracted. “Jenn, how did you get to the immortal world?”

Jenn met his intense gaze. The Black God bristled with contained power. He was calmer than she’d seen him in a while. The air around her felt thicker than usual.

“I’m not sure. By accident,” she said, recalling Darian’s words about the portal.

“Charles and Xander are actively looking for the portal,” Jonny said. “A Hunter and an Original Vamp can’t find it, yet you found it by
accident.
”

The air around her seized her and shoved her to her knees. Jenn didn’t fight it, instead gathering her magic for a push.

“Where is it, Jenn?”

“I don’t know, Jonny.” She kept her voice calm and even.

“Where did you go after Damian’s?”

“I went to see a friend.”

“A friend,” he repeated. “You didn’t go back to the immortal world?”