Authors: Cleary James
‘Well, I’ll see you tomorrow,’ she said as she went to the door.
Grayson went ahead of her and opened it. ‘See you tomorrow. Thank you for coming, Lisa.’ He bent and gave her a soft kiss on the lips.
‘Bye. You have my mobile number. Call me if you ... change your mind.’
‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ he said firmly as she turned to go.
Grayson watched the taxi pull away, then closed the door and went into the library. He poured himself a large whiskey and settled into one of the big armchairs by the fireplace, wishing Lisa were sitting opposite him in the other one. He didn’t want to go back to bed just yet – not when she wasn’t in it. He felt conflicted by this arrangement they had. On the one hand, he was getting everything he wanted – and on the other hand, nothing. Lisa would be sexually available to him every day this week, as often as he wished. She would give him her body, but she wouldn’t give herself to him – and he was beginning to realise that that was what he most wanted.
And what about when the week was over? He would be left with nothing – less than nothing, because he had a feeling that the more he had of Lisa, the more he would want from her, and when they were done, he would be left with this empty, gnawing hunger that she had created and that no one else could satisfy.
He didn’t like what the money said about either of them. If it made Lisa a whore, what did it make him? He wasn’t happy about exploiting her in that way, despite her assurances that it was what she wanted. He couldn’t shake the feeling that she was in some sort of trouble, and though he knew this was the only way she would let him help her, his conscience still nagged at him. He wished he could talk to Isabel about it, get her advice. But he had promised Lisa he wouldn’t tell anyone about their arrangement.
At least he knew she wanted him. He could console himself that she wasn’t hating every minute of it when she was with him, just enduring it for the money. He couldn’t have agreed to it if he thought that, no matter how desperate she was. But she had wanted him that night in the library. He had left it up to her, and she had made the first move. And she had wanted him tonight – there had been nothing fake about that look in her eyes. It was small comfort when they had only just begun and he was already starting to feel the pain of losing her.
Even Mark’s callous boorishness last night hadn’t been enough to crush her spirits. He had Skyped about half an hour after she had got home. He had only spoken to her to issue a series of orders about how she was to spend her time while he was away, and to quiz her about her day, checking up on how long she had worked out, what she had eaten, who she had spoken to. If only he knew, she thought, experiencing a little thrill of spiteful glee at having a secret from him.
Then he had told her to strip and touch herself for him, and they had had Skype sex. She had been alarmed to find that she felt dirty after it in a way that she hadn’t after having sex for money with Grayson. She was just glad that Mark was on the other side of the world and she didn’t have to actually endure his touch, his teeth tugging and biting at her skin, his hands rough as they pinched and dug into her flesh.
‘Oh, baby,’ he had panted when he was finished. ‘I miss you so much. That was great, but I can’t wait to get home and fuck you properly.’
Never, she thought. If she had her way, he would never touch her again.
‘Me too,’ she had said, smiling sweetly. Then she had closed the laptop and gone upstairs, relishing having the bed to herself. She had slept peacefully in blissful solitude, and sprang out of bed this morning feeling determined and purposeful. She ate breakfast, and worked out extra hard in the gym, challenging herself to run longer, to lift more weight – not for Mark’s sake, but for herself. She was on the treadmill when her mobile pinged with a message from Grayson. She was almost afraid to open it, suddenly afraid he might have changed his mind about their arrangement. But instead it said:
Have an hour free at 1.00. Meet me for lunch?
She answered yes immediately, and he texted back telling her to meet him at his offices.
This time she was immediately admitted to Grayson’s offices. The receptionist was obviously expecting her, and Gaby greeted her with a friendly smile.
‘I’m here to meet Grayson for, um ... lunch,’ Lisa told her with a shaky smile. She couldn’t help feeling discomfited. She didn’t think for a minute that Grayson would have informed Gaby that she would be stopping by to provide sexual services for him when he had an hour to spare. But it probably wouldn’t take her long to figure out what was going on when the two of them were locked up in his office for an hour with a ‘do not disturb’ order in place.
‘Yes, I know. Whatever you’re doing to him, keep it up,’ Gaby said cheerfully. ‘He doesn’t take a break often enough.’
Lisa blushed, feeling more embarrassed than ever. She doubted she’d get such wholehearted approval from Gaby if she knew exactly what it was she was doing to Grayson.
‘I’ll just tell him you’re here,’ Gaby said, picking up the phone.
Lisa expected to be told to go through to his office, but after speaking with Grayson, Gaby said ‘He’ll be with you in a moment,’ and waved her to a chair.
‘Oh. Thank you.’ Thinking about it, Lisa decided it made sense that they would go somewhere else. Yesterday she had taken him by surprise and it had been spontaneous. But he wouldn’t want to risk having sex in his office on a regular basis, and today he’d had time to plan. She was glad that he was being discreet, and she could at least preserve her dignity with Gaby.
‘Hi,’ Grayson appeared at the entrance to the office, pulling on his jacket. ‘Ready?’
Lisa nodded and stood. ‘Bye,’ she said to Gaby as she joined him.
‘I’ll be back in about an hour, hour and a half,’ Grayson said to Gaby.
‘No rush. Enjoy yourselves,’ Gaby called to them as they left.
Grayson took Lisa’s hand as they walked to the lifts. ‘Thank you for coming,’ he said as they stepped into the lift.
Lisa shrugged, knocked off balance once again by the way he treated her as if she was a girlfriend. ‘It’s what you’re paying me for,’ she said.
‘Thank you anyway.’ He leaned in and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. ‘It’s really nice to see you again.’
He led her across the lobby with a hand at her back and out through the revolving door into a waiting car. She was surprised when Grayson told the driver where they were going – a five-star landmark hotel in Mayfair. She hadn’t expected him to take her somewhere so up-market. It certainly wasn’t the sort of place that would rent rooms by the hour. But then, Grayson could easily afford to take a room there for the day, even if he only intended to use it for an hour or so. Besides, he was a classy guy – he wouldn’t want to go anywhere seedy, even for a lunchtime quickie. She was glad he was taking her somewhere nice – it made the whole thing feel a little less sordid and sleazy. At least she was a high-class hooker, she thought wryly.
But her heart sank when they arrived at the hotel and Grayson led her straight past reception and into the ritzy restaurant. She zoned out as he told the maitre ‘d that he had a reservation and they were led to their table. So much for not feeling sleazy, she thought, her heart pounding. She had thought they would have the privacy of a hotel bedroom. She wasn’t prepared for getting it on in a crowded restaurant.
The place was busy with the lunchtime rush, and the walls reverberated with the buzz of conversation and the clatter of plates and glasses. The clientele was mostly made up of suited businessmen and women. They looked high-powered and professional, and Lisa began to feel very uncomfortable and out of place. She didn’t imagine any of the other women were here to get felt up under the table or to give their man a little light relief over lunch. Certainly none of them looked like prostitutes – but then, hopefully neither did she.
They were shown to a corner table, and she felt very far from her comfort zone as Grayson sat beside her on the banquette. The waiter handed them menus and bustled off. She took in the room with its plush furnishings, crisp table linen and sparkling glasses and bit her lip, feeling nervous. Glancing around, she tried to judge how much she and Grayson could be overseen from the other tables, and how easy it would be to touch him under the table without anyone knowing what was going on. Her stomach curdled at the thought. Mark sometimes liked to play games in public, discreetly finger fucking her in a restaurant, or getting her to give him a blow job under his desk at the gallery. But she found it humiliating and embarrassing, and she had always hated it.
‘What’s wrong?’ Grayson asked, breaking into her thoughts. She looked up to find him frowning at her in concern.
‘Nothing,’ she said, noticing that she had been twisting her napkin into a knot and her shoulders were up around her ears. She clasped her hands together to stop them fidgeting. This was work, she reminded herself. She didn’t have to enjoy it. She just had to suck it up and get on with it.
The gesture didn’t escape him. ‘It’s something,’ he said, placing a warm hand over hers, stilling them. ‘What is it?’
‘I just– I’m not sure what you want me to do.’
He looked bemused. ‘Well, it’s a restaurant.’ His lips twitched in a smile.’ I want you to choose something to eat.’ He indicated her menu.
‘Oh, right. Okay.’
‘Hungry?’
‘Not very.’ She had been – she was always hungry – but now she felt too tense, her stomach in knots. She gazed unseeingly at the menu, unable to concentrate. She doubted she’d be able to eat anyway – the prospect of performing sexual acts in public had taken away her appetite.
‘Are you ready to order?’ Grayson looked queryingly at her as the waiter stood by their table, notebook and pen poised.
‘Oh, yes. I’ll have the prawn salad. Thank you.’ She handed the waiter back her menu. She had automatically zoned in on what Mark would have ordered for her if he were here, she realised.
Grayson ordered roast sea bass, and a bottle of sparkling water, declining wine as he had a busy afternoon ahead, including a site visit for one of his latest projects. ‘But you have some, if you like,’ he told Lisa.
‘No, thanks. I’ll just have water too.’
She was distracted, waiting for Grayson to make some move to let her know what he wanted, expecting every moment to feel his hand on her leg.
‘Lisa?’
She jumped at the sound of his voice, aware that she hadn’t been listening to him. ‘Sorry, what did you say?’
‘I just asked what you’ve been up to this morning.’
‘Oh, I just hit the gym.’
‘You work out a lot?’
‘Yes, every day for two or three hours.’
‘That’s very dedicated. You like it?’
‘No, not really,’ she said absently.
Grayson laughed. ‘Why do you do it so much if you don’t enjoy it?’
She shrugged. ‘For the results, I guess. It keeps me fit and in shape.’ She felt edgy and nervous, wishing he would just dispense with the small talk and do what they had come here for. Their food arrived and he continued to chat as he started to eat, telling her about the new project he was working on. He was clearly excited about it, but Lisa barely listened, just toying with her salad. Finally, she could bear it no longer.
‘What do you want me to do?’ she asked in a whisper, putting down her fork.
His brows knitted in confusion. ‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean, um ...’ She decided maybe it would be better if she initiated things. Perhaps that was what he expected. She put a hand on his thigh under the table, sliding it up to his crotch, her fingers finding his zipper.
‘Jesus!’ he gasped, grabbing her hand and pushing it firmly away.
‘Sorry,’ she blushed. ‘I thought–‘
He narrowed his eyes at her. ‘What do you think I brought you here for?’
‘Well ... sex,’ she whispered, leaning towards him so she wouldn’t be overheard. ‘I mean, that’s what you’re paying me for. I thought we’d go to a room, but–‘
His eyes widened, and he looked horrified.
‘I’m not objecting,’ she said hastily. ‘If you want to do it here, that’s fine. Just tell me what you want and I’ll do it.’
‘Christ!’ He leaned back against the banquette. Then he turned to her and took her hand. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said, looking into her eyes earnestly. ‘I guess I should have made myself clearer. I didn’t bring you here to have sex, or so you could get me off under the table. I just want to spend time with you.’
‘Oh.’
‘Is that okay?’
‘Yes, of course,’ she said faintly. ‘Whatever you want.’ But she wasn’t sure that it
was
okay. She almost wished he would make her get on her knees and suck him off under the table. It would be easier if they didn’t blur the lines, if he just treated her like his sex toy, bought and paid for to cater to his every demand. The nicer he was to her, the harder it was going to be not to fall for him.
‘Are you sure? I like you, Lisa. I’d like to spend time with you, not just in bed – though obviously I want that too.’
‘But ... you’re paying me.’
‘Yes, I’m paying you.’
‘Just to have lunch with me?’
‘Just for the pleasure of your company.’
‘Why?’
‘Would you be here if I wasn’t paying you?’ he asked, his eyes telling her he knew the answer.
‘No,’ she admitted, looking away.
‘I’d like to get to know you better, Lisa. I’m paying you for your time. Does it matter how I choose to use it?’
‘No, I guess not,’ she said, fighting the warm feeling it gave her that he wanted to get to know her as a person, that he had said he liked her. ‘It’s your dime,’ she added, mentioning the money to remind him of the nature of their arrangement. They may like each other, but this wasn’t a date. It wouldn’t lead anywhere. They would never have a relationship. She was on a job. Whether they were having sex or just talking, it was still just a business transaction between them.
‘Understood,’ he said with a sad smile, and Lisa felt a pang. She got the impression she’d hurt his feelings. ‘I just want you to relax and enjoy lunch.’
‘Okay,’ Lisa said, picking up her fork again, her appetite returning as her tension melted away. ‘I can do that.’
It didn’t have to mean anything, she told herself. As long as they both understood it was nothing more than a business arrangement, they could enjoy each other’s company in or out of bed. She would be like Vivian in
Pretty Woman
. After all, she had been a hooker, but Richard Gere’s character had paid her to spend time with him in other ways besides having sex. She tried to silence the little voice inside her head that reminded her that story had ended with them falling in love.