The Education of Sebastian & the Education of Caroline (95 page)

When she finally spoke, she spat the words at me.

“The matter, Sebastian, is that you’re a minor. What we’ve just done … what
I’ve
just done … it’s against the law. It’s a felony, for God’s sake!”

Oh. Was that all?

“But I love you.”

Simple. See how easy it is?

But she didn’t look happy.

“Sebastian: it’s
statutory rape!
Do you know what that means? I could go to prison. If anyone found out…”

Fuck, no! That can’t be right!

“I won’t tell anyone. I love…”

“Don’t say it! Do
not
say it!” she yelled the words, and it was just as if she’d hit me. I couldn’t understand what was wrong. I wasn’t going to tell anyone—tonight had been the best night of my whole life. I didn’t want her to feel bad about it, just because I was a few weeks shy of my eighteenth birthday. Nobody cared about that shit. Half the kids in my school were fucking each other. You couldn’t go to a football game without tripping over couples screwing behind the bleachers.

Suddenly, she sat up and ran to the bathroom, kneeling over the toilet as if she was going to be sick. I leapt off the bed, standing behind her, afraid to see her reaction.

If you’d just let me hold you!

“Caroline, please.”

But she held out her hand like a traffic cop. She didn’t want me.

She didn’t want me!

“Please!” I knew my voice was begging, begging her. “Oh, God, please, Caroline!”

I tried to hold her, but she pushed past me.

“No!” she shouted.

She collapsed onto the bed, her whole body shuddering.

“What have I done? What have I done?”

She repeated the words over and over, then hid her head in her hands.

Slowly, I sat down next to her, trying to find the words to explain how I felt; trying to find some way to show her that it was okay.

“I’m not sorry,” I whispered. “That was the best experience of my whole life. I love you; I can’t help it.”

I felt relieved when she let me pull her against my chest, wrapping my arms around her, stroking her arms and kissing her hair.

But then she sat up and pushed me away. Again.

“I apologize, Sebastian. It isn’t your fault. Please forgive my … behavior.” Her voice was so cold, a shiver of terror ran through me. “I think you’d better leave now.”

Oh God, no! NO!

“Please. Don’t send me away.”

But she didn’t reply. She didn’t reply because she didn’t want me.

The world crashed around me and I thought I was going to pass out. My heart was hammering in my chest, and my vision was blurred. Was I crying? I touched my face, amazed to find that my cheeks were wet.

Her body was turned away from me, stiff and unyielding.

Moving as if in a dream, I walked into the bathroom and dressed slowly. By the time I’d pulled on my sweatshirt, she’d already gone. The bedroom was empty, and only the rumpled sheets showed that my world had just imploded.

I made it down the stairs without breaking, but when I saw her, standing in the kitchen, her face softened and she started to cry.

“Oh, Sebastian!”

Half a heartbeat later, she was in my arms, her cheek against my chest, and she let me stroke her hair.

Oh, God, just let me hold you, Caro. Please don’t send me away.

“Don’t be sad, Caroline, I love you. It’ll be okay.”

She started laughing, her hiccupping giggles mixing in with gasps and cries. She stared up at me, so beautiful, and I wiped away her tears with my thumbs, heartbroken that I’d made her feel like this.

I had to show her how I felt; I had to let her know that it was going to be okay—that
we’d
be okay. I opened my mouth to speak, but it was too late.

We heard the car at the same time.

“David!”

That fucker.

I could hear the panic in her voice.

“You have to go! Quickly! Out through the backyard. Go!”

I turned to run to the door, then skidded to a halt. “When will I see you again?”

“I don’t know! Go! Go!”

I was desperate.

“Promise I’ll see you again! Promise me!”

“Okay, I promise!” she said, staring horrified at the front door.

I pulled her to me, kissing her fiercely.
My woman.
And then I ran.

I’d only gotten as far as the fence at the bottom of her yard, when I stopped.
This was wrong
, so wrong. What if she needed me? What if he’d come home because he knew? What if he hurt her? I
had
to stay.

I stood in the shadows, staring up at the light in her window.

My body was tense, my hands welded into fists at my side. I couldn’t leave her with
him
. I loved her, she loved me. We were supposed to be together.
This was wrong.

“Caroline,” I whispered. “I love you.”

I’d find a fucking way for us to be together. No one would stop us.

LONG TIME LIVING

“He’s a mess, Mom.”“I know.”

“Yeah … but I’m really worried about him.”

She gave me a look—the one that said,
What aren’t you telling me?

“Ches?”

It was breaking the code: the brother code, as well as the military code that said,
Snitches get stitches and wind up in ditches.

I took a deep breath.

“He had another bruise today. He wouldn’t say anything, but I’m pretty sure his dad…”

Her lips thinned with anger.

“…and he was sent home from work again. If he shows up with another bust lip or black eye, he’ll lose his job. Miss Perez said she can’t have him looking all banged up like that in front of the members.”

I didn’t tell Mom that the only reason Seb still had a job at all was because he was popular with the country club’s cougars. Not that he ever did anything with them even though he had plenty of chances—he was only interested in one cougar, and she was history.

I’d taken up quite a few of the offers I’d gotten, but I kept it on the down low because despite everything I thought about Seb’s Mrs. Wilson, he missed her—and she’d been his first.

I was really surprised when he told me that, because I’d always assumed that he and Brenda had got it on. He said they hadn’t, and I believed it. What I didn’t tell him was that Brenda was singing a different tune—pretty loudly, too.

Sebastian is like my brother and I’d helped get him the summer job at La Jolla club where I already had part-time work. It had been good. Hell, it had been great. But then the whole cluster fuck with Caroline Wilson had happened.

I couldn’t believe my best friend had been so dumb as to get involved with a married woman. Not just involved, but fucking deaf, dumb and blind in love with her. And even though she was like 30, which is practically ancient, I had to admit she was hot—a total babe, if I’m honest.

Seb said that they loved each other. At first, skeptical had been my middle name but it seemed like it was true. She’d left her husband for my friend, and lost everything in her old life. The last words that she said to him before they sent her away was that she loved him.

Well, that’s what he told me she’d said. She was speaking Italian at the time so I guess it was like a private message from her to him. But there was no doubting what I saw in his eyes. The mindbender was she was in love with him, too.

But, like I said, she was 30 and even now Seb was still six weeks away from his 18
th
birthday. Seb’s asshole dad threatened to have Caroline arrested if she didn’t leave quietly. Not only that, but she has the Statute of Limitations hanging over her for the next three years. If they contact each other, Donald will try and have her sent to prison, or at the very least, get her name put on a sex offender registry.

And Seb was falling apart. He’d been in pieces since she’d gone. He kept saying that she was the only good thing that he had in his life. If it wasn’t for the fact that he was holding onto the hope that they could be together again in three years, I think he might have done something even more
dumb.

It scared me to see how desperate he was.

But when I thought about it, it wasn’t that surprising either. Seb had a shitty mom and a bastard of a father. There were no grandparents, as far as I knew, and my own mom and dad had been more parents to him than his own. So there’d just been Caroline Wilson.

Mom was still watching me, and I realized that I’d left her hanging.

“Can Seb come and stay with us? I mean, it’s only like six weeks—maybe a couple of months—and then he’ll be joining the Marines and he’ll be away from here.”

“I don’t know,” she said, slowly. “I’d love to say yes, but I can’t see Donald and Estelle going for it.”

“Mom, they freakin’ hate him! His dad is whaling on him, his mom yells at him all the time or is drunk off her ass! He’s miserable—it just sucks. He’s damn near
my brother
!”

She sighed heavily.

“Has he said that Donald hits him?”

“No, but it’s pretty fu… freakin’ obvious.”

She shook her head and muttered something under breath that I couldn’t catch.

“I’ll speak to your father.”

That’s all I could do for now.

“Okay, thanks, Mom. I gotta go—Seb and I got the late shift so I won’t be home till after midnight.”

She pulled me into a tight hug, which took me by surprise. She didn’t usually go around hugging people that much, even me.

When I got to Seb’s place, I leaned on the horn. We were cutting it close and he should have been outside waiting for me.

I saw the front door open and Seb walked out. Limped might have been a better word, and he’d got his hood pulled up.

“Ah shit, man! Not again!”

He didn’t speak as he pulled himself onto the front seat, but I could see that his cheek was bruised and he had a black eye.

I shook my head. “No way Perez will let you work looking like that.”

“The other guy looks worse,” he said, an ironic smile twisting his mouth.

I put the van in drive and headed out to La Jolla. Seb didn’t speak the whole way, just stared out of the window, but I don’t think he was looking at the passing scenery.

I parked around the back of the country club and jumped out. Seb was moving slowly, holding his ribs.

His luck was so shitty that I really shouldn’t have been surprised when Miss Perez walked out at the exact moment we were heading in.

She did a double take when she saw Seb.

“What happened to you
this
time, Mr. Hunter?” she snapped. “Another surfing accident? Tripped over paving stone on the sidewalk? I don’t think so. It’s quite clear to me that you’ve been fighting. Well, I can’t have you upset the members by them seeing you like that. You’ve had one warning already and…”

“He wasn’t fighting!” I said, quickly. “Ask his fucking father how he got those bruises!”

“Ches, no!”

Seb looked furious as he clipped out the words, but Miss Perez was shocked.

“Commander Hunter … your father did this to you?”

“It was an accident,” said Seb, refusing to meet her worried gaze, instead staring over her left shoulder.

“Just tell her, man!”

“Stay out of it, Ches.”

She sighed. “I’m sorry, Sebastian, very sorry, but I can’t let you work looking that. I need someone here I can rely on. This is third time I’ve had to send you home. I’m making it official—I’m letting you go.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, but Seb just nodded curtly and turned on his heel.

I glared at her. “You can’t fire him like that!”

“Watch your tone, Mr. Peters,” she said, her voice a warning. “I can’t get the Club involved in this—Sebastian needs to tell the police if there’s a problem at home.”

“You know he won’t,” I said, bitterly.

“Take him home,” she said, “but if you want to keep your job, be back here by 4PM.”

Then she walked away.

Seb was already halfway down the long driveway when I caught up with him.

“Get in, I’m giving you a ride.”

He shrugged, but didn’t speak. I didn’t know what else to do, so I drove him home. To my home.

Dad’s car was there and Mom was standing out front on her way to the grocery store.

“Chester why are you home so … oh, Sebastian! Oh sweetheart!”

She bustled him into the kitchen and got an ice pack from the freezer.

“Here, this will help with the swelling.”

He took it wordlessly and pressed it against his cheek, wincing slightly.

Then Dad walked in from the backyard and took in the scene with a single glance. When he looked at me, he nodded once.

“Seb, buddy, you need to stay here for a few days,” he said.

Seb shook his head. “Can’t. Dad says we have to … keep up appearances.”

“You leave Commander Hunter to me.” My father’s voice allowed no argument. “Ches, give me a hand, son.”

Outside, Dad grabbed a hold of my shoulder. “We’ll get this figured out, I promise. Seb can stay here as long as he likes. I’m going to the Hunters’ place now. You might want to clear some space in that pigsty you call a room.” He gave me a thin smile. “I’ll bring back as much of Seb’s things as I can.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

He nodded, but didn’t reply.

I watched as he drove off in the van, his face tight with anger. I wondered what he was going to do. No, that’s not right. I knew
what
he was going to do; I just wondered
how
he was going to do it.

Mom was talking to Seb quietly in the kitchen, so I headed up the stairs to my room. Dad was so damn military: what he called a ‘pigsty’ was a pair of old jeans and two pairs of boardshorts that I hadn’t put away. And some t-shirts, and a bunch of CDs, old copies of
Surfer
magazine, a few used coffee mugs. It wasn’t
that
untidy. I mean, there wasn’t any green moldy food…

I cleared some space in my closet and shoved the magazines and CDs under my bed.

Then I pulled out a cot and put a sheet on it and a couple of blankets. Seb had slept on it a load of times; he’d been overnighting here since we’d met as freshmen at high school. Seemed like a million years ago right now.

A few minutes later, I heard Seb coming up the stairs. His face still looked puffy and the bruise around his eye was coming out, but he seemed calmer now, less jittery.

“You wanna talk?”

He shook his head. “Mind if I crash out here? I didn’t sleep much last night.”

“Sure. I’ve gotta get back to work. Look, I’ll talk to Perez. Maybe I can…”

“Nah, that’s okay. I was sick of working there anyway. It’s not the same since Caro…”

His words trailed off.

“What are you going to do?”

He shrugged painfully. “There’s a help wanted sign posted at Stone’s Reef Surf Shack. I’ll drop by there later.”

He stretched out across the bed and closed his eyes, so I left him to sleep off whatever demons were haunting him.

Mom gave me a ride back to the Club, saying she’d text me when Dad got back.

I was on lifeguard duty by the outdoor pool when I groaned to see who had just arrived. This day wasn’t getting any better.

“Hi Ches!” Brenda said in an irritating sing-song voice. “Is Seb around?”

She stood there smiling, her hand on her hip, with no fucking clue of the carnage she’d created in my friend’s life.

“Nope,” I said, then added quietly, “and if he was, he wouldn’t want to talk to you.”

Her face showed a range of emotions: surprise, guilt, pleasure, anger, annoyance.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means,” I said, lowering my voice still further, “that he wouldn’t want to talk to a trouble-making bitch like you.”

Her superior smile faltered for a moment, then her lips curled into a sneer.

“Caroline fucking Wilson deserved everything she got.”

My temper snapped.

“You’re a bitch, Brenda. I don’t know when or how that happened, but you’re a fucking, cold bitch.”

And I walked to the other side of the pool, just to get away from her.

She scowled, but didn’t try to follow me.

It was nearly 1AM by the time I got home. I was physically tired but my brain was wide awake. It didn’t look like anyone else was sleeping either, because the lights were still on in the house.

Mom was curled up on the couch with a blanket over her legs, and Dad was watching a ballgame.

“How come everyone’s still up? Where’s Seb?”

“Sit down, Chester. We just need to lay down a few ground rules now Seb is going to be living here.”

Dad didn’t usually call me by my full name so I pinned back my ears and listened.

“I went to see Donald Hunter. He’s agreed to allow Seb to stay here until he turns 18 and enlists. I’ve brought most of his things, so there’s no need for him to go back there. But this stays in the family, okay? I don’t walk you telling this to anyone.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it, Dad. No breaking the military code—even for a douche like Donald Hunter.”

“It’s not that, son.” I watched as Dad scrubbed his hands over his buzz cut. “I had to make some serious threats against him—against a senior officer—do you understand what that means?”

“Your father could get in a lot of trouble,” Mom said, resting her hand on my arm. “And it’s better for Sebastian if he can just put this whole, horrible business behind him.”

I didn’t know if she meant Seb’s father beating him or his affair with Mrs. Wilson. Probably both.”

“Yeah, okay, but what does Seb say?”

“Not much. He’s happy to stay here for now.”

“So, the douche is still making him enlist? No college?”