The Decimation of Mae (The Blue Butterfly) (11 page)

His steps stuttered beside me and he released a deep
sigh.

“I’m sorry, Master,” I muttered quickly. I wasn’t really
but I couldn’t cope with any more head abuse.

I glanced up at him when he shook his head slowly. His
eyes dropped to mine and I fought the excitement in my belly when I was greeted
to amusement on his face. He pinched the bridge of his nose and groaned. “Whatever
am I going to do with you, lamb?”

I remained silent. He didn’t expect an answer to his
statement, and I didn’t offer one.

His hand paused on the door handle to the room he had
come from. “You will remain silent. You will refuse eye contact with anyone
unless requested. You
will
behave
. You will allow anything asked
of you…”

“Whoa…”

He turned sharply. I shuddered when his fingers spread across
the nape of my neck and squeezed. “I repeat…” he hissed as he tightened his
grip, making my brain swell with the pressure. I whimpered when lightning fired
across my vision, huge strikes of electricity alerting me to the fact that we
would soon have a problem on our hands.

“Master…” I whimpered as I tried to alert him to the
direction my illness was taking that particular day.

“Shut – up. I will no longer accept your unruliness. You
no longer have thoughts or decisions. You are controlled. You are a robot
awaiting orders.” I squealed when his grip constricted. “Is that understood?”

Well I wasn’t going to say no, was I? I mumbled a yes. It
was all I could manage under the terrifying ghosts dictating my vision. My
brain was beginning to vibrate, the tell-tale sign that I was going to lose all
motor skills very shortly.

I didn’t want to embarrass my Master when it happened,
when my tumour declared its presence so chillingly. Yet, I wanted to humiliate
him at the same time. He didn’t deserve to be alerted to the potential
catastrophe of what would happen to me.

His hand slid into my hair. I squealed when he seized the
roots at the nape of my neck and twisted them. I was no longer allowed to
follow. I was dragged alongside him instead. My scalp burnt under the grip of
his long fingers.

I kept my eyes trained at the floor. I wasn’t even sure I
wanted to see what greeted me in the room. The deep red carpet gave me all the
interest I needed, its hue the same deep crimson that flowed from each of my
many defacements. I was mesmerised by it.

I swallowed and squeezed my eyes closed when a thousand
insects appeared to slither across my path, forewarning me that the hallucinations
were imminent and delirium threatened to take my sanity.

“Master,” I gasped as panic overwhelmed me. My heart rate
increased rapidly. He would not be happy with my behaviour if I upset his
guests. “Master, please.”

He hissed through his teeth and dug his fingers into a
section of soft flesh on the side of my neck causing a severe pain to surge
down my backbone, each groove of my spine screaming in agony.

Right, that decided my fate. There would be no more
attempts to warn him. He would get the shock value along with whoever else was
in the room.

Master led me over to what looked like a Perspex podium;
a tall clear column of plastic topped with a large sturdy looking disc of thick
transparent plastic similar to the base. Okay. Why did that particular piece
worry me?

I jerked back when he pulled on my hair, declaring his
demand for me to stand before the odd piece of furniture. “Get up!” he hissed
quietly through his teeth.

“You’re actually putting me on a pedestal?” I scoffed.

 The potency of his anger clogged my throat, making my
body hypersensitive and my breathing still. Why the hell couldn’t I just shut
up? What was wrong with me?

I sizzled angrily in his hard hold when he hoisted me up
and yanked me to his side. “I will not allow your rudeness in front of my
guests, Mae. You won’t like the consequences of your actions if you humiliate
me.”

I rolled my eyes and huffed. Master frowned at me as a
nasty bite to my brain caused me to sway in his hold. “Is your tumour giving
you grievance?”

“Not as much as you!” I bit back.

Holy fucking shit, Mae. I must have had a death wish.
Well, actually, I did.

“Keep pushing, lamb.” I swallowed at the cold smile he
gave me. It seeped inside me and made me shiver involuntarily. His smirk grew
wider as the effect he had on me presented itself clearly through my body. “You
have a right to be scared.” He leaned further into my ear, his teeth clamping quite
delicately over my soft lobe. “I will crush you in a heartbeat should your
insolence prove extra difficult this morning. And don’t think the loss of
earnings associated with your death will bother me, I’m sure half a million
won’t put a dent in my grocery budget.”

“You arsehole.”

My head bashed against the plastic pillar when Master’s
fist exploded my cheekbone. Fire surged from the base of my spine and up my
vertebrae, bursting excruciating agony behind my eyes.

My Master was one lucky son of a bitch. His violence
halted my encroaching lunacy. The beating he gave me snatched my consciousness,
therefore removing any threat my tumour had planned for me.

Darkness swallowed me and the pain granted me feverish
bleak oblivion.

I sensed him beside me but I kept my eyes closed before I
allowed him to set his fury free on me. His anger was tangible, coating me in
the thick substance of rage. His heavy breathing was rhythmic and hypnotic,
lulling me into a false sense of comfort.

My head seemed better, although a dull throb pulsed in my
temples; however, I sensed that was more to do with the hammering I’d received
for yet another of my loose-tongued errors.

My face felt only slightly swollen which mystified me.
I’d have thought after the furious pelts he’d rained on me that I would have
resembled an overweight woman with an addiction to Botox.

Okay, so not too bad considering what my body had once
again fought against.

I inhaled deeply and peeked through one eye. Master sat
in a chair beside my bed, his elbows resting casually on his knees as he leaned
towards me. I was shocked to find him in pale blue jeans and a white T-shirt,
the soft cotton clinging to every delectable muscle across his impressive chest.

He continued to stare at me. I couldn’t get an indication
of his mood from his expression, his eyes were cold as usual but his face was
lax and soft. “Welcome back, Mae.”

“Hi.” I cracked open my other eye, amazed to find my
vision completely fine. I had expected either my Glioma to blur it, or damage
to my retinas from Master’s hits. From the slight sting in my arm though, I
knew Dr Galloway had been called to tend to me.

Master took a deep breath and leaned back into the chair,
crossing one ankle over his thick thigh and linking his fingers together in his
lap. I couldn’t help dropping my gaze to appreciate the view. I hated how
perfect he was. It made it difficult to breathe as my heart and head balked with
hatred, but my belly and pussy burnt in need.

His intense study of me became uncomfortable, his deep
gaze suffocating and devouring. I cleared my throat and shuffled up the bed
until my back rested against the headboard. My body was once again covered by
the simple pink slip. It felt strange to be comforted by an item of clothing,
yet the nightdress did exactly that. It felt like it belonged to me, and there,
where nothing belonged to me, it gave me a sliver of reassurance and solace, as
stupid as that sounded.

He sighed again and twisted his lips, thoughts and
contemplations racing through his eyes. He clicked his tongue rapidly on his
teeth as his eyes narrowed on me. “How long do you have?” It was asked so
bluntly that a lump formed in my throat. If he’d have smacked me with a cricket
bat it wouldn’t have made much difference to the shock factor.

I squirmed and dropped my eyes. “I’m not sure…” I gulped
but powered on. “I’m not sure that is any of your concern.”

His chin lifted slightly but other than that he showed no
signs of offence with my answer. “Ahh, but that is where you are wrong, my
little lamb. It has everything to do with me.”

“Well, I’m sorry but I beg to differ,” I replied
indignantly. It had absolutely bollocks all to do with him. I was slightly
pleased at myself when I managed to keep those last few words in my head
without them spewing from my mouth

He chuckled softly and sighed with a hint of sadness. I
frowned when he reached down and picked something off the floor. The corner of
the bed restricted my view and I couldn’t see what he had until he held it up
with one finger, exactly like I had. Oh dear.

I gulped and hesitantly lifted my eyes from the silk
knickers I had refused to wear, to Master’s eyes. One of his eyebrows was
elevated, giving him an amused expression but the infuriation in his eyes
chilled my bones.

He bent yet again and I squeezed my eyes closed. I didn’t
need to see what he had retrieved this time.

“Open your eyes, lamb.”

My stomach turned over. I refused to witness what he
held. If I didn’t look then he wasn’t holding the proof of my misbehaviour.
“I’m sorry,” I offered without releasing my eyelids from their defensive position.
I didn’t want to see what furious expression he held whilst swinging those
around his other finger, which I had no doubt he would be.

“Now is not a good time for your lack of discipline to
exasperate me any further. Open – your – eyes and look at me. Show some
courage. I know it’s in you, Mae. You’ve shown it enough times, but
unfortunately, always at the wrong times.”

The clench in my stomach didn’t ease when I relented and
opened my eyes; it twisted more when I found each offensive item spinning
around each of his forefingers.

His smile was sinister, his blazing eyes fixed on me,
sucking the air from my lungs like he had comic book superpowers.

“I’m sorry, “I repeated in a whisper.

He nodded slowly. Initially I thought it was a nod of
forgiveness but that soon turned to horror when he muttered three simple words.
“Time to play.”

I didn’t care that I resembled a rabid dog when I started
panting in sheer fright. I didn’t like the sound of that. It left my fate wide
open.

He swung the bright yellow Lycra cycling shorts faster
and faster until he flicked his finger and they shot across the space between
us and slapped me in the face. “You acquire the privilege to wear those to the
next breakfast meeting…” My breath refused to listen to what was coming and gushed
the wrong way out making me splutter stupidly. “If you answer my questions
truthfully.”

Panic set in and I stared at him, my eyes wide and round
as my chest heaved.

“However,” he continued, “refuse and you get to wear these…”
He neatly placed the knickers across one of his thighs, ironing them out
smoothly, “…and only these.”

“What? No dress?”

He shook his head slowly. “No dress, Mae.”

“And if I refuse?” I didn’t care if I was riling him. I
was tired of playing his games, exhausted with trying to figure out his next
move on the board.

He laughed coldly. “Please give me the satisfaction of
allowing me to demonstrate that particular choice. There is nothing more delicious
that would make my cock hard than watching you swing naked, bleeding and
bruised from a chain wrapped around your pretty little neck.”

My jaw dropped. “My God. You’re just…” I snapped my mouth
closed, my brain freaking out at my stubborn will to voice my thoughts.

“Yes, I am
just
.” He leaned forward again but this
time steepled his fingers and ran the tips of them along his lips. I could
sense his excitement and I had no doubt he wished for my denial, the sick fuck.

“Fine,” I spat. I didn’t need to ask what his first
question was, he’d already asked it. “Two months at most.”

His lips thinned as a tic twitched in his cheekbone. He
nodded. “Why did you refuse the offer of treatment?”

“Master, this really is of no consequence…”

“Answer the damn question, Mae!” he shouted, making me
flinch.

I scowled at him, nevertheless I growled out the answer.
“Because there’s no point.”

He eyed me warily. “Oh come on, lamb. There’s always purpose.”

“Not really.”

“No, I apologise but I do not agree. Life is life,
whether it be a mere dull existence or a rainbow of brilliant colour. Every
heart beats the same as another. Every soul deserves the chance to shine.”

“Yet you’re willing to snatch life away so easily.”

I was surprised by his tolerance to my argument. I had
expected his ire at my debate but he spoke as if we were having a casual
conversation over coffee.

“Because I have been given that job if you fail to meet
the specifications.” He was open and forthright, granting me hope to dig
deeper.

“I don’t understand, Master. Your job?”

He nodded once, his beautiful brown eyes never leaving
mine. “Yes. I am an auctioneer.”

“An auctioneer of what?” I internally begged him to keep
going. His game of interrogation had switched, the topic now him and I was
hungry for information, necessity to find out the truth driving me into the
danger zone.

He snorted as though I was stupid. “Why, you and other
stock, of course.”

“Other stock?”

He frowned at me. “Yes. Did you think there was just you
in my guardianship?”

“Oh my God. There’s more here?”

“You and one other, yes.” He shifted forward towards the
bed and placed both of his palms on the edge. “You are both stock, objects for
the buyers to barter against.”

My mouth was too dry. I couldn’t seem to form words as my
heart galloped in my chest and my stomach threatened to tear up my throat. “I…”

He laughed. “Yes, and you’ve become quite the booty, so
to speak. I’m actually quite amazed at how many bids you have received in the
previous three years.”

The room swam when my vision blurred, this time having nothing
to do with my illness. “Th...Three years?”

The information I had been desperate for sickened me. I
wanted to remove the knowledge I held, scorch it from my mind and leave behind
a black charred chasm that wouldn’t be half as painful as what currently
possessed that section of my sanity. There was only one explanation for his
revelation and that thought sucked out my soul. I asked the question although I
already knew deep down what the answer would be. “How?”

He rolled his eyes but smiled. I flinched when he yanked
back the blanket covering me. Scuttling back when he reached out, he growled
and wrapped his fingers around my ankle, pulling me back down the bed towards
him. I cowered when he lugged up my nightdress.

I gulped when he softly drew his finger along a small
scar on the outside of my left thigh. “How did you get this scar, Mae?”

I shook my head. “I… I don’t know.”

He nodded and gave me a crooked smile, both pride and
hilarity glowing across his features. “I do.”  He ran his finger up and down
the tiny one inch silver line. “I gave it to you.”

“You gave me many scars, both internally and externally.”
My unrestricted truth lifted his eyes to mine. A glimpse of pain flickered
across his eyes, turning the deep rich brown into a dim hazel tinge. Was it
remorse he exhibited or dismay at my recurring careless statements?

“I did. Nevertheless,” he continued, “you won’t remember
me creating it. You were unconscious at the time.”

I shivered, horror at what he was saying filling me.
“What… what did you do to me after?”

I had no idea what had happened after Daniel had injected
some sort of toxin into my veins after he had cruelly taken what he wanted from
me. All I could remember after waking in my apartment two days later was how
sore my whole body had been. I was too scared to go to the police. I knew they
wouldn’t appreciate a young girl stupidly going to a stranger’s house, dressed
like a slut. If I was honest with myself, I knew I would have given Daniel my
virginity that night anyway. But I had been foolish, I thought it would have
come with romance, softness and gentle caresses. I’d even packed bloody condoms
in my bag. In the end it would have been a costly case of me, a wayward
teenager with a history of depression, drug abuse and self-harm against a high
powered businessman. And let’s face it, the house that Daniel had taken me to
was not one a mere working class person could have afforded.

It turned out it hadn’t even been his house. I had
plucked up the courage four days later to cycle past at speed, just for a hint
of something, anything to fill the gap in my memories, the gaping black hole he
had created in my existence. Then when I had gotten there, a small throng of
people were being shown around on an open auction day. How Daniel had acquired
the keys to the place was beyond me, but his trouble at entering the correct
gate code and inserting the right key in the lock had suddenly made sense.

But by then it was too late. All
evidence
had gone
and the internal conflict of my stupidity deterred my desire to report it.

“Oh, don’t worry, lamb. I didn’t take you again. Although,
in truth, I debated it. You were quite something. In spite of this, I like my
partners to be sentient.”

The conversation was becoming surreal. “Please, just tell
me. What did you do?” I practically begged him, although I wasn’t sure I wanted
to hear the answer.

He blinked softly at me, a faint smile tilting his lips
gently. “You’re wearing a tracker, Mae.”

I fell backwards, my back bouncing off the head of the
bed as shock took over and I lost management of my own body. I struggled to
breathe, each tiny pocket of air in my lungs rapidly firing up my throat in short
little whimpers. Tears congested behind my eyes, stinging my ducts.

My eyes bulged when realisation hit me. Panic saw me
scrambling from the bed towards him. He reared back when I grabbed at him, the
material of his T-shirt bunching between my fists. “What do you know? How much
do you know about…? Do you know? Do you?” I fired hurriedly in desperation.

I winced when his hand encompassed my throat and he
pushed me back. “I suggest you hold onto that temper, Mae. Use it on me again
and I’ll punish you severely.”

“But I need to know,” I choked out, my voice high and
tight as I pushed past the restriction on my voice box. “Please. Do you know?”

“Know?” He narrowed his eyes curiously on me. “Know what,
Mae? What are you hiding?”

He obviously didn’t know or he wouldn’t be asking. I
relaxed a little, forcing myself to calm down before he probed any farther into
my behaviour. “You’ve been watching me for three years?”

He relaxed his hold when he sensed my control. “No, like
I said, you have a tracker, not a damn internal camera. Why are you so worried,
lamb?”

I swallowed. “Wouldn’t you be worried if someone had been
following you around for three years? I mean, what the fu…heck? You can’t do
that. It’s… it’s wrong. So, so wrong.”