The Dating List (12 page)

"Put it on." Colin ignored the painful twinge in his
heart.

She turned her back to him so he could fasten the
delicate chain. The heart nested at the cleft of her breasts, near
her own heart.

"I love it," she said leaning toward him to plant a
kiss on his lips.

"Good. I'm starved. Let's eat."

They tucked into their food leaving unspoken words
hanging in the air. Leah's negative reception of his declaration
kept him from saying the "L" word, though it was on the tip of his
tongue. Though the food filled his stomach and nourished his body,
his heart needed mending.

When they finished the stew, he refilled their
glasses and they sat back on the sofa.

"So
now
can you tell me where we're going?"
Leah put her wine glass on the table.

"Stand Up and Laugh…comedy club around the corner."
Colin kept his gaze level with hers.

"Oh my God!" She covered her mouth with her hands and
leapt up from the sofa.

"Is that good?"

"I've been wanting to go there for ages…I'm dying to
go there! I love comedy clubs…how did you know?"

Colin beamed. "Lucky guess."

She hugged him. "I almost forgot!" Leah opened a
drawer in the coffee table and pulled out an envelope. She extended
it to him. "Happy Valentine's Day," she said, grinning.

Colin opened the envelope and found two tickets to a
Knicks game the next evening.

"Wow! How did you know I like the Knicks?"

"Lucky guess…a little birdy told me, to be
honest."

"Thank you," he said as he bent down to kiss her.
"You're coming with me, right?"

"Unless there's some other woman you'd rather
take."

"Get serious. What time shall I pick you up?"

They agreed upon a time then threw on their coats as
it was ten minutes until the comedy show was scheduled to
begin.

At nine-thirty, they staggered out into the cold
still laughing from the last joke. Leah took his hand, leading him
back to the apartment.

"Dessert…we didn't have time for dessert," she said,
taking a deep breath of frigid air.

They walked home laughing and talking about the show.
When they reached the building, Lance, the doorman tipped his
hat.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Lance," Leah said.

"Same to you, Missy. Looks like you got a winner this
time," he said, nodding at Colin.

Leah's cheeks pinked. With her head tucked down, she
ushered Colin through the door quickly and into the waiting
elevator. Colin draped his arm over Leah's shoulders as they rode
up in the elevator.

"At least Lance likes me," he chuckled.

****

The heat left Leah's cheeks when she opened the door
to the apartment. Colin took their coats freeing her to escape into
the kitchen. When she joined him in the living room, he was sitting
on the sofa. She put a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon on the table in
front of him.

"I know, I know, open it, right?"

She nodded with a chuckle and left the room. While he
was pouring the dark red liquid into two glasses, Leah returned
carrying dessert. A small flat dark chocolate cake with a squiggle
of whipped cream on top graced each plate.

"Molten chocolate cake," she said, placing a plate on
the table in front of Colin.

He took her hand when she finished, pulling her into
an embrace.

"You're the only dessert I want."

His lips sought hers. His tongue pressed for
admittance so she parted her lips.
He smells so damned good.
The comfort of his strong arms brought her peace and a sense of
safety. She relaxed into him, raising her tongue to meet his as
sparks ignited between them. Colin held her tighter, crushing her
breasts against his chest, his mouth insistent. Her arms slid over
his shoulders, her fingers gripped his muscles. Passion sucked her
breath away, making her almost lightheaded.
He's not going to
stop. You'll have to do it.

Leah forced herself away from him slowly. She stood
up, averting her gaze to avoid the questioning look in his
eyes.

"Why are you running away from me?"

"I'm not running. I'm…trying to keep this light." She
walked over to the window.

"Why? Is it because I don't have a ton of money like
the Wall Street guys you usually go out with?"

Leah's head snapped back as if he had slapped her.
"Of course not! Who told you I go out with Wall Street guys?"

"Come on, Leah. Stop dancing around me. What's going
on?"

Colin sat back and sipped his wine. His penetrating
gaze never left her face.

"I don't know what you mean."

"Yes, you do. You keep pushing me away…but not
completely. You come just close enough to tempt me, tantalize me
before you scamper away." He got up and moved next to her at the
window. "And I want to know why."

His warm breath caressed her neck. For a second she
closed her eyes, her senses taking over.
He's right. He nailed
it.

"It's just that I don't feel…we're too far
apart…you're here, I'm going to Paris. There are too many things
against us, Colin. I don't want to hurt you and I don't want to get
hurt."

She raised her head to look straight into his eyes.
Smoldering desire burned there behind a flash of anger. The window
sill provided an anchor she grabbed onto as her knees weakened.

"Why don't you give us a chance? You went out with
those rich guys…give a poor guy a chance."

"Those rich guys? They're not so great. You want to
know about my life before, do you?"

"I do. Take your time."

"Maybe that will help you understand," she said,
retrieving her glass of wine then leaning against the wall.

"I'm listening."

"Sure, I went out with the Wall Street men. Looking
for a man like Hank. I thought I could find my dream with one of
them. But I was wrong. They all wanted a pretty companion on their
arms…in their beds but no more. They were committed to their
careers with no place for a commitment to me. So after having my
heart broken a few times, I figured out the game. I learned how to
play… but on my terms. I took what I wanted from each of them, and
then I moved on…before they did."

Colin sat quietly, listening. He took a mouthful of
wine, averting his gaze to his glass for a moment before facing
her. She looked at him expectantly. "You're not doing that with
me."

"You noticed?" She laughed. "You're different."

"Oh?" he cocked an eyebrow at her.

"In a good way."

He smiled. "So what do you want from me?"

She turned to face the wall. "Friendship."

"Ouch! No one who kisses like you do is looking for
only friendship."

Leah heard the hurt and disbelief in his voice and
whirled around to face him.

"You don't want me at all?" He asked.

"You're confusing me—I didn't say that I-I—" she
stammered.

"I don't believe you. What happened with Hank? What
happened to your dream?" Colin sipped his wine while watching
her.

"I guess you have a right to know." She slumped down
on the plush bench near the window.

Colin sat forward, listening.

"Hmm, my dream, remember?"

He nodded.

"We were living on Park Avenue South, in a beautiful
apartment overlooking the Avenue. Hank had been made vice
president. It was my turn, time for my dream. We found a house in
Connecticut, not far from Delia, Carrie's aunt. We put down a
deposit and signed a contract, then threw away my birth control
pills. I'd never been happier. One day, Hank prepared to go out
running. I secretly suspected I was pregnant. So I did the home
pregnancy test when he went out."

She took a deep breath then a gulp of wine. Tears
stung the backs of her eyes. Colin got up and moved to her side,
placing his hand on her shoulder.

"Sure enough, I was pregnant. I went to the window to
wave him in. I was so excited. That's when it happened." Her voice
cracked, a shudder rocketed through her body. Colin squeezed her
shoulder.

"Take your time," he whispered.

"When I was at the window, I saw it...a taxi coming
up Park Avenue too fast, then an idiot trying to zip across
38
^th
Street. There was a crash as the cab hit the front
of the car and began to spin up the sidewalk, right toward Hank,
who was running. The taxi uprooted a tree and flung it plus a metal
garbage can up the sidewalk so fast Hank couldn't get out of the
way in time. I saw the garbage can knock him flat…" she paused, her
breathing unsteady.

Colin snaked his arm around her shoulders and pulled
her into his embrace. Her hands shook as she tried to compose
herself.

"Then the cab came sliding up the sidewalk
sideways…so fast…so fast…over him, crushing him…it was horrible."
Tears cascaded down her cheeks as she struggled to catch her
breath. Colin pulled her closer, wrapping his other arm around
her.

"And you saw all this?"

She nodded unable to speak.

He held her close as she buried her face into his
shirt.

"My God, how awful…tragic…" he murmured.

Leah closed her arms around his middle and sobbed
into his chest. When he noticed her wiping her cheeks with her
hands, he offered her his handkerchief.

"I know it's been a long time…but I still dream about
it."

"You can't expect to forget an experience like that."
Colin smoothed her hair down.

She sank down on a bench, staring at nothing.

"Two weeks later, I miscarried."

"Shit! Leah…"

Colin hid his face with his hand and sighed as he
joined her on the bench. Rubbing her back brought a small smile to
her face.

"That was my dream. Since I can't have that dream, I
have another…to be a Paris clothing designer."

She let out a breath before she leaned against
him.

"I'm off to Paris. I don't know how long I'll be
there."

He held her.

"Even if we could ignore our age difference…"

"I don't care about any age difference between
us."

"…I don't see a future for us. That's what you want,
a future, and I can't promise one."

Silence fell over them like a soft blanket.
I
wish, I wish, sweet man.
Leah moved up against his chest as he
rested his cheek on her hair. She fisted his shirt in one hand,
holding onto him.
Stay like this a little longer.
Absorbing
strength from him, she relaxed. Peace settled over Leah, calming
her. The loving protection of Colin's embrace healed a piece of her
broken heart.

"I want you any way I can have you…for however long
that may be. I'm willing to take the risk. If you leave me because
you're following your dream, it won't be as bad as not having you
at all, not being together at least for a little while," Colin
said. "Women like you don't come along every day."

His hard chest invited her touch. Her fingers wrapped
around his bicep, noting the firmness of the muscle there. She
heard his heartbeat, smelled the aroma of spicy aftershave mixed
with his masculine scent and the clean smell of his freshly ironed
shirt…a heady combination. Desire grew in her loins.
Need…want…trust came together to break down the wall of her
resistance. She felt tingly all over.

"But…if you don't want me, I'll leave now and not
bother you again." Colin sat back, releasing her.

"How could I not want you? You're…amazing…gorgeous,
sexy…smart…sweet, oh so sweet."

He brought his mouth down on hers in a hungry kiss.
Leah opened her lips. He took her mouth, his tongue coaxing,
teasing, seducing her. Heat began to run through her veins. In an
attempt to refuse to give in to her growing passion for him, Leah
pushed away to walk a few steps toward the sofa. Colin came up
behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and bent down to
whisper in her ear.

"I want you so much. Let me touch you, let me love
you, Leah."

The magic word, love.
All resistance gone,
Leah let her head fall back on his shoulder. With eyes closed, she
muttered her assent. Colin's lips trailed up and down the column of
her neck as his hands moved up slowly to close over her breasts. At
his touch, she groaned.

"I want you…God, Colin…make love to me…" she
breathed.

He picked her up in his arms and carried her into the
bedroom, laying her down gently on the bed. She rolled over on her
stomach and shot him a sexy look. Colin ripped his tie off and
unbuttoned his shirt before leaning over to unzip her dress. Leah
sat up when he joined her on the bed. Before sliding her dress
down, she pushed the shirt off his shoulders. He ripped his t-shirt
over his head and tossed it on a chair.

A small noise escaped his throat when he eased her
dress down, exposing her black lace demi-bra. The heat of his gaze
warmed her bared flesh. He reached around and unsnapped the bra.
The garment fell. Her hands brushed through the hair on his chest
while his hands found her breasts.

"You are more beautiful than I imagined." As he
stared at her, fire flickered in his light eyes.

Warmed by his words as well as his hands, Leah pulled
him down for a kiss. She fell back and he landed on top of her,
bracing himself with his hands. He bent his head to kiss her
breasts while her fingers unbuckled his belt. When she unzipped his
pants, he pushed away from her, quickly shedding his pants and
boxers. Turning back to the bed his jaw dropped when he saw all she
was wearing was a skimpy pair of black lace bikini panties, having
shed her dress.

"May I?" He asked, reaching down.

She nodded. He hooked his fingers into the sides of
the panties and slid them down slowly, following their path with
his eyes. When she pushed them off, he knelt on the bed and
murmured.

"Magnificent…wow."

Heat crept up her neck into her cheeks. Her gaze
roamed over his body.