Read The Club Sin Series 4-Book Bundle Online
Authors: Stacey Kennedy
The door behind Cora remained wide open. She watched Aidan as if he were a ghost scaring the living shit out of her. This he hadn't intended.
Christ
, these past weeks he'd been trying to make everything better for her.
While his muscles itched to go to her, he forced himself to stay in his chair. His needs and wants weren't important right now. “I know you're surprised, but I asked Kyler and Porter to keep tonight a secret. I didn't want you to worry or stress on the drive here.” When she didn't move and awkward silence settled in, Aidan added, “You can come in and close the door.”
Cora stared at him for a long moment before she shut the door. She didn't approach and her glossy gaze held his. “Why are you here?” Her voice shook as her gaze drifted over the living room. “Whose house is this?”
“It's my house,” he replied with a soft voice, watching her carefully.
She blinked. “You never told me that you owned a home in Mount Charleston. I thought you owned a house in Summerlin.”
He agreed with a nod. “I still have the house in Vegas, but I've put it up for sale. I bought this place a week ago.” He smiled. “I thought it suited me better and that it was time for a change.”
Cora gave a slight shake of her head. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because I'm ready to talk now.”
She approached cautiously and stopped only a foot away. Her hands hung loosely at her sides and she drew in ragged breaths. A single tear ran down her cheek as she dropped to her knees. “Ready to talk about what?”
He drew in her spicy scent and desire curled through him. Weeks he'd been without that intoxicating aroma. His cock hardened under fierce need for her. A sense of rightness overtook him. His body ached to be connected to her. His heart reached to hold her.
Not yet
.
He'd prepared for this night, thinking over every moment and each word he would say. Now, with Cora there and with the swell of emotion, his mind went blank. He couldn't find the
right words or the perfect thing to say to her to fix what he'd done.
Words could never fix this; only action could repair the damage.
Aidan cursed the way her eyebrows squished together. He didn't want to cause her any more pain or confusion. He wanted to ensure she never hurt again. With his focus on that purpose, he turned to the box on the dark wide-plank floor and pushed it toward her. “Look through that.”
She scooted forward on her knees and peeked inside the box. With a gasp, she lifted her head and touched her parted lips. He nodded in understanding of her surprise. “That's my life with Lily.”
Cora watched him, not even breathing. “Why do you want me to look at this?”
“Because I need you to,” he murmured.
He couldn't hide from her any longer. Cora had given all of herself to him, without ever asking for anything in return. She needed to know him, all the little pieces that made him who he was. For her, he had faced his demons. To understand him, she needed to hear about the demons that consumed his life.
Cora regarded him and her gaze clouded, going distant. After a gulp, she grabbed out the picture frame that Aidan had kept of Lily in the kitchen. He studied Cora's face as she looked to the photo. Her eyes softened with her smile. “Lily was very pretty. She looks happy in this picture.”
Though a pang thumbed his heart, he managed, “She was happy.”
Cora peeked up through her long lashes, her gaze softened. “Aidan, this hurts you. Why do you want me to look at this?”
“Because I hurt you.” He shifted in his seat, his muscles rigid. “I need you to understand Lily.” Cora had protected him from the torment of his past. Tonight, he faced what haunted him.
Her teary eyes searched his before she sighed dejectedly. “Okay.” She placed the picture frame on the floor next to the box and pulled out the photo album of Aidan and Lily's monthlong trip to Europeâa trip that had been filled with laughter, love, and adventure.
“Europe,
hmm
?” Cora flipped through the pages. “I'm jealous.” She studied each picture in the way he expected from Coraâ¦carefully. She took her time and Aidan wondered over what she thought of when she looked at him holding Lily or posing with her in front of well-known sights.
After a few more flips of the pages, she lifted her head with beaming eyes. “Tell me about your trip.”
Aidan smiled softly. While some women would be bothered, Cora seemed more focused on Aidan's experience. Why hadn't he seen that before? All the questions she'd asked over the years had been done in a cautious way, never to dig too deep or be too personal and obvious, but she asked enough to know him better. “Lily and I had worked a case that was especially hard on her, because it involved a child.”
He remembered how long Lily slept after that case, and the dark circles beneath her eyes. “We went there to unwind and reconnect.” He looked to the picture of Lily standing in the bustling flea markets. “She loved Athens.” At the memory of her rushing around and buying silly little things and then getting drunk later, he grinned at Cora. “She especially enjoyed the taverns.”
“She sounds like my kinda gal.” Cora laughed.
Aidan nodded. “You would have liked her, I'm sure of that.” In fact, they were a lot similar, only Lily hadn't been as humorous as Cora. She had an old soul. Cora, though, beamed with an inner glow that brightened his life. She made him laugh, and that had been exactly what he needed during his dark days.
After she flipped the page, he said, “In that next picture, we spent the day visiting all the ruins⦔ Lost in thoughts of Lily, Aidan spent the next hour sharing story after story about their life. He went through all the special moments behind the pictures. He shared what made their relationship what it was, and why it'd been so hard for him when Lily had died.
By the time the box was empty and everything was all in a pile, Cora heaved a sigh. She picked up the original picture of Lily, and Aidan knew why she was drawn to that picture. It was his favorite of Lily, too. Lily hadn't known he had taken the picture that day at a picnic for a fund-raiser with his law firm, but she'd been laughing.
The picture had captured Lily's soul.
Cora ran her fingers over the picture before she placed the frame in her lap. Her features were gentle, as was her voice. “I'm sorry you lost her, Aidan.”
He shook his head slowly, resting his arms on his legs. “That's not why I showed you this.” He paused, forgetting everything he had planned to say. He spoke from his heart. “I showed you this so you'd understand what I had. I need you to feel that helplessness I felt when
she died.” He scrubbed his hand over his face, avoiding her gaze. “I had to accept that in a world where all I crave is control, that one time I had none.”
“Aidan.”
At her shaky voice, he lowered his hand, stared into her teary eyes, and added, “Her death gutted me. Yes, losing Lily was the worst thing I've ever been through.” He looked to his feet, forcing the words out of his tight throat. “But to add to that, I suffered because I had failed her. I should have been there. I should have protected her the night of the car accident.”
Aidan sensed Cora approaching before her hand pressed gently against his arm. “How could you have? It
was
an
accident
.”
“I couldn't. That is the logical answer.” A painful tightness formed in his chest as he lifted his head. He gazed into her crystal clear eyes and scanned over her splotchy skin. “The Dom in me didn't like that answer. It went against everything I believe in and all the morals that define me as a Dom.” Her touch on his arm carried warmth into his icy veins. “Do you understand that?”
Cora regarded him and then gave a small nod. “Actually, that makes a lot of sense. It would be like a submissive craving to submit but being unable to.”
Of course she understood. He'd done exactly that to her. He wouldn't spend his time regretting that. He would do his best to ensure she never felt that way again. He raised his hand, brushing his finger against her cheek. “Then there was you⦔ He slid his thumb across her lip, which parted under his touch. “You changed everything. Your submission not only brought me happiness, but it healed the part of me that craves control.”
She leaned into his touch, a slow smile rising to her face. “You gave me something, too, you know.”
He hesitated, grasping her chin. “What did I give you?”
A tear escaped her eye. “Hope.”
Aidan shut his eyes, overwhelmed by
this
woman. For all they'd been through that one answer told him all he needed to know. Cora's love held no restraints. It didn't matter what they'd been through. It didn't matter that he'd hurt her. She broke because he rejected her. Now that he welcomed her, Cora could forgive him.
To be okay and feel safe, she needed him.
He undeniably needed her, too.
If only he'd realized that a lot sooner.
Aidan forced all the negativity for what he'd done away. Pain and regret had destroyed him for too long. Cora deserved the good parts of him. She'd dealt enough with his pain. He swiped away the moisture on her cheek, reveling in her soft skin. “All of this has been fear. It's weakness. I didn't want to fail you.” He swallowed the thick emotion, hiding nothing from the one woman who had given all of herself. “But I did anyway, didn't I?”
Her chin trembled. “You did.”
“I know an apology can never say enough to overcome what I've done to you, but I am sorry, Cora. I'm sorry that I made you hide and feel as though you couldn't tell me the truth. That is all on me.”
From this night forward, he never wanted to see the hurt he witnessed in her puffy red eyes now. He slid both hands up her neck, cupping her face. “I'm sorry I let you walk away at the cemetery. I should have tugged you back in my arms and told you all this then.”
In classic Cora style, her mouth down-turned, spilling more tears from her eyes. “I don't need you to be sorry, Aidan. I need you to do better.”
Didn't that sum it up?
His pulse quickened and his muscles tensed, under the spell she'd woven over him. “It's not that I never cared about you. Our connection, Cora”âhe shook his head, consumed by the heady emotion swirling within himâ“it was all so real it blindsided me.” He caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, forcing out what he should've admitted a long time ago. “But I had to accept my weaknesses and my failures. As a Dom⦔
“That's hard to do,” she offered.
“Extremely hard.” He watched her furtively, gripping her face tight. “I'm sorry you've struggled these past weeks. I wish it didn't have to be that way, but I needed to be ready before we talked.” He leaned down close, looking her head-on. “You don't need to hear words. You needed to see that I'm ready for this.” He hesitated, allowing her a moment to process before he added, “I didn't want to make you a promise I couldn't keep.”
She held his stare with strong contact, not blinking. “What promise?”
Consumed by her soulâa soul he'd never hurt again, he drew in a long breath before he said, “My promise of a fresh start. A promise that I will take care of you in the same manner you've taken care of me for the last two years.” He brushed more tears away and smiled gently.
“I can't live without you, Cora, of that I'm sure.”
Her breath hitched. “Well, I'll be damned.”
“That's not quite what I expected you to say.” He frowned.
She smirked. “It's about time you freaking said how much you need me and how incredible wonderful I am.”
Aidan chuckled. Of course, Cora wouldn't focus on any part of his pain, wouldn't make him relive it. She already knew his demons and understood them. She did what she always didâmade his life a little easier and a whole lot better. “You always knew, did you?”
He gaze sparkled. “Guess I need to remind you what I've told you before.” She took his hands and lifted her chin, exposing her long neck calling for his tongue to lick it. “I see you.” She winked. “Flaws included.”
He dragged his finger up her neck, studying her slight shiver. “But you love me anyway?”
“What can I say?” She gave a halfhearted shrug. “No one's perfect, certainly not me.”
“Now
that
I don't agree with. You are
Cora
, and there is nothing more perfect than that.” He grasped her chin, angling it so her gaze was level with his. “I love you.”
“I never doubted you didâI only doubted that you'd accept it.” Her eyes shined with tears at his latter admission before she blatted her lashes. “And you're rightâI'm pretty great.”
He laughed, inclining his head in agreement. Hearing her sass meant so much more than amusement. It meant one truthâCora wasn't good unless she had him, exactly as he had felt these weeks without her.
Now that he'd come back into her life, she was better. Such a simple thing, but it held a world of meaning to a Dom. His submissive had dropped without him. He'd never let her fall again.
While it pleased him she was so accepting of this, he couldn't misread her anymore. “For how you left me at the cemetery and the reaction you gave under my touch in our last scene, I wasn't expecting this to go over this well.”
She smiled gently, leaning up toward him. “You're finally saying the right things. You're touching me the right way.” Something so sweet and pure sped through the air between them as she added, “I love you, Aidan. Yes, these weeks have been hell and horrible, but I'm done feeling bad. Thisâ¦
you
â¦it makes me happy. It's what I wanted. It's as simple as that.”
He could listen and observe her for hours, and he would admire her strength in the years ahead of them. Tonight he took his second chance at love and he wouldn't look back. He arched an arched eyebrow and smiled. “Simple just took a little bit though, didn't it?”