Read The Cinnamon Peeler Online
Authors: Michael Ondaatje
We clean buckets of their sand
to fetch water in the morning,
reach for winter cobwebs,
sweep up moths who have forgotten to waken.
When the children sleep, angled
behind their bottles, you can hear mice prowl.
I turn a page
careful not to break the rhythms
of your sleeping head on my hip,
watch the moving under your eyelid
that turns like fire,
and we have love and the god outside
until ice starts to limp
in brown hidden waterfalls,
or my daughter burns the lake
by reflecting her red shoes in it.
The car carried him
racing the obvious moon
beating in the trees like a white bird.
Difficult to make words sing
around your appendix.
The obvious upsets me,
everyone has scars which crawl
into the mystery of swimming trunks.
I was the first appendix in my family.
My brother who was given the stigma
of a rare blood type
proved to have ulcers instead,
The rain fell like applause as I approached the hospital.
It takes seven seconds she said,
strapped my feet,
entered my arm.
I stretched all senses
on
five
the room closed on me like an eyelid.
At night the harmonica plays,
a whistler joins in respect.
I am a sweating marble saint
full of demerol and sleeping pills.
A man in the armour of shining plaster
walks to my door, then past.
Imagine the rain
falling like white bees on the sidewalk
imagine Snyder
high on poetry and mountains
Three floors down
my appendix
swims in a jar.
O world, I shall be buried all over Ontario
for Bill Muysson
In his clean vegetation
the parrot, judicious,
poses on a branch.
The narrator of the scene,
aware of the perfect fruits,
the white and blue flowers,
the snake with an ear for music;
he presides.
The apes
hold their oranges like skulls,
like chalices.
They are below the parrot
above the oranges—
a jungle serfdom which
with this order
reposes.
They are the ideals of dreams.
Among the exactness,
the symmetrical petals,
the efficiently flying angels,
there is complete liberation.
The parrot is interchangeable;
tomorrow in its place
a waltzing man and tiger,
brash legs of a bird.
Greatness achieved
they loll among textbook flowers
and in this pose hang
scattered like pearls
in just as intense a society.
On Miss Adelaide Milton de Groot’s walls,
with Lillie P. Bliss in New York.
And there too
in spangled wrists and elbows
and grand façades of cocktails
are vulgarly beautiful parrots, appalled lions,
the beautiful and the forceful locked in suns,
and the slight, careful stepping birds.
Two birds loved
in a flurry of red feathers
like a burst cottonball,
continuing while I drove over them.
I am a good driver, nothing shocks me.
A girl whom I’ve not spoken to
or shared coffee with for several years
writes of an old scar.
On her wrist it sleeps, smooth and white,
the size of a leech.
I gave it to her
brandishing a new Italian penknife.
Look, I said turning,
and blood spat onto her shirt.
My wife has scars like spread raindrops
on knees and ankles,
she talks of broken greenhouse panes
and yet, apart from imagining red feet,
(a nymph out of Chagall)
I bring little to that scene.
We remember the time around scars,
they freeze irrelevant emotions
and divide us from present friends.
I remember this girl’s face,
the widening rise of surprise.
And would she
moving with lover or husband
conceal or flaunt it,
or keep it at her wrist
a mysterious watch.
And this scar I then remember
is medallion of no emotion.
I would meet you now
and I would wish this scar
to have been given with
all the love
that never occurred between us.
Men stopped in the heel of sun,
hum of engines evaporated;
the machine displayed itself bellied with mud
and balanced – immense.
No one ran to where
his tensed muscles curled unusually,
where jaws collected blood,
the hole in his chest the size of fists,
hands clutched to eyes like a blindness.
Arched there he made
ridiculous requests for air.
And twelve construction workers
what should they do but surround
or examine the path of falling.
And the press in bright shirts,
a doctor, the foreman scuffing a mound,
men. removing helmets,
the machine above him
shielding out the sun
while he drowned
in the dark orgasm of his mouth.
With the bleak heron Paris
imagine Philoctetes
the powerful fat-thighed man,
the bandaged smelling foot
with rivers of bloodshot veins
scattering like trails into his thighs:
a man who roared on an island for ten years,
whose body grew banal
while he stayed humane
behind the black teeth and withering hair.
Imagine in his hands – black
from the dried blood of animals,
a bow of torn silver
that noised arrows loose like a wild heart;
in front of him – Paris
darting and turning, the perfumed stag,
and beyond him the sun
netted in the hills, throwing back his shape,
until the running spider of shadow
gaped on the bandaged foot of the standing man
who let shafts of eagles into the ribs
that were moving to mountains.
Sun moves broken in the trees
drops like a paw
turns sea to red leopard
I trap sharks and drown them
stuffing gills with sand
cut them with coral till
the blurred grey runs
red designs.
And kill to fool myself alive
to leave all pity on the staggering body
in order not to shoot an arrow up
and let it hurl
down through my petalling skull
or neck vein, and lie
heaving round the wood in my lung.
That the end of thinking.
Shoot either eye of bird instead
and run and catch it in your hand.
One day a bird went mad
flew blind along the beach
smashed into a dropping wave
out again and plummeted.
Later knocked along the shore.
To slow an animal
you break its foot with a stone
so two run wounded
reel in the bush, flap
bodies at each other
till free of forest
it gallops broken in the sand,
then use a bow
and pin the tongue back down its throat.
With wind the rain wheels like a circus hoof,
aims at my eyes, rakes up the smell of animals
of stone moss, cleans me.
Branches fall like nightmares in the dark
till sun breaks up
and spreads wound fire at my feet
then they smell me,
the beautiful animals
Catch, my Uncle Jack said
and oh I caught this huge apple
red as Mrs Kelly’s bum.
It’s red as Mrs Kelly’s bum, I said
and Daddy roared
and swung me on his stomach with a heave.
Then I hid the apple in my room
till it shrunk like a face
growing eyes and teeth ribs.
Then Daddy took me to the zoo
he knew the man there
they put a snake around my neck
and it crawled down the front of my dress.
I felt its flicking tongue
dripping onto me like a shower.
Daddy laughed and said Smart Snake
and Mrs Kelly with us scowled.
In the pond where they kept the goldfish
Philip and I broke the ice with spades
and tried to spear the fishes;
we killed one and Philip ate it,
then he kissed me
with raw saltless fish in his mouth.
My sister Mary’s got bad teeth
and said I was lucky, then she said
I had big teeth, but Philip said I was pretty.
He had big hands that smelled.
I would speak of Tom, soft laughing,
who danced in the mornings round the sundial
teaching me the steps from France, turning
with the rhythm of the sun on the warped branches,
who’d hold my breast and watch it move like a snail
leaving his quick urgent love in my palm.
And I kept his love in my palm till it blistered.
When they axed his shoulders and neck
the blood moved like a branch into the crowd.
And he staggered with his hanging shoulder
cursing their thrilled cry, wheeling,
waltzing in the French style to his knees
holding his head with the ground,
blood settling on his clothes like a blush;
this way
when they aimed the thud into his back.
And I find cool entertainment now
with white young Essex, and my nimble rhymes.
She said, ‘What about Handy? Think I should send it to him?
’
‘
He’s supposed to call in a little while. I’ll ask him.
’
‘
He retired, didn’t he?
’
‘
Yes.
’
She waited and then said, ‘Say something, Parker. God to get you to gossip, it’s like pulling teeth.
’
‘
Handy retired.’ Parker said
.
‘
I know he retired! Tell me about it. Tell me why he retired, tell me where he is, how’s he doing. Talk to me, Parker, goddamit.
’
R
ICHARD STARK
,
The Sour Lemon Score
It becomes apparent that I miss great occasions.
My birth was heralded by nothing
but the anniversary of Winston Churchill’s marriage.
No monuments bled, no instruments
agreed on a specific weather.
It was a seasonal insignificance.
I console myself with my mother’s eighth month.
While she sweated out her pregnancy in Ceylon
a servant ambling over the lawn
with a tray of iced drinks,
a few friends visiting her
to placate her shape, and I
drinking the life lines,
Wallace Stevens sat down in Connecticut
a glass of orange juice at his table
so hot he wore only shorts
and on the back of a letter
began to write ‘The Well Dressed Man with a Beard’.
That night while my mother slept
her significant belly cooled
by the bedroom fan
Stevens put words together
that grew to sentences
and shaved them clean and
shaped them, the page suddenly
becoming thought where nothing had been,
his head making his hand
move where he wanted
and he saw his hand was saying
the mind is never finished, no, never
and I in my mother’s stomach was growing
as were the flowers outside the Connecticut windows.
‘
Even his jokes were exceedingly drastic.
’
My wife’s problems with husbands, houses,
her children that I meet
at stations in Kingston, in Toronto, in London Ontario
– they come down the grey steps
bright as actors after their drugged four hour ride
of spilled orange juice and comics.
Reunions for Easter egg hunts.
Kite flying. Christmases.
All this, I was about to say,
invades my virgin past.
When she was beginning
this anthology of kids
I moved – blind but for senses
jutting
faux pas
, terrible humour,
shifted with a sea of persons,
breaking when necessary
into smaller self sufficient bits of mercury.
My mind a carefully empty diary
till I hit the barrier reef
that was my wife—
there
the right bright fish
among the coral.
With her came the locusts of history—
innuendoes she had missed
varied attempts at seduction
dogs who had been bred
and killed by taxis or brain disease,
Here was I trying to live
with a neutrality so great
I’d have nothing to think about.
Nowadays I get the feeling
I’m in a complex situation,
one of several billboard posters
blending in the rain.
I am writing this with a pen my wife has used
to write a letter to her first husband.
On it is the smell of her hair.
She must have placed it down between sentences
and thought, and driven her fingers round her skull
gathered the slightest smell of her head
and brought it back to the pen.