The Cinderella Reflex (25 page)

“It’s a fantastic opportunity, Helene. Thank you so much for thinking of me. So, when would you like me to do it?”

She hesitated. She wanted to keep it under wraps for the competition.

“I’ll get back to you with all the details soon, yeah? Oh, and Matt? I’m having a birthday party shortly … and I was … er, wondering if you c-c-could come?” She found herself stammering. She had been brooding about Richard saying she only had a few friends. Her older sister, Zoey, lived in New Zealand with her grown-up family and Helene only ever saw her now on Skype. And she had allowed her circle of friends to gradually wither away while she was focussing all of her attention on Richard and Atlantic 1FM.

“I’d love to come – thanks so much for asking me.” Matt was positively ebullient now. “Is it a special birthday?”

“The big Four-O, I’m afraid,” she said, a bit shyly.

“
What?
I can’t believe you’re forty!”

“Flattery will get you everywhere!” she said, but she couldn’t stop smiling and, when she hung up the phone, she was alarmed to hear herself
humming.

The next phone call interrupted her good mood, however. It was from Paulina explaining how everyone needed to have their
It’s My Show
proposals in by the end of the week.

“It’s very short notice,” Helene pointed out. “I’m not sure if anyone will have their pitches perfected by then.”

“Well, Tess Morgan has been working hard on hers,” Paulina sniffed.

And then she relayed a bizarre story about Tess stalking Jack McCabe at a hotel where Paulina and Jack had been meeting with Ollie. Something about Tess pitching an elevator speech at Jack, in a bid to get her agony-aunt gig back.

Frankly, Helene found it difficult to believe that a mouse like Tess Morgan would have the imagination or the gumption to do any such thing. But then, why would Paulina make it up? When she hung up from the call, she squeezed her feet into her stilettos and went to find out more.

Sara saw her coming and covered her notebook with both hands. Helene smiled. She knew Sara was calling her pilot ‘
Sundays with Sara
’ and that Ollie, with an ego the size of a small planet, had hired an outside consultant to devise his proposal. And now Tess Morgan had used an elevator pitch. She wondered what Andrea was planning. She was out of the office today, supposedly researching a story, but Helene was sure she was using the time to work on her entry for
It’s My Show
. It was unbelievable the lengths people were willing to go to. Helene didn’t mind. She liked the competition.

“Listen up, everyone,” she announced. “The launch party for the new look Atlantic 1FM takes place in two weeks.”

Sara whipped her head around. “Really? That soon?”

“That soon – which means the deadline for your proposals is the end of this week. The winnerwill be announced at the relaunch party, apparently.” Helene waited for the cries of dismay to die down before adding, “So, good luck with them. May the best man – or woman – win!”

“It’s mine, Helene,” Ollie warned.

Helene’s mobile rang and she fished it out of her pocket. It was Paulina again.

“Hi, I forgot to say. We want to provide coaching for current staff who are pitching for
It’s My Show
– so can you set up a rota so I can see all of you as soon as possible?”

Helene frowned. “Why do you want to do that?”

“It’s standard management strategy. We want the people who don’t win the contest to still feel valued by the station. After all, they’re going to be working crazy hours to make the eventual winner into a household name. People are going to lots of trouble with their submissions, so it’s important they feel they are getting a fair crack of the whip. Especially if the gig eventually goes to an outsider.”

Helene’s antennae shot up. “Is an outsider in the frame to get it?”

“Not necessarily.” Paulina’s voice was soothing. “But I have to say it – we do have some pretty good external candidates.”

“Really?” Helene’s voice came out in a squeak.

“Really. So let the others know about the coaching, will you?”

“Okay.” Helene clicked off her mobile and suppressed a sigh. She wondered why Paulina, who had never worked in a radio station in her life, thought she could offer the rest of them coaching advice.

“What was that about?” Ollie asked.

“Er … Paulina is setting up coaching sessions for all the contest entrants working here.” Helene was still trying to figure out if there was some ulterior motive behind it.

“Coaching? What will that involve?” Sara asked.

“I’ve no idea. I presume Paulina will go over your proposal with you, give you a chance to enhance it in some way. Would you like me to look over it with you first, Sara?”

“No thanks, I’d rather keep it private.”

“What about you, Tess? Would you like me to go over your proposal before Paulina arrives? Apparently it’s mandatory that we all attend.”

“No thanks.” Tess didn’t look up from her computer screen.

“What are you working on – another elevator speech?” Helene looked over Tess’s shoulder.

“A what?” Ollie’s head jerked up.

“Haven’t you heard? Apparently, Tess here stalked Jack and Paulina to pitch them her idea that she should have a second chance at the agony-aunt slot. In some hotel in Dublin.”

Ollie’s eyes narrowed. “I met Jack and Paulina at a hotel in Dublin. Was it there?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Tess muttered.

But Helene had already seen a crimson rash creeping up her throat.

“Oh, you can’t leave us in the dark like that!” she taunted.

“I can, actually!” Tess suddenly blazed. “I’ve said I don’t want to talk about it, so just leave it at that. And, while I’m at it, will everyone please shut up about this stupid contest! It’s all anyone has talked about since I’ve come back and I am completely sick of it. I’m trying to get some work done here.”

“Okay, no need to bite my head off!” Helene backed off, suddenly remembering how kind Tess had been yesterday after she’d fainted. She didn’t think she would have been so magnanimous herself in the circumstances.

She walked towards Richard’s office, hoping he could tell her more about the coaching. But even though the door was ajar, his chair was empty. She turned to leave but then remembered what he’d said about the proposals for
It’s My Show
piling up on his desk. Cautiously, she stepped into the office and, sure enough, there they were – stacks of submissions scattered about carelessly where Richard had thrown them.

Helene didn’t hesitate. She had taught herself years ago to speed-read – a skill she had found extremely useful during her career, enabling her to read other people’s private information with ease. She leaned over now, intent on scanning through as many of the rival proposals as she could. But the sudden movement made her dizzy and she stood back up sharply. She put her hand to her mouth, aware of the by-now-familiar sensation of retching rising up from her stomach. She turned and ran from the office, barely making it to the Ladies’ before throwing up.

Afterwards, she leaned against the white bathroom sink, staring at her ashen complexion and the uncertainty in her eyes. She couldn’t go on like this. She was scared stiff but she knew now she had to find out whether she was pregnant or not. As soon as possible.

Chapter Seventeen

She stood in front of the mirror, her head to one side as she considered her reflection. She was wearing an eye-wateringly expensive set of lingerie, but it wasn’t the oyster silk bra and panties that Helene’s eyes were trained on. She folded her hands across her belly, hardly able to believe it. She was actually pregnant.

She had finally worked up the courage to use the pregnancy test, just two days ago, and the result had changed everything. The idea of travelling the world with Richard was ridiculous now they were expecting a baby. There were other considerations to ponder – moving to a bigger place maybe, somewhere with a garden.

She’d felt as if she were inhabiting a surreal, parallel universe, but as soon as she knew she was positively, definitely pregnant, the panic had been replaced by the sure, calm knowledge that this was where she was meant to be in her life right now. Sometimes, the strange sensation of living in a twilight zone would return. Today, while one part of her was rushing around, getting ready for her party, another, deeper part was pondering how her whole world was about to change.

When she was clearing out her fridge to make room for the caterers she’d been shocked at the contents – a bottle of white wine, a black banana and a half-empty carton of milk. And the urgent necessity to upgrade her diet was only the start of it. How would she manage her long working days with a baby in tow – especially now that Richard wouldn’t be there to smooth the way for her? How was she going to find the words to tell him, without him freaking out?

But at other odd times, sheer elation stole over her. Like now, as she stood in her underwear, her mouth curved upwards in a smile. Long ago she had accepted that she had probably forfeited her chance to become a mother – another unfortunate consequence of falling for a married man. And then out of the blue, it had happened. Helene had given up trying to figure out how it had occurred. Even Richard must realise there was no foolproof birth control. What was it her grandmother used to say about unplanned pregnancies? “
Sometimes nature makes fools of us all.
”

Her eyes strayed to the clock. She had better get a move on. Her guests were due to arrive and she wanted to look her best. She fingered the red silk dress she had bought for the occasion. It was a knockout, folding cleverly over her stomach – she hadn’t a clue about when she might start to show – and clinging to her curves. Her boobs were definitely fuller, she thought, leaning forward to inspect her cleavage. And her complexion had a new, luminous quality to it that made her look different. Softer, maybe?

Helene smiled a secret smile, pulled the dress over her head and slipped on her heels. She gave herself a last spritz of scent, tossed her hair over her shoulders and wandered into the living room. The party planners Richard had hired had arrived earlier to create what they had called “an atmosphere of discreet luxury”. Expensive flower arrangements of red roses and white gypsophila were dotted around the room and a couple of silver champagne buckets held the celebratory fizz. There was just one balloon with the figure 40 on it floating in a corner, almost hidden behind her silver standard lamp. Lauren, the boss of the party-planning company, had explained they would be back tonight to serve the food and drink.

“If you give me a key we can clear up tomorrow while you’re in work,” she offered. “By the time you get back it will be as if you’d never had a party at all.”

Helene found it a little bit sad that all the evidence of her big night would be cleared away so soon. But then, she consoled herself, she could have all the big parties she wanted in the future. Big, showyparties. She and Richard couldn’t be discreet about their affair when she was as big as a house, after all, or when they had a little baby to rear together.

But would Richard still be around when she was big as a house? One part of her, the logical, rational part she was most familiar with, had to concede that there was a distinct possibility that he would not. Look at how he had reacted when she’d suggested they go travelling together – something about how he couldn’t leave his “children”.

But since she discovered she was pregnant, Helene had discovered a different part of herself, a part she didn’t recognise and was slightly alarmed by, a part that was ridiculously optimistic and vulnerable all at the same time. And it was this part that whispered to her now that Richard loved her, as he’d told her often enough. And the one thing she could never fault him on was his role as a father. His devotion to David and Anna had been a source of constant conflict between them, but now, in this new situation, Helene thought that it wasn’t such a bad flaw in a man after all. Because this new baby of hers was his baby too. That in itself was bound to change his level of commitment to her.

A movement behind her made her look up. Richard had arrived. She caught her breath at the sight of him. He was wearing a navy work suit but he’d pulled off his tie and his white shirt was unbuttoned. The tiredness which had dogged him for the past few months had vanished.

“Happy birthday, baby!” he called out, positively carefree.

Helene slipped easily into his embrace. “Thank you. I’m glad you’re the first to arrive – it’s nice to have some time alone.”

“You look wonderful!”

He pulled her closer to him and, as she buried her face in his chest, she felt all the stress of the past few weeks leave her. Everything was going to be all right, she thought, breathing in the Richard smell – a mix of aftershave and masculinity – that made her feel safe.

“
So, what will you have to drink? Champagne, I presume?” He gently released her and went over to pick up a bottle.

“I’m okay for now.” Helene gestured vaguely to the glass of sparkling water on the coffee table. “You have some, though.”

“Water?” Richard frowned slightly. “You’re not feeling ill again, are you? Maybe you should get the doc to check you out?”

“Maybe I will.”

He poured himself a glass of bubbly and placed it on the coffee table. Then he slouched onto the sofa, interlacing his hands behind his head, a reminiscent smile on his face. “The only time Louisa didn’t want champagne was when she was pregnant,” he joked.

Helene turned away. She’d go into the kitchen, or the bedroom, somewhere she could escape from this conversation. But she wasn’t quick enough.

“Helene?”

She looked back at him and saw he was now sitting bolt upright.

He stared at her. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”

She thought briefly about lying. But now that Richard’s suspicions were aroused she knew she couldn’t placate him with some flimsy story, even if she could think up one in the next few seconds. Besides, he had to know sometime.