The Chronicles of Heaven's War: Burning Phoenix (56 page)

Darla was surprised, hesitating before she
spoke. “Of… of course, I trust you. I love you.” Lowenah caught
Darla’s troubled glance along with the deceitful tone carried on
the girl’s reply. She took her daughter’s hand, nodding. “Love me?
Yes, I do believe you do, but your tongue speaks a falsehood
regarding your trust.”

Darla began to object. Lowenah stopped her.
“You cannot fool the Maker of Worlds with smooth speech unless she
wishes to be fooled. I do not wish to be
fooled
this day.
Too painful a matter it is to recall times long passed when my
heart desired such things, only to bring a ruination upon all
flesh.”

Taking hold of Darla’s hands while peering
deeply into distraught eyes, Lowenah asked, “My child of the
evening, last of the CherBulocks, I know you love me and a loyal
love it is, it is. Yet in your hour of contest with the Snake, when
our eyes locked for but a moment, I witnessed the look of betrayal
in your stare - not your betrayal of me as your eyes bore into my
soul, but of
my
betrayal of
you
, for secrets withheld
that now your worst enemy revealed.”

Darla shook her head saying it was not
so.

Lowenah sputtered, “
Don’t lie to me or to
yourself!
I ask you now, and be truthful to the point of death.
Do you have
faith
in me?” “Have
faith
in you?!” Darla
had not expected such a question and did not know what to say. She
was preparing to ask what a CherBulock was, having never heard the
word before. Now that was all forgotten. She cried,
“Mother, I
love you!”

Lowenah frowned. “Rachel, do you have
faith
in me?” Feeling like an animal caught in a trap, Darla
shook her head, squirming in desperation. “I do not know a thing at
all! Mother, I love you and will do anything for you. I hate the
Evil Worm with all my heart and soul. Is that not faith
enough?!”

Still holding her daughter’s hand, Lowenah
turned her face away, shaking her head sadly. “It is not enough, my
Rachel, to love me. Many are the ones who have loved me, or at
least the deities contrived that claim to represent me. Yet those
very people have done and do the most abhorrent things in my name,
deceiving themselves and others that they are doing my will. Love
alone does not curb the evil, but only stokes the fires of holiness
to cover the wickedness being done in my name.”

She looked back into Darla’s face. “My
daughter, Ilaniya, loves me to the point of death, but does not
understand me, know me. She surrenders her soul up to the service
of that Evil Snake because she has been shamed by her own heart
into believing that the confessions of her loyalties under duress
and severe torture have condemned her to everlasting damnation.
Love has not saved her from the upcoming, unspeakable sufferings
she will receive at the hands of that man. Yes, because of that
same tricksy love for me, rescue she rejected.”

“Now for hate...” Lowenah looked down at her
hands. “It has been said to ‘hate the bad and love the good’, and
it is a correct statement, but also tricksy for those easily
deceived. For if the bad is whitewashed to appear less evil,
possibly good or just not bad, will doing what is good be such an
easy thing? If two roads - one smooth and flat, the other narrow,
winding and steep - are believed to deliver one to the same
destination, which one will the carefree and thoughtless
choose?”

“ ‘Shrewd is the person seeing the calamity
afar off and conceals himself from it.’ Wise words, true, but how
does one become
shrewd
if he or she lacks the wisdom to see
the calamity or has no ability to ward it off? My Rachel, it is by
faith
and
trust
that one wards off the coming blow.
Faith and trust in what? In someone able to
protect
them
from the calamity...”

Lowenah sat back, again looking into Darla’s
eyes. “Now should a man come to a forked road, the one smooth and
the other tempestuous, and should a trustworthy innkeeper warn him
that highwaymen lurk down the smooth road, it might well be an easy
thing to take the other more troublesome road. What, though, would
be the case if the same innkeeper merely warned the man to stick to
the tempestuous highway, giving no explanation? How easy would it
be for the man, burdened down with many trade goods to follow the
innkeeper’s advice if he had little or no trust and faith in the
fellow?”

“Only by faith and trust would such an
endeavor be made. And should the decision be to follow the easy
road, and the traveler was to fall in among highwaymen, would he
have the right to feel betrayed because the innkeeper did not tell
him why it was not wise to take that road?”

Not yet understanding the moral of the
story, but answering the question as best she could, Darla replied,
“The innkeeper was not under obligation to warn the traveler at
all, he not having been placed under the servitude of that man. So
any warning, great or small, should be considered a gift. The
treasonous act, then, would be committed by the traveler, himself,
for ignoring the trustworthy warning.”

Lowenah smiled again. “So, then, the
traveler need not have any love for the innkeeper to heed his
warning, true? Indeed, it mattered little if that had been the
case. What he needed were two other things that neither love nor
hate could replace - faith and trust. Had the traveler only one
thing, either trust or faith in that the highwaymen might lie in
wait down the smooth road, he would have chosen the twisting road,
considering it to be the safer of the two.”

“And another question... Had the traveler
known and loved the innkeeper, but did not trust him, thus had no
faith in the man’s warning, would love have saved the traveler from
falling in amongst thieves?” Darla shook her head, saying
nothing.

Leaning close and tenderly kissing her
child, Lowenah crooned and then asked, “I know that you love me
with all your heart, yet what would your outcome have been if your
passionate hatred for the Evil Snake had not been so great? Would
you have gone with him even after my warnings to be wary concerning
his smooth words and treacherous ways? Was it only
hatred
that saved you that day?”

Darla did not want to answer, it hurting too
much to think of herself as a foolish waif, having almost taken a
road that might well have led to her damnation. She finally spoke
up. “Mother, I do not know if I have faith or not. Making you happy
has been my greatest concern…” She lowered her gaze toward the
floor. “that is, until I felt as if betrayed by you. Then the hurt
from love betrayed burned so badly within me, I wished only to
leave this place and never live again.”

Looking back into her mother’s face,
wide-eyed, Darla asked, “What does faith feel like? If I have it, I
must feel it in some way, shouldn’t I?”

Lowenah laughed. “Do not speak as though the
suckling
to me. You are a grown girl and know well such
definitions. I will say this once, succinctly as may be, and you
can do with it as you will.
Faith, my dear, is the engine that
continues to drive our lives after all hope is gone.
Your
friend, Paul, defined it long ago for the people of his Realm. It
has been a motivating force in that world down to this day.”

“Faith cannot stand the bulwark alone. Trust
is its ally. The two are inseparable, yet both different, one
complementing the other. You see, one must trust
first
.
Without trust, you will not step on Destiny’s road to begin your
journey. Oh, and there are so many things you must trust about the
person or persons encouraging you to take that road.”

“Once you have taken to the road with trust,
you must ally yourself with faith if you wish to make a success of
your journey. Faith leads you to action, motivating you to stick to
your path because faith will give you insight, rejuvenate hope, to
see afar off the promised reward of journey’s end. So it is that
trust and faith will deliver you to hope, thus with faith and hope,
you will successfully endure whatever the fated road may deliver
upon you until the reality of your endeavors has been
experienced.”

Darla spoke up in her own defense. “
Then
I do have faith!
I see, have seen afar off the hope we all
attain for. That is why I have lifted up my sword to do battle with
the wicked one, to bring to a finish the evil in this world.”

Lowenah agreed. “And a good soldier you have
proved to be, brave and fearless, a sterling example for others to
follow.” She then shook her head. “But it has not been out of the
faith that I speak of you having done such things. No, my dear
Rachel. Child, your faith is, always has been based on the trust of
your own hand. You have a great deal of faith in
YOU
, but
little to none in others…
including me
.”

Darla was shocked. “That is not so! I trust
you! I do! I do!”

Lowenah hushed her. “Your faith is in your
might! Strong-willed you are, a powerful woman, keen of mind and
fleet of foot. Your sword is deadly and aim is sure, but it has
been by faith in your own willpower that you have forged
ahead.”

“But I
have
relied upon you!” Darla
whined. “
Many
times I have cried out to you for
assistance!”

Wagging a finger, Lowenah countered, “And
many times I have responded to my little child’s pleadings. Yet it
was out of desperation, when all hope in your own might was
departed, that you called out to me. Never have you beseeched me
before the battle, requesting my presence to be with you in the
contest. Always, when your strength has waned and your countenance
fallen have you reached out to me. Yes, my dear one, only when all
other hope was finished did you reach out for my hand.” She shook
her head sadly. “So, so much like the others are you. Yes, you are
not the only one forgetting me until no other hope exists.”

Darla began to cry, whimpering, “How do you
tolerate such an evil child, a misfit urchin of evil times, a Che…
Cher… CherBulock?”

Lowenah laughed. “I have already said too
much for inquisitive ears. Only of my lessons shall I speak. Evil
you are not. Urchin? Well, there are times. Look, I created my
children to be free, independent agents. It takes conscious effort
to call out to me, the very nature of going it your own way being
so strong within you. But times have changed since the carefree
days. Trust and faith, not in ourselves, but in the powers that can
remove evil from the universe are what must be cultivated now.”

“Listen and gain understanding. It was not
the trust and faith the traveler had in himself that saved him from
the highwaymen. The traveler lacked any knowledge of those dangers.
Trust and faith in the innkeeper was the traveler’s saving grace.
By trusting a warning given by someone with knowledge, a warning
possibly given without any explanation or definable reason, the
traveler saved not only his valuables but possibly his very soul.
So it is with you. It is by the trust and faith you place in
someone other than yourself – me - that you will successfully
attain journey’s end.”

Lowenah lovingly poked Darla on the arm,
grinning. “I could go on and on. You know I love my voice when this
kind of mood is on me. Let me finish with this: It is your
boundless love for me bonding with your trust and faith in me that
will see you safely through your coming trials, and come they will.
Love will make it an easy matter to faithfully carry on when the
path becomes uncertain, you knowing I will never betray you. True,
tribulation and suffering may well haunt your journeys, but the
final promise will always be waiting your arrival. That three bond
cord, faith - trust and faith combined - hope and love will never
betray you.”

She wagged a finger again. “Remember,
though, when all is finished and the reality is yours, faith and
hope will quietly pass away, but love - love
never
fails.”

Standing, Lowenah turned and asked Darla to
do the same. Studying her child’s comely form, she lovingly stroked
the girl’s skin. “You are most beautiful, a vision of loveliness. I
do love you, you know. You are one of my favorites, perfect in
every way.”

Looking up into Darla’s eyes, she confessed,
“You are not the only one needing faith. I, too, need it - had it
in you. I did not doubt your loyalty and love for me the other day
on that tortured plain. Oh yes, my heart ached at seeing your
suffering, but I did not doubt you for one minute. I’m so proud of
you!”

To say Darla was shocked would be an
understatement. The girl did not know how to respond. Wrapping her
arms about her mother, the girl wept for joy.

After waiting a respectable time, Lowenah
finally pulled away, taking hold of Darla’s shoulders. “How can
someone hope if they do not know what awaits them at journey’s end?
Your sisters have hoped to once again receive the Dream of Dreams,
a gift stolen from them by your evil brother. By their faith, they
patiently wait for the day when another will deliver to them that
dream.”

“But for you, how could you hope for
something you had no knowledge regarding? Or how could I defend
your future promised glory if you to did not suffer the test of a
deceiver’s heart? So, now that you have seen afar off the glory of
the Dream of Dreams, it is now time for you to witness it to the
full.”

Darla was dumbstruck. “What?
How?
”

Lowenah frowned, then smiled impish. “My
hand is short, is it?” That smile slowly faded as she stared into
her child’s eyes. “I give to you both the blessing and the curse -
ecstasy and agony. I deliver both into your hands. The Dream of
Dreams is to be yours for the coming moment…” She turned away,
hiding tears that revealed future knowledge. Excited, but also
concerned, Darla asked, “Mother, oh Mother, please tell me. Do not
hold back a single thing from your child.”