The Boyfriend Sessions (29 page)

“What do you think of Sydney?”

I watched as Ben tilted his head to one side and appeared to be taking in the scene around us. We were at Darling Harbour, strolling along the stretch of alfresco restaurants and bars in the King Street Wharf district.

“Modern. Fresh. Relaxed. At the same time, striving hard to find an identity, to be recognized.”

I shook my head in wonder at his response. English wasn’t Ben’s first language, yet he always spoke so eloquently. Despite my complete inability to speak or write French, I knew intuitively that this man must be one hell of a journalist.

“How long are you in Sydney for?” I asked.

“It’s open-ended.”

I bit my lip, unsure what he meant and looked away. I decided to change the subject. “Where would you like to go now?”

“I am easy. Although I could do with another coffee, I think. It would be morning in Paris right now, so I feel like I’ve been up all night.”

I glanced sideways at him. Jetlagged or not, he looked fine. His violet eyes were alert, taking in the evening crowd at Darling Harbour, and his mop of black hair kept falling over his eyes from the breeze. I looked away, not comfortable with the fact I was studying him so closely.

“How about we head back toward your hotel? I could do with the walk after dinner and there are some nice bars and coffee shops in the Rocks district where you’re staying,” I suggested. We’d just finished eating at an Italian restaurant and I was still feeling overfull after the giant plate of marinara I’d chosen.

“
Oui
.
” Ben reached over casually and took my hand.

I stiffened involuntarily, stopped walking and turned to him, extracting my hand from his grip delicately. He remained silent and simply watched my awkwardness through inquisitive eyes.

“I’m seeing someone else,” I told him abruptly.

He nodded. “I thought as much.”

Although it had been over two hours since we’d first met for dinner, our conversation hadn’t covered anything too serious. Ben had told me about the journalistic assignment he’d just finished—a big story uncovering a series of fraudulent activities being carried out in the French banking sector—and I’d told him about my work situation and plans.

The annoying thing was, to my mind anyway, that the conversation and the night so far had felt extremely comfortable. Like old friends catching up. Our discussions hadn’t been forced, they’d felt natural. Except for the underlying attraction that seemed to flow unspoken between us, I felt as though I’d been doing pretty well to ignore it.

“Was it someone you were seeing before you came to Paris?” He sounded relaxed, but his eyes were curious.

I looked away. “No.”

“How long have you been going out?”

“About a month.”

Ben turned away and started walking again in the direction of the city. “Is it serious?”

“It’s only been a month.”

“I proposed to you after six weeks.”

I didn’t have an answer for that, so I kept walking in silence beside him.

“Does your new boyfriend know what you’re doing tonight?”

“Yes.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “Understanding boyfriend.”

“Can we not talk about Max?” I requested quickly, then inwardly kicked myself. I hadn’t meant to use his name. “I’m not sure we should see each other again after tonight.”

“My being here complicates things for you,” he said flatly.

I nodded stiffly. “It puts me in an awkward situation.”

“Your boyfriend is not comfortable with you spending time with me?”

“Would you be?” I shot back, a little too quickly.

He paused for a moment before speaking again. “If I told you I was just here as a friend, would it make things easier?”

I gave him a confused look. “How do you mean?”

“I’m not here to cause problems for you.” He gave me a regretful look. “I can’t pretend I’m not disappointed.”

“I’m sorry.”

This time when he laced his fingers through mine, I didn’t resist. “I wanted to be sure you were certain when you told me no in Paris. I guess I didn’t even consider you might be seeing someone else. Arrogant, no?”

I squeezed his hand. “Not arrogant, Ben. I’m not exactly marriage material, if you must know the truth.”

He stopped and turned me to face him. “You underrate yourself. One day, you will want it and not be able to explain why, except to look into that special someone’s eyes.”

I blinked. French men. He really was ridiculously charming. “I wish I could have been that for you.”

“You can’t pretend, Christa, and I wouldn’t want you to.”

Suddenly I was oblivious to the city around us. The lights, the sounds of traffic and people seemed to blend into the background, and all I could focus on were his eyes. Those incredible eyes. I shook my head and looked away. Belatedly I wondered if I’d been wrong not to give our relationship a chance.

He tugged my hand and I allowed myself to walk beside him again. “I’d still like to stay here a couple of weeks,” Ben told me, pulling me back to the present. “Do you think it would be possible to spend some more time together so you could show me around your beautiful city? That is if you and your boyfriend are comfortable with it?”

“You want to meet my boyfriend?” I wasn’t sure if I was ready for that.

“Not necessarily. If he would feel more comfortable, then I could. I’m asking for you to be my tour guide. As a friend.”

As a friend? Was that even possible? Then again, he’d come all this way for me. The least I could do was show him around my city. In a couple of weeks he’d be gone. I did my best to ignore the pang of guilt currently constricting my chest, and gave Ben a bright smile. Max would just have to live with it.

“I’d be happy to.”

*

“You’re kidding, right?”

The wind whipped my curls around my eyes incessantly, despite the cap fixed firmly to my head. I watched as Max dropped the Porsche down a gear and darted into a gap in traffic. His strong, olive forearms glistened with a light sheen of sweat from the late morning sun, distracting me momentarily.

“No,” I replied. “I felt it was the least I could do while he was here. Besides, Ben’s only here for a couple of weeks and then he’ll be gone. I’ll probably never see him again.”

“Mmm.” A muscle twitched in Max’s jaw. The light turned orange ahead of us and I sat upright in my seat as Max hit the accelerator and propelled us forward through the now red light.

“You’re annoyed at me.” I could understand he wasn’t happy about the situation, but he didn’t need to endanger our lives in the process.

Max shook his head. “You don’t get it, do you?”

“What?”

“The guy still has feelings for you, Christa.”

I huffed dramatically. “Well, of course he has feelings for me, he proposed to me. But I’ve explained the situation and he’s fine with it.”

We actually pulled up at a set of traffic lights this time and Max turned to look incredulously at me. “For a smart woman, you sure can be dumb sometimes.”

I recoiled, his words stinging. Who did he think he was? He wasn’t being remotely fair.

He ignored my obvious outrage and turned back to face the road, pulling off from the lights at his usual lightning speed. “Ben’s not giving up. He still wants you.”

I opened my mouth, then closed it again. That wasn’t true. Was it? Max didn’t even know Ben. “I don’t think you know what you’re talking about,” I started, carefully.

“Oh, yes, I do. You just don’t see it.”

“Max. Seriously? You’re being paranoid.”

“Maybe a little. But I’m a guy and I know what I’m talking about.”

I bit back an incredulous laugh. “So that gives you the right to speak on behalf of all guys? Oh, come on!”

“Think about it from his perspective.” Max leaned over to squeeze my leg and I resisted the urge to slap him away. Annoying man. “He’s traveled all this way to see you and has discovered you’re seeing someone else.”

“Exactly. I’m taken.”

Sensing my frigidity, he shot me an infuriating grin and let go of my leg. “Not really. You’re still fair game from Ben’s perspective.”

“Fair game?” I was rapidly moving from outrage to extremely pissed. I didn’t like being referred to as a marketable commodity.

“He was on the scene before I was. He felt you had enough of a connection after six weeks to propose to you. So now you’ve been seeing me for what? About a month?” He sent me a pointed look. “He’s not giving up yet. Mark my word.”

I didn’t say anything in response and instead turned away to look at the view. I always knew Max could be determined—I was the first to admit, it was rather attractive—but now his determination was lapsing into stubbornness and sheer pig-headedness, in my opinion.

He was wrong and he didn’t know what he was talking about. Ben was totally fine after I’d explained the situation to him last night. A complete gentleman. Which was why I’d originally fallen for him in the first place. We’d spent the next hour or so enjoying coffee and dessert at a cosy bar in the Rocks, where we’d chatted happily about how Ben should spend the rest of his time in Australia.

“You can not believe me all you like, Christa, but it doesn’t change the facts.”

I swung around to glare at him. “The fact that you’re being a jerk, you mean?”

Max blew out a long breath and appeared to be controlling his emotions. “So what? You want me to be happy about the fact you’re planning on spending time with your ex? You’ve got to be kidding.”

“I don’t expect you to be happy about it! I was just hoping you could be more adult about it.”

Before I realized what was happening, Max pulled the car over to the side of the road and jerked the handbrake on. He pulled his sunglasses off, his dark eyes impossibly hard as they bored into mine. “I am being adult about it. I didn’t tell you not to see him. I’m just telling you not to be so naive.”

I was glad I still had my sunglasses on, because the sting of tears was burning the corners of my eyes. “Is that what you think of me? That I’m a naive fool?”

Max let out something resembling a frustrated growl and reached around the back of my neck and pulled me to him. Before I could resist, his lips were on mine, hot, hard and more than a little bit angry. I started to pull away, but he tightened his grip and deepened the kiss.

A hot surge of lust burned my skin, my heartbeat pounding and my senses swimming. He was being such a bastard, but then why was my body responding this way? I opened myself to him, the blood pumping wildly through my veins and his heated anger morphed into a heady mix of desire, need and want.

I was accustomed to him being determined when it came to the two of us. What I wasn’t ready for was the wild kick of heat currently directed my way. It was fuelled by aggression yet somehow laced with an undercurrent of tenderness. What was he doing to me?

Finally he released me, the fire in his eyes receding and replaced with look of wariness. “How could you even think that? I don’t think you’re a fool, Christa. You just don’t see how other people—other guys—see you, that’s all.”

I eased myself back into the seat shakily. “Well, if every single guy out there feels the same way you do, then I’m in trouble.”

Max smiled wryly, but there was no joy in it. “You have no idea.”

He did a quick check for cars and pulled the Porsche into the flow of traffic.

We sat silently for a few kilometers, Max concentrating on driving, while I watched the rows of houses and apartments fly past. Alright, so perhaps I was being a bit unfair. Max had laid his heart on the line and told me he was falling for me. I still hadn’t returned his feelings—whatever they were—and now I was telling him I was going to spend time with my dashing Parisian ex-boyfriend.

I sighed. “How about if when I’m showing Ben around Sydney I take Cate or someone else with me?” A perverse part of me was inwardly outraged at the prospect of a chaperone, but then it wasn’t like he’d told me he didn’t trust me. It was Ben he didn’t trust.

“You could take Maddy.”

I let out a strangled cry. Surely he wasn’t serious?

“Alright,” he conceded, “you’re probably right. She’d ruin his holiday.” He glanced over at me and grinned widely. I hated that my heart jumped.

“Did you want to meet him?” I asked. I wasn’t sure it was a great idea, but I felt I should at least give him the option. Whatever would put him at ease. “Not one-on-one,” I added quickly. “I could arrange for a group of us to go out.”

“Not sure. I’ll think about it.”

I nodded and reached a tentative hand over to rest on his leg. His fingers found mine and he squeezed gently.

“Hey,” he said softly.

“Hey.”

“Can we go and enjoy our Saturday now?” he suggested.

“Sure.”

We had a date with the beach. They were predicting a hot day and we’d decided to head down to the sand for a walk and maybe grab a coffee. And, if we were game, we could brave the water, which still hadn’t quite caught up with the warm weather. It seemed preferable to discussing the subject of Ben again.

“Please say you’ll do it, Cate?” I sincerely hoped she wasn’t going to make me beg.

Cate surveyed me from her curled up position on her bed. It was late Saturday night and I was trying to convince her to join me tomorrow while I played tourist guide to Ben.

She picked up the remote control sitting next to her and pointed it at the flat screen television located on the set of drawers across the room. The tinny noise of the manufactured laughter from the late night talk show she’d been watching was cut off abruptly.

“I’ll feel like a third wheel,” she protested.

“That’s the idea! Three is better than two in this case.”

Her light blue eyes stared back at me, and I hated the way her face looked pale and hollow. “I’m not exactly in a great frame of mind right now.”

I pushed off the edge of the door and went to sit opposite her on the bed. “But don’t you see? You’ll feel better if you get out and about. Distract yourself.”

Cate sniffed and her eyes filled. I reached over and plucked a tissue from the box beside her bed and handed it to her.

“Thanks,” she said. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” That bastard Dave should be the one who was sorry, I thought, seething inwardly. The night before Cate had confronted him—after sex, she was only human I supposed, and I wasn’t exactly one to criticise. Dave had admitted that he wasn’t ready, or in a position, to leave his wife. Cate was shattered. Worse than that, she was filled with guilt over being the other woman and I couldn’t say I blamed her.

“I just can’t believe I let myself get involved with him in the first place!” she cried. “Now I’m going to have to look for another job.”

I sighed. “Cate, you’ve been with your firm for over seven years. Surely you could ask for a transfer or to work under a different partner.”

“I don’t know. Maybe. Even if I didn’t work with him anymore, I’d still see him.”

I couldn’t argue with her and didn’t have any great advice. When Nick and I had called off our engagement, I couldn’t find another job quickly enough. “Look. It’s all the more reason to come and spend the day with Ben and I tomorrow. It’ll clear your head. I’ll shout you for any of the costs and Max will be eternally grateful.”

I planned on taking Ben on the Sydney Harbour Bridge climb. Then we were going to catch a ferry across the harbor for lunch in the beachside tourist hub of Manly.

Cate offered a weak smile. “I think Max is being very understanding.”

“Honestly, he has nothing to be worried about. Not that he would believe me.”

“Can you blame him?”

I grimaced. “I guess not.”

Cate reached over and put a hand on my leg. “He’s in love with you, Christa. He doesn’t want to lose you. That’s pretty special, especially from where I’m coming from at the moment.”

Her eyes filled again and I reached over and hugged her hard. She cried into my shoulder for a minute more, before easing back. “Sorry.”

“Like I said, don’t be. You deserve better.”

“I know. Still hurts though.”

I squeezed her hand. “Yeah, it does. So will you leave your box of tissues behind and come out with us tomorrow?” I hated seeing her like this.

“Sure.” She scrunched up her tissue and threw it into the bin. “They have harnesses on the Bridge Climb, don’t they?”

“Cate,” I admonished. “He’s not worth it.”

“I know. I’m just being dramatic. I’d feel better if I could push the bastard off instead.”

“That’s more like it.”

*

God, it was beautiful.

I braced myself against the strong breeze and stared at Sydney Harbour currently spread out before us. The water was a deep blue and the glare from the office towers reflected piercingly in the late morning sun. Below us, boats drifted by in the harbor. It was strangely disconcerting to be standing above the flow of traffic on the bridge, and the trains as they shot past.

How had I never done this before? Admittedly, it wasn’t cheap and you wouldn’t want to be scared of heights, but the view was beyond words.

Cate stood to one side of me and Ben on my other. They too appeared speechless.

“You live in a very beautiful city.” The reverence in Ben’s voice was endearing and I was secretly pleased. The skyline of Paris was nothing to be sniffed at either.

“We’re very lucky,” Cate agreed. I was happy to see some color in her cheeks.

We stared a long while at the view, before we were ushered along by our guide. At the next viewing point I found myself thinking about Max. I suddenly wished my mobile phone wasn’t secured in one of the lockers assigned to us. It was completely reasonable that we were unable to bring them with us. Our tour guide had explained any loose items, such as cameras and mobile phones, taken on the climb were considered a risk and rightly so. It was just a shame I couldn’t take a picture of the view with my camera phone and send it to Max with a message like ‘wish you were here’.

After a while, we made our way down the steps for the return journey, our safety harnesses gliding smoothly alongside us. We talked easily between the three of us about the view, the city, and our plans for the rest of the day. I was happy to discover that Ben was gracious about Cate joining us and they’d both made a decent effort at conversation with each other.

About halfway down, Cate leaned over and spoke softly to me. “Thanks, Christa. You were right. This is wonderful and just what I needed right now.”

I smiled warmly at her and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “My pleasure.”

“You mean Christa had to convince you to come along and join us today?” Ben mocked, sounding hurt. I hadn’t realized he’d been listening in.

Cate looked flustered. “Oh no, not like that. I’ve just had a bad week, that’s all.”

“All the more reason to get out and enjoy your beautiful city then.”

He had an uncanny way of putting people at ease. Cate responded with a shy smile and I shot him a grateful grin as we continued down the stairs.

A few minutes later, while Cate was chatting to a young American couple behind her, Ben leaned over to me. “Is she alright? She didn’t look too well when you arrived this morning.”

I was surprised he’d noticed. “She’s fine. Difficult break up, that’s all.” I didn’t feel in a position to say much more.

“I’m sorry to hear that. Were they going out long?”

It was an innocent question, but I hesitated. “Not long, no. She’s better off without him.”

Ben nodded, sensing my reluctance. “Well, let’s do our best to make her forget about it today, then.”

Without thinking, I reached over and squeezed his hand. He was such a sweet man. Here he was on holidays and he was worried about my friend. “Thanks.”

We spoke little the rest of the way down the bridge, concentrating on our descent and each of us lost in our own thoughts. At the conclusion of our tour, Ben made a show of buying the professional photograph that had been taken of the three of us.

“Overlooking spectacular Sydney Harbour with two of Sydney’s most beautiful women, how could I not?” was his response, when I told him he was being a typical tourist and paying the exorbitant price for our happy snap.

Next we set off for Circular Quay and our ferry ride across to Manly. It was about a five or ten minute walk to the ferry terminal, so I took the opportunity to check my phone. I noticed with interest a text message from Max sent about half an hour earlier.

I opened the message.
No, I’m not checking up on you. I miss you. Wish I was sharing this gorgeous day with you. If that makes me a jealous bastard, then guilty as charged xx

I smiled to myself. Determined, honest and sweet. Frustrating at times maybe, but it wasn’t all bad. I decided to put his mind at ease and typed in a reply.

Expect your punishment in full tonight, Spencer. Oh, and I miss you too. The view from the bridge was spectacular. Would have been even better with you there xo

“Come on, Christa.” We’d reached Circular Quay and Cate was motioning for me to join them and purchase our tickets.

Once on board the Manly ferry, we opted for a seat outside so Ben could appreciate the journey. After we sat down, Ben turned to Cate.

“You’re not the first person to fall for the wrong person, you know.”

My eyes widened at his remark. What had I missed?

Cate frowned. “I know. But I was wrong to act on it.”

Ben shrugged. “You can’t undo the past. The only thing you can control is right now. My advice? Move on and forgive yourself.”

“Easy to say, harder to do. And besides, you can’t exactly talk can you? You flew across the world to see Christa again.”

I had definitely missed something. At some point when I’d been absorbed in messaging Max, the topic of conversation had turned serious. I was surprised Cate was being so honest with Ben, but then she could also be quite candid when the mood struck.

Ben glanced across at me. “She hadn’t given me a final answer.”

“You could have called her first,” Cate suggested.

Ben shrugged again. “So I’m a romantic fool. And I wanted a holiday.”

“You’re a romantic,” I interrupted. “You’re not a fool.”

Ben smiled warmly at me, the sun making his glossy, dark hair appear even shinier.

Cate sighed. “I’m a romantic and I’m a fool.”

“Come on, Cate, that’s enough,” I told her. “You can start by not thinking about it anymore for now. Let’s enjoy this gorgeous day, okay? No more relationship talk.”

“Alright,” she agreed reluctantly.

“So what important landmarks am I missing?” Ben asked, in an obvious attempt to change the subject.

Cate didn’t put up any more of a fight and gestured toward some of the points of interest we were passing. My phone beeped just as we were opposite Rose Bay in Sydney’s eastern suburbs.

Another message from Max.

Can I bring handcuffs?

Cheeky. If he was trying to keep my mind off my ex currently seated next to me and fixed on my relationship with him, his strategy was working. A brief vision of what I could do with those handcuffs popped into my head and I swallowed while my heart rate increased a notch. I quickly typed a reply.

I know what you’re trying to do, Spencer. It’s enough to make me go find those school uniforms …

There. Two could play at that game.

“Everything alright?”

Ben watched me with a quizzical look and my pink flush flamed bright red. “Fine.”

My phone beeped again in my hand, making me jump. Ben raised an eyebrow then turned back to the view, while I opened the message.

Please tell me that’s a promise. My place. 8pm. Or I’ll come looking for you (and your ex).

It was my turn to raise an eyebrow. I couldn’t decide whether I liked this new side of Max or not.

*

“Why, Miss Morrison, that doesn’t look much like a school uniform to me.”

I hadn’t come good on my promise of the school uniform. Judging by the way Max’s eyes twinkled, he would get over it. I shrugged. “Another time perhaps.” Truth was, I was actually quite exhausted from playing tourist guide the whole day and was looking forward to relaxing.

Max stood aside to let me through his front door. Before I could register what he was doing, I heard a light metallic click and something cool encircled my wrist. My eyes widened.

With a knowing smile, he leaned down and planted a long, lingering kiss on my mouth. He smelled fresh from the shower, a mixture of soap and his woody, spicy aftershave. Distraction would get him everywhere.

“Come on.”

He tugged my right wrist lightly, the one that now appeared to now be encased in a handcuff, and led me to his bedroom.

I didn’t resist, but my heart was beating double time. “Is this how you greet all your girlfriends?”

A sly grin. “Only the ones who spend the day out with their ex-boyfriends.”

“I’m to be punished then?” The unexpected rush of blood pumping through my system made me sound breathless, which I was.

Max stepped in and pressed his forehead to mine. “I’m not into that, sorry. This is just so you’ll stay still.”

I swallowed. “Why would I need to stay still?”

He didn’t reply. Instead he eased away and crouched down, his dark eyes glinting like liquid coal up at me. Slowly, he ran his palms down my bare legs, the friction of the gentle slide leaving a trail of heat along their path. He eased them up again, until they disappeared under my denim skirt.

I groaned softly as his hands slipped under my underwear, one palm cupping my bottom and the other finding me wet and warm and ready. I arched back as his fingers gently entered me, then retreated to stroke until I responded by pushing away in a mixture of painful exhilaration.

“That’s why,” he muttered, and made me cry out as he pulled my underwear, then skirt, to the ground swiftly, so I was standing naked from the waist down in front of him. “On the bed.”

I nodded, entranced by the determination in his eyes, and went to lie in the center of his bed, among the dark mass of black sheets and pillows. I watched while he kicked off his jeans, and the rest of his clothes, so he was standing before me, a tall statue of sculpted muscle and olive skin.

The smile he gave me was long and languid and full of satisfaction, which had the blood heating my veins. It felt like the surface of my skin was on fire. And he wasn’t even touching me.

He climbed over me, and reached up to fix both of my wrists to the functional black iron bed head. My pulse spiked at the harsh sound of metal on metal as the handcuffs slid down the bed head and it sounded loud and out of place above our breathing.

“If it hurts at any point, tell me and I’ll stop.”

I opened my mouth to respond with something sarcastic, but my breath left me in a warm rush of air as his tongue found me, and the sound contorted into a wild groan. I strained against the handcuffs. He wasn’t going slow, he wasn’t even giving me a chance to draw breath.

I arched up wildly under him and he pushed me down firmly—not enough to hurt me, just enough to remind me who was in control.

“Max—”

“That’s it.”

But it wasn’t it. He was going too fast and my body was on fire. My feet and fingers burned in response to his assault and I could feel the familiar slow burn starting inside me morphing into something more vicious and desperately raw.