Authors: Sandy James
She should still be mad at him. Hell, she should hate him. He’d lied to her and left her alone to face one of the scariest events of her life. Yet the anger was dissolving, vanishing like wisps of fog.
“He went to see Amber, you know,” Juliana said. “When he left the hospital, he drove right to Amber’s school.”
“Why are you defending him?” Mallory asked, resisting the urge to stomp her foot like an angry child. Then she saw another blush rise on Jules’s cheeks. “What did you do now?”
“I didn’t
do
anything. He came to the mixer last weekend to talk to me about you.”
“And?”
“And… Robert and I listened to the whole story.”
“I should’ve known Robert was in on this,” Mallory grumbled.
“Stop pouting and just listen, okay?” Jules pointed at Ben. “Look at what this man is willing to do for you. He’s doing his penance right here in front of everyone. He’s paying a high price for one mistake.”
The Service Learning students were heading to Bethany as two more kids brought out a couple of large clear plastic tubs, each marked
YES
or
NO
as well. Beth took the jars from each student, emptying them in the correct tub. Judging from the overwhelming difference in the size of the growing piles of money, there would be no reason to count the haul to find out the results.
Ben was going to get his head shaved.
Mallory’s thoughts became a storm, swirling and churning as she struggled to understand.
Ben was here, ready to have that gorgeous mane of hair shaved off.
For me.
Juliana called it “penance.” But why now? Why here? What could possibly prompt him to make such a public display of—
Mallory whirled on Juliana. “You told him!”
Everything suddenly made sense. The halftime show. Ben’s sacrifice. Amber standing at her side. There was only one reason all of these things were happening, and it only confirmed what she’d feared.
Ben knew the results of the CAT scan.
“Damn it, Jules! You
told
him!”
Jules had the nerve to look surprised. “What are you talking about?”
“You told him the test results! He’s here because of the CAT scan. That’s the only reason he’d do something like this. He knows the results.”
“Not from me, he doesn’t,” Juliana insisted.
“Don’t lie to me. There’s no other reason he’d be doing all of this now.”
God, she was a fool.
“Do you have cancer again?” Amber’s voice was hoarse, as though she could barely force the words out.
“Didn’t your father tell you?” Mallory knew her tone was snide, but she couldn’t help herself.
“He didn’t have to. We guessed you have cancer again.” Her teeth tugged on her lower lip as a tear spilled over her lashes. “We don’t care. We love you and we’ll be there to help you. Dad says he doesn’t care and neither do I.”
Mallory had a hard time letting Amber’s words sink in. “Your dad thinks I have cancer again?”
Amber nodded, wiping the back of her sleeve over her eyes. “Are you gonna have to have surgery again? Dad wants to help. I want to help. We don’t want you to be alone. We don’t want you to—” With a small cry, she threw herself against Mallory as sobs shook her whole body. “Please don’t die, Mallory. I love you.”
Mallory wrapped her arms around Amber and held her close. “Shh. It’s okay, honey. I love you, too.” She stroked the girl’s hair as her own eyes burned with unshed tears. “I’m not gonna die. I promise.”
Ben thought her cancer was back, yet he was still here, still telling her he loved her in front of a gym full of people. He was willing to be with her even if it meant holding her hand through surgeries. Even if it meant watching her puke her guts out. Even if it meant a whole lot more hard stuff she didn’t want to even consider. He was here. And he was here for keeps.
Suddenly, all was right in the world again.
“Looks like the voters have spoken,” Bethany said, drawing Mallory’s gaze back to center court. “You all want Ben bald? Then you’re gonna get Ben bald!” She held the clippers high.
With an exaggerated shrug and a goofy smile, Ben sat down on the stool while a student draped a towel around his shoulders.
He believed her cancer had returned. That thought kept slamming through Mallory’s brain. Even though he thought she was sick again, he was here, ready to make this sacrifice, this penance, as a way to make amends.
“Amber…” Mallory turned the girl so she could see Ben. “You should watch this.”
“And away we go!” Bethany handed the microphone to a student and flipped on the clippers.
Standing beside him, she started at his widow’s peak and cut a wide swath through his thick, dark hair, leaving behind a reverse Mohawk.
Ben picked up a large lock, held it up, and laughed as though he were having the time of his life.
The crowd went wild as Bethany continued running the clippers over his hair. The swatches perched on Ben’s shoulders and chest or cascaded to the floor. Within a matter of minutes, it was done.
Ben stood up, whipped the towel off like a cape, and held his arms up as the applause rose to a deafening level. Then his gaze searched again, finding hers. With an arrogant smile, he crooked his finger at her.
What was he up to now?
Bethany retrieved the microphone and handed it to Ben. Then she signaled the crowd to quiet down as her Service Learning kids did the same.
“One more act in this play, folks, if you wouldn’t mind,” Ben said. “I need Mallory Hamilton to come out here and join me.” He pointed at her and then crooked his finger again.
“He’s insane,” Mallory muttered, feeling self-conscious as every eye in the gym turned her way.
“He’s in love,” Danielle said with a laugh. She gave Mallory a gentle push. “Well, what are you waiting for? Go down there!”
“Let’s go, Mallory.” Amber took her hand and dragged her down the aisle.
While she could’ve resisted, Mallory realized her embarrassment would triple if she sat down and refused to move. Better to find out what Ben had up his sleeve and then make a hasty exit.
When she reached the tarp, Amber released her hand, which was promptly picked up by Ben.
He led her to the stool before kissing the back of her hand. His smile made her weak in the knees.
“Have a seat, Mal,” he said, holding the microphone away so no one else could hear.
She took advantage of the moment of being close enough to talk to him. “Ben… we need to talk. It’s about the CAT scan…”
“Sit now. Talk later.”
“But…”
“Please?” His dark eyes begged her to cooperate.
“Fine.” There would be plenty of time to talk after this circus ended.
Mallory sat on the stool and put her hands on her knees. “Now what?”
“Now, you listen.” Ben winked and then spoke into the microphone again. “I love this woman.” He pointed at Mallory as hoots and cheers filled the gym. “And now I need to ask her a question.”
When Ben went down on one knee as he fumbled for something in his pocket, Mallory’s heart beat so roughly, she feared it would explode. Adrenaline rushed through her, making her tremble.
“Mallory Hamilton… will you marry me?” He set the microphone on the floor and put a small black box on his palm. Then he extended his hand toward her.
The crowd had gone berserk, the noise louder than any pep session ever held there.
Fingers pressed against her mouth, Mallory fought back tears. All of this, especially Ben’s proposal, was overwhelming.
“Please forgive me, Mal,” Ben asked, his voice gruff. “I never meant to hurt you. Marry me. Let me take care of you. Be with me for whatever time we have left. Six days or sixty years, I want to spend them all with you.”
She dropped from the stool, landing on her knees to look Ben in the eyes. Words wouldn’t come.
“I mean it. I love you, no matter what happens in the future.” He opened the box. “This is for you.”
The ring was perfect: a gold band with a square diamond.
“Marry me. Please.”
All she could do was cup his face in her shaking hands and press a kiss to his lips. She moved her mouth to say yes, but her voice held no volume. Just to be sure he understood, she nodded.
Bethany’s voice filled the gym. “She said yes!”
* * *
Ben pulled his truck up behind Mallory’s SUV. She gave him a shy smile after she’d crawled out of the driver’s side and stood waiting for him by the garage door.
Robert hadn’t been lying when he said he was a clever bastard. When he’d come with Bethany to the town house to explain their plan for a basketball game proposal, Ben had thought they’d both lost their minds. Mallory had kept her illness so private he couldn’t help but think he’d only piss her off more by putting on such a public display. Bethany changed his mind, explaining that so much of Mallory’s life was vested in the school, a proposal in front of her fellow teachers and students would please her.
He ran his hand over the light stubble that was now his hair, wondering just how bad he looked. There had to be stray tufts Bethany had missed, and no doubt his sideburns and the back of his neck would need a razor to make a clean line. Didn’t matter. Losing his hair was a small price to pay to prove to Mallory that he loved her and was truly sorry for what had happened.
Her hair had grown back. So would his.
The only thing dimming his joy was the knowledge that they still had a battle to fight against her cancer. But fight they would with every ounce of their strength, and he hoped that Mallory would be stronger with him and Amber standing by her side.
“Hey,” she said when he got to her. “We need to talk.”
Talking was the last thing he wanted to do, but he nodded, resisting the urge to kiss her.
“How about we have a glass of wine?” she asked.
“Wine sounds great.” Anything to help him relax.
Ben was wound so tight he wasn’t sure he could form too many coherent sentences. He wanted to make love to her, to reclaim what he’d lost with his mistake. He wanted inside her incredible heat, to join their bodies. Repeatedly. On the couch. In the bed. In the shower.
It was too soon. Hell, he didn’t even know if they
could
make love. Although she was sick, she didn’t look as though she was hurting. He had no idea if she was on chemotherapy or radiation or…
what
.
“Are you sure we shouldn’t check on Amber?” Mallory asked.
“She’s fine. She has a new friend named Kelsie. They’ve been spending a lot of time together. Kelsie’s mom will keep an eye on her tonight, some sleepover for a few girls.” He tossed her a lopsided smile. “I think Amber finally has a BFF. Isn’t that what you call it? A BFF?”
“Yeah,” Mallory said with a chuckle. “That’s what they say. It sounds weird coming from you.”
He followed her inside, hovering close as she chose a wine and let him open it. Her cat came to rub against his leg, and he gave it an affectionate stroke.
“Rascal missed you,” she said, nodding at her cat.
“I missed him, too.”
Watching her closely, Ben searched for anything that might help him know how she was feeling. Nothing appeared to be different. She was the same Mallory she’d been two weeks ago when he’d been foolish enough to hurt her.
“I’m sorry.” The words would never adequately express how remorseful he was. How could two words convey the depth of sorrow that had gripped him when she’d locked him out or express the weight on his heart at knowing he’d hurt her so much? “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was afraid for Amber.”
“I know that now,” Mallory said. “I should’ve given you a chance to explain.” She led him to the great room. She took a seat on the sofa, turning to face him as she sipped her wine. “We need to talk about the CAT scan.”
“It’s okay, baby. I know. The cancer’s back. That’s why you moved in with Juliana. But I’m here now.”
“You’re willing to move in with me? I’m gonna need you close.”
“I—I hoped you’d want me to. I want to help you through your treatments, and that’s hard to do when I’m all the way across town.”
“Good. I want you and Amber here like we’d planned.”
“So what does your doctor say?” The last thing he wanted to do was ruin their reunion by talking about her disease, but he needed to know everything he’d missed.
A smile lit her face.
How in the hell could she smile in the face of cancer? The woman was the epitome of courage.
“My doctor doesn’t say much of anything,” she replied. “I haven’t talked to him in almost two weeks.”
“What?”
The word burst from him in a shout, sending the cat running from the room.
She snatched the glass from his hand, probably to stop wine from flying around with his animated gestures.
“You’ve gotta get on top of this right away, Mal. I figured you might already be getting chemo. When did he biopsy the lump?”
She put both glasses aside, setting them on the coffee table. “No need for a biopsy.”
“No need?” His tone bordered on hysterical. “You had a new lump in your breast! How could there be
no need
?” He couldn’t lose her, not now that he’d finally won her back.
“The lump wasn’t in my breast, Ben. It was in my abdomen… my lower abdomen.”
The words took a moment to register, and once he realized what that development meant, he had to hold back the urge to punch a hole in the wall. It was much worse than he thought. “It’s metastasized. Oh God…” When he tried to rake his fingers through his hair, all he got was the feel of sandpaper across his palm.
Mallory took his hands in hers. “It’s not metastasized.”
“How do you know?”
“Because it’s not cancer.”
His whole body tensed. “It’s what?”
“It’s not cancer, Ben.”
“It’s not… Then what is it?”
A slow smile spread over her beautiful face. “A hernia. The lump was nothing but a stupid hernia.”
* * *
Mallory watched him closely, trying to capture every nuanced emotion playing on his face. If he hadn’t declared his love, she would have seen it as clear as day in his reaction to her news.
Ben popped to his feet and tugged her up as well. Then he embraced her, near to crushing her against his chest. “Thank God. He answered all my prayers.”
To be back in his arms was heaven, even if he was squeezing the breath right out of her. She closed her eyes and breathed in his scent. She’d been so afraid back in the gym—afraid he’d only come to her because Jules had told him she was fine.
Instead, Ben had proposed to her even though he believed she might be facing another long trial by fire, even though he thought she might be dying.
And that revelation swept away every last ounce of her anger.
He really would stay with her through sickness and health. He was still the hero of her dreams.
“Ben?”
“Yeah?”
“Take me to bed,” she demanded.
Easing back, he lifted her chin with his finger. “Tell me you forgive me first.”
“I forgive you. Now take me—”
“Tell me you love me again.”
“I never stopped loving you. I want you to—”
“Tell me you’re gonna marry me.”
“Absolutely.” To keep Ben from interrupting her again, Mallory slipped her hand between them and pressed her palm against his groin.
He was already hard.
Grabbing his hand, she laughed as she dragged him toward the stairs.
“In a hurry, there, Mal?”
“Absolutely.”
Once upstairs, she tugged him into the master bedroom and shut the door behind them.