The Audubon Reader (38 page)

God forever bless thee—be assured that I left my business going on well in London, &c., but more when I write next—again farewell …

Thine for ever—

New York

10 May 1829

My dearest friend,

I have been landed here from on board the packet ship the
Columbia
, four days after an agreeable passage of 35 from Portsmouth. I have written thee, since then, 2 short letters to announce thee my safe arrival and my good health and now set to write at length a letter which I sincerely hope and wish thee to read with due attention, and believe to be in its whole contents the true sentiment of thy affectionate friend and husband.

1. I have come to America to remain as long as consistent with the safety of my publication in London without my personal presence, and according to future circumstances either to return to England on the 1st of October next or, if possible, not till the 1st of April 1830. In this I must be guided entirely by the advice of my friends in England,
William Rathbone, J. G. Children of the British Museum, and Mr.
Robert Havell, Jr., my engraver.

2. I wish to employ and devote every moment of my sojourn in America at drawing such birds and plants as I think necessary to enable me to give my publication throughout the degree of perfection that I am told exists in that portion already published and now before the public. This intention is known to no one individual and I wish it to be kept perfectly a secret between our two selves. To accomplish the whole of this, or as much as I can of it, between now and my return to Europe I intend to remain as stationary as possible in such parts of the country as will afford me most of the subjects, and these parts I know well.

3. I have left my business going on quite well and with hopes that my return there will not be forced upon me by disappointments. My engraver has in his hands all the drawings wanted to complete this present year and those necessary to form the 1st Number of the next year, and my cash arrangements to meet my
engagements with him I think have been, and are, prudently managed and sure.

4. The exact situation of my
stock on hand left in Europe I give thee here
bona fide
, copied from the receipt I have on hand and with me here:

about 6,960 dollars.

I have with me 150 £, 2 copies of my work, $200, plenty of clothes, my watch [@] 100 £, Gun [@] 20 £, &c. The above, my dear Lucy, is the present stock of thy husband, raised in the 2 first years of my publication, the two most difficult years to be encountered, with a stock of fame not likely, I hope, to decrease but to support me and enable me to live decently but not in affluence but respectably. Should I be absent until the 1st of January next without drawing for money on England, and my work is published with regularity, there will be 500 pounds to be added of money either due to me or received for my account—and an additional stock of coppers [i.e., engraving plates] of 252 £. The more my subscribers augment in numbers, the greater my profits, and on that score I have great hopes!!—
and good reasons for thus hoping!

To my Lucy I now offer myself with my stock, wares and chattels and all the devotedness of heart attached to such an enthusiastic being as I am—to which I proffer to add my industry and humble talents as long as able, through health and our God’s will, to render her days as comfortable as such means may best afford, with caution and prudence. In return for these present offers, I wish to receive as
true
and as
frank
an answer
as I know my Lucy will give me
, saying whether or no the facts and the prospects will entice her to join her husband and go to Europe with him; to enliven his spirits and assist him with her kind advice. The “no” or the “yes” will
stamp my future years. If a “no” comes
I never will put the question again
and
we probably never will meet again
. If a “yes,” a kindly “yes” comes bounding from thy heart, my heart will bound also, and it seems to me that it will give me nerve for further exertions!

We have been married a good time; circumstances have caused our voyage to be very mottled with incidents of very different nature; but our
happy days
are the only days
I now remember
. The tears that now almost blind me are the vouchers for my heart’s emotions at the recollection of those happy days! I have no wish to
entice thee to come by persuasions
; I wish thee to consult thy own self and that only, and to write to me accordingly thy determination, the amount of thy own pecuniary means and how soon I might expect thee in
Philadelphia from after the time this reaches thee. I cannot go to Louisiana without running risks incalculable of not receiving regular news from London. Either go to Louisville and even to
Wheeling on the Ohio and I will meet thee at the latter place at the time appointed by thyself.

5. I do not wish to take John with us unless it be to follow my profession and I have no wish whatever to enforce this upon him. Settle him at Louisville with whomever thou may like best; some future years may bring us
all
together!

Victor being settled I feel happy on his account, and that is all a father must desire.

6. Thy determination must be prompt, either “yes” or “no.” If coming, thou must settle as quick as prudence will permit, sell all that is at all cumbersome and ship whatever is not absolutely necessary for thy journey through Mr.
Charles Briggs to the care of Messrs. Rathbone Brothers & Co., Liverpool. Ascend the Ohio or sail direct for here or Philadelphia as may suit thy wishes best. Sell for cash at reduced prices rather than leave debts behind thee. If thou determine on coming, I wish thee to be with me before the 1st day of October, because, should I be recalled to England on account of accidents, we must sail on that day in the same vessel that has brought me here. I have pitched on Philadelphia for remaining until I have thy answer to this because the market is good for my purpose and the woods very diversified in their trees. When with me, we can go somewhere else if time will permit. Do not forget to bring my old journals and whatever drawings of mine
(of birds) that thou may have. I have brought an excellent and beautiful gold watch for Victor; perhaps Mr. Berthoud [Victor’s employer] would permit him to take care of thee to Wheeling or to
Philadelphia. I will now pass to other subjects.

I have been received here with great kindness by the scientific men of New York,
Col. Trumbull,
Major Long, Mr. Cooper, &c., &c., have paid me many compliments. The collector of the Custom House gave me a permit to enter my books, gun &c., free of duty, and all the public institutions and exhibitions are open to me. I found my good old friend Dr. Pascallis quite well, his amiable daughter married and the mother of three sweet children. Dr. Mitchell [the former U.S. senator] is now lost to himself and to the world. I have seen him once, half dead with drunkenness. My immense book has been laid on the table of the Lyceum and looked at [and] praised and I may have one or two
subscribers here, a few more at Boston, Phila., &c. Should I procure 20 in the whole United States I will be proud of myself. I have seen Messrs. Walker and Sons and given them a letter from friend Wm. Rathbone; they will attend to the forwarding of my letters from England &c., direct to their care until I write to the contrary.

It was my intention to proceed to Phila. tomorrow—Monday, the 11th May—but the president of the Lyceum desired me to remain here a few days more and I will do so with hopes to have a subscriber or so. I have written to Mr. [Thomas] Sully to procure me a boarding house in a private family &c., and I expect his answer tomorrow. I will write to thee frequently, perhaps twice per week, until I hear from thee. I should like exceedingly to spend a week or two at Mr. Johnson’s with thee, but it cannot be, and probably forever my eyes will not rest on magnolia woods or see the mocking thrush gaily gamboling full of melody amongst the big trees of the South. A vessel arrived yesterday in 12 days from New Orleans, the news of which shook my frame as if electrified; to know that in so short a time I might again see my Lucy and press her to my heart is a blessing beyond anything I have felt since three years.

Thy sister Ann [Gordon] was quite well when I left. I had a letter from Mr. Gordon a few days before my sailing, and a week or 2 before, he called on me in London to view my paintings.
I have here a beautiful dog of [the] King Charles breed; I will try to send it to my old friend [Augustus] Bourgeat if I can prevail on any captain or passenger to take charge of it. Remember me most kindly to them all …

Philadelphia

18 July 1829

Not a word from you yet, my dear Victor. Where are you? What are you doing? Are you, as your Mother seems to be, quite unwilling to believe that I am doing all I can for the best for all of us; and in such a case have you abandoned the idea of ever answering my letters?

I have been in America now for two months and 13 days. I wrote to you on my landing, gave you my address, have written since several times, all in vain. It is neither kind as a man or dutiful as a son to keep such an extraordinary silence. Have you thought, as your Mother, that although I wrote that I could not go westerly or southerly that I would undoubtedly do so? If you have, undeceive yourself and believe me I cannot go either to Kentucky or to Louisiana and for the third time I will advert to my reasons for a different conduct.

I came to America with two views in thought. One, to engage your dear Mother to go to England with me if agreeable to herself; and secondly, to make a series of drawings such as I think necessary to enable me to continue my publication on the same plan and regulations that have existed since its beginning. I wrote to this effect to your Mamma, explained my plans as well as my poor style of writing will permit me to do, &c. Three long years have elapsed since I saw your Mamma, and about 5 since you and I walked together. My voyage to Europe has been as good a one as I could possibly have expected in the most enthusiastic of my moments. I landed there with 240 pounds of cash and two letters of recommendations from
Vincent Nolte, besides 2 from
Henry Clay. I have frequently wrote to you that I had been kindly received [and] highly honored, and formed a connection of valued and valuable friends (I might add, better friends than any excepting my Father and Mother) who advised me well and put me ultimately in a way of doing for you, your brother and mother what I always have longed to do.

I began my publication in the most difficult of times for an individual without money, and certainly have had a great share of trouble; but I have established my publication and it is looked upon as unrivaled. Two full years of my work are now before the public and the present year is going on well. My
subscribers have slowly but regularly increased, and when I left England I left behind me in stock of plates, copies of my work and monies due me and in Wm. Rathbone’s hands rather more than 1,200 pounds—I brought with me 150 pounds, a good double gun, excellent watch, wearing apparels, &c., with 2 copies bound of my “Birds of America” and a heart full of joy at being able to tread again the “Land of Liberty.” I felt as if the world smiled to me once more, and wrote to your Mother to join me as I would write to my only friend in the World. I wrote to you to say all this and more, and now I am with 2 letters of your Mother only.

Those two are full of doubt & fear, nay quite the contrary of what I expected. She is not able to come to me for the want of funds; neither can she collect any until fall or winter, and
I cannot go to her
because was I to lose my summer by so doing I would miss the birds that I want and that are not at all to be found west of the mountains. She does not seem to understand this; she complains of my want of affection; of the coolness of my style of writing, &c., and thinks that my not going to Louisiana for her is quite sufficient proof for all these her doubts and fears. Ever since I left her I never have had from her a letter containing the
facts of her situation
, never have known how much or how little she made or received; but on the contrary from her independent manner of expressing herself have always hoped that she was doing well and happy.

Now as a man of business I wish you to write to her, taking in consideration what I have said here and again what follows. I wish her to settle her business as soon as conveniently possible, to collect as much money as she can and arrange the remaining debts in such a way as may insure
you
the receiving of the greater portion after her departure. I wish her as soon as she can (again conveniently), to make her way up to Louisville in a steamboat and in the charge of a good, well-known commander, and from there to continue on to Pittsburgh by herself under some such same care, or under your
own if your time or your avocations or your engagements with Mr. Berthoud will permit—to Pittsburgh or to Wheeling (either). I will go and meet her (and I hope you also) and bring her to Philadelphia.

When I left London I had it in contemplation to have returned to England by the 1st of October from New York. Now that I know of your Mother that at all events she cannot join me before December or thereabouts, I have written to my engraver and my friendly agent, Mr. Children of the British Museum, to say to them that it was very probable that my sailing from New York would not take place before April or May next. Your Mamma is afraid, it appears, of traveling by herself. I remember having seen Mrs. Gordon leaving your “White House” [i.e., the
Nicholas Berthoud house in Shippingport] for New Orleans with a willing heart and apparently without further thoughts than those of soon being with her husband—why cannot your Mamma do the same? I have written to her that if absolutely necessary she might draw at sight on Messrs. Thomas E. Walker & Co., Merchants, in Philadelphia for 200 dollars; and during all the time I have been here have been closely engaged at work and have now 20 drawings finished which in England for my publication are positively worth 400 pounds! Every day is to me of the greatest importance, and if I can renew the 100 drawings which I wish to renew, I will feel happy on my account and for your sake and that of John, for whom both only I ultimately work so much at present.