The Almost Girl – ebook edition (43 page)

“Hey,” Caden’s voice is soft.

I turn slowly, my eyes widening, butterflies causing havoc in the pit of my stomach. It’s still not a feeling that I’m comfortable with… that any one person could make me feel so shattered and whole at the same time. Caden is magnificent in monarch purple and black, his long overcoat trimmed in sable. His hair has been combed back off his face, and his eyes are a sparkling green. He looks beautiful, perfect.

I find my voice. “You clean up good.”

“Thanks.”

“You look like a prince.”

“I feel like a weirdo,” Caden says with a grin. “I mean, have you
seen
this cape?”

I grin back. “Sadie would definitely approve.” The look in Caden’s eyes drives any other words about Sadie from my mouth.

“Do
you
approve?”

“Yes,” I say. “I definitely approve. You belong here, Cade. This is where you were meant to be; this is who you are.”

“I thought you wanted me to go back to my world,” Caden says, stepping forward to brush a strand of hair out of my face.

His light touch makes the butterflies take flight, and unconsciously, I lean into his caress. “At the time, it was the only place where you would have been safe from Cale. But everything worked out, didn’t it?”

“Riven,” Caden says, moving to stand directly in front of me, both his hands pressed to the sides of my face. “None of this could have happened without you, you know that, right? I mean, you’re the reason I’m here and alive. You’re the reason I even know who I am and what I’m meant to do.” Caden pauses, staring out at the throng of people below us. “The only reason I don’t feel like I don’t belong here is because of you. You made me fall in love with Neospes just like I’ve fallen–”

“Cade,” I interrupt him, blushing furiously. “You always had Neospes in your heart. It’s in your blood.”

“Will you let me finish?” he says, bending his head to graze my lips so softly that it’s barely a touch, but it silences me effectively.

“You know what happened the last time,” I breathe, my eyes fluttering closed, and tilt my face up to his, pressing my lips against his mouth. His hands slide into the hair at the nape of my neck, and he deepens the kiss, opening his mouth against mine. My fingers curl into the fur of his collar, pulling him closer. I never want to let him go.

That kiss says everything that Caden wants to say and more, and I kiss him back, leaving him with no doubt of my own feelings. Because now, more than ever, he needs to know how much I do love him, especially with what I know I have to do.

The loud sound of cheering breaks us apart, and we glance down to see the crowd below staring up at the parapet with their hands in the air.

“Go do your thing, Cade,” I say, drawing away from the edge of the stone balustrade. “I believe in you. And I will always be here.” I clutch my fist to my heart, the tears burning a pathway behind my eyelids and down my cheeks.

“Wait, why are you crying?” he says.

“Because I love you, and I’m so proud of you. Now go, address your people,” I say with a laugh, swiping my face with the back of my hand. “And stop making me say such reckless
feeling
things.”

Watching Caden address the crowd, I have no doubt that he will be a great leader, and with people like Aurela and Sauer at his side, he will unite the people of Neospes. I walk back to where Era and Aurela are standing. Era stares at me and I shift uncomfortably, but her stare is curious instead of anxious.

Even if she is Faction, I still don’t quite trust her. Maybe it’s the way her eyes seem to pierce right through me, or the fact that she is one of the most powerful women in our combined universes. No one person should have that much power. That said, it’s not like she ever abused her power. She stepped in where she had to.

And I know I’m going to need her help if I am to track down my father.

I feel Aurela’s arms encircle me from the side, and I lean into her, inhaling the scent of my childhood. My arms cross over my mother’s arms and I squeeze.

“Take care of him,” I tell her.

I punch in a sequence on the arm of my suit and pull out an eversion device from the pack at my side. Time is of the essence, and every second I delay here means my father will get further away. I meet Era’s eyes with a wry grin. I don’t need her serum – I can evert from anywhere just as the Vectors do.

Just another one of the perks of being a half-human, half-robot hybrid.

“Guess I’ll see you in physics class,” I say to her with a forced grin, even though it feels like my very bones are splintering inside of me.

My eyes flit from Aurela to Sauer to Caden… my family is no longer broken. It’s beautiful and it’s more real than anything I can imagine. I never thought it would be so hard to leave anyone, because I never had anyone to leave before.

No wonder people say that love begets weakness. It hurts like a beast. But I know that it isn’t weakness; it’s might. It takes far more strength to care. It makes you want to fight harder… to live for something worth believing in.

It makes you more.

As if he can sense what I’m about to do, Caden turns around, his eyes widening in delayed understanding. I smile to reassure him, but my lip quivers. I can’t even lie to not hurt him… all I can see is the pain in his eyes, those intense green eyes asking me why, pleading for me to stay.

But there’s no time for answers, no time for reasons. I can only smile and weep.

Everything fades to black, the fabric of time and space shimmering around me, but I hold on to Caden’s face. I hold on to his green eyes. I hold on to him and the weightless way he makes me feel. I hold on to the touch of his lips upon mine and the salt of his tears in our kiss. I hold on to love.

I know I will see him again.  

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS: THE ALMOST GIRL

 

To my fabulous and feisty Strange Chemistry editor, Amanda Rutter, who saw so much potential in The Almost Girl that she bought the duology, thank you so much for collaborating with me and letting me share this story with the world. It’s such an honor to be inducted into the nefarious ranks of the Strange Chemists! This book could not have found a more perfect home at Strange Chemistry, and for that I have to thank my warrior princess agent, Liza Fleissig of the Liza Royce Agency. I honestly cannot thank you enough for everything you do—your foresight, your enthusiasm, your drive and your passion are all astounding. I’m so grateful to have you in my corner.

To Kristi Cook—critique partner, friend, therapist, sidekick and partner in crime—thank you for being awesome. That is all. To my writing retreat group—Cindy, Danielle, Angie and Kate—who keep me full of inspiration and in good humor, thanks for your generous words of wisdom and your friendship. Without you, I’d be a hotter mess than usual. To my friend and fellow author, Kim Purcell, thanks for all the sanity checks and energetic conversations. To Jenny, thanks for the lunches, the brainstorming and the plotting—I’m starting to think we may need some super-villain masks. A big shout out to Julie, Marissa, Sami and Grace at JKS for their superhuman publicity efforts—thank you! To all the bloggers, booksellers and readers who spread the word about my books and humble me with their unwavering support, I wouldn’t be here without you. Thanks for doing all that you do.

To my extended family, friends and fans, a heartfelt thank you for being such amazing champions. Much gratitude to my parents, who always encouraged me to fuel my voracious imagination and to push the boundaries of possibility. Thank you for never holding me back. To my brothers, thanks for always looking out no matter what. Lastly, to the loves of my life—Cameron, Connor, Noah and Olivia—thank you for making no other universe equal this one.

   

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Seventeen Magazine Summer Club
author Amalie Howard grew up on a small Caribbean island where she spent most of her childhood with her nose buried in a book. Twenty-two countries, surfing with sharks and several tattoos later, she has traded in bungee jumping in China for writing the adventures she imagines instead. She isn’t entirely convinced which takes more guts.

and a member of the Osprey Group

Lace Market House,

54-56 High Pavement,

Nottingham

NG1 1HW

UK

Angry Robot/Osprey Publishing,

Strange Chemistry #22

A Strange Chemistry paperback original 2014

Copyright © Amalie Howard 2014

Amalie Howard asserts the moral right to be

identified as the author of this work.

Cover art by Steven Wood

Distributed in the United States by Random House, Inc., New York.

All rights reserved.

Angry Robot is a registered trademark and Strange Chemistry, the Strange Chemistry icon and the Angry Robot icon are trademarks of Angry Robot Ltd.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Sales of this book without a front cover may be unauthorized. If this book is coverless, it may have been reported to the publisher as “unsold and destroyed” and neither the author nor the publisher may have received payment for it.

US ISBN: 978 1 90884 480 4

UK ISBN: 978 1 90884 479 8

Ebook ISBN: 978 1 90884 481 1

Set in Meridien and Dirty Headline by Argh! Oxford

Printed in the United States of America

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