The Alaskan Rescue (12 page)

“It’s the only one. I was hardly going to take you to a bar and
buy you a beer.” Cole reached over and fingered a lock of her hair. “I know
you’re from the East Coast. They have a different mentality than we do up here
in Alaska.”

Sashi turned and faced him. Their eyes locked and she was
completely caught up in his gaze. “I’m learning to love a lot of things about
Alaska. I like the casualness and the easygoing natures of the people I’ve
met.”

“I’m glad. It’s good to know you don’t hate Alaska after your
experience.”

Sashi took his comment in to think about later as the valet
opened her door. In a flash Cole was at her side and soon the aroma of Italian
food filled her nostrils. The layout and design of the restaurant—stone floors
and stucco walls decorated with fake flowers—screamed Italian, and she was
utterly charmed.

A dark-haired man of medium height swept into the room. “
Dottore.
Welcome to my
ristorante.
”

“It’s good to see you, Luigi. How are you doing? How’s your
family?”

“
Bene, bene.
Life is good to me.
Ah, I see you’ve brought a
bellissima
woman to my
place. I will prepare special meal for both of you. No charge.”

Sashi looked at the owner and could see the great affection he
had for Cole. “Luigi, do tell me how you two know each other.”

“For you,
bella,
anything! Dr. Cole
delivered our last baby in his car in the middle of a snowstorm. It was
December.”

Sashi’s heart brimmed over with feelings for Cole. Dinner out
at this restaurant and now this story...it seemed Cole was the town hero.
Certainly he was
her
hero. “I believe it. Cole saved
me, too. He’s quite the miracle worker.”

Luigi nodded. “I go now to make your meal. I’ll have my hostess
seat you at our best table.”

Her thank-you and Cole’s came out at the same time.

Soon they were ushered to a secluded table, lit by candlelight
and overlooking the water. Cole seated Sashi, then sat across from her.

Over the next hour, as they sipped an excellent red wine, Luigi
delivered course after delicious course. At last Sashi sat back in her chair,
replete.

“I love the cooking of southern Italy, all the seafood,” she
said. “I was a fool to think at first it wouldn’t work up here, but of course it
would. There’s no better fish than up here in Alaska. Thank you for this
delicious meal.”

Cole had ordered cappuccinos for them both, and after a sip, he
said, “Sashi, I have something I need to ask you.”

“What?” She felt so relaxed and happy in this serene
environment. In that moment she realized she wanted a life with Cole in Alaska.
She could open her dance studio here and they could be together. At this point
in their relationship that could be wishful thinking. She had issues to deal
with—the guilt about Kendra and her anger at Freddy. And those needed to be
taken care of first, didn’t they? Not to mention going home to Virginia and
facing the Knights. She had to ask them to forgive her for not taking better
care of Kendra. She also needed to thank them for paying her medical costs. She
never could have afforded the care herself. Her brow furrowed in
consternation.

* * *

C
OLE
HAD
BEEN
ABOUT
TO
SAY
what he wanted to say so desperately from his
heart. But as he looked at Sashi, he could tell she was tired and had something
else on her mind. He would talk to her later tonight.

“Are you up for watching the movie Dr. Samuelson recommended
tonight?”

Her eyes shone with happiness at that suggestion. “Yeah, let’s
get out of here. I feel stuffed.” Sashi patted her flat stomach. Those green
eyes flashed back at his. “The food was delicious and the company was
wonderful.”

Cole’s body raged with desire for her. Didn’t she know how her
words toyed with his emotions? The last thing he wanted to do was go home and
watch a movie. But he knew how fragile everything was. He needed to play his
hand carefully so as not to scare her away.

“All right, let’s get going.”

* * *

S
ASHI
HAD
TO
BEAT
C
OLE
to the couch in the TV room. She snuggled into
one corner so Cole wouldn’t feel obliged to sit beside her. It was a
self-protective measure, for there’d been other nights when he’d chosen to sit
in the middle of the sofa.

Sashi heard a door close and watched Cole come down the stairs
in sweats and T-shirt. His biceps bulged out the sleeves and his brawny
shoulders were to die for. As he came closer, she noticed his unshaven face and
slightly mussed hair. All she could think about now was kissing the man
senseless.

She watched him quickly load the movie, then was surprised when
he asked out right, “Mind if I sit close to you tonight?” With that he sat down
right next to her. He reached over the leather couch and grabbed another throw
blanket.

Sashi was a person who liked being busy. But since the
encounter with the bear, it was unbelievable how much TV and how many movies
she’d watched. She also couldn’t believe how hard it was to sit so close to the
man she was in love with and do nothing about it. Inside she felt warm, as if
heated honey was running through her veins. She was aware of every movement and
gesture he made.

Right before the scene they’d discussed in therapy came on,
Cole reached over and pulled her tight into the warmth of his embrace. The
intoxicating scent of cologne, the feel of his arm around her body, the
occasional caress of her neck...if she thought she was warm before, she was a
five-alarm fire now!

The sensual feelings caused her to breathe a sigh and press her
body into his touch. Suddenly the TV was off and Cole’s lips were on her neck.
She shivered and angled back for him to kiss her more. The touch of his lips on
her throat, her jaw, began to drive her wild.

Cole adjusted her body and gently laid her down beneath him.
Sashi looked into those golden eyes and believed she’d found paradise. The raw
desire he apparently felt for her was her complete undoing. Her hands reached up
to grasp his jaw and bring his lips down on hers. There was an ache only he
could satisfy and she knew it.

“Sashi...” Cole spoke with a husky voice. His mouth was just a
few inches from her face. “I wanted to talk to you tonight but—”

One of Sashi’s fingers moved to seal his lips. “Shh. Right now
I don’t want to talk.” She drew his face down and began to kiss his jaw. She
loved the feel of the bristles. Here was a real man, a man she could trust and
depend on. Her hero.

She could tell Cole was done with her light play. He tipped her
head up with one of his hands and brought his mouth to hers. Sashi felt an
explosion of heat and lost all thought except to deepen the kiss. Their tongues
met and danced.

Cole pulled her closer and closer until they were one. He
rubbed her back, then put his hand underneath her shirt. It was only when he was
about to touch her breasts she pulled away.

* * *

C
OLE
FELT
S
ASHI
STOP
. In seconds he was up and off her.
What in
hell just happened?
Out of the corner of his eye he saw her sit up
and turn to face him in an old T-shirt and hospital scrubs for pants.

“Sashi, what is it? Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you?”
Cole was fighting to get his emotions under control. This is why he’d stayed
away. He knew Sashi had problems. He’d been a fool to make a move on her
tonight. Why hadn’t he listened to Daniel and talked to her first?

The longer he looked at her, the more pensive her face grew.
When she was finally ready to talk, her eyes were sad. Cole cursed himself. Why
hadn’t he just let things continue the way they were—hands off.

“I’m sorry, Cole. It’s not you. I haven’t been intimate with a
man in a long time. My mind started racing with stuff like, how will this affect
our living together? I’m sorry. I still have so much to do before I leave
Alaska. And then there’s the problem of how I’ll handle leaving you....”

Cole sat back and folded his arms. Of course she would have
these concerns. So did he. So why did he make that mistake and push the limit
when he had no idea yet what would come of their relationship? But what were the
other things she had to do before she left Alaska?

“I’m the one who’s sorry,” he said. “I want to help you with
all the things you need to do before you leave Alaska.”

“I shouldn’t impose on you any more.”

He shook his head. “Sashi, from the moment we met there’s been
an incredible chemistry between us. I’ve never felt anything like it before. I
know you live on the other side of the country and have another life planned
out, but until you leave, I want you to know I’ll help in whatever way I
can.”

Tears filled Sashi’s eyes. “You’ve done everything for me. I
owe you so much and I can’t thank you enough. Right now I don’t know about my
future. There are things I need to take care of.”

“Listen to me,” he said. “Don’t you realize that by helping
you, it helps me to heal, too?” Cole searched her eyes for understanding. He
could tell she was giving in when she leaned back against the sofa.

“I need to continue to learn to forgive myself for what
happened to Kendra,” she responded. “I don’t know if I will ever be able to have
a healthy relationship with a man if I don’t. I have anger toward Freddy and
have to face him, Cole. I’ve made some inquiries, but apparently no one has seen
him lately at Marshall’s.”

“I know the law can’t hurt him,” Cole said, “but the Knights
called yesterday with the DNA results on the baby’s father. It’s Freddy. Thank
heaven Trace listened to you and took a sample when they were investigating the
bear attack. Freddy had such a hangover at the cabin, I don’t think he knew what
he was saying yes to.” Cole paused and looked at her. “Now, is there anything
else?”

She nodded. “I need to find a way to say thank you to the
Knights. I hope one day they will forgive me, too.”

“I’ll help you as much as I can with finding Freddy and a way
to thank the Knights, but the Knights don’t have anything to forgive you
for.
They don’t hold you responsible. They’ve heard
how you threw yourself in front of the bear to protect Kendra. This is something
you need to discuss with Dr. Samuelson.”

“Fair enough,” she murmured. “Cole?” There was panic in her
voice.

“Yes?”

“How did you face going back into the wilderness again? I love
the outdoors and I know I need to conquer my fear, but how am I going to do
it?”

“That’s one problem I can help you with. In our next group
therapy session I’ll tell you and Daniel my idea.”

A faint smile crossed her lips. “Thanks for being so
understanding tonight. I feel lucky to have you in my life.”

Her compliment was proof that the connection they had was real
and special. He just needed to give her that time to heal. And he knew exactly
how he was going to help her.

Chapter Eight

It had been a week since that night on Cole’s couch.
They had gone back to being friends, if you could call it that, Sashi thought.
She wished she had more answers. Her heart was ready to marry, to open her
studio and to have kids. Unfortunately the timing was off. She had to fix
herself before she could get involved. But the idea of distancing herself from
Cole was killing her. She was walking a slippery slope.

Today after group therapy Sashi was going to see the orthopedic
surgeon. Hopefully her cast could come off today. It dawned on her that she’d
been living with Cole for over two months. If she was doing as well as the
doctor thought, then she’d be able to fly home in a week or two. But the mere
thought of leaving Cole made her feel sick.

The kitchenette door opened and Dr. Samuelson walked in with a
steaming cup of coffee.

“Do you ever miss New York?” Sashi asked.

He gave her a big smile and nodded. “Yes, that’s why I fly
there as often as I can.”

“There is something wonderful about the big city, isn’t there?
But I’m also learning to love Ketchikan and the beauty of nature out here.”

“They’re definitely two different worlds. So tell me what’s
going on with you. Cole will be here as soon as he can.”

The door flew open and a flustered Cole in scrubs walked
in.

“It’s good to see you, Cole. We were just about to start,” Dr.
Samuelson said in his deep, steady voice. Go ahead, Sashi.”

“Well...I wanted to discuss my anger. I have a lot of anger
built up. I’m finding myself consumed with rage against Freddy Marshall. The
Knights have proof that he’s the father. I feel the need to confront him. Tell
him how I feel. That if he hadn’t denied that the child was theirs, Kendra
wouldn’t have run out into the night. I would have been able to stop her before
she went too far and we would never be in this situation.”

The doctor cocked his head. “I want to tell you two stories of
different Holocaust survivors. One is the story of a man called Primo Levi. He
survived Auschwitz. Yet the rest of his life he was a ghost of a man, letting
the memory of the concentration camps control him. He may have lived a long
life, but his death was thought to be a suicide. It’s been said that Primo died
in Auschwitz.

“The other story is about a seventeen-year-old woman named
Judith Strick. Once she was freed from Auschwitz, she joined the Russian army,
but then requested to move to Israel and there she married and became a
housewife. She’d purged herself of all the anger and guilt. Judith was ready to
move on.

“I think it’s very important for both of you to face any anger
you feel and combat it in a way that will make you feel better.”

“That’s what I want to do!” Sashi exclaimed. “After learning
what can happen to people if they carry this guilt and anger around and do
nothing about it, I know I need to find Freddy.”

Cole spoke up. “I can see I need to do some work on my own,
too. I’ve believed that my parents have always been angry at me for what
happened. I’ve feared they thought I could have done more. I need to talk with
them and see if this is true. I’ve isolated myself for the past twenty years
now. It’s time to move forward.”

Dr. Samuelson wrote everything down as fast as possible on his
yellow pad of paper. When he glanced up, Cole said to him, “How else can Sashi
and I let go of this guilt?”

The doctor nodded. “All right. I’d like both of you to write
letters to the loved ones you’ve lost. When you’re ready, I want you to share
them with someone in a meaningful place. Let yourself be forgiven. Remember
their deaths were the result of circumstances,
not
your wrongdoing.”

“Okay,” Sashi said, “but just one more thing. How do I face
going back out into the great outdoors?”

Dr. Samuelson sat forward in his chair and eyed her frankly.
“You just go out there and face your fears. It’s just like riding a bike. You’re
surrounded by people who care and know the area well. I’m sure you can find
someone to take you into the wilderness.”

“I’ll be happy to take you,” Cole said. “I know a beautiful
place this time of year.”

“It’s settled, then. I’ll see you back next Tuesday. Have a
great weekend and good luck with your homework.”

* * *

W
HILE
C
OLE
RETURNED
TO
the E.R., Sashi headed to the
orthopedic doctor’s office. When she used her crutches to step into the
examining room, an older man who looked like a mountaineer walked in. Sashi’s
adrenaline surged. Here was the man who would tell her if she could have her
cast removed. She hoped this part of the healing process was over.

“Hello, Sashi,” Dr. Meers said. “Let’s get some final X-rays. I
think we’ll be taking that cast off today.”

“That’s wonderful! Finally some good news!”

“Remember, your leg will be a bit atrophied. But with continued
therapy, you’ll be dancing in no time.”

The rest of the afternoon passed quickly with further X-rays to
make sure the bone had healed correctly. The cast came off and as he’d said, her
leg and foot looked shriveled and weak. But no matter. She knew how to train.
She’d come this far and she would heal. As for the inside of her, only time
would tell.

Cole was stuck in the E.R., so Sashi tagged along with Mary.
She loved going with Mary to pick up Abigail from school. That little girl had a
million dance questions and Sashi wished she could show her all the moves. One
day she hoped to send Abigail a DVD answering those questions. Her time with the
little girl crystallized her desire to pursue her dream and open her dance
studio for children.

* * *

“A
RE
YOU
EXCITED
?” C
OLE
flashed Sashi a brilliant smile as he piloted his Cessna toward
Humpback Lake in the Misty Fjords National Monument.

Excited was only part of what Sashi was feeling. She was also
very grateful to him for helping her face her fears out in the bush.

It was such a new feeling to be taken care of so completely.
She wondered what he had planned. Before they’d boarded the plane, she saw he’d
loaded the rear with some items.

In khakis and a blue fleece pullover, he looked as though he
could be a male model on a cover for a outerwear magazine. He was always full of
surprises. Watching him made her heart skip all over the place. She had no idea
how she’d leave him once she’d healed physically and mentally. That was
something she would have to face when the time came.

Needing to redirect her thoughts, she looked out the window.
The sight took her breath away. They were flying over a sea of mountain peaks
covered in pine trees. No wonder people loved the country up here. She’d
forgotten how green the Tongass rain forest was.

Just over the horizon she saw a sea-green body of water shining
in the sun. As the Cessna drew closer, it began its descent to the lake, which
sat in the valley between enormous forested peaks that rose thousands of feet
into the sky.

Cole made a perfect landing, taxiing to a cabin tucked up
against a peak hidden away from the world. The two-story cabin with a porch had
a beautiful waterfall only twenty feet behind it. This had to be one of the most
beautiful places on earth. Ferns and lichen surrounded the cabin, creating a
lush atmosphere that was romantic beyond belief. Too romantic for the man who’d
been treating her as a friend, she thought, but definitely a good choice for
helping her to not be afraid of going into the backcountry.

The plane pulled up to the dock. Cole killed the power, then
jumped out and tied everything up. “You stay put,” he said. “I’m going to go
check the cabin out to make sure it’s safe. I’ll be right back.” He grabbed a
couple of bags and his gun from the rear of the plane. “Shouldn’t be longer than
five minutes.”

“Sounds good to me.” Sashi watched as the man she loved trekked
to the cabin and disappeared inside. She bit her lip and thought how safe she
felt out here with Cole. He was an amazing man. Again she wondered how she would
ever be able to walk away from him and the wonderful life here.

* * *

C
OLE
ENTERED
THE
CABIN
he and Jake had
used a few times when they’d been fishing. He’d always thought it was the kind
of getaway a woman would appreciate. Heading to the stove, he got the fire going
to make the place toasty.

What would Sashi think? Would she like this place? He hoped it
would help allay some of her fears.

She was a sophisticated woman, used to big cities like New York
and the warmer climes of Virginia. Would she ever really be happy here? Or would
he be willing to leave all this and go southeast to start a new life with her?
He knew he was thinking too far ahead. For now they both had to heal. Hopefully
they’d do it together.

He put the picnic basket full of goodies on the table. Time to
go get her. When he walked outside, he was hit by the beauty of the state he
lived in. He loved Alaska. This land of mountains and sea was in his blood. It
brought joy to his heart and made his spirits soar.

Smiling, he approached the plane. In the passenger seat sat the
woman he loved. A beautiful woman inside and out. Today she wore a white fleece
jacket and form-fitting jeans with her feet tucked into boots. She’d done her
hair in some sort of thick braid with free pieces hanging over her shoulder.

“You look sensational today,” he said when he reached her.

Her head went back and she looked at him as if he was crazy.
“Thanks,” she said with a small smile.

“Let’s get you out of here and into the cabin. Then you can
move around on crutches.”

Sashi bit her lip. “Can I ask you a favor?”

Cole’s brows lifted in curiosity. “Sure.”

“Could you take me to that waterfall?” She pointed. “It looks
unreal.”

It took some time, but Sashi managed to get to the waterfall
with the help of her crutches and Cole’s strong arm.

She found herself a bit bewildered by the change in Cole out
here in the woods. He appeared so relaxed, he melded with the landscape. “I can
tell you love it out here,” she said.

Cole nodded. “You’re absolutely right. There’s nothing in the
world like the rain forest up here.”

“Thank you for bringing me and sharing this beautiful place. I
haven’t felt nervous at all.”

He brought his hand up to touch her cheek. “I’m glad.”

* * *

I
F
LIFE
HAD
BEEN
DIFFERENT
and the bear attack hadn’t happened, would she and Cole
have found their way to each other? Quite possibly. After all, they’d had a
connection before the accident. But the attack had made their relationship take
a turn she didn’t fully understand.

She decided to focus on the sheer beauty of this place, as they
wended their way through the ferns and pines. It was almost unreal. The
cascading waterfall might have come right out of a fairy tale.

“It’s pure magic out here,” she said.

“I couldn’t agree more,” he said.

Their eyes met. His seemed to darken. “The day isn’t over yet.”
With those words he gave her a quick kiss on her lips. The sensation on her
mouth made her warm all over, causing her to lose concentration. Then some
raindrops struck her face. “How could it be raining?” she cried in surprise. She
looked up at the sky, amazed that a storm had rolled in so quickly.

“I was hoping it might do that.” Cole looked excited. “Let’s
get inside before it starts to pour.”

He scooped her up, crutches and all, and made a beeline for the
cabin. Just as they entered, the heavens let loose and the rain came down
fiercely, pelting the roof and the windows. Cole put her down at the
picnic-style table. Sashi was grateful he’d already started a fire. The warmth
from the stove had already put out heat and the cabin felt cozy.

She looked at him. “Just out of curiosity,” she asked, “why
were you hoping it would rain?”

“I’ll show you in a little while. For now you need to trust
me.”

Sashi trusted him completely. Still, she wondered what he was
up to. It wasn’t like him to be coy.

* * *

C
OLE
HAD
REACHED
AN
IMPASSE
. How was he going to tell her that he’d distanced himself
from her because he didn’t want to take advantage of her when she was
vulnerable? For the first time in his life he needed to let his guard down with
a woman, put his heart on the line and tell her that he loved her. What else
could he do?

“Are you hungry?” he asked. “I’ve packed us a delicious
meal.”

Sashi laughed. “You made us a meal?”

That laugh was music to his soul. It showed how relaxed she was
here, how happy she was. He traced an index finger down her cheek. “No. I had it
delivered to the plane from a delicatessen in town. They import excellent
food.”

The look of shock on Sashi’s face was priceless. “Why would you
do this for me?”

“Because you’re special and I wanted this day to be
unforgettable.”

Her green eyes turned translucent as they misted over. Cole
could tell she was touched. He opened the basket and pulled out a checkered
red-and-white tablecloth, which he spread out over the table.

Then he began to pull out the other items in the basket: a
fresh baguette, a variety of cheeses, fresh fruit, a decadent chocolate torte,
plates, utensils, champagne and flutes to drink from.

* * *

“C
OLE
,
THIS
IS
WONDERFUL
!”

“I hoped it would be. So how are you feeling now? Nervous?”

“No. Very content.”

When she looked out the window, she saw the reason Cole had
hoped for rain. There were waterfalls cascading down the mountain in every
direction she looked, fed by the downpour. And now that the fast-moving storm
was passing and the sun was peeking out, multiple rainbows had formed over the
falls. She turned to Cole.