THE AFFAIR (36 page)

For an answer, he held me and I held on him to him. Yes, maybe I was willing to let go of the man in my dreams because of my commitment, my guilt, my promises, but weren’t those all a part of love?

Chapter Sixteen

I stood at last looking toward the huge oak doors. I had walked over every inch of the house, touching everything, imprinting it on my soul.

For the last hour Chance had stopped talking to me, though his eyes followed me around the rooms pleading with me to reconsider.

I saved the rocker for last. Going to it I sat and closed my eyes, touching the well worn wood that Chance kept polished, allowing the luster to shine through. It was an extremely well made chair to have survived the ravages of time.

I must have sat there for fifteen minutes before I opened my eyes to find Chance only a foot or two away staring at me. Chance’s eyes were dark and piercing. He had no need to tell me what he was feeling. I knew. I was feeling it too.

I didn’t know how to utter the words goodbye. I thought of saying, ‘We’ll meet again, but it didn’t seem right.

I took a step toward the door. J
ust a few more
, I thought
. I can do this.

“Dimi.”

Chance’s voice called out to me, filling me with utter despair. I felt a breeze blow through the room though the windows were closed. The winds of change. I’d always thought it only a figure of speech, but not any more. I felt it on my face.

I turned to face Chance, watching as he seemingly glided toward me on a pillow of air. In an instant he was beside me.

I reached out my hand to caress his cheek. “Jeremy,” I said to Chance. “Although this is my decision to make, you hold the power to make me stay. Please don’t use that power against me. Release me, my love. Let me go.”

It was an excuse, we both knew it, but it was an excuse my heart could believe. “Yes,” I answered Chance, allowing my body to sag into his. “I should have thought of this myself. He’s helped me so much.”

“I’m glad he was able to help you see that you had been paying attention to your driving when you had the accident with Viola. That was unwarranted guilt. I’m glad you no longer have it.”

“So am I.”

“Are you planning on visiting her?”

“I thought of Larry and his need to protect me. “I’m not sure. Right now that isn’t the most important thing I have to do. Repairing my marriage, making amends to my children and finding a way to rid myself of this huge karmic debt in preparation for the next life are the things I have to concern myself with.” I looked at this man whom I had loved more than life. Hurting him wasn’t what I wanted but being with him in the next life was.

We were finding words to fill the space, to lessen the pain. The task was futile, but still we tried. I felt the electrical current making its way up my legs and moved away from Chance. “Do you want to call Blaine or shall I?”

“I’ll do it,” Chance answered, moving away from me also. I went back to my rocker to listen to the call. I heard Chance’s end of the conversation.

Chance looked at me again, and he gave a snort of disgust apparently to something Blaine had said. He held the phone out to me. “Blaine wants to talk to you.”

Taking the phone from Chance I tried looking at him but he refused to hold my gaze and looked away. With great sadness I turned my attention to my other son. “Hi, Blaine,” I said knowing the reason he wanted to speak to me.

Blaine didn’t answer. He probably was trying to figure out how his predictions hadn’t come true. I had known all along what he thought was going to happen.

“Blaine, psychics are not right all the time, even very gifted ones. Only God is.”

“Do I fall under the very gifted?” he teased.

“That depends,” I teased right back. Our relationship would remain intact. We’d just proven that. “So where do you want us to meet?”

“Michelle, are you really sure about this?” The worry had crept back into Blaine’s voice.

“I’m sure.” I laughed at the little boy longing I’d sensed in Blaine “Just tell me where you want to spend the day. Whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go, we await as your humble servants to fulfill your wish.”

“Anywhere I say?”

“Anywhere,” I answered.

“In that case,” Blaine hesitated, “don’t meet me. I’ll come there. If you really mean it and you think you can handle it, I’d love to spend the day with the two of you surrounded by your things from the past. That would make me feel we’re a family.”

I should have known. Either I’d walked right into that or he’d set me up. I wasn’t sure which.

I turned to Chance. “Jeremy,” I called to him, surprising him and myself that I’d once again used that name. Blaine wants to spend the day here, with us. Can you handle it?” I asked, not seeing how either of us possibly could.

He stared at me, his gaze forcing me to turn away. It felt like forever before he answered.

“Yes, that would be perfect.”

My face felt as if it was on fire. I had no idea why I should be blushing. A thin film of sweat beaded my upper lip which I wiped away. Chance stared at me as I did so. I saw the hunger in his eyes, felt it in the electricity that vibrated between us.

Then I heard Blaine calling me. I was unaware that I had dropped the phone from my ear as I stared back into Chance’s heated gaze.

He heard it and understood. “I’ll be there as soon as I can. I have something for both you and Chance and it’s not here. I have to go and pick it up.”

“Okay. See you when you get here.” I wanted to urge him to hurry, but Chance was staring at me.

“Is there a problem?” he asked.

“Not really,” I answered, wanting instead to say, yes, there’s a very big problem. But I didn’t. “It will be a couple of hours before Blaine can come. He has an errand he has to attend to first.”

The heat in Chance’s eyes became stronger. “I’m sure we’ll be fine for two hours.”

Oh yeah, right. I was barely holding on by a thread. Two hours more to delay the inevitable. Even now that magical current that always surrounded us was snaking its way toward me, tweaking my cells with its vibrations.

Stay here for another two hours with a man who could turn me into a towering inferno of molten passion and undeniable love? I didn’t think so. I damn sure wasn’t made of stone. I looked into his eyes. And neither was he.

I walked past Chance, almost running in my haste. “I’m going back to the hotel to shower and change. Blaine knows I had this on yesterday.”

That’s just what I was afraid of. There was no way I was going to be in the house alone with that man and have nothing happen. If either of us believed that, then we both could make a fortune writing fairy tales.

“Coward,” he called after me.

Exactly two hours later, I returned to Chance, showered and dressed in fresh clothes. I heaved a sigh of relief at the sight of Blaine’s car sitting in Chance’s drive.

I knocked on the door knowing I didn’t have to. It wasn’t expected that I would. I hoped that by doing so it would send a subtle message to all three of us. I did not belong here.

Blaine opened the door, leaning only close enough to kiss my cheek. He smiled at me, ushering me in. The instant I stepped over the threshold, I knew something was different.

My eyes scanned the room. My rocker was gone. “Where did you put it?” I questioned Chance forgetting that the rocker really belonged to him and as such, he could do with it what he pleased.

Chance looked at me from hooded eyes. “I’m giving it away.”

His face and voice were both serious. I wondered why Blaine was wearing an amused smile. Didn’t he know what the chair meant to me?

“If you were going to get rid of the chair you could have told me. I would have bought it from you.”

My tone was haughty, but I didn’t care. I glanced at these two men that I was going to spend the day with. One with a sullen face, the other amused.

Okay, Michelle he’s trying to get back at you. Ignore him. This day is for Blaine, to give him a family for the next few hours
.

I walked toward the kitchen. I’d almost forgotten I hadn’t eaten. Whatever Chance was cooking smelled delicious. My stomach rumbled as I came closer to the source of the delicious aromas.

“I thought you only cooked Chinese?” I said to Chance as my hand reached over his for a taste. The delicious morsel in my mouth, I stopped, tilting my head slightly as I caught sight of a huge packing box in the family room. There was an enormous lavender bow perched gingerly on top, looking as if it might fall at any moment.

At the same moment Chance reached for my wrist, holding me in place. He narrowed his eyes into slits, spearing me with his gaze.

“What did you think I had done with your chair? It seems like you forgot more than the fact that I love you. If you’re that forgetful, how are you ever going to remember having loved me at all?”

Blaine stepped between us. He took my wrist from Chance’s grip. “I think I have something that might help,” he said as he led me to the family room and my gift-wrapped chair.

I watched as he pulled a heavy black velvet bag from his pocket. He dumped the contents on the coffee table. “Chance, come on in,” he called to Chance, who was still in the kitchen watching us.

Blaine took the locket from my hand to show me the intricate details and the different stones. He pointed out to me that the stones in the bracelets were perfect matches. The locket had one huge diamond in the center. It looked to be a perfect cut, two carats.

“I’ve never seen stones like these.”

“I’m sure you have seen them in a past life. Blaine stared at Me then smiled. “I’ve chosen each of these stones for the properties they emit. They are all good stones for recapturing lost memories. The Brandburg quartz crystal will help us rediscover our past life. The purple fluorite, spiritual growth and channeling of information.

“This one, he said pointing to another stone, “is unakite, it helps in past life healing. The rainbow obsidion, is for karmic healing. It will also relay to you your purpose for being in the next incarnation. The azurite is for psychic travel and connecting with other psychics and loved ones. The green calcite is used as a bridge through time. And the amber is for healing, love and so many things that I will teach you later, Michelle.”