The Absolution of Aidan (The Syndicate Series Book 3) (10 page)

I become more alert and creep forward when she brings him up onto her shoulder. His little head lies down, but his eyes, those eyes that look just like mine have now found me. He lifts his head to the best of his ability, which causes Deidre to glance my way.

I may as well get this shit over with. Let her know I’m not budging one goddamn inch on what I’m about to say.

“You’re good with him, Deidre,” I announce. She smiles but makes no attempt to reply.

Her guard is back up. I get it. We haven’t seen each other for a year and the last time we did, we were both going through hell. Before that, extremely harsh words were exchanged between the two of us. Our bodies may respond to each other in such a way that we want to rip each other’s clothes off and fuck until we can no longer fuck, but our minds need to catch up. Be on the same level. This is why what I’m going to say to her next is going to piss her the hell off. Make her go out of her ever-loving mind.

I move across the living room and sit in a chair opposite of her. I remember this chair very well. Big, overstuffed beige leather with a matching ottoman. The only chair big enough to fit my huge frame.

“Do you want to hold him?” Something in the way she says
him
has me sitting up straighter, ready to spit my words out.

“I’m moving in here.” Her stare becomes wild. While mine stays calm, sincere, and ready to throw down with her if I have to.

“Like hell you are.” Her words are clipped, angry, and full of that smart fucking mouth I’d give anything to stick something into, preferably my cock, just to get her to shut up and listen to what I have to say.

“It’s not up for discussion. I want, no, I need to get to know him, and I’m not doing the visitation shit. Hell, I can’t take care of him by myself.” I arch my brow in challenge to her.

“You can come and see him whenever you want to, Aidan, but you and I both know we cannot live under the same roof together.” She glares at me. I glare back with a devilish smirk.

“That’s bullshit and you know it. Things are different now. We have him.” I jerk my chin in her direction.

“All we do is fight. Plus, you’re a pig. You leave shit everywhere.” She stands then lays Diesel on a blanket on the floor. I watch in adoration as he lifts his head with every bit of strength he has and peaks up in my direction. Screw it, I’ll use him as bait to lure her ass in, to make her see I’m right. I lower myself to the floor, position my body on my side next to him, and run my hand through his dark hair.

“I’ll clean up after myself and I’ll stay out of your way, but I need this and so does he.” I know she’s killing me with those eyes. Plotting away my murder. I can feel it. I say no more. Instead, I play with my boy. Talk to him. Tell him all the things we’re going to do together. Make him promises I vow not to break. After what seems like fucking forever, I finally look her way. She’s watching our interaction with intensity. I can tell right away I have her right where I want her. At this particular moment, it has nothing to do with me and her, and everything to do with me being with my son.

“You’re right. He’s yours as much as he is mine, but… I have a few stipulations.” Her jaw juts out and her eyes grow large. My cock twitches. The big boy loves her sass as much as I do.

“Name them.” I remove my hand from my son, who now has the corner of his blanket shoved into his mouth, and stand, placing my feet firmly in front of her, leaving her no choice but to look up at me.

Her breath catching does not go unnoticed due to my proximity. Nor does the fact that my cock is practically level with that fucking mouth of hers. I smirk. She puffs out a steaming breath of air.

“That kiss in the hallway will not happen again. You’re here to get to know him. And this is definitely not permanent.” I chuckle, which I can tell pisses her off by the way those once large eyes turn into small slits. Christ, every expression on her face is so damn beautiful.

I do the first thing that comes to my mind. I bend down, placing my hands on each side of her head, caging her in, placing my mouth an inch or so from hers.

“That is where you’re wrong, Deidre. That kiss wasn’t a mistake. You wanted it as much as I did. You’re the one who initiated that kiss. You want me to kiss you now, and I know for a damn fact that if I touched your sweet pussy, it would be drenched.” I reach down and grab her hand, placing it on my rock hard dick.

“What are you doing?” she hisses.

“Showing you what you do to me. You make me so fucking hard.” I then dive in for the kill. Taking hold of a handful of her hair, tilting her head back, I lick her neck, deliberately slowly and teasingly light. Once I reach her chin, I begin to kiss her, stopping shy of the corner of her mouth. Lord help me, those sweet to my ear noises escaping her mouth mixed with her sweet smell send a firestorm through my body.

“I’ll be back in a few hours,” I whisper in her ear. I know with certainty I have her. She never once took her hand off my cock until I stepped away from her. She can lie, disagree, and deny us all she wants. I will have her and I won’t stop until she is mine.

DEIDRE

“What in the hell?” I lay my head back against the couch. “Shit.” This sudden turn of events has my head floating around somewhere in orbit. Out of control.

My faithless body is deceiving me. Just hearing Aidan’s voice turns me the hell on. Now he’s moving in here? Christ, if I could lift my leg up and kick my own ass for agreeing to let him stay here, I would.

He knows his way around a woman’s body, that’s for damn sure. And his tongue…Good lord, it’s like a lizard’s. I remember all too well the way he flicked, licked, and then sucked up every bit of my orgasm, making me scream and beg for him to stop his relentless assault on my pussy.

I’m so screwed, in more ways than the pleasurable one. I know damn well I shouldn’t be thinking of sex with Aidan at all, yet here I sit with my arousal soaking through my panties.

We have a child together, a beautiful little boy, and that’s it. Well, I don’t mean it quite like that. Diesel is my entire world. He’s everything to me.

“Oh, my god,” I all but screech when I lift my head and see my boy has flipped himself over onto his back. Tears instantly form in my eyes. For one, this is the first time he’s done that. For two, Aidan missed this monumental moment.

My hands fly over my mouth. “Look at you, big man,” I say, flopping down on the floor next to him. He looks up to me with his sappy, cute little smile. And in this moment right here, I truly understand that Aidan is right. These precious moments in our son’s life should be shared by the two of us. He has every right to experience all of this as much as I do. I need to shove my sexual frustrations aside. Not let the fact the man has abs chiseled to perfection influence me, or the way his biceps pop out when he flexes just so, or even the way his ass looks in his jeans. Nope, not going to pay any homage to any of that at all. I’m going to let him get to know our child, and once he feels comfortable with taking him on his own, he can move out again.

Right now though, I need to praise my little boy. I pick him up, running pepper kisses all over his chubby, little cheeks, all the while telling him how proud I am of him. I can’t wait to tell Aidan. He’s going to be bummed he missed it. Well, I technically did too, because I had my mind in the dirtiest part of the damn gutter, but I was here and he wasn’t.

“I wonder who that could be.” I push up from the floor when the doorbell rings and cradle Diesel in my arms, my legs cramping the minute I stand up straight. We must have been playing on the floor for two hours. They say time slips away from you when it comes to your children. Hell, I’m realizing this to be true.

“Geez, is there a party here I forgot about?” I open the door to Roan, Alina, Calla, and Cain.

“Welcome home.” Calla pulls me in for a hug and immediately takes the baby from my arms.

“Come on in.” I gesture with my hands, but hell, they’re already making themselves at home by the time I have the door shut.

“She’s beautiful, you guys,” I say, not taking my eyes off of Cain and Calla’s little girl, who I saw earlier.

“We came to welcome you back as well as let these two get to know each other.” Calla points down to the floor where both of the babies are now on their stomachs just staring at each other.

“Holy shit, he’s a mini Aidan,” Cain barks out.

“He sure is.” We all turn around to Aidan walking in the door like he owns the place. Christ almighty. He’s changed his clothes. First thing on my shopping list is to buy one of those little mini spritzer fans you carry around with you, because if he’s going to wear a white wife beater tank that’s stretched damn tight across his solid chest, then this bitch is going to be in heat twenty-four hours of the day. Which reminds me, I will need to be buying more batteries for my bob-ette on top of some kind of gag to stick in my mouth from screaming his fucking name when I come.

For a moment I become dizzy from gawking at his massive chest right along with those abs that are defined and protruding like the incredible hulk he is. My reflexes instantly reach out to steady my weak, wobbly legs.

By the time I reach those pulse-pounding eyes of his, the prick has a smirk on his face. He knows I’m clenching my damn thighs together. I scrunch up my nose, which causes the jerkface to chuckle. Damn it and damn him. Why couldn’t my baby daddy be some loser? Like a deadbeat dad, who has twenty kids scattered around and doesn’t give a shit. UGH.

“Would anyone like a drink?” I smile tightly at Aidan, then spin to greet my now unwelcome guests. They’re unwelcome because I need to rush my ass to the bathroom and change my god darn panties. I may as well never wear a pair of them again.

There went my plan from a few hours ago about keeping my head on straight and only wanting to parent with Aidan. That shit is never going to happen.

“Nah. Alina and I have to get going. Dude, you moving in or what?” Roan approaches Aidan while I think,
To hell with these guys, I’m having a drink
. Walking the long way around the couch to avoid the hot male scent of Aidan, I approach the kitchen, place my hands on the counter, and take a deep, well-needed breath.

“Hey. What’s wrong?” I can’t help but laugh, then lift my head to look into the eyes of my best friend.

“I agreed to let him stay here. That’s what’s wrong.” Alina lets out a deep sigh, sensing what’s coming next. I brace myself for her talk.

“I’m proud of you for letting him stay here. I’m sure it won’t be easy. Just keep telling yourself it’s for your son.” My mind knows it’s for my son, but my body sure as shit doesn’t, and herein lies the problem. I’m lonely, desperate to be touched by a man and not just any man, but by Aidan, and that shit scares the living hell out of me. I push back from the counter and tell her that in a quiet whisper, and what does the little bitch do? She laughs.

“This is not funny, goddamn it,” I snap.

“Oh, but Deidre, it so is. I remember a conversation similar to this not so long ago… now, wait for it. It went something like ‘my pussy being a bank vault and frozen.’” She waves her hand in my face then stifles her laugh with her hand over her mouth.

“Oh no, you don’t. You will not throw my words in my face,” I say a little too loudly.

“I would never do such a thing,” she leans in as if she has to tell me a secret. “Just so you know, my pussy is like one of those twenty-four hour bank ATM machines.”

“You are such a slutty, little bitch. Now, come here.” I pull her in for a hug.

“I’m scared,” I say into her ear.

“I know, honey, but don’t be. Let things fall how they’re supposed to. If the two of you get together, then let it happen; if you don’t, then it doesn’t, but for god’s sake, Deidre, don’t fight it. The two of you made a beautiful little boy. Not to mention Aidan stepped right up to the plate. There aren’t many men who wouldn’t demand a paternity test or go right ahead and claim that the baby is theirs. That right there should show you what kind of man he is. ” Our arms stay locked around each other, confusion written on my face.

“How do you know all this?” The only one who knows anything is my mom. And she’s as tight-lipped as they come.

“Aidan called Roan the minute he left here. Told him everything. He’s happy about the baby. Not to mention he’s here, sweetie.” I stumble away from her and reach for a bottle of wine and a glass out of the wine rack.

“He’ll be a great dad,” I reply unsteadily as I uncork the wine and pour half a glass.

“Don’t be so stubborn.” Alina grabs the glass from my hand, taking her own healthy sip.

“You ready, baby?” Roan peaks into the kitchen.

“Yeah.” She hands me my glass back, kisses my cheek, and squeezes my arm. God, I’ve missed her. She’s always been the level-headed one in our friendship. I sigh once more and take another sip, contemplating her words. Aidan didn’t deny our son. He never questioned me once. It’s just that for once in my life, I need more than sex from a man. I want a family. Someone to take care of and for him to take care of me. I’m not sure if Aidan is the man for it.

We undoubtedly have a physical attraction to each other, which is important in any relationship. But the question is if he ever wants more than that.

By the time I make it back to the living room, everyone is gone. The room is quiet. My boy isn’t on the floor anymore, either.

I place my glass on the table and walk down the hallway, stopping short of the spare bedroom when I hear Aidan talking to Diesel about the first bike he’s going to buy him.

It’s cute, really, listening to him carry on like he’s having a conversion with someone who understands what he’s saying.

I back away soundlessly, deciding it’s time for dinner. It’s been a long time since I’ve actually cooked a meal. It’s what I went to school for. Cooking and baking were something my mom and I have always done together. I’m overly passionate about it. There were days when I was growing up when I would start dinner the minute I returned home from school. Other days, I would create my own recipes. I miss my job at Buttercup Bakery, which is over on 2
nd
Street. Thank god, my uncle owns the place and my job is there for me whenever I’m ready to return. I would give anything to be able to go back to work, but I’m not sure if I’m ready to leave Diesel, yet. I know the time is coming soon, but the idea of anyone else taking care of him all day long doesn’t sit well with me.