That Wedding (24 page)

"What do you mean?"

"Your parents put me in charge of your trust for a reason. They wanted me to help you make good decisions. I take that job very seriously."

"I know you do." I wanna ask him to walk me down the aisle, but I think I need to solve this hostage situation first.

He hands me another piece of paper. "This is the money you currently have control of. It's what's left after paying for college, buying your car, and the downpayment on your condo. You recall, you had more than this, but put it back in the trust. So this is the available cash you have left until you turn twenty-five and gain full control."

"I know, but I thought you had discretion. Like I thought you could take money out of the trust for me if you thought it was necessary. I assumed that's how we'd pay for the wedding, right?"

"That is right. I have discretion. What you have in your control is a lot of money, but I don't think it will cover your dream wedding. And if you did use it for that, you'd probably have nothing else left."

"Right. That's why you're letting me use some of the trust money."

"Well, I might be."

"You might be?"

"Remember, I said I'm holding the wedding money hostage?"

"Uh, yeah."

"I heard that you don't want Pastor John to marry you. That you've refused to go to couple's counseling."

"Well, yeah. He wasn't very nice to me. There's no way I'm letting him marry us."

"The Mackenzies are very adamant about having him marry you. They feel your parents would've wanted it."

I tilt my head and look at him. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"When my parents died, did you think I needed counseling, or did you think I handled it well?"

He thinks about it for a second and straightens the napkin under his drink. "Maybe both. I think we were all shocked at how well you seemed to handle it. We kept wondering when you were going to breakdown. We worried that you were holding it all in. Not allowing yourself to grieve."

"I didn't hold it all in. The night of the funeral after everyone left, I went back to my house and lost it. Cried my eyes out. Phillip was there. He knows."

"What about after that?"

"What do you mean?"

"Danny says you never let yourself cry. That you hold it all in. That's not normal, honey. You're supposed to cry."

I shake my head at him. "Not me. I just suck it up. Although, I did cry on stage when we got engaged, so you can't say I never cry."

"Okay, is it true that you've never visited their grave? Not once?"

His comment makes me feel really guilty, especially since he's looking at me in a way that makes me know he thinks I should have. Like I've been a bad daughter for not going. "Yeah," I say, "but I don't go there because I don't believe they're there. I believe they're in heaven."

Plus.

I can't go back there.

Thinking of their bodies buried in the dirt.

Um, no. Not going there.

EVER.

"What about hospitals? Is it also true that you didn't visit your best friend, Lori, when she had her appendix out?"

I start to fidget. I'm feeling a bit uncomfortable about all this. I try to explain myself. "Um, it's true, but I had a test, and Lori was home the next day. I visited her there."

He nods his head at me. I can tell he sees right through me.

And I did kinda lie to everyone about the test.

I hate hospitals.

Nothing good happens there, at least for me, and I didn't wanna like jinx her.

He smiles at me. "I'll always worry about you, you know?"

"I know, and I really appreciate it. Appreciate everything you've always done for me."

His smile turns to a grimace. "You may not feel that way after I tell you this. I agree that you should choose who marries you, but I'm going to insist you go to couple's counseling. All of us go through it. It's really a good thing. I know you and Phillip get along well, but being a couple is different from being friends. There are a lot of issues to deal with as a married couple. Marriage counseling helps prepare you for that. You're moving very fast, and I'm sure there are things you and Phillip have never discussed before, like money, budgets, life goals, how many kids you want, how to handle conflicts, things like that. So if you chose to go through couple's counseling with Pastor John, you can send me all the bills for the wedding. If you choose not to, then you'll have to pay for it on your own. I'm sorry if he upset you, honey, but I really believe your parents would agree with me on this."

"Did the Macs tell you that Pastor John said my parents abandoned me, and that's why I'm mad?"

"I heard that he asked if you ever felt abandoned. There's a big difference between the two."

I can't talk about this. I won't talk about it. There is no way in hell that I'm ever going to talk to Pastor John again, but I adore Mr. D. I won't be disrespectful. He's done too much for me, and I know he's been brainwashed by the Macs into thinking this is in my best interests.

I give him my best puppy dog eyes. They used to work on my dad when I was little. They probably won't work on him, but they can't hurt. "I'll talk to Phillip about it, but I'm pretty sure I'll be having a very small wedding now. Thanks for the wine."

I was fairly calm when I left the restaurant, but by the time I get home, I'm fuming.

I'm trying to figure out if I can sue him, fight him. I want the big wedding. I think he's right that my parents would want it. It's not his money, it's mine. Who does he think he is? And why was I so stupid? Why at eighteen did I tell them I didn't need that much money? Why did I let them put it back in the trust? What was I thinking?

That's it. I wasn't thinking.

My parents had just died.

I was under stress.

Or duress.

Or whatever it's called when you don't make the right decisions because you're temporarily not thinking straight. I'll hire a lawyer. I'll.......

I storm into the house and throw my purse against the wall.

Phillip's sitting on the couch. He looks at me with concern. "What's wrong?"

I plop on the couch next to him. "We're....we can't.....I don't......he said......" Then I start crying. I tell him how we had our dream wedding planned. How I can't afford it now. How it probably doesn't matter because we have nowhere to have the dream wedding anyway. How I just wanna go to Vegas, have strippers for bridesmaids, and get married by Elvis. How it will just be me and Phillip. How we're not doing couple's counseling. How everyone should just mind their own fucking business. How I'm glad we're moving, so we don't have to go to any more stupid Sunday dinners.

Phillip holds me and lightly pats my back. I'm sure he wonders what the hell, but he never lets on.

"We'll figure something out, Princess. Don't worry," is all he says.

But it's enough.

Phillip always knows exactly what to say.

I lay my head on his shoulder and stop worrying. Phillip has that affect on me. He calms me down. I know we'll figure out something together.

Phillip and I have decided to elope. We're going to skip Vegas and get married on an amazing beach. We spent all last night looking at exotic locales. We haven't figured out where, but since it's just the two of us going, we're going somewhere really posh. Somewhere decadent. We narrowed it down to four places, and I'm going to call them this weekend and find out about their wedding packages. It's not what I dreamed of, but it's how it's gonna have to be.

Like Phillip says,
All that matters is that we get married
.

And I keep telling myself that he's right.

Even though it doesn't feel that way.

I'm sitting at Phillip's desk at work, sketching out some very rough ideas for the front of the new building. They've been floating around in my mind for a few days, and I want to get them on paper.

My cell rings. I don't recognize the number, but notice it's the KC area code. "Jadyn Reynolds," I say very professionally, assuming it's one of the realtors we've been working with.

"Miss Reynolds, this is Maggie from the International Hotel in Kansas City. I got your message the other day, and I wanted to let you know that we had a cancellation for our rooftop ballroom and wondered if you were still interested."

OH MY GOSH!!! OMIGOSH!!! Ohmygosh!!! I can barely breathe!!! The International Hotel is the dream spot!!! Rooftop ballroom overlooking the Lights!!! Can this really be happening??? Am I awake?

"Are you serious?" I ask.

But, shit. What happened? Why did it come available? Did some other couple call off their wedding?

Would it be bad karma to take their place?

Do I really care about karma?

"May I ask why the event got cancelled?"

"It was scheduled for an annual company holiday party, but you know with the way the economy is a lot of companies are cutting back. They've decided to cut out their party this year."

"Wow, okay." AHHHHH!! "What date is available?"

"Saturday, January the thirteenth."

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's like a bolt of lightening just flashed straight down from heaven into Phillip's office.

January the thirteenth!! My parents' anniversary was the twelfth.

"The thirteenth would be perfect," I hear myself say. I'm beyond thinking. I'm just doing. "Wait. Are the Plaza Lights still up then?"

"Yes, it's their last weekend," she says cheerfully.

"I'll take it."

I can't believe my luck, my being blessed, I'm not sure, but wow. I'm sooooo excited.

It gets even better when she says, "I don't know if you're interested, but the wedding and event planner who normally does this function is free now as well. She's very talented and has other vendors you might be interested in hiring. Would you like her number?"

OMG!!! YES!!! A wedding planner AND the dream location!??!! Is this really happening?

Thank you, God.

Thank you, Mom and Dad.

Thank you, whoever listened to my prayers and made this happen.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

"I'd love that," I say.

I do want a wedding planner. I want to go over my ideas with her, my colors, the scrapbook of stuff that I've been collecting in my mind, and have her fret the tiny details. I want us to enjoy our wedding weekend. I think a wedding planner is exactly what we need.

Then she says, "The company also had a block of rooms held. Would you be interested in those?"

Uh, yeah!!!

"Yes, it will be a destination wedding, so we'll definitely need the rooms."

Before I know it, I'm giving her my credit card number to put down a deposit, and she's faxing me over a contract.

This isn't just any venue that became available. This is the dream one. This is the gorgeous hotel with the view of the Plaza Lights. It has a rooftop ballroom, great food, and sparkly chandeliers.

All of a sudden, I can see my wedding again.

I know what I want. I know what colors I want, and I can picture it.