Read Ten Thousand Truths Online
Authors: Susan White
Amelia dropped the last corn seed. She stood up and looked over at the others.
Another garden being planted,
she thought,
the beginning of another growing season
. She felt so content. She had everything she wanted right here. It had been a good life and she could feel a certain pride for having kept this farm running and taken care of all of those kids over the years. Sometimes she felt like the progress the twins had made was too good to be true. They were a lot more talkative and open now, and she could see them coming out of their shells a little more every day. Seeing the smile that constantly covered Raymond's face as he worked around outside always made her heart swell. Rachel was doing all right, too, she thought. There had been no more issues at school and even though Rachel remained quiet and guarded, she seemed settled and less anxious. And every day Amelia grew prouder of the adults Zac and Jodie had become. Jason, too. It had been wonderful to talk to him the other day when he'd called to tell them about the baby being born. He had been over the moon with excitement about his new daughter, proudly telling her that they had named her Amelia. He had come a long way from the traumatized teenager who had come to her ten years ago.
Over the last few days she had thought a lot about how she felt the last time she had gone out, about the fear and self-consciousness that had almost paralyzed her at the seed store. She had told herself a few times since then that she had been right to stay here all those years and not expose herself to the judging looks of others. But standing here today, it occurred to her that the joy and privilege of being here was not hinged on the exile she had imposed on herself. In fact, her love of her home had become even clearer to her when she had finally let herself leave. She knew now that she had the choice. She could come and go and this place and this feeling would still be here for her when she got home. And no matter how it might seem, she knew that the feeling had nothing to do with how other people saw her.
“My grandmother wants me to go visit her this summer,” Rachel said as she cut carrot coins into a pot of boiling water. Amelia stood next to her, peeling the potatoes. Rachel had been waiting for days to find the right opportunity to make that statement, and now that she'd put it out there she was dying to hear Amelia's response.
“Do you want to go?” Amelia asked, not taking her eyes off the potato she was peeling.
“Well, she really wants me to,” Rachel answered nervously. “But she lives in British Columbia. It is not like it's just down the road. She really wants to meet me. My two aunts want to meet me, too. And my father wants to meet me. Well, he has already met me, of course, but he doesn't really know me. He would like to get to know me. I have cousins, too. And my grandmother says they want to meet me. I don't have a grandfather. He died before I was born. He has a sister in Revelstoke, though, and she also wants to meet me.”
“Wow, that is a lot of people that want to meet you,” Amelia said. “Do you want to go?” she asked again.
Rachel started to cry. She certainly hadn't planned on that. She had just planned on indifferently dropping the fact that her grandmother and other family members really wanted her to go. She wasn't ready to give any indication that
she
actually wanted to go. She wasn't even positive that she did. But when Amelia asked her if she wanted to go, the emotion had flooded through her and completely caught her off-guard.
Amelia put the paring knife on the side of the sink and turned toward Rachel. For the first time since her arrival nine months ago, Rachel reached out to Amelia and allowed herself to seek comfort in the woman's arms.
Supper was over, the dishes were done, and the table was set up for a game of dominoes. Everyone had just sat down to start playing when Amelia made the announcement to the others.
“We need to come up with a plan to get Rachel to British Columbia this summer. I'm going to go with her, and I am going to Calgary to see Jason and Megan on the way. I won't fly, but taking a train or a bus might be a possibility. Or I suppose I could drive, if I had a car.”
There was a moment of stunned silence as the others at the table processed what Amelia had just said.
“Zac has the Jimmy he bought from Brad Campbell ready for the road again,” Raymond finally offered as he looked up from his dominoes. “Maybe you could drive that.”
“And maybe Jodie could stay with us while you're gone,” Chelsea piped in.
“You could go have tea at the Empress Hotel, Amelia!” Chrystal chimed.
“Wow, those are great ideas!” said Amelia. “And you guys came up with them so quicklyâalmost as if you'd been thinking about them already! It seems like maybe there has been a bit of a secret mission going on here. Do you know where the saying âMum's the word' comes from, you secret keepers? It comes from the sound you make when you speak with your mouth shut tight. Mmmm. If you want to keep a secret, mummmm is the word to say. Apparently mum's been the word around here for a while.”
Chapter 7
Going Down the Road
The month of June was busy with the preparations and work that needed to be done to get ready for Amelia and Rachel's trip. It hadn't taken long after Amelia's May long weekend announcement to get the ball rolling. Zac had driven the Jimmy into the yard the next day and assured Amelia that it was in good working order. Jodie had bought her seat covers for the two front seats. For two weeks Amelia had practised using the four-speed shift by driving in and out the road and up and down Zac's steep driveway. Then she and Zac had gone to Hampton and registered the truck in her name. The next day she'd driven the kids to school and she'd been driving it every day since.
Amelia was keen about the trip and realized it wouldn't be a short one if they were to drive all the way across the country. It had been difficult to convince her that she could leave the kids and the farm for a whole month, even though everything was running smoothly on that front. The garden was all planted and everything was up and growing. The new meat king chickens and turkeys had been picked up and the cow had birthed her calf.
Raymond and the twins had repeatedly told Amelia that they would be fine if she went. Jodie had somehow managed to get the whole month of July off work and was planning to stay at the farm for the entire time. Zac had assured Amelia that he would keep everything under control and that she deserved a vacation.
Amelia had called Sarah Thompson and asked her if there was any problem with her taking Rachel out of the province. She told Amelia that all it required was written permission from her as Rachel's social worker. She also said that she would be able to give them the July support cheque in advance so that it could be used to help with the trip's expenses.
Rachel was a bit overwhelmed with the way things were coming together so quickly, and as the time to leave got closer she found herself wondering why she had ever thought going to meet her family was a good idea. Even as she listened to the others reassuring Amelia that going was a great idea, she came up with a ton of reasons why it was the stupidest idea she'd ever had. But she kept those thoughts to herself. It wasn't until the day before they were planning to leave that it caught up to her and she finally told Jodie what she was really feeling.
“I wish the letter had never come from my grandmother,” Rachel said as she and Jodie sat together by the lake late one Saturday afternoon at the end of June.
“Why do you say that?” Jodie asked.
“If I had never gotten her letter I still wouldn't know anything about her or my father and I never would have thought of leaving here. How can I do my part if I'm driving across Canada? And what about my hour at the lake? And I'm going to miss a whole month of swimming. What about the haying? What about the cooking and other chores? How are you guys going to handle things without having Amelia here? What if one of the twins falls out of the hayloft and breaks her arm? And what if I end up wanting to stay in BC.? What if I want to stay and nobody there wants me to?”
“You have thought of lots of things to worry about, haven't you?” Jodie said. “But think for a minute about what you have done by putting together this plan. Amelia is taking a trip across Canada when this time three months ago she hadn't left home for thirty years.”
“But I'm taking her away from you guys.”
“Raymond and the twins are showing more independence and courage than we ever would have thought possible. You have given Zac and me an opportunity to do something for Amelia for a change. We can hold down the fort and give her a chance to get away for a few weeks.”
“But what about Amelia?” Rachel asked. “Do you think she is just doing this for me, or do you think she really wants to go?”
“I think she wants to go,” Jodie answered. “She's going to get to visit Jason and his family. She's going to get to live her dream of having tea at the Empress Hotel. Of course she's going for you, but she must want to do this for herself, too, or she wouldn't be doing it.”
“What about my grandmother and my father?” Rachel said, fidgeting with a string hanging off of her T-shirt. “Am I just fooling myself to think I am going to find this perfect family waiting for me? I'm sure my dad isn't instantly going to become Father of the Year as soon as he sees me.”
Jodie leaned over and squeezed Rachel's shoulders. “You're giving your father something more to motivate his recovery. You're allowing your grandmother and aunts a chance to meet a part of their family that has been missing. You don't have to do anything but let yourself enjoy the trip. No one can tell you how it will work out, but you can be proud of doing your part. Amelia will be driving back no matter how your visit goes. Just go and let whatever happens, happen.”
Rachel laid her head on Jodie's shoulder and together they watched the crimson ball of the sun setting over the lake.
The Jimmy was packed and everyone was sitting in the kitchen having a special good-bye breakfast. Jodie had made waffles and Zac had cooked ham drenched in maple syrup. Amelia was compiling long lists for them and bobbing up and down out of her chair like a yo-yo. “The twins have a dentist appointment on July 11. Don't forget to check for potato bugs as the plants get bigger. Look under the leaves for the eggs; you have to get those, not just the hard-shelled adults.”
“Amelia,” Jodie broke in authoritatively. “We are no stranger to the Colorado potato beetle and besides, I think you put that on at least two of our lists.” Jodie dropped a waffle on her plate and gave her a quick hug. “Sit still and eat.”
Rachel was putting the last few items in the cooler. “It looks like we have enough food here for the whole trip!” she laughed.
“Buy enough bread at the market on Saturdays to do the week,” Amelia continued. “Don't try to make the bread, Jodie. You'll have enough to do trying to feed this bunch without trying to make bread.”
“Maybe I'll make it,” Zac said. “I expect I'll be eating most of my meals here.” He rubbed the top of Raymond's head. “Someone has to help this guy run this funny farm.”
“I'm going to call every night, no matter where we are,” Amelia rambled on. “If I don't get a hold of you I'll leave a message. You can always call my cell phone if you need to for any reason. Dr. Hollway's number is by the phone.”
“Don't worry so much, Amelia,” Zac said as he led her toward the open door. “We'll be fine. We will look forward to hearing about your travels every night. Now get in the Jimmy and get going!”
Amelia pulled the Jimmy up to the gas pumps at the Irving station in Welsford. Rachel got out and started filling up the tank. The station attendant began washing the windshield.
“Where are you ladies headed on this beautiful day?” he asked.
“We're driving across Canada,” Rachel replied.
“Get out of town!” he said.
“That's what we're doing,” laughed Amelia as she went in to pay for the gas.
“So it's just you and your grandmother driving all the way across the country?” the attendant asked Rachel as they waited for Amelia to return.
“Yep!” Rachel didn't bother to correct the man. She just reached into the backseat, grabbed an apple from the cooler, and refastened her seatbelt.
Amelia did most of the talking during the first three hours of the drive. She spouted all the New Brunswick trivia she could muster and kept the conversation going with only a few words from Rachel. They stopped briefly to look at the Hartland covered bridge and Amelia told Rachel that the bridge had been opened on July 4, 1901, and it was 1,282 feet long. But the last hour of the drive was tortuous. The upbeat feeling Rachel had felt when they left this morning was not what she felt now. All she wanted was to be home at the lake.
Finally Amelia turned the car off the highway and headed into the driveway of the hotel they'd booked for the night, called the Happy Club Motel.
Maybe a place with “happy club” in its name will perk me up,
Rachel thought to herself as Amelia got out of the car to check them in.
The woman behind the counter was very pleasant, but Amelia thought she seemed to linger too long staring at the bumps on her face. The woman asked her a bunch of simple registration questions, things like her name, how many guests were in her party, her street address and postal code. But the answers were stuck in Amelia's throat as if she were being asked to bare her soul. Her license plate number? She had no idea. Credit card? She didn't have a credit card. She had never needed one. Maybe she should have gotten one before taking this trip. She was going to pay with cash. She finally got the key for room 10 from the woman and hurried out to get Rachel and the suitcases.
“The first motel was built in 1925 in San Luis Obispo, California,” Amelia said as she and Rachel dropped their bags on the floor of the hotel room. “It was called the Mo-tel Inn. Mo-tel was an abbreviation of motor and hotel.”
“Let's take a walk and find somewhere to eat supper,” she continued. “I'm stiff from driving all day. I haven't sat still that long for years. I'll get used to it after a few days, I suppose. We'll drive longer tomorrow, and we'll stop on the other side of Montreal tomorrow night.”
The phone rang six times before Jodie answered it.
“I was just taking the clothes off the line when I heard the phone ringing,” she told Rachel. “Peter Totten dropped off three piglets today and Zac and Raymond are working on a yard for them so the pigs can come in and out of the shed. Crystal and Chelsea have hardly left the pig shed. They've named the piglets Lavendar, Lilac, and Larry, but Zac and Raymond are calling them Breakfast, Lunch, and Supper.”
The twins got on the phone and talked to Amelia and then Rachel spoke to Jodie again before they hung up the phone. Rachel's feeling of homesickness was even stronger than it had been earlier and she wished she was back home in her own room, not in a room at the Happy Club Motel. She picked up the TV remote and started scrolling through the channel guide, looking for something to take her mind off where she was and where she was heading.
It was a beautiful sunny day and the air was already hot when they exited the Tim Horton's drive-thru at seven o'clock. Amelia had wanted to get an early start on a long day of driving. The thought of driving through Montreal was worrying her a lotâall that traffic and the numerous road changes were a lot to handle, especially for someone who hadn't driven through a city in over thirty years. She kept telling herself she'd be fineâshe was just going to take her time and follow the map that Jodie had printed off for her. Montreal would probably be the biggest challenge of the whole drive and at least she would get that over with at the start of the trip.
Rachel tore a piece off her bagel and took a bite. She had dreamed about her father last night. In the dream he was walking ahead of her in a field and she couldn't see his face. She was trying to catch up with him, but he just kept walking faster. She tried calling his name, but the sound of her voice was lost in the wind and she couldn't get his attention. She had woken up around four o'clock in the morning and laid awake for a long while afterwards, trying to get the dream off her mind.
“The province of Quebec is three times the size of France.” Amelia's voice broke into Rachel's reverie and brought her back to the present.
“My parents were never married,” Rachel said. “Garnham was my mom's last name, and her mom disowned her when she had me. How can a mother disown her own kid? She hated my father. The first time I ever saw my mom's mother was at the funeral. I wanted to ask her that day if she wanted to own my mother again now that she was dead. I was hoping she didn't want to own me, but I didn't have to worry about that.”
Rachel stared out the window and wiped the tears that were slowly dripping down her cheeks. She had forgotten all about that and wondered why it had come to mind now.
“My parents weren't married either,” Amelia said. “I don't even know who my father was. My grandmother raised me. The last time I saw my mother I was about ten years old. She used to visit once or twice a year, but when I was ten she just stopped coming.”
“I wonder how big the pigs will be when we get home,” Rachel said, deliberately trying to change the subject. “The raspberries will be ready when we get back, won't they?”
“Yes, probably,” Amelia answered. “We usually have raspberries by the end of July. We should make sure we get a good meat and vegetable meal at suppertime tonight. And let's try to find a hotel with a pool so you can go for a swim.”
They drove on chatting about harmless topicsâchickens, sunflowers, the gardenâuntil they stopped for lunch. They said nothing more about mothers or grandmothers.
The traffic through Montreal took all of Amelia's attention. She gripped the wheel tightly as she navigated through the busy highways. As soon as they got out of the most congested area, Amelia pulled over and laid her head down on the steering wheel.
“In 1910, the magician Harry Houdini was the first solo pilot to fly a plane in Australia,” she said after a few minutes. “He taught himself to drive an automobile just so he could drive out to the airfield and then he never drove again.”
After checking into the motel Rachel and Amelia ate supper at the restaurant next door and then called home. Everyone took turns talking to them. Amelia described the horror of driving through Montreal to Zac and he asked Rachel afterwards how she'd managed as the passenger. Jodie told them that she'd cooked the first of the peas for supper and raved about how good the hot milk cake that Chelsea made for dessert had been. Raymond told them that he and Zac had picked up a field of hay at the Fullertons' this afternoon and they still had to unload the wagon. Then he played his newly learned rendition of “Stairway to Heaven” on the guitar as Amelia held the phone out so that Rachel could hear it, too. Crystal told Rachel she'd put a doll's bonnet on one of the pigs and took its picture.