Authors: Barbara S. Stewart
“I need to know how you did that,” I whispered, sneaking kisses behind her ear. The three of them headed to their seats.
***
Maisie
The opening band had finished their set and the crew was getting the stage set for Tate. I was anxious to see what song he’d chosen to open with tonight. I saw one of the crew place two stools center stage, and my mind wandered to who would sit on the second stool.
Finally, the lights dimmed and the crowd got quiet. When the lights came up again, Tate and his steel guitar player, Jake Chrieten, were waiting on the stools. Tate had his guitar resting on his lap, looking out at the arena with a big smile. Finally, he started softly strumming.
“Hey Dallas! Thanks for having us here tonight!” The place roared like thunder in reply. “This is one of the first love songs I ever wanted to learn to play. I love the lyrics, but something about the melody grabs me every time I hear it. Jake’s gonna harmonize with me. You know the drill!”
He didn’t say that I was in the audience.
No chances
, I heard him repeat the words in my mind. At last, Tate began singing.
Going out of my mind these days,
like I'm walkin 'round in a haze,
I can't think straight, I can't concentrate,
and I need to shave…
Diamond Rio
, I thought, and then they sang the chorus together.
What a beautiful mess, what a beautiful mess I'm in
Spending all my time with you
There's nothing else I'd rather do.
What a sweet addiction that I'm caught up in
Cause I can't get enough
Can't stop the hunger for your love.
What a beautiful mess, what a beautiful mess I'm in…
The song was beautiful and I loved that this was the one he chose.
Sweet Addiction.
I knew that feeling. He’d changed my life in so many ways. I couldn’t get enough of him.
Beautiful
mess
, I heard him sing, and I prayed that it would never be less than beautiful. The more days that I shared with Tate Morrow, the more I prayed for more. Many more.
Once I got past being pissed that Cat and Simone wouldn’t be leaving me alone, I gave into the idea and decided to have fun. I went through it in my mind – they were there for my safety, and with that knowledge I had some mixed emotions.
The crowd was wild throughout the show, and Tate was still pumped up when we returned to the hotel.
“Show me how you do that shirt thing,” he growled.
“I don’t have another shirt on,” I laughed.
“Bet you can do it with a bra,” he egged me on.
“Bet I can, too,” I replied suggestively, and I had my bra in my hand in a matter of seconds.
***
The next stops on the tour were in Corpus Christi followed by Austin, and we stayed on the coach. When he stepped off the stage in Austin, I felt fatigued. The days seemed backward to me. I couldn’t understand how he could continue to go and go like this. It must have been pure adrenaline.
Santa Fe was next and we checked into a hotel. I decided to stay behind when he left for the show. I needed to call Dion to go over some sketches I’d left with him, so after about a million “no chance” rules, Tate left.
I talked to Dion for a while and then stretched out on the bed and watched old
Law and Order
episodes. Through our travel and the late hours, I’d come to the realization that one variety of
Law and Order
could be found on TV somewhere, anytime, day or night.
I dozed, and when I woke, I looked at the clock. Tate would be back soon. I decided to peek and see what song they’d posted on the fan page before he returned. I heard him singing the Conway Twitty song
Lay You Down.
But I won't talk of starry skies
or moonlight on the ground
I'll come right out and tell you
I'd just love to lay you down
I smiled, and then I laughed. Now everyone would assume what Tate had in mind. I wanted it to embarrass me because I thought that it should. It only excited me, and I liked it.
***
Tate
When I stepped off the stage, I dialed Maisie’s number. “Ten minutes. Be naked.”
Half an hour later, when I entered the room, I found her lying on the bed, as close to naked as she could be and still be wearing something besides a sinful smile.
“Welcome back,” she purred.
“Jesus, Maisie,” I called out. Slamming the door behind me, I pulled the pearl snaps on my shirt from the bottom, opening it rapidly. I kicked my boots off and dove on the bed, smothering her with kisses. She reached for the button on my jeans. Just her touch had me pushing against the zipper. I quickly slid it down and got off the bed to remove them then jumped back on the bed beside her.
“This is interesting,” I said, running my finger along the red lacy outfit. The top covered almost nothing. It seemed as though it was a second skin that left nothing to my imagination.
“Dion made it for me when I told him about us. You don’t need to worry about him daydreaming about my body. He’s far more interested in yours.” The sound that came from her was a low growl and it made me want her even more.
“I feel like The Big Bad Wolf and you’re my Little Red Riding Hood. ‘What a tender young creature! What a nice plump mouthful’…
”
“Oh my goodness,” Maisie roared. “I can’t believe you know that!”
“What about that line isn’t the sexiest thing you’ve ever heard? Every man should memorize that line.” I said, running my hands slowly up her body. “This is so much better than naked. You’re a wet dream come true. I’ve got to get you out of this.”
“I’m waiting…”
I reached for the hem of the sheath and slowly inched it up her body, kissing where it exposed her to me. I watched her squirm in anticipation and thought I would lose my mind.
“Slow down,” I told her. “I want this to be an experience. It’s not just about getting it done – this is something to savor. Relax, Maisie. Don’t think about anything but this. Think about us.”
I reached over to turn off the light beside the bed. The light on the other side of the room cast a dim glow and I looked at her lying there. “So beautiful,” I said as my hands moved slowly around her body with feathery touches. Maisie did the same.
The touch of her hands, her fingers lightly brushing my skin, was heaven, but the warmth of her cheek next to mine - the sigh, the warm breath in my ear - was more passionate than anything I could ever imagine. This was love, and it brought lovemaking to a new light.
***
Afterward, we lay wrapped in each other’s arms. “I’m not saying this to bring up my past. I just want you to know. I have never felt the spontaneity or the desire that I feel with you. I love what we share,” she murmured.
“Maisie, I can promise you that I have never, ever felt what I feel with you. I have never experienced anything like what you and I share.”
“Good, because I don’t want you to have anything to compare us to. I don’t,” she whispered, and I saw the tears slide down her cheeks. “I want what we have to be unique.
You
are my unique, Tate.”
“Nothing compares to this. Whatever I had before wasn’t love. I will never lie and tell you that I lived a celibate life. But I told you, I have
never
been in love.”
“Before you go to sleep, tell me about the show tonight,” she whispered in a sleepy voice.
“Did you see the video?”
“I did. That’s why I was ready for you to ‘lay me down’.”
“Then that’s all I need to tell you,” I said. “I love thinking of which country classic I will open with to sing to you each night.”
“It’s a ritual that I love. The crowd seems to also. I can’t believe how many videos they share from each concert. Sometimes it feels like they want to show me the best they can get. I’m anxious each evening.”
***
The next morning, as we boarded the bus and headed to Amarillo, my phone rang and I heard Carlene’s voice when I answered.
“How’s my girl?” she asked.
“She’s great, would you like to talk to her?”
“In a minute. I called because I want to tell you about something I heard through the Nashville grapevine.” She said it with a serious voice that made me curious.
“Give it up,” I nudged.
“Ami went in the studio yesterday. Word is she’s cutting a single. Of course, an album will follow. The song she’s recording has an interesting title.
He Shouldn’t Be Yours
is what she’s calling it
“Hmm. Interesting. Audra didn’t say anything about it. I’m gonna think on this, and I’ll call you tomorrow. Here’s Maisie.”
They talked a few minutes and when Maisie handed my phone back to me, she turned and asked, “What was that about?”
“Word around Nashville is that Ami’s in the recording studio,” I replied.
“That’s not such big news.” She paused. “Or is it?”
“It’s the song she’s recording that has the gossip mill going.
He Shouldn’t Be Yours”
. I gave her a minute to let it sink in.
“Huh,” she drew in a breath. “No.”
“I don’t know,” I replied with a shrug of my shoulders.
“But you don’t think…”
“I’m not sure what to think at this point. It’s gossip, right?”
“Tate,” she said, looking at me wide-eyed.
“I’ll call Daniel tomorrow, just to let him know. No chances.”
***
Once again, we’d made arrangements for a female security staff to sit with Maisie and they’d left for their seats. I called Audra before going on stage. “Hey,” I said. “The security gals at each venue are great. Thank you, I appreciate it.”
“It’s what you asked for. That’s what I do, right?” she said with a snip. She still wasn’t thrilled that I’d chosen to bring Maisie along with me.
“How are things in Nashville? I’ve been so busy I haven’t had a chance to ask. I hear Ami’s in the studio. Is she working on a new album?” I asked, fishing for something from Audra to let me know what she knew.
“Just a song for now. She said something popped in her head and she had to go at least record a rough version. I’m not even really sure what she’s working on. I need to check in with her and see what it is so I can start working with whatever she needs. How’re things with Maisie?”
“Good. Almost stage time. Just wanted to check in. Gotta go.”
“Break a leg.” Either she didn’t know anything, or she wasn’t giving anything away.
I played for another sold out crowd that evening.
Chapter Nine
Tate
The next morning we packed and hurried to the airport. The crew left after the show the night before to get a jump on the trip. We were headed for Little Rock, Arkansas.
It was another sold out show. That night, I opened with
She’s All That
- a song that I’d written for Maisie.
“This is a new one. I’m still workin’ on it. Let me know what you think!”
When the lights were just right, I could see her in the front row. The love I felt for her overwhelmed me as I sang the words.
She’s a sweet spot in my busy life
She’s joy and love I’ve never known
On a dark night
She’s the only light
She’s a piece heaven sent to me
She’s an angel, and an enchantress
She’s my fantasy
She’s all that I need
She’s my lover, she’s my partner
She’s the one I’ll always want beside me.
She’s quite a charmer
And my safe harbor
She’ll still be beside me when we grow old…
The crowd went wild letting me know they liked it.
“That was beautiful, Tate,” Maisie told me when the show was over.
“It’s my heart speaking to you. Let’s go home,” I said. Grabbing her hand, I led her to the exit. We took the red-eye back to Nashville.
Nashville was home now and home is where I wanted to be. I knew Maisie was too. She’d been on the phone with Dion for hours on end making sure everything was continuing as though she was there. Dion was a great comrade, a true friend, and I knew that Maisie loved and trusted him completely. My townhouse was closer to the airport, so we slept there.
***
It was after noon when we headed to my office the next day. Deidre had Sadie there waiting for us. She jumped up and came to me, softly bark-bitching her excitement to see me. After she licked and loved on me, she sidled up to Maisie and rubbed all over her legs, her tail flipping like a lone windshield wiper, back and forth, back and forth, on high-speed. Maisie and I went to my office and I grabbed the items I needed to work on. As we got ready to leave, Jake came in.
“Well, good morning!” Maisie said, and I saw Jake’s face redden to the color of Deidre’s lipstick.
“Hey. I, uh, stopped by to grab t-shirts for my nieces.”
“Yeah, t-shirts,” I smirked. Suddenly, Deidre’s face was the same shade. As we drove away, I turned to Maisie and she grinned.
“No,” she said. “He wasn’t just there to get t-shirts.”
She wanted to make a stop by her shop. Entering the place, Sadie followed her in and went straight to her bed. Dion welcomed Maisie with hugs and kisses.
“Stop,” she laughed. “It’s only been a little over a week!”
April was busy at the sewing machine. Maisie went to her and hugged her as though they were old friends. “Thank you for being here and helping us out. I’d like to talk to you more later about staying on.”
That statement brought a big smile to my face. I knew she would never give it up. It meant too much to her, but her letting a little of it go was huge. It meant that she’d given a bigger piece of herself to me.
I had a show in Nashville on Tuesday night. Maisie didn’t go. She had some things to take care of at the shop and then Dion was taking her home. I know she felt like I was holding her captive, but she didn’t complain. “I know, no chances,” she would say before I did.
At the show, I walked out on stage and sat on the stool. The guitar rested on my lap, and my elbow on the guitar.
“I’m sure glad to be home! This is home now, ya know, and as good as being on the road is, I’m ready to be home for a little while.”
***
Maisie
Tate still wasn’t ready for me to come and go alone, so Dion took me home, making sure I was safe. I was ready for all of this to all be over. I kept waiting for Tate to say Daniel called with an explanation for all this craziness, but so far, nothing – nothing at all. He told us that he’s pretty sure it’s an insider – that it’s someone who knows where to go to find information, and what buttons to push.
It was frustrating. Sometimes I just wanted to blow up and say, “Duh! I think we all know that!” I was ready to live my life with Tate, but it felt like we had a black cloud looming above us. We’d see a ray of light, a glimmer of hope, and then the storm returned. We never quite got out from beneath it – it felt like we were constantly waiting for the clap of thunder, or the bolt of lightning that brought the next squall.
After Dion left, I started sketching ideas for a new vest for Carlene for an upcoming benefit for her charity, Little Ones. I loved that she used the nickname she’d given me, but what I loved more is what she did for them. Little Ones was an organization that supported underprivileged children. Because of her experience with me, she established the charity to get kids the tools to teach them to succeed.
Little Ones events provided the kids books – both fun and educational. Libraries all over the U.S. donated used books. The kids loved them. Carlene loved to read, so the charity tried to instill that love to the kids. And I knew from personal experience, that you couldn’t read a book without it teaching you something. Sometimes lessons are subtle - sometimes they change your life. These kinds of lessons saved me.
Little Ones also provided clothing and items for every day needs. They held sock and underwear drives twice a year. Carlene’s friends donated toiletries, and her dentist had a network of other dentists who provided toothbrushes and toothpaste to make hygiene goodie bags for the kids.
A big part of Little Ones was finding mentors to work with the kids to learn crafts - this was a huge thing for me. Granny took great pleasure in teaching me to sew to keep them out of trouble. It was personal to me to instill that in the kids Little Ones supported. I’d taught a couple of sewing classes and loved it.
I loved the craft fair. The kids came ready to sell their goods, just as I’d sold my aprons. They sold paintings, drawings, and hand-made purses, totes, and pillows. The amount of talent at the Craft Fair was awesome.
I’d been working on Carlene’s vest for a while when my phone indicated a text message. It was Tate.
On my way HOME!
Home,
I thought as I put the sketchpad aside. I pulled up the Fan Page and peeked. This clip began in the middle of the song, but I recognized it -
Back Home Again
by John Denver.
And oh, the time that I can lay this tired old body down
And feel your fingers feather soft up-on me
The kisses that I live for
The love that lights my way
The happiness that livin' with you brings me.
It's the sweetest thing I know of
Just spending time with you…
It would be after midnight by the time he got home, but I had supper ready. I heard him pull up and went to the kitchen, but I didn’t dare open the door. In my head, I could hear him scold ‘no chances’. So I waited.
“Wow, something smells good!”
“Roasted chicken,” I said.
He lifted the lid and looked in the pan. “You didn’t have to do this, but I’m sure glad you did. I didn’t know I was hungry ‘til I smelled this!”
We talked about the show while we ate. “This is late for you,” he said.
“I’m learning to live my life around your schedule. That’s important to me,” I told him. “I love hearing about the show when I don’t go with you.”
“Can I keep you?”
“You better!” I laughed. “I loved the song choice tonight. I know you have the townhouse, but this is your home.”
“I’ve been thinking about that,” he said.
“Call the movers,” I replied.
***
Tate
Just the idea that Maisie was ready to make that leap had me reeling. I wanted to ask about a wedding date, but I decided that I’d let the idea of me moving in sink in first. Baby steps. I knew how she ticked.
We had a week at home. No meetings, no appearances, nothing - just time to relax before Fan Weekend the following week. The festivities were always the last weekend in June. It was a time for fans to connect with their favorite singers. It ran from Thursday through Sunday. The week after that – right after the Fourth of July - I’d be back on the road. I hadn’t talked to Maisie about how we would handle the next tour yet. Four weeks was a long time away from her work. I knew she wouldn’t be happy about it.
On Monday, we spent the day doing not much of anything. Maisie didn’t go to the shop, but I’m sure that she was working on design ideas for something in her head. I was planning my move, figuring out the logistics. As we ate dinner, my phone rang. I looked at the name on my screen. “Maisie, you know I’d never take time away from us, but this is important. It’s Daniel.”
“We have a couple of leads,” he said immediately after I said hello. “My investigator has a contact at NCN, Nashville Celebrity News. They’re the ones who leaked the story. He says that the call was anonymous. It was a man who didn’t give his name. It was probably the same man who called Maisie, maybe the one she saw watching her. They record the calls, so they’re digging up that tape so Maisie can have a listen. He’s also working on backtracking the call to see if he can find out where it came from.
“He also told me that the word around town is that the song Ami’s recording is about someone in the business. Did you piss her off or reject her in some way? Do you think it’s you?”
“No reason why it would be, but who the hell knows how women think,” I laughed and looked at Maisie, showing her a smile. “Keep me posted.”
Maisie’s smile curled into one of concern.
“Nothing major,” I said. “They tracked the call to NCN - logged as anonymous. They’re still digging. I know you’re ready to put this behind you. I am too.”
“I wish it would just stop.” She pushed her plate aside and let out an exasperated sigh.
“Me too, sweetheart, but you were victimized and I’m not going to allow anyone to think that’s OK with me. It’s not. We will get to the bottom of this.”
“I don’t like feeling like a victim! I don’t like that you think of it that way!” she shouted.
“What would you call it?” I asked in a calm voice.
“I don’t know!” she yelled. She rose from her seat and stomped to the sink with her plate. “I. Don’t. Know!”
I saw something there that I hadn’t experienced before – fire. I liked that she was mad. I liked that she was showing me the emotion to let me know she was. She had every right to feel angry. She was quiet for a while, not saying anything to me as she cleaned up the kitchen. I heard pots banging while she pouted. I tried hard to imagine what she felt, and I couldn’t. I knew it wasn’t me she was mad at – she was just mad. I went into the living room to wait.
“You OK?” I asked after fifteen minutes or so of silence. She came and joined me on the sofa.
“I’m trying to come to terms with my new life, trying to realize what I can control and what I can’t. After Fan Weekend you’ll be getting ready to go again, right?”
“Sadly, this is true.”
“When do you go to Vegas?”
I pulled her on my lap. Kissing behind her ear, I whispered, “Fifth week out. Three shows.” Because she’d be with me, I had Audra ok a few more stops. Maybe we could move things up and get home earlier.
“Back to back, or do you have a break?” she asked.
“I have a show Thursday, Friday and Sunday. Maisie?”
“Let’s do it on Saturday.”
“Do what, Maisie?” I asked, toying with her hair.
“Let’s get married.”
“A wedding in Vegas, with Mama, the girls, Carlene, Dion?” I asked.
“And Deidre and the band. A small wedding for you, no bigger than that, and no Audra,” she said seriously. “I don’t want a big deal. I know it’s your first marriage, but I don’t like the pageantry. And no Elvis wedding,” she added.
I started singing
Burning Love
. “Small wedding it is – or we will never be able to live with the hissy fit Popie and Gabby will throw. I am their favorite brother, you know,” I smirked.
When we reached the bedroom, I grabbed her. Pulling her to me, I kissed her. “I seriously can’t wait, Maisie. I’ve waited for this with you for a lifetime. Before I even knew you, I knew it was you. I love you, and every day I fall more in love with you.”
With her hands twisted in the hem of the t-shirt I wore, she pulled me closer. “I think about all that too, but I focus on one word, Tate. Wife. I can’t wait to be your wife.”