I've known Al for such a long time that I never thought to ask. And in typical Allison fashion, she knew the right time to bring it up. This is the thing with Allisonâshe just knows.
When I arrived at Allison's house, she ran to the door to greet me and told me to come in. She already had pages and pages of notes, and wanted to get started. I can tell you about all of the things she brought up in conversation that hit home, but that isn't what struck me. The first thing I noticed when I walked into Allison's office was that she seemed just like the people who used to hang around my mum. It's hard to describe, but I felt like I was in a room where a little family reunion was taking place, and my mum was holding court.
My mum was a very peaceful and fun lady. There weren't many who escaped her quiet charm. Even as her kid, I noticed that people around her felt like they mattered, and they could really open up to her. I could see that Al had a good shot at connecting with my mum before I walked in.
What happened next was the closest thing to really getting to touch the other side that I've ever experienced.
I have so many memories of my mum and our house that we grew up in. But this was different. Allison tapped into memories that I'd totally forgotten aboutâlike this pastry my mum used to make. And there were things that I didn't even know aboutâmy mum spoke of the few moments after her death with my dad, something he'd never shared with me, or anyone.
I later got the nerve to grab my notes from the session and confirm with my dad, and the things Allison said were more than just a little accurate. One of the things that came up was how he had taken his time to get a headstone for my mother's grave because he was in a lot of pain, and it seemed too final to put in a headstone. One of my aunts pulled him aside and helped him design one. He spent a lot of time on making it look right, and included a rose in the corner. My mum was a devout Catholic, and her favourite saint was St Theresa, who, if you prayed to her for an answer, would show you a rose when your prayers had been heard by God. Roses were also my mum's favourite flower, and through Allison she told me to say âThank you' to my dad for the rose. She said he would know what it meant. He did.
I haven't heard my dad get choked up much, but he did as he confirmed that the messages from my mum were very real. He also told me that he now totally gets what Allison does.
Allison brought up relatives, personal moments and views that my mum has on my wife and children.
None of it gave me chills. It gave me warmth.
None of it was shocking. It was heartwarming.
It was like being at home around a fire during the holidays, having a nice conversation with the people you love the most. I could tell that my mum took a liking to Allison, and I could feel that it was sort of nice for Allison, too, as she dug deep and let herself go into my family. I know she deals with some very intense subject matter, and there is so much hurt out there.
Yes, I get sad sometimes that my mum isn't around to see my kids, or me following my dreams, or to share some success through a trip or a lunch at the beach, but I sort of always thought she was hanging around me and my family. I always felt that I had a pretty powerful angel leading me right, just on the other side. Allison assured me that was the case.
I got confirmation of the fact that a body may give out, but your love for your family remains. Nothing as simple as a body dying can keep your soul away from the ones you love.
MY VALENTINE
I was conducting a private reading for a woman named Judi whose husband, Mike, had passed away four years ago. He was the kind of guy that women pray to have in their life. Anyway, he came through so easily, and the reading was full of a lot of love and trips down memory lane.
At one point Mike said to tell Judi that she would âalways be his Valentine'.
Judi then shared that her husband had died on Valentine's Day while having a heart transplant. I thought, âHow terrible is that?'
Then Judi told me that she and her daughter had attended one of my events over a year ago, and I had read her daughter: âYou told my daughter that she was going to have a daughter, and she couldn't understand that because she had two boys. The doctor had advised her that getting pregnant again could put her life in jeopardy, and her husband should have a vasectomy. After your event, her husband did just that, and soon after they found out that she was pregnant. Two days ago my daughter gave birth, to a baby girl, on Valentine's Day!'
The other side has a way of showing us that we're being taken care of, and when we physically lose someone who's a part of us, our loved ones have a way of sending us a new puzzle piece to add to our heart. That baby girl is a part of Mike, and no doubt she will bring much joy to their family.
â¢
Readings are mostly full of positive, uplifting tidbits of information that collectively make up the story of someone's life, so try not to be afraid of the deceased or their messages. They're actually enjoyable moments that you are now familiar with since you've read this chapter.
Here's wishing you a strong connection with those you love! Talk to them . . . they've been there all along.
I
'm often being asked about children with the gift, even though some people don't see it as a gift, and some children might agree with those people. I'd like to beg to differ, and explain how the gift is very much inf luenced by our personality and environment.
Joe and I have three daughters who have been brought up in an open household, with an understanding of individuality and a belief that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. As we believe everybody has a unique take on how they see one another, and as long as we respect our differences and agree to disagree, everything can be quite harmonious.
I was a child who talked to the souls who remained after physical death. I liked them. They made me feel protected. And, believe me, I was very protected. It was the 1970s and 80s when I was a pint-size medium. Things were different then; people didn't embrace children who talked to spirits. I was no exception. I now have three daughters with the ability to do the same, but they were brought up in a teaching environment with me as their teacher. I saw their raw abilities from the age of two onwards, and as they grew I began to help them strengthen and hone their skills. I tried to make it fun for them, like a game. They're very competitive, and they were incredibly good in the âclassroom'.
As the girls get older, their vocabulary expands and their life experiences increase, and this gives the deceased a greater chance to communicate through them, because they have more overlapping life experiences to draw from. For example, if a child can't spell âCanada', they'd have a hard time conveying the country most important to the deceased, because they don't recognise the word âCanada' when it pops into their head. Likewise a small child could get âred car' but might not get âred Corvette' because they have no reference for Corvette. So, as the gifted grow older, their abilities get stronger because they're more relatable to a wider age range of deceased, as a result of their increasing life experiences.
For the first time, my girls will share with you in their own words their advice for young people who have the special ability to hold hands with those who have passed. Since I give those I read a chance to share their stories with others who can relate, I feel like maybe my girls also need to share their advice with those who need someone to relate to. In my book
Don't Kiss Them Good-Bye
, I talk about some of my own childhood experiences. Now you will hear from the next generationâmy three girlsâin their own words.
I have to say, it was nice sitting down and asking my girls what advice they would give to other kids who were dealing with having the gift in childhood. Our daughters are in a unique position, having Joe and me as parents, as well as having a voice to help others like them.
OUR TEEN MEDIUMS
AURORA, AGE SIXTEEN
Our oldest daughter, Aurora, is a cheerleader, and she does the entertainment news for her high school's TV news station. She's an overachiever, and we're very proud of her. We're just getting used to her driving, and she goes to college next year, so we're trying to enjoy our time with her while she's home. Aurora's super-intelligent, like Joe. She's stunning and sarcastic. I don't know where she got the sarcasm from; Joe and I fight over taking credit for that quality!
Practise your abilities
âPractising with my friend Amanda Campbell helps me to strengthen and improve my abilities, because if you don't practise, your intuition gets dull. You don't need a ouija board to connect with the other sideâjust paper and a pencil to write down the messages coming through. Sometimes it feels like you're guessing, because it is occasionally too easy, or at least it seems so.' Our daughter Fallon is in junior high, and she has a gorgeous voice. For her birthday, she wants an electric guitar to pair with her voice. She loves to bake, just like my grandma Jenee, and she's a talented baker at that! Fallon is an electronics guru and digs movies and TV. She's the kind of girl who doesn't like pink, and she can hang out with boys just as easily as other girls. Fallon's a lot of fun to be around, and she's a huggerâa very loving kid.
Write down all the information you get
âMake sure you're in a quiet place, and writing down the name of the person who died helps me to connect. When a name, picture or song pops in your head, write it down so you don't forget what came through in the reading. That way you have time to make sense of your information.
âWhen I feel overwhelmed at night, if there's activity around me, I like to roll myself up in a comfy blanket. It soothes me.
âI remember being in art class, and we were supposed to make an animal out of paper. I couldn't think of anything, and then a beaver popped into my head. Christmas rolled around and I gave it to my mum's friend Laurie Campbell. She started crying and said that when her dad was dying he was hallucinating and he kept talking about seeing a beaver sitting by a pond, and it calmed him. She said my gift made her really happy, like it was her dad saying he was okay. I was drawn to give it to Laurie, and now I know it's because her dad was telling me to. Cool!' Sophia is our youngest daughter. She's the baby, and she owns that title. She's very active. She's a competitive cheerleader and all-round jock. She loves f lag football, basketballâyou name it! She was born on the Fourth of July, and is an all-American girl. Sophia's a little comedian. She's also very sensitive and fiercely loyal. People just love her.
Hold messages from the other side close
âWhen bringing through family members (spirits), I'm not scared because they're related to me, so maybe only stick to the people closest to you and your parents to bring through. Only share your information with family, not with classmates, because they don't always understand and it can make it kind of weird to be around them later. If your parents don't understand either, then write down what information you hear and see in your diary. It helps you to release the energy.'
TRUSTING YOUR FIRST INSTINCT
Joe and I have âfamily game night' with the girls, and we see it as a valuable tool to teach them how to trust their first instinct. For example, we've played âLoaded Questions' (a card game sold in toy stores). The point of the game is to know, by how the players answered a question, who it was that contributed each answer to your question. We were able to show the girls that whenever they second-guessed themselves, they lost points. When they trusted their gut instinct, they gained points. So we practised until they became comfortable with trusting their first instinct.
If you think about it, we have to be programmed to trust and rely on ourselves. You'd think that would come naturally, but we've become comfortable relying on another person's opinion or insight, rather than our own. I guess it's sort of a âgrass is always greener' scenario.
Trusting your first instinct does actually have to be self-taught because, unfortunately, as we get older, our head gets filled with alternative opinions, and critical thinking becomes our new method. Overanalysis seems to be second nature to all of us âtype A' personalities, as well as those who doubt themselves.
TEACHING KIDS ABOUT THE OTHER SIDE
Lily Dale is a town in New York that is constructed of Spiritualistsâyes, you have to be a Spiritualist to live thereâand every summer they open their doors to the public. In the summer of 2008, I agreed to give a children's seminar there to help very young mediums to hone their skills. Joe and I decided to take our girls so they could really soak in the experience and play with kids like them.
We arrived in Lily Dale on a Tuesday morning, and it was pouring rain; I mean
pouring
. We pulled up in front of the Lyceum Hall where my event was being held. Joe and I were promptly met at our car by a sweet man who introduced himself as âTeddy'. He ushered us through the rain with a wonderful smile on his face, as if the day was sunny and bright. I entered the Lyceum and cast my gaze upon 50 shining young faces whose eyes struck me as nervous. Me, make people nervous? Never! (I'm kidding; I seem to have that effect on people.) I had capped the attendance at 50, so I could have personal time with the kids, where they each got my full attention.
I immediately placed the kids into five groups of ten, and arranged them in circles. They ranged in age from five to eighteen, both boys and girls. I stood before the kids and began to speak to them about my own experiences in childhood. I talked about naming my soft toys after the deceased friends and family members who lingered in my room. It's important that kids with abilities have the feeling of security, such as having a physical object filling the area that is inhabited by spirits. If they don't have to worry about turning around and being caught off-guard by an entity, then their nerves fare better.