Tainted Legacy (YA Paranormal Romance) (24 page)

He couldn’t.

He couldn’t worry about her anymore. He had himself to worry about. He tried to convince himself of this.

That was what he had tried to come to terms with as he struggled to breathe while his body pulled itself back together. There was no hope for either of them. The best hope he had for
himself was to distance himself from Ava as completely as possible. He knew that was not part of the plan that had been set. But he was not of the mind to care what his father wanted at the moment.

His father had found more than the usual amount of delight in the announcement he had made. This left Gabe convinced that he had not hid his feelings well enough. His father did not only delight in Ava’s fate but in his son’s obvious emotional anguish as well.

As Gabe stared at his ceiling he decided he would do what he could to prevent his father from attaining that victory. His father would relish putting his son through emotional torture so he decided he would distance himself from her in an effort to keep that from happening. He would cut her out of his life completely. This would be g {is ct hioing against his father’s wishes but after last night, Gabe realized he could withstand nearly any physical torment his father cared to impart. He could not, however, withstand the emotional torture that would ensue if he took part in Ava’s demise.

His mind was still foggy, confused. But he knew where he needed to start. He grabbed his phone off the nightstand and dialed. He was a little surprised that she didn’t answer considering that she had so desperately wanted to talk to him yesterday. It wasn’t until her voicemail responded that he realized she was in school. He had never bothered to call her during the school day before.

He steeled himself for the sound that let him know it was his time to speak. He tried to ignore the gravelly quality of his voice, an after effect of shredded vocal chords.

If he put the phone call off, they might be more completely healed. But he knew he may lose his nerve. If he was going to make this call, he had to do it now. When the beep signaled his time to speak he left the most pretentious, arrogant message he could muster. He needed time away from her. He needed his space so that he could clear his head.

Breaking things off with Ava would serve two purposes. First, she would not be so easily attainable if they were not together. It would be more difficult, though Gabe realized certainly not impossible, for his father to get to her. Second, he
needed
distance from her. He realized the way he felt about her had developed during all of the time they’d spent together. He hoped that by not seeing her, he could erase those feelings. And quickly because he knew regardless of whether or not he agreed to be part of the plan, Ava’s fate was set. He knew he could not bear it if something happened to her before he was over her.

Therefore, he
needed
to get over her.

He tossed his phone to the side and wondered what he should do next. He had never in his life felt so miserable on every level possible. He was furious with himself for thinking even for a moment that they could be together. After yesterday, he realized he had no place in her life. He never had. Her religion was important to her and he could not step foot into a church without feeling like a hog on a spit.

And yet, he realized he had felt something else as well. The way Ava had looked at him, so happy; her heart nearly bursting with appreciation that he had come to see her. He knew the
discomfort he had felt had been momentarily forgotten, washed away by the feeling he received from making her happy.

He’d never felt that way before. He’d never done anything to
deserve
to feel that way before. He had to wonder if it was as Ava said—bringing happiness to others often created happiness in yourself—or if it was just a fluke. He was feeling lousy. Maybe he needed to do something…nice.

Would that make him feel better?

He mostly doubted it but he had absolutely nothing better to do with his time. Nothing to do but sit around and let his emotions, his fears and misery marinate. He was willing to try almost anything if it would provide him with a distraction.

He was stumped.

There was no way he was going to clean cages at the animal shelter. Or help some crotchety lady cross the street. Or even
think
about anything that had to do with old people. Having never really done anything for anyone before, he wasn’t sure where to begin.

Then he remembered the carnival. That kid, what was his name? Joshua. He decided he was going to buy Joshua a bike. He checked his back pocket for his wallet with its credit cards and grabbed his keys.

If nothing else, it gave him an ironic, happy little jolt to think that he’d be spending his father’s money on something…
good
. It almost made him smile. It definitely made him wonder…If spending his father’s money on one charitable action made him feel good, how would it feel to spend even more?

He felt a warped sense of pleasure at that. Knowing that the creature who had parented him—he who had never caused anyone anything but pain and suffering—was now, without his knowledge, going to use some of his ill-gotten gains, as best as Gabe could find a way, to make other people happy.

Maybe this was just what he needed. To do something completely different from anything that he had ever done before. It might help to clear his mind. He had been so focused on Ava that his perception of reality had become blurry. He needed to step back. He needed to take some time away from her. He needed to clear the slate of his mind and refocus. He couldn’t think about her safety when he was with her because all he could think of when he was with her was how much he wanted to touch her, to be close to her. That couldn’t be his focus right now.

Spending his father’s money in an altruistic fashion at first had seemed like an inconsequential action. As Gabe drove, he realized it was more than that. It proved that he was, as Ava had told him, his own person.

He was capable, at least on some level, of making his own decisions.

He was finding for the first time he was capable of carrying out his own actions.

He knew there would be consequences but there were always consequences.

He also found a twisted pleasure in knowing his father didn’t know all of his secrets. For the first time in his life he knew something his father and his brother did not. It was powerful information. It didn’t make Gabe feel powerful. Not exactly. But it helped him to not feel as
power
< />
less
. It was one secret he was sure that he and he alone knew. It was a secret about Ava. A well kept secret that Ava did not even know. Despite his research, Rafe had missed this vital bit of information as well.

Maybe there was hope.

He did, after all, have information.

If only he knew what to do with it.

Because the secret Gabe kept, it was monumental.

***

Gabe had never called Ava at school before, always giving her enough time to get home before contacting her. Most days she didn’t bother to leave her phone on. Today, however, she was worried about him since she hadn’t heard from him since he’d gotten ill. She had left it on so she could quickly check for messages during her breaks. She had already decided that if she did not hear from him by the end of the day, she was going to go to his house to check on him.

She was worried. Grier had let her know that he had suffered what sounded like flu-type symptoms at the church. She hoped he was just sleeping off whatever he was sick with. Her heart had squeezed painfully in her chest when she realized he was home, more or less alone, without anyone to check in on him. There had never been a time in her life when she had been sick and not had her mom there to take care of her. Gabe had no one.

She had waged a mental battle trying to decide if she should drive to his house last night. She had decided that he was probably sleeping and quite possibly, her visiting would be nothing more than an aggravation.

She had made unnecessary stops at her locker between her morning classes, coming away disappointed each time. Now she discreetly checked her phone again as she stuffed her books into her locker before lunch. She was surprised yet relieved to see that he’d finally left a message. Leaning into her locker, to keep her phone out of sight, she retrieved the voicemail.

His voice sounded awful. Ava attributed it to his being so sick the day before and possibly even still as he had not yet said if he was feeling better. When he spoke, her knees went weak.

Hey. I know I told you that nothing was bothering me but that wasn’t exactly true. The last few days I realized that you seem to be a lot more in to me than I am in to you. I feel like you’re getting too serious too quickly. I just don’t feel the same. Oh, I just realized you’re in school right now. Speaking of that, I never should have started dating someone still in high school. I think it’s best if we stop seeing each other completely.

“Ava?” Grier tentatively asked as she appeared in front of her. “Are you alright?”

“A">
“What’s wrong?” Molly added when she skidded to a stop in front of Ava’s locker.

“You look awful! Did you catch whatever Gabe had?” Julia looked alarmed as she joined their group.

Ava shook her head. Her face was pale and decidedly blank. She felt numb from the roots of her hair to the tips of her toes.

“No,” she slowly replied as she looked at her phone, still in her hand. “He just broke up with me.”

Molly’s mouth opened and closed a few times before she made it work. “What? Why?”

“Is that bad?” Grier wanted to know.

“Of course it’s bad,” Julia softly told Grier.

Ava hit the button that would repeat the message and handed her phone to Molly, who could not care less about discretion as she stood openly listening to it in the hallway. Julia leaned her head in so they could share the phone.

Grier crinkled her brow in confusion.

When the message was complete Molly jabbed the power button in consternation.

“Now?” she demanded. “
Now
he decides you’re too young for him? You’ve been together for months and we graduate in less than two weeks!”

“He’s lying,” Ava declared.

Grier nodded her head as if that was something she could understand.

“He sounds awful,” Molly said with a concerned wrinkle between her brows. “Maybe he has a fever and he’s delirious. He has to be talking nonsense because he cannot mean what he just said.”

Ava gave her a look that said she knew better.

“Can you two go get us some lunch and meet us outside?” Molly asked.

Julia agreed despite Ava’s protests that she wasn’t hungry. Molly took Ava by the arm, leading her out to the tree they often ate their lunch under. She darted concerned looks at Ava, who guessed she was worried she would burst into tearful theatrics.

She wouldn’t.

Not yet, anyway.

The day was cool and overcast. They both briefly wished they’d grabbed a coat but with the weather as it was, fewer students were likely to trickle outside. At the moment, everyone else seemed to either be eating inside or they were still purchasing their food. It gave them a semblance of privacy.

“He’s not going to do this,” Ava decided as she slumped onto the ground next to Molly. “I’m not going to let him get away with this. If I thought that he really felt that way, that he really meant it, I’d let it go. But I don’t believe him.”

“What are you going to do?” Molly asked.

The sound of resolute determination in Ava’s voice did not surprise her but she wasn’t sure it was for the best either. Something about Gabe had always made Molly feel a little uneasy. She could never pin down exactly what that something was. So as long as Ava seemed happy—and she did—Molly was willing to keep her opinion to herself.

“First, I’m going to call him. I need to start with that.” They were not allowed to use their phones inside the school but they weren’t monitored outdoors, on their lunch breaks. She called Gabe. It rang instead of going straight to voice mail but he didn’t answer. Frustrated, she texted a response instead.