Sweet Seduction Secrets (Sweet Seduction, Book 8): A Love At First Sight Romantic Suspense Series (31 page)

They didn’t just love their women. They claimed them, they treasured them, they let the world know how much they meant to them.

My eyes found Adam’s. I hadn’t meant them to. They just did. Drawn to him as I’d been drawn to him from the very start.

I saw it there. Open, such honesty. A look right into his heart and soul. He wanted this. For us. He wanted the world to know I was his and he was mine.

I shook my head.

He smiled.

Why did he smile?

And then Ben said, pulling back just far enough to rest his forehead against Abi’s brow, “That should do it, red. Nothin’ like a well loved woman to make a man spill his fuckin’ guts all over the floor.”

I started laughing. I couldn’t help it. Then Nick joined in, followed by Koki, Brook and Eric. Until the entire room was chuckling as Ben stood up straighter, crossing his arms over his buffed chest, and scowled.

Abi flicked a glance towards me and grinned.

It was the smile of a well loved woman.

It was a smile I’d never worn.

I wanted that smile. Fuck, did I ever.

But it couldn’t be mine.

I
t was
with a sense of numbness that I watched ASI shift into high gear. Jason and Abi were questioning Caleb and Ava up on one of the screens in control. Eric was surfing video footage from various CCTV cameras around the city, trying to locate the Director and Mal. Amber was sifting through my past, coming up with less than I’d read in my family’s single sheet dossier.

There should have been more and that was perhaps the biggest indication that something was wrong with my upbringing. With everything I thought I knew.

My eyes moved across the various screens to alight on the Department’s seal again. I stared at it, as though the answers lay within the emblem that had meant so fucking much to me until this morning.

Prevent. Protect. Provide.

The words were what I’d stood by for so many years. They were what had made sense when faced with such chaos. We prevented disasters. We protected our fellow countrymen. We provided the Government with intelligence in order to do both of those things.

But it was a lie.

We were nothing more than the Director’s personal army, dancing to his tune.

Who prevented this man from doing wrong?

Who protected our country against him?

Who provided the Government with this intelligence?

I smiled.

Very shortly we’d be facing off against the man I’d once considered a father figure. Time wasn’t on our side. We expected him to attack ASI. Nick and the two peas - Koki and Brook - were busy checking the building’s fortifications. Ben and Adam were loading weapons in the armoury. Carmel, who had refused to join her family at the safe house, was flitting between everyone, making sure they drank and ate something before the battle began.

But there was one thing I’d learnt in all my years as a specialist. Not all wars are won on the battlefield.

I crossed to the screen with the Department’s seal on it and looked down at the bench beneath it.

“Is there a keyboard linked into this?” I asked.

Eric pulled one out from beneath his position, attached something to a USB slot on its side, and handed it over.

“Now there is,” he said, returning his eyes to his own screen.

“What have you got in mind?” Amber asked, not looking up from a PDF document she was reading.

“An email,” I murmured, pulling a chair over and sitting down. I glanced up at the screen, then entered my login details and password.

Unlike my laptop, there was no fingerprint recognition or retinal scan. Somehow, Amber had bypassed that. But I was in. And the system showed me as the operator. I wanted to ask how she’d done it. I wanted to know if she’d cracked my profile or used a ghost. But none of it mattered. I was about to betray the one organisation that had provided me with so much.

And stolen everything.

My fingers hovered over the keyboard. My eyes stared unblinking up at the screen.

Then I started typing.

Locations. People. Dates. Assignments. Codes. Attachments. Profiles. Dossiers.
Everything
. I put it into black and white. I broke my vow of secrecy. I cut out my heart and let it bleed.

You want me, Director? By the time I’m finished, there won’t be a fucking thing left to kill.

“Charlie,” Adam said from over my shoulder some time later. I was unsure how long later. I’d been too absorbed. Delving into areas of the Department’s system that even Amber wouldn’t have been able to find.

I glanced up from what I’d been typing and took in the room. It was full again. And every eye was on the enlarged screen where my words were displayed as if magnified times a thousand.

“Are you sure about this?” Adam asked, his eyes moving from side to side as he continued to read.

Everything. It was all there. Where I’d been. Who I’d been. Why I’d been them. Everything. The past ten years whittled down to a single email with a zipped attachment file. My life on display for Nick and his men to read. No more secrets. There was nowhere to hide.

I turned back to look at what I’d just written, and then finished off the sentence as if Adam hadn’t just seen inside my skin.

I signed the email,
Charisse Catherine Bryce, Codename: Charlie Delta, Designation: Class A, Rank: Major.

“Fuck,” Jason said on a burst of air. “You outrank me.”

Someone chuckled. My finger hovered over the send button. Silence filled the room.

“Who’s it addressed to?” Nick asked, making me pause.

It might have been a futile delay tactic, but I moved my finger from the send button and scrolled the email to the top. The address field had several names of members of parliament; some of which were prominent ministers. The Prime Minister. The Deputy Prime Minister. The Minister of Defence. The Minister of Justice. The Minister of National Security and Intelligence. The Minister in Charge of the NZ Intelligence Service. The Minister Responsible for the GCSB. The Attorney General. The list went on, including members of the opposition Labour Party. The Greens. New Zealand First. Act. The Māori Party. And United Future. Then names of prominent journalists and broadcasters, right down to controversial news blogs and websites.

There were some fifty email addresses all told.

“Fucking hell,” Jason said, his voice awed. “When you go big, you don’t muck around.”

I stared at the screen, feeling the weight of what I was about to do. It went against every ounce of training I’d ever received.

“This will have a catastrophic roll-on effect,” Nick murmured softly to my side. “Are you sure you want to include those two in amongst the names?”

I smiled. Two prominent journalists. One on the Internet. One on TV. Each equally outspoken.

I wasn’t sure. I wasn’t sure about anything. But I’d had enough of lies and secrets. And betrayal.

“Get Caleb and Ava in here,” I whispered.

“The spooks? In control?” Jason demanded. “Are you mad?”

I turned to look up at him. He was serious. Caleb and Ava were still spies to him. I was not.

It threw me.

“I can patch them in,” Eric offered, picking up a tablet computer and entering a command. The screen shifted to a view of control. Or more precisely, a view of the screen I’d just been using. Nothing else that could compromise ASI, but enough for me to warn them.

They’d saved my life once. The least I could do was prepare them for the fall-out.

Nick nodded his head, and Eric stood up, exiting the silent room. Tension hung all around us; sharp as knives.

If I did this, there would be no more Department.

If I did this, not just Caleb, Ava and myself would be out of a job, but others. Reid. Joel. Hamish. Will. Sofia. Brayton. All of their handlers. All of the support staff, the analysts who worked tirelessly and unseen in the archives under the Department’s high security building. All of them.

I felt sick and it had nothing to do with a trigger.

“You’re on, Charlie,” came Eric’s voice over the speakers. “Caleb and Ava are reading the email now.”

Somehow it made it easier to breathe. I’m not sure why, but it did. Knowing two of my former colleagues knew everything. None of their jobs were listed here. Except China. None of their roles or objectives. None of their secrets or lies. Just mine. Mine, and by extension, the Director’s.

Which meant anything they’d done in the past would be under scrutiny too.

“You’ve got balls of fucking steel, I’ll give you that, Charles,” Caleb said after some time of strained silence. “You’d sink us all for revenge?”

“You think this is revenge?” I asked, amused.

“Not my head the Director wants to hack off.”

“Are you so sure, Hart?”

“Pretty much. If they’d wanted me killed, they could have done it when I was discovered entering Auckland in search of you.”

“Charlie,” Ava said, interrupting any retort I may have had. “The Department is secret for a reason. You know this. What we do cannot become public knowledge. The general population would not understand the circumstances that require our existence.”

“Everything,
everyone
, should be held accountable for their actions,” I murmured.

“True,” Caleb offered. “And in some ways, I agree with your lunacy. But…”

“There is no but,” I said steadily. “The Director has taken over control of the largest drug cartel to come out of China and he’s done it using the Department’s assets.”

Silence. They knew I was right. Perhaps there was a more eloquent way to achieve this. To stop the man before he took our country down; polluted it; destroyed it. Did everything we had been sworn not to do.

Perhaps. But I couldn’t see it. And part of me willed Caleb or Ava to offer an alternate solution. To come up with a plan in the next few minutes - minutes, I was sure, were all we had - and save me from destroying the one thing that had meant family to me. Even family in its most dysfunctional sense.

But they didn’t. They said nothing.

I lowered my head and took in a few fortifying breaths of air.

This had to be done.

“I’m sorry,” I said, to them, to no one. Just words drifting away on the still air.

My hand came up and I hit enter on the keyboard, then lifted weary eyes to watch the progress bar as the email was sent.

“Well,” Caleb said, after a lengthy pause. “I guess we’re out of a job, then.”

But I couldn’t hear the anger in his tone. Although, this
was
Caleb Hart. If he was feeling it, I wouldn’t have known.

“What now?” Ava asked.

“Now we finish this, before the shit hits the fan,” I offered. Once Parliament realised the veracity of that intelligence, all hell would break loose.

“You’ll need our help,” Caleb offered. “This new family of yours is impressive, but we’re talking about the man who’s headed up the highest ranking security agency in New Zealand. He won’t play nice.”

“Actually,” Nick said, entering the conversation smoothly. “We’re better suited than you spooks.”

“How’s that?” Caleb demanded.

“We’re not the ones with unpredictable triggers.”

Fuck. He was right. How the hell did we combat that?

“Regardless,” Caleb replied steadily. “You need us. You have no idea who you’re about to face.”

“We’re on home territory,” Nick pointed out. “We know the battleground better than him. I think we’ll do OK.”

“Confident words for a dead man,” Caleb drawled.

This was devolving. Time to put a stop to it before someone got hurt. Two days ago I would have put money on Nick coming off second best. But things had changed since then.

I looked toward ASI’s boss; he stood tall, back straight, eyes likes chips of ice, arms crossed over his chest, scowling. Almost every other person in the room mimicked him. They were in this to the end, despite it not being their battle. They’d committed to it, despite it not being their mess to clean up. They’d stand strong. For me? Or for the city? The country? I wasn’t sure. But I admired these people, right then.

I admired them a fucking lot.

“You need us, Nick,” I said, putting an end to the pissing contest.

His cool blue eyes met mine. I held his level stare.

“I trust you,” I announced, feeling the truth in the words. Feeling the monumental shift in the air of the room. “I trust you to do what’s right.”

He held my gaze with a steady one of his own, seeing more than the words had intended.

A slow nod of his head was all I got. He understood what I was asking.

Adam stepped forward, body tense, eyes narrowed.

“What the fuck was that?” he growled, low and hard.

“Something between Nick and me,” I replied, moving to stand before him. “Leave it. OK?”

“No.” He shook his head to emphasis that. “No,” he said more softly, reaching up and cupping my cheek. “I won’t let it come to that.”

It was a promise he couldn’t keep.

“No,” he reiterated, the rest of the room forgotten. “We’ll get through this. Somehow. You and me.”

“Adam,” I said, pulling on
everything
. “There is no you and me.”

He stared down at me, his eyes darting all over my face. Searching for the truth. He wouldn’t find it. I was Charlie Delta, right then. Charlie Downes, the spy. One last time, I was pulling on everything I’d every been taught. Everything I’d ever been brainwashed to be.

The farther away from me he was when the trigger was used, the better.

This is me letting you go, Stalker. Letting you live.

Please live.

“No,” he said, a soft smile playing on the edges of his lips that had no right to be there. “This is me catching you.”

Son of a bitch.

“Oh no,” Amber suddenly squeaked from her seat in front of the screens.

“What is it?” Nick demanded, the rest of the room diverting their attention to the IT guru and away from the sentimental scene Adam and I had been playing.

“They’re not coming to us,” she replied, tapping away furiously on her keyboard.

The door to control opened and Eric walked in. His eyes on his wife, not the screen. Behind him stood Caleb and Ava; none the worse for wear. Their eyes taking in everything. Nick spared them a glance, but didn’t seem angered or surprised to see them. He must have given the order to Eric when I’d been distracted. My gaze flicked involuntarily towards Adam.

His were on the screen.

I turned and looked at what had everyone in a lather. For a second I couldn’t decipher what I was seeing.

And then I knew. I’d been there. With Amber. Sharing a coffee and a chocolate treat.

The Director wasn’t coming to ASI to face us.

He wanted us to come to him.

“Tell me you shut that place down today,” I said softly.

“It’s closed,” Nick replied. “But not the street.”

“You can’t close High Street on a Friday,” someone said numbly.

“Ah, fuck it,” Ben growled. “Gen’s not gonna like this.”

“Who do you trust in the Police?” I demanded, moving closer to the screen and watching the unknown male, who I assumed was Mal, making an espresso at the gleaming, overlarge coffee machine. The Director sat at a nearby table, a cup already in his hand. Black with hot pink writing. On it, I knew it said,
Sweet Seduction on High
.