Sweet Obsession (20 page)

“Fuck me! Now, Nidal! Fuck me!” I cried feverently.

Nidal growled savagely, and he pulled his body upward and entered me, slamming into me wildly. Unleashing his passion inside me as he thrust himself deeper and deeper until his body jerked with spasms of electricity. I wondered how he could still have cravings for me, even though I was so huge. He did not seem to mind. In fact, he told me he was aroused even more this time around because he had missed me so much. All the months he was away from me left him aching for my body. Nidal told me that he did not care what I looked like. He loved me no matter what. To him, I was still the most beautiful woman in the world.

Nidal’s appetite was huge, and he ate so much food. I watched him gobble down beef, baked potatoes, freshly baked bread, and hot apple pie, and he washed it down with red wine. I was not hungry at all. I nibbled on some bread and drank orange juice. We ate in our room, not wanting anyone to bother us. I waited patiently for Nidal to finish. I wanted to ask him a thousand questions about the war. I wanted to share my experience of this pregnancy with him. I was simply overjoyed that he was home.

When Nidal finished eating, he gulped down the rest of his wine, and then without hesitation, he pulled me close, and I eagerly slid into his arms and closed my eyes, trying to take it all in. Life was beautiful. Nidal was beautiful, and I was happy. But I did not know how long this mood would last. There were many issues to be resolved. And I dreaded each and every one of them. The baby kicked all day long, and Nidal took every opportunity to rest his hand on my stomach and feel his child kick. I felt very blessed, but I knew it would not last.
Nothing lasts forever
.

The next day, I went looking to find the queen. Nidal was busy with the king, going over political things. With some free time on my hands, I thought to visit Her Majesty and ask if she wanted to take a stroll with me in the gardens.

I was almost at the glass doors that overlooked the gardens when I heard voices coming from the outside. I stopped in my tracks. One voice was the queen’s; the other sounded like Princess Shaeena’s. Immediately, I felt dizzy as I swooned on my feet. I stepped over to the stone wall and leaned on it for support. I could feel my heart pound at a fast pace as sweat formed on my forehead. I was angry at myself that she had this effect on me. I had not seen her since Nidal left for the war. And now she reappeared conveniently, just a few days after Nidal’s arrival. Angry with myself for getting upset, I walked over to the glass doors and peeked outside.

She was there, sitting down with the queen, sipping tea, and looking comfortable as if it were her right to be there, as if she had not overstepped her boundaries the last time she was here. I pulled the doors open abruptly, and stiff as a board, walked over to them. The queen looked uncomfortable when I looked at her, and then I turned to Shaeena’s direction. The ice-cold stare that she gave me sent shivers up and down my spine, but that was nothing in comparison to what I felt when my eyes rested on her lap.

I froze. My voice failed me. I could not believe what I saw. There in front of me was Shaeena, staring coldly at me with a bleak smile and looking 100 percent pregnant. The blood drained from my face, and I felt like I was going to pass out. The queen immediately stood and grabbed me, preventing me from falling to the ground.

“Loula dear, are you feeling under the weather?” the queen asked with sincere concern in her voice.

I looked at her, and she immediately understood. Shaeena looked pleased that she had this effect on me. A smug grin was on her face. My baby was kicking in my stomach so hard, as if he too knew the effect this woman was having on me. I studied her face right before I spoke. She really did a good job hiding her misery. But I knew better. I had what she wanted, and it killed her.

The pregnancy was a huge surprise to me, and even if I tried to ignore it, the fact still remained that she was pregnant and she would probably claim that Nidal was the father. She looked about seven months pregnant, which would have placed conception at the same time that Nidal had spent three nights in her bed. So Nidal had lied to me.
He had slept with her! And this was the result! How would he deny this?

“Hello, Shaeena,” I said sweetly, trying hard not to slap her hard across the face. “It is very nice to see you again,” I lied.

But Shaeena was sly as a fox. She knew I was suffering at this moment. The queen sat back in her chair and stared at us cautiously. I pulled an empty chair closer to Shaeena and sat in it, thinking my feet could not support my weight anymore. “So, what brings you by? We haven’t seen you since before the war. How are you faring?” I asked with trembling lips, ignoring the fact that she was pregnant.

“Well, Loula, as you can see, I am pregnant, and Nidal is the father,” she said straightforward, as if that were not a bomb she just dropped casually in my lap.

The queen was sipping her tea, and when Shaeena made her announcement, she almost choked.

“Why are the both of you acting as if it is a surprise?” Shaeena asked innocently. “I told you then, Loula, that Nidal spent three nights in my room before he went to war. You were a fool not to believe me,” she said smugly. “And you, my queen, are sitting here with me all this time, and not once did you care to ask if I were pregnant and whose child I was carrying!” she said boldly. “Your son slept with me, and now I am pregnant.” She looked at the queen as if daring her to deny the baby’s paternity.

The queen looked as if the cat had her tongue. All color had vanished from her face as she looked at me apologetically. By this time, I was fuming.
How dare Princess Shaeena come here and tell us all these lies! How dare she try to pin this on Nidal!

I got up from my chair and said coldly, “How dare you throw your accusations around and expect us to believe them! I insist you leave us and never come back! We all have had enough of your wanton behavior!” I yelled, not caring who heard me.

The queen sat in her chair, stunned, not saying a single word. I was beside myself with anger. Life was not fair. I knew not what to do. I wanted to strangle Shaeena with my bare hands.

“Get out of here!” I yelled at Shaeena.

Shaeena rose from her chair. Her stomach was huge as she stepped aside and marched toward the palace without saying a word.
She is going to find Nidal!

I marched beside her. “I said you are to remove yourself from this property before I throw you out, whore!” I yelled.

But Shaeena kept walking toward the palace without an ounce of embarrassment. She was full of arrogance.

As the princess reached the first step, the queen ran along beside her and begged, “Please, Shaeena, don’t make a spectacle of yourself. Go home, child.”

The princess angrily turned toward the queen and pointed a finger at her. “Shame on you. I just told you I’m pregnant with your grandchild, and you disrespect me in this way! The both of you will regret this day! My father will hear about your behavior, and I promise you that he will be livid!”

She turned away, and we scrambled after her.

I came to the queen’s defense. “How dare you speak to the queen like that! Who do you think you are?” I spat. I climbed the stairs, trying to maintain my balance, as I reached the step that Shaeena stood on.

In that instant, Nidal heard all the commotion and came running out. “Ladies, please, you are making spectacles of yourselves out here in front of the servants. Behave yourselves!” He looked at the three of us, oblivious to the real problem at hand.

We all stopped and looked at him angrily. He looked from me to his mother and then rested his eyes on Shaeena. “What pray tell is your problem, Shaeena—” He paused when his eyes landed on her stomach.

He stared at her wide-eyed and speechless. The princess looked at him with satisfaction. She let him swallow the revelation before she announced to him sweetly, “Nidal, I’m pregnant, and you are the father of my baby!” She eagerly waited for his reply.

It was as if time stood still for all of us. Nidal just stood there, stunned. He was at a loss for words. I saw the different emotions that played on Nidal’s face.
Why is he even hesitating to deny her accusations? Could it be true? Could Nidal be the father of Shaeena’s baby?
I felt dizzy, but I held my ground, desperately waiting for a denial. But it never came.

Shaeena sat there, pleased with the results. “It’s your baby, Nidal,” she said convincingly enough.

Again, Nidal did not deny or accept her words. He turned slowly and looked at me confused. I knew that look. He was trying to think back on those three days he had spent with Shaeena almost seven months ago.

“Shaeena, that’s a lie! Nidal would never betray me for a tramp like you!” I screamed.

The princess spoke without thinking. “Shut up, bitch!”

Nidal immediately came to my defense, saying furiously in his rich Arabian accent, “Madam, contain yourself. Do you know who you are talking to? Loula will be the next queen of Arabia. How dare you speak to her in such a manner!”

Shaeena turned toward me, and in slow motion, she reached over and pushed me. I lost my balance, tumbled down the stairs, and rolled onto my stomach. I felt numb as all three of them came running down the stairs to where I lay. Nidal lifted me cautiously into his arms and cried out to the servants who had popped out of nowhere to get the doctor.

I blacked out for a second, and when I came to, I felt excruciating pain in my stomach. I lay in a fetal position trying to deal with the pain. Nidal was crying as he held me close to him, whispering his love for me. Shaeena was behind him, afraid she had gone too far, and the queen went running to the palace to look for the king.

As I lay there in Nidal’s arms, I felt something wet underneath my gown. I shut my eyes as the tears rolled down my face. The pain was pulling on my stomach. “Nidal! I think I am bleeding! Please save our baby, Nidal! Please, don’t let my baby die,” I pleaded.

Nidal cried out when he saw the blood seep through the gown. “Oh, God, no! Please, God. Save Loula and my baby, please,” he begged. “Please, God, do not let anything happen to Loula and my baby, please,” he begged, crying his heart out.

The doctor, having moved into the guest quarters awaiting the birth of our baby, came running and yelled for everyone to step aside. He examined me, right there on the lawn in broad daylight, and after a few minutes, he shook his head sadly. I held my breath for the next words that came out of his mouth, and I was sure they would strike like a knife through my heart.

“Call for help, Nidal. I need to do surgery on Loula immediately,” he said without any hope in his voice.

There was silence in the air, as we all tried to come to terms with the outcome. The pain was shooting up my back, and I screamed aloud. I could not think clearly at this time. The baby was not kicking anymore. I was petrified, and I did not know if the baby were still alive.

Nidal lifted me in his strong arms and took me inside the palace, in a room that was set aside for medical emergencies only. The doctor ordered everyone out, but Nidal insisted on staying, saying he was not going anywhere. The doctor eventually gave in, not having enough time to argue with him. The queen had ordered the servants to bring hot towels and clean sheets to the room, and a few servants stayed in the room to assist the doctor. The last thing I remember was Nidal’s hands holding mine as he cried a river. Then I passed out.

There was hardly any light in the room when I opened my eyes slowly. The first thing I saw was Nidal right by my side. His eyes were red and swollen. He looked down at me with the saddest expression on his face. The tears started again as he sobbed like a child. He brought my hand to his lips and cried his heart out. That could only mean one thing. My baby had not made it. I tried speaking, but no words came out of my mouth. I was frozen.

Then tears welled up in my eyes, but that was about it. My tears dried up quickly. I lay there staring up at Nidal hopeless. I slowly pulled my hand away from his grip. Nidal stood still. He had noticed my withdrawal. Alarmed, he pulled my hand back in his. At this moment, I felt numb. I blamed Nidal for everything. It was his fault! He was the one who did this to me. He was the one who allowed that bitch to act as if she had a hold on him. He was the one who got her pregnant, and because of him, I had lost my baby. I felt empty, like my world had come crumbling down and shattered everything that mattered to me. I felt all alone, like I had no one I could trust anymore.

I stared coldly at Nidal and said in a clipped tone, “Leave this room.”

“No Loula, I am not leaving you.” He said softly.

But when I looked at him with cold eyes he cringed and took a step backward. His eyes pleaded for me to understand that he loved me. But my eyes pleaded for him to leave me alone. I could not accept his apology at this time. I just wanted to be left alone. I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep, but he would not budge. Eventually, I slept from exhaustion.

The next time I woke up, the sun had disappeared, and it was almost dark in the room. Sitting next to me was Nidal, and he was still holding on to my hand. He stood immediately when he saw I had awakened and told me how much he loved me. I ignored him and closed my eyes again, praying for sleep once again. I did not want to deal with Nidal now. I had nothing to say to him.

The next couple of days, I was in and out of sleep. Nidal was always sitting next to me, waiting for me to wake up and speak to him. I refused. I was still not ready to say anything to him. My innocent, little baby was dead. Gone just like that. From one second to the next.

When I opened my eyes on the third day, the sun was shining in the room, and Nidal was still sitting next to me, looking at me with sadness. “Please, Loula, talk to me. Allow me in your thoughts. Let me soothe your pain,” he begged. “Please, I need you now. Don’t shut me out,” he cried.

I looked at him, but the feelings I once felt were not there anymore. I did not want him to touch me. I did not want him around. I needed some alone time. “Nidal, please, let me be. I need to be alone right now. Please go. I’m in mourning. Don’t you understand? My baby died!” I cried.