Sweet Contradiction (9 page)

“Who do you think you are?” Beau’s eyes were wild, his hand held me in a bruising grasp. I tried to yank my arm free, but his grip only tightened more, making me wince in pain.

“Let go of me right now, Beau,” I demanded as calmly as I could, though I was quaking on the inside.

“You think you’re so much better than me?” he asked roughly. “Poor little Beth,” he sneered. “What’s worse I wonder? Being known as the town whore or the daughter of the town religious freaks?” My hand flew out and the crack of my hand hitting his cheek seemed to echo all around me. Sweet Jesus.
What had I done?
I thought. His head snapped to the side from the force of my blow and his nostrils flared slightly when he turned back to face me. The look on his face and the dangerous gleam in his eyes chilled the blood in my veins. In a split second, his hand cocked back and swung out in full force and everything seem to happen in slow motion. All I could do was prepare myself for the impact.

Out of my peripheral vision I saw a shadow move just before someone snatched Beau’s hand out of mid-air and pulled him back away from me. I stumbled to the side and landed on my knees on the sidewalk. My ears were ringing from a spike in adrenaline. I could barely hear Jen saying my name through the wad of cotton that had been stuffed in my ears. Jen’s hand was on my arms and she was screaming at someone. I stood up with Jen’s help, and for the first time I noticed that Matt had Beau in a death grip, his body tense and menacing, ready to do bodily harm to the scum who’d put his hand on me. I stepped forward on wobbly legs and put a hand on Matt’s back.

“Forget it, Matt. It isn’t worth it.” Matt stiffened when I touched him. He turned his eyes to meet mine and I realized just how close he was to pounding Beau into the asphalt. His eyes ran over me, taking stock of any injuries. When he saw the marks on my arm, angry and red from Beau’s grip, his jaw clenched and his hand fisted tighter in Beau’s shirt. “Please, Matt. Don’t give him the satisfaction,” I pleaded. I was so tired. I just wanted to go back to Jen’s and forget about everything. The storm in Matt’s eyes clamed fractionally as he slowly loosened his grip on Beau’s shirt and gave him a little shove away. I breathed out a breath of relief and placed my hand on Matt’s still-tense arm. “Thank you,” I said softly. Matt sucked in a sharp breath when Beau let out a nasty laugh. My grip tightened on Matt’s forearm.

“The town whore and the pure preacher’s son? You’ve got to be kidding me.” Beau cackled and then stepped forward within arm’s reach. “Did she already spread her luscious thighs for you, Rev?” he spat. Matt’s arm swung out before any of us saw it coming. Jen gasped just as Beau’s head snapped back and his body hit the pavement like the sack of manure he was. I couldn’t summon a single morsel of concern. Jen’s mouth was hanging open in a fish-out-of-water imitation and Matt was standing there looking three parts angry and one part shocked he’d just knocked a guy out cold.

“I’ll call you later, Beth,” Matt said after a few moments of stunned silence. His eyes met mine and he waited until I nodded to walk quickly away from the crowd that was gathering around the spectacle we’d just put on. I didn’t blame him. I’d run like hell from anyone who’d put me through this much trouble too. I watched him as he headed toward the open produce market. I was already feeling the loss of his presence. This was exactly what I had been wanting all along, though, I reminded myself.

“Let’s go home, Jen.” I sighed and rubbed a hand over the tender, already bruising spot on my upper arm. Jen nodded and stepped around Beau’s prone figure to get to my truck.

My mind was a torrent of thoughts by the time we made it back to the house and I knew I would have to work out the over flow of emotions and feelings so my body would be able to relax by the evening. I helped Jen put away the groceries in silence before asking her the question that had been weighing most heavily on my mind since the scene in the grocery store parking lot.

“Matt is the son of a Pastor?” I asked as I stacked the can goods in the pantry.

“Yes. His dad is Pastor Wright of New Hope Community Church just outside of town.” Jen sighed heavily and sat down at the table once all the groceries were put away.

“And I take it he isn’t like the rebellious, bad boy, cliché preacher kid type?” I knew the answer in my heart to the question, that Matt wasn’t, that he was probably the spittin’ image of his religious daddy. Jen gazed at me, her eyes saying she was sorry and how much she wished I’d had a normal upbringing, that I didn’t have issues with religion in general.

“He’s a Sunday school teacher. The children in his class adore him. He never misses a Sunday and punching the crap out of Beau, though well deserved, was definitely out of the norm for him.” She let out a shaky breath and searched my face. I stood there for a few minutes, unable to think clearly. Jen had just confirmed everything I’d already figured out, but it was painful to hear said out loud. Matt was completely off my radar and I had to back the hell away from having anything to do with him.

“Please say something.”

I clenched my jaw and met her worried gaze. “It’s fine.” I waved a hand and walked over and opened the back door.

“What are you doing?” she asked quietly.

“I’m going to work in the garden. I need some time to process everything.” I smiled what I hoped was a convincing smile and shut the door behind me.

I threw myself into my work in the back yard. I pulled weeds, pruned back the rose bushes and even built a pretty red brick border around the herb garden. I found myself relaxing, if just a little, as I put all my energy into one of the few things I’d missed when I left the country life. There was nothing quite like burying your hands in the earth, nurturing plants, watching them flourish and bloom all because of your hard work and tender care.

A few hours later, Jen came outside with an ice cold glass of sweet tea and told me that Matt was on the phone for the third time. I shook my head and sat up on the steps of the back porch to enjoy my tea in the afternoon breeze. I couldn’t talk to him just yet. Jen didn’t say anything, just went inside and left me with my thoughts and the midday sun. When my tea was finished, I grabbed a bucket and filled it with cold, soapy water and began scrubbing the back porch on my hands and knees. My arms began to shake slightly in exhaustion, but I worked relentlessly on getting the back porch spotless.

Everything I’d been concerned about getting involved with Matt had just quadrupled. It was more than the fact that he broke all my rules for dating … he was a freakin’ preacher’s son. He was so different from my normal dating pattern, that it was ridiculous. Not only that, but he was very involved in his church and religion. I just couldn’t go there. I couldn’t give him the kind of relationship he would be looking for. The perfect girlfriend who would hold his hand and attend services together and plan out their perfect, two-point-five kid family, who would be raised in a tiny town and taught to fear a god who would watch their every move. That they would have to fear committing that magical, elusive thing that could send them to a pit of fire for their transgressions. I clenched my teeth and scrubbed with renewed vigor.

My mind traveled back to a particularly painful memory from my childhood. I was only twelve at the time, a vulnerable age, going through puberty, my body starting to undergo awkward changes. I’d never forget the day I started my menstrual cycle. Jen had already begun hers and assured me it was normal. Her mother talked with me and gave me a box of personal items, she even took me out for an ice cream to “celebrate”. I, of course, had to tell my mom that evening that I had started.

I tried to just breeze past the topic, assure her I knew what was happening, and then quickly change the subject. Unfortunately, my mom and dad had to take the opportunity to remind me how my body was changing and that I would have to work extra hard to be more godly and curb my womanly nature to engage in sinful, carnal acts of the flesh. My father made sure I knew that as a woman it would come natural for me to act on my “instincts” and give in to my whorish impulses that could lead me onto a path that would surely lead me straight to the gates of Hell.

Now that I thought back on that day and so many others like it, I could see why Beau Montgomery pissed me off as much as he did when he spread all those false rumors about me being loose in high school. Part of me was afraid that everything my dad said was true, part of me was scared shitless that I was just as broken and sinful as I was told I was and that I deserved whatever eternal hell I would find at the end of my life. Part of me wished I could have been the perfect, straight-and-narrow daughter my daddy always said he wished he’d had. Instead, he’d gotten me.

“Wait, she doesn’t want to talk right now … give her a few days.” Jen’s voice sounded panicked from around the side of the house. Matt came striding around the house, his eyes glinting dangerously. A man on a mission. I was still on my hands and knees with suds all around me.

“Why wouldn’t you take my calls?” Matt demanded. He spoke through clenched teeth and his eyes dared me to say I hadn’t been avoiding talking to him.

“Tell me right now if you want him gone, Beth, and I’ll throw his country bumpkin behind right off my property!” Jen’s hands were on her hips, her hair was coming loose from her braid, and little wisps were flying all around her head, making her look like a crazed momma hen. She had to be at least six inches shorter than Matt and fifty pounds lighter, but she meant every word she said, even if it were technically impossible for her to follow through. Matt’s brow rose in surprise.

“It’s okay, Jen. I’ll talk to him.” I sighed. “But, um, thanks for the offer.” She cast one last glare in Matt’s direction before turning to huff back to the front of the house.

“She can be terrifying,” Matt murmured.

“You have no idea,” I grumbled.

“So, I’ll be coming here to pick you up in a few days for our date,” he announced, his eyes never wavering from mine. I shook my head and opened my mouth to reply. “That’s all I was calling about, to make sure you knew when to be ready for our date.”

“Matt … I just don’t think that is a good idea.” I sat back on my heels, dropped the scrub brush I’d been holding, and wiped my hand on my jean shorts.

“Why? Because of what happened this morning in town?” he asked, his eyes searching mine. “Because that wasn’t your fault, you know. And I would have done the exact same thing if it had been you, my momma, or any other woman who needed my help.”

“It’s not just that, Matt. It’s just not going to work between me and you, you have to see that.” I stood up and made my way over to stand in front of him. “You are a good man, I can tell that, but just not the man for me.” A sharp pain of doubt pierced my chest, but I continued on. “I can’t be the person you would need to me to be. I’m not good enough for you.” Matt sighed and lifted his hand to tuck a strand of hair gently behind my ear. I closed my eyes and sucked in a quick breath. Never before had I wanted something so badly.

“So, let me get this straight,” he whispered hoarsely. “You know me better than I know myself and that means you know you are no good for me.” My eyes opened and I found Matt’s golden eyes glinting in the afternoon sunlight, his jaw clenched in restrained anger.

“That’s not …” I began.

“Also, I’m too good for you, meaning if I were a little more … what? A little more dangerous? Maybe unreliable? Selfish? I’d have a chance with you?” he growled.

“No. You’re perfect,” I soothed. “It’s me. I have … issues. I can’t be the perfect woman you deserve.”

“I’m not looking for perfect, I’m looking for real. I’m looking for passion and love, Babe.” He leaned forward until his lips grazed my ear lobe, freezing me in place. “Now get your pretty little behind in the house, get some rest and begin planning what you’ll wear on our date like normal women do,” he breathed against my neck. I shivered and stepped back quickly, shaking my head.

“Matt, I’m not going and that’s final. I’m doing this for both of us.”

“You’re doing this because you’re scared, Beth, and I understand that. But, I’m not going to let your fears keep us from exploring what we have between us. Besides, I won a bet and I plan on calling it in.” He smiled and pointed to the back door. I put my hand on my hips and arched a brow.

“I’d hate to make a scene …” he began, his eyes turned towards the sky like he was consulting a higher power. He caught my eyes and I saw only a spark of danger before it was too late. “But … okay!”

I squealed and tried to evade his arms when he launched himself in my direction. He had the element of surprise on his side, though, and before I knew it, I’d been thrown over his shoulder and popped soundly on the behind. “Stop wiggling, Babe.” He laughed.

“Matthew Wright! You put me down this instant!” I shouted as he swung open the back door and marched me through the kitchen. Another pop on my behind and I was fuming.

“This woulda been a whole lot easier if you’d just admit how much you want my bod,” he announced cheerfully as we passed Jen, who was standing in slack-jawed shock with a hand towel thrown over her shoulder.

“Matt, stop acting like a caveman. Where are you taking me?” I screeched. We were now climbing the stairs to the second floor. My energy had begun to leak out from putting up a fight, all the gardening, and manic scrubbing I’d done.

“Which one is her room?” Matt asked a now devilishly grinning Jen. I pushed my hair out of my eyes and watched as she pointed out my bedroom—the two timing hussy! Before launching me onto my bed, Matt slapped my behind a third time. I landed on my back, staring up at my ceiling, unable to even summon the strength to make a dignified bounce back.

“So, you going to get a shower and then behave like a sane person? Or am I going to have to help you with that too?” he asked, his grin telling me how incredibly appealing he found the idea. I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to look as pious as I could, knowing I’d just been treated like a naughty child.

“I’ll get a shower and I’ll go on your date,” I grumbled. He smiled wickedly and his eyes heated into liquid pools of amber.