Authors: Edmund Crispin
âCan't hear a word you're saying.'
âWere you with Charles Shorthouse last night?'
âYes.' The aged Wilkes spoke more soberly, though there was still a malignant gleam in his alligator eye. âAnd with his succubus.'
âHis succubus?' Fen was startled.
âThorn.' Wilkes spoke emphatically and clearly, as though addressing himself to rather a slow understanding. âThe name is Thorn. A small, hyena-like woman.'
âAh.'
âWe drank coffee together,' said Wilkes dreamily. âI imagine they arrived at half past ten. Then at eleven they suddenly made off.'
âMade off?'
âThat's what I said,' said Wilkes. âHeh. They made off. In pursuance, I imagined, of some bodily necessity.' He lingered over the delicate obliquity of this statement. âBut on reflexion,' he continued reluctantly, âI don't think that can have been the reason. For one thing, they weren't back until half past eleven.'
âThey left, and came back, together?'
Wilkes assented, with a regal nod.
âAnd didn't they give any explanation of their absence?'
âNow let me see.' Wilkes' gaze wandered about the lounge, seeming to seek inspiration in its mock-Tudor fireplace and leather-covered armchairs. âYes. Now I remember. Shorthouse explained to me, in confidence, that he was intending to kill his brother.'
Fen moved convulsively, and upset an ash-tray into his lap.
âReally,' he grumbled, brushing himself disjointedly, âthat is the limit . . . I presume you didn't take this seriously?'
âOn the whole, no.' Wilkes began to display interest. âBut
did
he, in fact . . . ?'
âSomeone did.'
âWell, I never,' said Wilkes.
âCharles Shorthouse and the Thorn woman,' said Adam, âhave no alibi, then?'
âNo. Nor has Stapleton. Nor has Judith Haynes.' Fen blew his nose with a trumpeting sound. âWell, there's nothing to be gained from sitting here.' He got to his feet.
âWhere are you going now?' Wilkes demanded.
âI shan't tell you,' said Fen offensively, âbecause if I did you'd come tagging along behind. You were quite enough of a nuisance during that toyshop business. You stole a bicycle,' he added reproachfully.
âHeh,' said Wilkes, pleased. âSo I did. For two pins I'd steal another.'
âYou stay here and get quietly drunk.'
âBy the way,' said Wilkes. âI found that whisky you'd hidden behind your books.'
Fen stared at him in exasperation. âReally, Wilkes, I hope you didn't take it. You don't seem to realize how difficult it is to get.'
âIt isn't difficult to get,' Wilkes pointed out, âwhen one has access to
your
rooms.'
âYou must put it back at once, Wilkes.'
âCan't hear you.'
âI said,
thief
.'
âYes,' said Wilkes thoughtfully, âthe wind's bitter. I shouldn't be surprised if we had a really heavy fall of snow.'
They left him. In the entrance-hall they were met by a page-boy with a message for Adam.
âGood Lord,' Adam exclaimed in dismay after reading it, âthey're having a rehearsal and they want to know why I'm not there.' He looked at his watch. âI'm a bit late, but I suppose I can still get to some of it . . . Oh, blast.'
âWhere is your wife, one wonders?'
âSomewhere about, I expect. I'd better try and get hold of her before I go off to the theatre.' Adam went to the reception desk. âThe key of room 72, please.'
âI think Mrs Langley took it, sir, about an hour ago.'
âI imagine she's upstairs,' said Adam, rejoining Fen.
They took the lift, and walked along a passage prolific of giggling chambermaids to room 72. Adam knocked. For a moment there was no reply.
âOdd,' he said. âI suppose she must have gone off somewhere with the key.' He knocked again.
Then there was a small movement on the other side of the door, and they heard Elizabeth say in a low voice:
âWho is it?'
âIt's me, darling. Adam.'
âHave you got someone with you?'
âOnly Professor Fen. Are you undressed, or something?'
The door opened, and Elizabeth stood in the gap. She
was pale, and breathing quickly, and she looked very young and defenceless. She said:
âOh . . . Adam . . .'
He took her in his arms. âMy dear, what is it?'
She attempted to smile. âIt's just â ignoble panic,' she said, and they realized that she was very near to tears. âYou see â someone's been trying to poison me.'
THE ROOM WAS
as undistinguished as most hotel bedrooms, with its discreet printed injunctions, its elaborate apparatus of blinds and curtains, and its multiplicity of lights: and though Adam and Elizabeth had been there long enough to impress a certain amount of character on its blankness, it remained at bottom obstinately functional. Fen settled in an armchair, after casting his hat inaccurately at a hook on the door, and offered them cigarettes.
âWell?' he queried.
âAconitine,' said Elizabeth briefly. âIn the tea.'
They all looked at the tray. There was a full cup on it, now almost cold.
âHow do you know?' said Fen.
âIt comes of poring over these things. I held a little in my mouth, and it made my lips go numb.'
âYou must have had some reason for suspecting.'
âSuspecting,' Elizabeth repeated wryly. Her big eyes, with their uneven, sardonic brows, were very grave. âYes. I had reason enough. You seeâ'
She went on to narrate, in detail, the events of the afternoon.
âSo you can understand,' she concluded, âjust why I began to have doubts about the tea.' She gestured apologetically. âWhen one's studying these things, one gets cagey â just as medical students tend to credit themselves with having the diseases they're working on. At all events, I tried the stuff and' â she shrugged â âthat's all.
Except that I decided I wasn't going to budge from here until Adam came back.'
Adam took her hand and pressed it gently. They were neither of them demonstrative persons, and there was much that they could afford to leave unsaid.
âWell, Gervase, what's the answer?' Adam demanded.
âThe answer' â Fen was unusually pensive â âwould seem to be that someone is becoming very frightened indeed . . . What time did all this happen?'
âBetween half past four and five.'
âI see.' Fen rose, crossed to the tea-tray, and picked up the cup. âI think I'll try this,' he said, âso as to be sure you're not mistaken.'
âBe careful,' Adam warned, joining him.
âWell, don't buffet me about,' Fen complained, âwhile I'm putting it into my mouth. I don't want to appear prematurely at the judgement seat.'
He sipped apprehensively â and almost immediately fled into the bathroom, whence he reappeared accompanied by a strong smell of disinfectant.
âYes, you were quite right,' he announced. âOf course, it
might
be veratrine, but that's rather rare. Aconite's the obvious answer. We'll have to get the tea tested, though as far as I can remember it takes several days.'
âStas-Otto process,' Elizabeth supplied competently.
âWould the aconite be difficult to get?' inquired Adam, whose ideas on toxicology were primitive to the point of superstition.
âYou go out into the fields and hedgerows,' Fen condescended to explain, âand dig up some monkshood. Then you dry the roots and powder them . . .
Et voilÃ
.' He began to prowl restlessly about the room. âIt would seem,' he said, âthat the motive for this attack lay in your rash remarks about knowing the murderer's identity. And yet' â he stopped pacing abruptly â âand yet a completely unsupported assertion like that oughtn't to have caused such undue alarm.' He shook his head. âYou know, it really doesn't constitute an adequate motive at
all. I'm wondering if there isn't some damning fact you've got hold of without being aware of it . . . No, I don't see that we can get any sort of help from the motive.' He began to walk about again, fidgeting as he went with the handles of drawers and cupboards. âLet me get this clear; a moment before you were attacked you heard someone knocking on the door?'
Elizabeth assented. Fen continued on his orbit.
âI wonder who that was,' he said. âThe probability would be that it was Joan Davis, of course. One assumes that your attacker was alarmed by the knocking and concealed him or herself somewhere while Joan came in and left the note. Then . . . what happens then?'
âHe's about to come out of his hiding-place,' said Adam, âwhen the chambermaid arrives with the tea. After she's gone, Elizabeth shuts the door and returns to the bathroom. Our X creeps from hiding, pops the aconite in the tea, lets himself out, and vanishes.'
âYes, I see,' said Elizabeth. âAnd that means that it certainly can't have been Joan who tried to poison me. On the other hand â'
âOn the other hand,' Fen interposed, âit
could
have been she who tried to strangle you. In that case the knocking may well have been due to the person who wanted to poison . . .'
âYou don't really mean' â Elizabeth was plaintive â âthat you think
two
people were trying to finish me off?'
âI agree,' said Fen, âthat it is rather an
embarras de richesses.
But then' â he became aggrieved â âthis bedroom seems to have been about as populous as Piccadilly tube station, and there is just the possibility â'
Adam interrupted. âI think,' he said, âthat our first reconstruction must be the right one. When all's said and done it's very unlikely that Joan killed Edwin Shorthouse. I admit she disliked him in a general way â who didn't? â but he wasn't
specifically
a nuisance to
her.
And if, as one imagines, Edwin's death and this business this afternoon are connected â'
It was Fen's turn to interrupt. âIf they're connected. I'm not saying they aren't, mind you. But it is, I suppose, possible that Joan Davis had some entirely independent grudge against Elizabeth.'
Adam snorted. âNo, no, that's absurd.'
âShe wasn't, for example, in love with you, Adam?'
âGood God, no.'
âYou mightn't yourself have perceived the fact.'
âNo,' said Elizabeth. âBut
I
certainly should have done. You can really count that out, Professor Fen.'
Fen paused to gaze gloomily out of the window at the uncompromising brick façade of the New Theatre. âDid you happen to notice,' he asked, âif the person who attacked you was wearing gloves?'
âYes,' said Elizabeth promptly. âQuite definitely, yes.'
Fen went to the wardrobe and peered cautiously inside. He then disappeared into it, closing the door behind him. After a few moments he reappeared, awkwardly disentangling himself from Elizabeth's dresses and swearing quietly to himself. He made as if to examine the floor of the wardrobe, and then lost heart and abandoned the attempt. He gazed perfunctorily under the beds.
âA friend of mine,' he said thoughtfully, âhas his chamberpots fitted with musical boxes which come into operation when they're lifted from the floor. It embarrasses his guests greatly . . . As to what we do now' â he scratched his head, by no means improving the natural unruliness of his hair â âI think really that we'd better find out whether any of these comings and goings were observed. And we
must
see Joan Davis. If it was she who knocked on the door, she may well have had a glimpse of anyone who came along here in front of her.'
âShe'll be at the rehearsal by now,' said Adam. âAnd that's where I ought to be, too.'
Fen lit another cigarette; plainly he was worried.
âLook here, Elizabeth,' he said, âuntil this business is cleared up you mustn't be alone â at any time. We'd better all go along to the rehearsal together.'
They began wrapping themselves up against the cold.
âBy the way,' said Elizabeth, âyou never told me what came of your visit to Amersham.'
âNothing to speak of.' Fen acquainted her with the indefinite results of their interviews with Charles Shorthouse and with Wilkes. âIt's simply a question,' he concluded, âof whether, in this respect, Shorthouse is genuinely eccentric, or whether it's just a bluff.'
âHe's eccentric normally,' Adam pointed out.
âYes. But no doubt he's aware of the fact, and he may be trading on it. After all, his tale's so unlikely that
on the face of it
no one but a dolt would have invented it in self-defence . . . Well, are we all ready?'
They locked the door, and in the corridor outside Fen pounced on a passing chambermaid.
âAnd where have you been all afternoon, my girl?' he demanded with Rhadamanthine severity.
âOoh,' said the chambermaid, alarmed. She was young, with popping eyes and straight, straw-coloured hair. âI âaven't done nothing, sir.'
âI didn't ask you whether you'd
done
anything,' said Fen, peeved. âI simply want to know if you were anywhere about here between half past four and five this afternoon.'
âNothing's bin took, âas it, sir?' The girl was open-mouthed with dismay.
âTook?' Fen applied himself laboriously to the elucidation of this remark, and then, finding the effort too much, abruptly abandoned it. âDid you or did you not see anyone go into or come out of room 72 between those times?'
âBecause if it âas, you ought to tell the manager.'
âIf it âas what?' said Fen, disconcerted. âThe girl's a half-wit.'