Swagger (Radioactive Tales of Love) (16 page)

Chapter 30

Roxie

Okay, I go this.
This is what I keep saying to myself as I sit in the little meeting area with Cruz sitting next to me. What I have to do is channel all the anger I’ve been feeling towards Kathy. I need to do things by the book. When was hired on, the agreement stated that she would get a severance if released before the end of the contract. I’m prepared for it. I would pay her. I even have the check.

I would let her go, and then let her know that she isn’t to contact my family ever again. I’d already been to the police station and given them a copy of the restraining order to bar her from the motel, my mother’s rest home and the family home. It also states that she isn’t to be within two hundred feet of me or my mom.

Cruz would serve her with it. He’s my backup and my strength. I owe this man everything.

The meeting door opens and Kathy stops short.

I see her trying to mad dog us, trying to intimidate me. I wasn’t going to let her. “Have a seat…Kathy.”

“I used to be
Aunt
Kathy.”

“Mm-hmm and that was one of my mother’s mistakes…among many. Now, please have a seat, so we can get this taken care of.”

Kathy sits as her eyes narrow on the folder sitting in front of Cruz. “Okay, let’s go. I need to get to the hospital, so I can take care of your mother.”

“That’s where you’re wrong Kathy. We won’t need your services anymore. I have a check with the severance pay that we agreed to when I hired you.”

“What?” Kathy stands quickly and leans in, placing her hands on the small table.

“Have a seat Kathy,” Cruz says with authority.

“I don’t have to listen to you!” She sneers.

“You’ll either sit down or this meeting is ending and according to your contract, if an agreement hasn’t concluded, then you will
not
get paid.” I didn’t back down, nor did I look away from her. She’s always been a bitch to me from the moment I met her and enough was enough. I’m willing to play hard ball with her, if she wants to keep this shit up.

Kathy huffs and sits down hard in her seat.

“Now, as I was saying. You won’t be needed any longer. I have your severance check here for you.” I grab the folder and open it, taking out the check I made out to her. It‘s a large sum but it’s what I agreed to when she’d been hired.

Kathy snatches the check from me and looks at it for a long moment. Her light brown skin looks mottled with red.

I thought she might actually explode.

She then spoke in a voice that’s obviously meant to scare me, “You don’t realize what you’ve done.”

“Meaning what, Kathy?”  I want to hear her say it. I want see if she has the audacity to threaten me in front of Cruz.

“Meaning, that you better keep me hired or else.”

Oh god, did the bitch want to rub me the wrong way!
I needed to keep my calm. It might be best to let
her
go off the handle, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want anything to look back for when we went to court. I open my mouth to say something but Cruz stands up.

He picks up the restraining order and tosses it in front of Kathy.

I stood with him and he places his arm around my shoulder. His strength melts into me giving me a firm foundation.

“It’s time for you to go. You can’t be around this family anymore.”

“I want to know why you’re doing this Roxie? You never had the fucking balls before to do this kind of shit.”

“You want to know why I’m doing this? You really should already have a clue. But since you asked Kathy…I will tell you. You ruined my family by coming into my mother’s life, which put you in mine, and Macy’s life. Then you ruined Macy’s life by taking her innocence. Her innocence that you had no right to have a part of, you’re the reason she thought of herself as damaged.”

Kathy’s already red face…got even redder. “What the hell are you—accusing me—of?” She stutters.

“I’m not just accusing…I’m stating as a fact. You hurt my sister by molesting her. She killed herself because of you.”

“I had nothing to do with Macy doing that! How dare you!” Kathy’s voice keeps getting louder and louder in the small room.

I feel sure others on the outside could hear what is being said. “Take the money and go, Kathy.” I add as much vinegar to my voice as I can. I want to make sure she knows I’m not playing, that I’m serious.

“You’re a fucking lying bitch whore.” Kathy snatches up the money and gives me the vilest look I’ve ever seen. It rivals the ones from my mother by far.

I did the one thing that probably seals my fate with Kathy—I just smile.

She let out a sound, almost like a growl and then left the room.

I sit there for a bit—just soaking in Cruz’s strength as he held me. He was love and comfort all in one very sexy man. “She’s not going to make this easy is she?”

“No baby, it doesn’t look like she is. But we’ll be okay. We’ve done all the steps legally and now all we have to do, is wait for the system to work for us.”

The system.
It seems almost funny to hear
him
say that, with what all the system did to him during his impressionable years, and how they mostly did him wrong. But you see, this one of the things I love about him. Yes…he’s dealt with a lot but he bounced back and I can too. “Thanks for not blowing smoke up my butt.”

He kisses the top of my head and just squeezes me with the bear hug he’s famous for with me. “I’ll be with you every step of the way Roxie, I promise.”

“I know, but thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me for that.”

“Then, I’d be someone without manners.” I giggle as he tickles my ribs.

His expression turns serious. “We’ll get through this. Kathy is just one bump in a sometimes rocky road. We’ve come a long way. I have a feeling there’s nowhere but up for us from here.”

“I’m hoping your right. We are due some good news. But Kathy is fucking bat shit crazy.”

“How about we order some Chinese food and watch some movies tonight? Get your mind off of the extra side of crazy and just relax?”

“Mmm, yes some Ginger Chicken sounds excellent.” I say as we walk out. “Oh—and yeah, my cheese wantons I love so much.”

“I better get more than one order, seeing how you will eat them all up.”

“Hey, to each his own side of wantons! I like them too much to share.” I grin and walk towards the door, picking up the folder as we head out. “Tomorrow, I meet with the director at the home and sign the paperwork to have mom stay there. It’s called Sunnyside Care Center and its right downtown.”

“Sounds like a perfect place for your mom.”

I laugh. “Yeah…with her
sunny
disposition.” Leaving that meeting room, feels like another chapter in my story is closed and—for the better.

“You ready for the trouble that will ensue from it?”

I wear a grin on my face but I feel very serious. “As ready as I’m ever going to be.”

Chapter 31

Roxie

Moving Day two weeks later.

I didn’t realize how much stuff my mom and I garnered in all the years we lived in the house. It seems mind boggling. So, I just focus on packing what the home said I should for my mother. She has a nice room with a view and wouldn’t have to worry about a roommate…at least for now.

Moving day came really soon. Which I’m very grateful for, it means that we were on the right track and all this would soon be history.

Cruz is helping me pack things up in my mother’s room.

I glance over at him.

He’s busy boxing up pictures my mom stored under her bed. He’s an immense help.

I’m so grateful for him. I don’t think I could have done all this packing on my own. I hadn’t wanted to use a moving company. I wanted to take care of all the personal items myself. I figure I’ll use the attic in the house to store everything I want to keep and toss everything that I didn’t. It seems strange not hearing my mom yelling at me and berating my every step.

I finish with her suitcase, making sure to pack her bible on top and turn back to Cruz.

It was time to go pick up my mother from the hospital and take her to the home. So, we drove over. The doctors had sedated her for the trip to the home, because mom became belligerent and hard to control—as we all expected. The medication they gave her made her calm enough to travel.

After I finish all the paperwork, Cruz brought the wheelchair they provided for my mother. We amble out of the hospital to my car.

I become struck by how frail my mother looks sitting in the chair.

She’s lost a lot of weight and her hair looks silver gray while blowing in the slight breeze. Absently, I think of how Kathy would dye my mom’s hair because my mother said she wanted to appear younger. Her normally vibrant eyes are dull as she stares ahead. She’s marked by fate. Least, that’s what it seems like to me. All these years of hate was wearing down on her now.

I open the car door for Cruz.

He gently picks up my mother and puts her in the car.

She still hasn’t made so much as a peep. My mother’s calm is only because of the meds. I really want to get her to the home, so she can get settled, but also because I want to talk to her to get some straight answers.

Soon, we’re heading to the home. The trip is silent. I think we were both caught up in our own thoughts. I still worry about Kathy, though I haven’t let Cruz in on the fact. Something just didn’t sit right with me about her exit from the meeting we had. I’d been advised by my lawyer to go about my daily routine and not worry. The check had been cashed by Kathy, so the lawyer said everything was going as planned.

It looks like such a beautiful day. The sun is shining and though there were clouds, they were the fluffy kind cotton candy dreams are made of. There’s nothing that could mar such a beautiful day. I have my man and we were already making plans to move in together in my home. Just as the business had been left to me from dad, he’d also left the house to me.

Glancing back at my mother, she still sat in her seat with her head down and didn’t speak. This is the mother I wasn’t used to. Ironically, I sort of miss the screaming.
How sad is that?
I became so used to being yelled at—I almost miss it?

Before I realize it, we’re already at Sunnyside and Cruz is wheeling my mother into the building. I take over and he went to get her suitcases as I stop at the desk to speak with the nurse. The place seems a little busy with activity, as it was lunchtime. There were nurses and staff helping the other patrons and I was told to go ahead to the room reserved for my mother.

I push mom down the long hallway, through a maze of older people. Some, just sit quietly and others seem agitated. One older woman and I couldn’t tell how old, sat outside a room in a chair and just shook. I’m struck with the thought of how I was leaving my mother to this fate. A fate of being sat in a wheelchair, outside of your room to just shake.

I hate what my mother had become but at this point, I told myself…I wouldn’t be like her. I would make sure she’s taken care of. It’s my duty as her daughter. I love her and yet—I still hate her. Hate is such a strong word and it’s a word that makes me cringe. It’s the emotion I battled every day when dealing with her. What an ugly word and an even uglier feeling but it is what it is. I’ve overcome all this to be a better person. I would triumph with each passing day over the harm that my mom caused.

I push her into the room and settle her in her chair by the window. I then open the curtain to let the sun in. “Look how beautiful it is outside, mom,” I say to her…not expecting to hear her talk back.

“What—have you done with my Macy?”

I turn slowly to mom.

Her eyes though still a little dull have regained some of their color. She’s holding her hands together and rubbing them slowly. “I said…what have you done with my Macy?”

It’s time to be honest with her. I’m not going to back down like I always have, when she repeats the question. I lean against the windowsill and cross my arms. “Macy is dead mom. She died because of the choices you made.”

“No—what are you talking about?”

“Kathy…mom. You remember her…right? Well, she sexually molested Macy for years and you did nothing about it. So, Macy did the only thing she thought she could do and that was to kill herself.”

“No! You’re lying. Kathy would never hurt my Macy. She loved her as much as I did. She took care of you girls and you’re sitting there telling these lies on her?” My mom starts rocking back and forth in the chair looking as crazy as she always sounded to me.

“I have proof mom. You know that diary Macy always wrote in? She talked about what happened to her and why she had to leave this earth. Now, no matter what you say there’s nothing you can ever tell me that will refute the words written on those pages. Kathy is a thing of the past in my life and in yours. I’m your guardian not her. Deal with it or not. I tried to be what you wanted, tried to live how
you
wanted…but no more. I’m going to be happy with or without you.” I look up from my mother to see Cruz standing in the doorway and I smile.

My mother turns slowly to follow my gaze. “What is
he
doing here?” She points at Cruz.

I’ve been waiting for her to do that. “Oh yeah, remember Cruz mom? He’s the one who makes me happy.”

It seems strange about how it’s even possible, but my mother’s face turns even redder.

Well, she’s just going to have to deal. Cruz is here to stay. I get her suitcases from Cruz, then went to the small dresser and start putting her clothing inside while I still talk to her. This needs to get done before I leave anyway. It doesn’t take me long.

Cruz takes the suitcases and puts them inside the closet.

I thank god for him every moment of the day.
My rock.

It takes my mother forever to even speak. When she finally does, I wasn’t surprised at what she says, “I told you not to mess with that boy.” Her dark eyes look beady and her face is still mottled red.

“Doesn’t matter what you told me. I’m a grown woman now and I don’t have to listen to you or Kathy any longer. So, the way this works mom, is you live out your life here. I’ll pay the bills, then come and visit from time to time. But you will not dictate my life anymore. My father loved me, you turned him away for another woman and you blamed me. In your blame…you were totally blind to what was happening to your other daughter. What’s happening to you now…is karma, and I’m sad to say, it brings me no joy. What goes around comes around…mother.”

My tirade seems to work as my mother turns to stare at me while she sits there quietly.

It seems amazing how much lighter I was feeling. I’ve been holding that all back for years. Lucidity is a wonderful byproduct. “It’s lunch time, they’ll be serving you lunch. Have a good rest of your day.”

My mother makes an odd strangling sound, as Cruz and I leave her there, parked by her bed.