Summer Sunsets (9 page)

The fact she can’t bring
herself to say the A-word isn’t lost on me. Somehow Skye thinks
she’s like Hester Prynne that the mark is there for everyone to
see. That’s the way she thinks it should be, and from what I’ve
read, that’s not uncommon, either—not uncommon but
wrong.

Why, indeed, would I keep
up with the readings? I could lie and tell her it was a topic for a
research paper. Yes, I have used it for that, but that’s not why I
read about it. I could lie, but I’m pretty horrible at it. Skye
would know immediately. I might as well just tell the truth and get
it over with.

“
Well, I started reading
about it because of you and the pills.” I rake my fingers through
my hair, suddenly feeling nervous, wondering if it’s going to make
her mad. The last thing I want is for her to think I’m
meddling.

“
I don’t understand.” She’s
whispering again, and now she looks like she’s about to cry. Her
eyes are brimming with tears, yet another thing I was trying to
avoid. Me and my big mouth.

“
I’m your best friend,
Skye.” I watch her face carefully. “Yeah, I’m a guy and talking
about…it…it might never happen for that reason, especially
considering what a jerk I was right after. I wouldn’t have blamed
you for shutting me out because I deserved it. But I wanted to find
anything I could to help you. I know you’re tight with your mom,
but I didn’t know if you’d be open enough to talk with her about
it.” I lick my lips. “I didn’t want to take a chance and be stupid
when you needed me.”

She shakes her head.
“You’ve never been stupid, Devin. That’s my job.”

I snort and pat her head.
She bats at my hand. “What?” I ask innocently. “I was just seeing
where you bumped your head. I know there has to be a knot around
here somewhere because I’ve been stupid plenty of times, and we
both know it.”

When I say that, I’m
smiling, but deep inside, I’m always thinking back to that
conversation when I pretty much told her she had ruined my life and
I never wanted to see her again. See? Stupid, I’m telling
you.

“
So what does your research
say?” She swallows hard, and I can tell the tension is
back.

“
That for whatever reason
there’s an emotional spike years after the…event.” I don’t say the
word because if she’s not going to use it, I’m definitely not about
to.

“
And?” She suddenly looks up
at me, her eyes wider and more luminous in the gathering
dusk.

“
And you’re not alone. There
are lots of women sharing the same feelings. It’s just that nobody
wants to talk about it unless it’s to fight over whether it’s right
or wrong. It doesn’t seem to matter to anyone what happens after
the choice has been made.”

For a moment, we just sit
in silence, and while it seems everything is calm, I know Skye is
still going over what I’ve said just as surely as I’m going over
her words. Finally, I ask, “Do you trust me, Skye?”

She nods without
hesitation. “You know I do.”

I think,
Okay, here goes
. “So can you trust me
enough to try one thing?”

She blinks a couple of
times before finally nodding. “All right.”

“
Close your
eyes.”

She stiffens, and I can
tell she suddenly wants to refuse. It’s safer that way. “Devin….”
My name sounds like a warning, but I don’t want to hear
it.

“
Please,” I whisper. “Just
this once trust me.” My tone is soft and pleading. I wish I could
drive away the fear in her eyes, but I can’t. Only time might be
able to.

“
Okay.” She finally agrees,
offering the only smile she has right now—a shy, broken thing that
barely remembers joy. I’ll take it. She closes her eyes and
whispers, “What now?” Her hand reaches out, and I can see her
fingers trembling, so I take it and give her fingers a
squeeze.

“
This,” I say and slowly
lean toward her. It seems forever before my lips touch hers, and
it’s a clumsy dance, almost like we’re both back in high school and
unprepared for the places out hearts lead us stumbling
into.

At first contact, I feel
her shudder as my other hand slides to the nape of her neck and
lingers, not meaning to hold her close but just to touch her. The
last thing I want to do is make her feel like she doesn’t have a
way out. A soft breath comes out, and I know at any moment she
could run, but I don’t believe she will. I deepen the kiss,
stroking the skin behind the waterfall of her hair. That’s when I
feel the line of her shoulders tart to melt as she
relaxes.

A moment later, I pull
away, and in the last ebbing of light, when dusk is close to night
and the yard lamps flare on, I see the glitter of tears on her
cheeks, and I’m suddenly ashamed. My hand drops from her
neck.

“
Skye, I’m sorry. I didn’t
mean to hurt you.”

“
You didn’t,” she whispers,
wiping the tears away with the back of one hand before gently
grabbing me.

“
I don’t understand. You’re
crying. Tell me what I did.” My whole body aches with tension, and
I want to break something. How could I have been so
wrong?

“
You kissed me so gently,
Devin—the same way you talk to me, like it matters.” She closes her
eyes, flinching. Her voice is hoarse with emotion and she isn’t
looking me in the eye.

I slowly lift both hands
and set one on each side of her face before setting my forehead
against hers. “Maybe you haven’t felt that before, but you needed
to feel it now to understand just how wrong what Tyler did was.
That’s what it’s supposed to feel like, and you never knew
it.”

She takes both of my hands
in hers. “I don’t know why you just don’t give up on me. I’m a
whole lot more trouble than you bargained for.”

I kiss her forehead. “Nope,
I’d say you’re just the right-sized trouble, and if I’m asking,
then I deserve what I get, don’t I?”

She starts laughing and
collapses against me as the first star twinkles into the
sky.

Chapter Eight

In the next few weeks,
things seem to fall back into the old rhythm when Skye and I were
inseparable. We spend most nights together, either over at her
place or mine, and it works because, in Skye’s mind, it’s not
exactly dating, although I’m trying to work up to that without
freaking her out.

There’s still this
distance, an emotional wall Skye keeps intact, probably to make her
feel secure. I’m kind of hoping if I just keep hanging around,
she’ll let me slip around that wall. No, it may not work—Skye may
never be able to totally trust anyone again—but that doesn’t mean I
won’t try.

I’m sitting at my desk,
looking at my resume, trying to fill in blanks and coming up empty
when my cell rings. Picking it up, I see it’s Skye calling—big
surprise—and I smile before I even flip it open.

“
Hey, you.” I close the
folder, figuring my job strategies can wait another day. I lean
back in my rolling chair.

“
Hey, yourself.” Her voice
is breathy, like she’s been running. “Are you busy?”

“
Not really. How come?” I
glance at the clock by my bed. 10:30. “Do you have some wickedly
deviant plans you want to share?”

“
Painting.”

I smirk as an image of Skye
in paint-spattered overalls comes to mind. “Okay, I give. What are
you painting?”

“
My mom’s house, silly. What
did you think?”

“
No clue.” I shake my head,
knowing I’m in for a long day and an intimate relationship with a
paintbrush, but I don’t care. It’ll be a whole day with Skye, and
that’s definitely enough of a reason to be there.

“
Okay, count me in. I just
need to get changed,” I say. “Then I’ll drive over.”

“
Cool. I’ll see you
then.”

I snap the phone shut and
put on some old jeans and a holey t-shirt that’s seen far-better
days. These were the same clothes I wore the last time I
painted—also with Skye, no less. The fact that there’s so much
paint on them says a lot about how much time we didn’t spend
painting her room when we should’ve.

Smiling, I grab my keys and
head out the door. Mom’s already outside, watering as I head down
the front steps. She never used to care so much about flowers, but
lately she’s taken to landscaping everything.

She sees me heading toward
the Jeep and catches my arm.

“
Hey, not so fast. How’s
Skye?” Her eyes regard me, and I know she’s trying to figure things
out without seeming nosy.

I shrug. “She’s good, Mom.”
I bend and kiss her head, liking how tall I am compared to
her.

“
I mean really, Devin.” She
levels a meaningful glare and I know exactly what she’s thinking.
Mom was the one who ended up helping me pick up the pieces after
Skye came so close to dying. Since for a while Skye refused to let
me visit, I had to find someone to talk to or go out of my head.
Both Skye and I were a mess, and Mom definitely doesn’t want an
encore for either of us.

I smile more broadly. “I
know you’re concerned, but she’s good, Mom—really, really good. I
think the whole college experience helped her sort some stuff
out.”

She nods. “And what about
you? Didn’t you meet anyone at The University of North
Carolina?”

I stare at the daisies
she’s watering. “Nobody who really matters.” I start walking toward
my Jeep. My mom figured that when I went to one university and Skye
to another we would gradually grow apart, but it didn’t happen. I
know Mom wished it had, but whatever is between me and Skye, it has
nothing to do with physical proximity.

“
Be careful,” she calls,
switching her water flow to the nearby mums. I know she isn’t
talking about my driving. I’ve never even had a ticket. Mom’s
always known how I feel about Skye, and I think because of what’s
happened in the past, she’s afraid something could go really wrong,
yet even if it does, I don’t care. I’ll find a way to make things
work because Skye is worth it. She always has been and she always
will be.

Mom watches me pull out,
and even though she hasn’t asked me where I’m going, she doesn’t
have to. We both know.

Five minutes later, I pull
into Skye’s driveway to see Warren dragging out a ladder. While
Skye stirs one of the gallons of paint, Helen leans near one of the
vehicles. Her hair is drawn away from her face in a blue
handkerchief.

I get out, walk up to her,
and touch Helen’s arm to let her know I’m here. As she turns to
face me, I’m kind of unsettled by how pale Helen
appears.

“
Are you feeling
okay?”

She looks at me and gives a
weak smile. “Devin! It’s good to see you again.”

“
Yes, ma’am,” I say,
concerned. “You don’t look like you feel well at all.”

She waves me away. “Oh,
it’s just a little headache. Nothing major. Besides, I’ve been
getting them a lot, and I should know how to function with
them.”

I nod toward the house.
“So, why don’t you go inside? The rest of us can handle
this.”

She leans against the car,
her body seeming to sway unsteadily, and she looks really tired.
“Oh, I couldn’t do that. I’m the one who had the bright idea in the
first place.”

“
It’s okay.” I give her
shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I’ll tell them you don’t feel
well.”

“
Are you sure?” Her smile
kind of dies, and I get a glimpse of how bad she really feels.
“Yes, I’m sure. Now go on before I send Warren to carry you
inside.”

She briefly touches my
hand. “One of these days I just hope Skye realizes how lucky she is
to have you.” That said, she turns and stumbles towards the
house.

Once she’s inside, I amble
to Skye, grinning as she kneels and mixes paint so efficiently.
“Wow! Warren even let you stir the paint. I’m
impressed.”

She gives me her best
go-to-hell look. “Aren’t you here to help, flyboy?”

“
I’ll chase Warren from the
ladder, once the master stirrer is sure she’s done. I figure I’ve
got a hard enough head so if I fall on it, no big deal.”

Without warning, Skye lifts
the stick from the paint and flicks it toward me, flinging grey
globs at me that spatter on my jeans, shirt and face.”

“
Oops. I thought that was
mixed enough. Now I’ll have to do a little more stirring to make
the master painter happy.”

“
Real funny, Skye.” I lift
my hand and try to wipe the paint away as she watches and bursts
out laughing.

“
What’s so funny?” I rub
harder.

“
All you’re doing is
smearing it.” She pulls a rag from her pocket. “Here, let me help.”
She steps toward me and begins trying to wipe the paint
away.

“
You helping? Isn’t that how
I got it all over me in the first place?” Nonetheless, I stand
still and let her try to clean me up. Warren looks down at
us.

“
Hate to break it to you
guys, but the house needs painting, not your clothes.”

I smile at Skye. “Remember
what they say about paybacks.” I step over to where Warren has just
gotten the ladder set up.