Stronger (19 page)

A few nights later, Ty’s temper has cooled enough to let Bryant sit with us at dinner. A guard hovers nearby, keeping an eye on Bryant. He’s made enough progress to let him out of his cell, but not enough to trust him to be alone.

“How are you doing?” I ask, blowing on my hot truff soup.

“Confused.” He touches his ear. “I still can’t get used to these filters.”

“They’re weird at first. I remember,” Ty says. “But they save lives. They might save yours. Again.”

“So, did your sit-down with some of your old classmates help you see the truth behind the Orions?”

Bryant shrugs. “It’s been weird seeing friends I thought were killed alive and well.”

“They were on the list to be executed, but we saved them. Just like we did for you,” Ty says. “You were on the watch list. They were waiting for you to screw up.”

I tap my spoon against my bowl. “What’s it going to take for you to believe us? The videos we have of them ordering Val deaths aren’t enough?”

“Every time I see them, this voice in my head says those could be faked. Wasn’t it hard for you, Ty, turning your back on everything we’ve been taught?”

I put a restraining hand on my brother’s arm. Ty shoves bread into his mouth and chews slowly. “Yeah, I guess it was hard but it didn’t take me as long to accept it as it’s taking you.”

“And when I start to wrap my head around the fact the Orions could be our enemies, I think of the rebellion working with the Musks. They killed Hiram, your brother. How could you be okay with that?”

“They didn’t,” Ty says. “Lexie already told you the truth.”

“She did.” Bryant rubs at his head like it hurts. “Someone said they think the Orions killed my dad. I can’t fathom that.”

Ty and I share a pained look. My Uncle Charlie only confessed that belief to us last night. As horrible as it is, it makes sense. People loved Bryant’s dad.

Ty breaks off a piece of bread, seeming to choose his words carefully. “I don’t know about your dad, but I can promise you’ll get even more proof about everything else soon enough.”

“So you expect me to believe all of our leaders are in on this conspiracy?”

“Yes and no,” Ty says. “We don’t think they are willingly working with the Orions to kill off the Vals. Uncle Charlie thinks they get more compulsion used on them than anyone else. That’s why they always agree with the suggestions for battle that the Orions give.”

Bryant doesn’t respond and we eat in silence for a few seconds.

My brother raises his eyebrows at me. “I hear we have to make you really buff.”

“So, they tell me.”

“Dad also wants me to do more hand-to-hand combat training with you. When you did it with Uncle Charlie, it was just the motions. He thinks you should start again to really get the feel of your new strength. Dad put me in charge of getting you ready.”

I dip my bread into my soup, letting it sop up the broth. “Cool.”

“And I’m leading the mission to the warehouse. I’ll be the one escorting you there.”

“Really? Not dad or Uncle Charlie?”

He buffs his fingernails against his chest and blows on them. “It’s all me.”

I roll my eyes. “I might be a small part of it.”

“A small one,” he agrees with a grin.

“So, I’m part of your squad.” I fight the urge to bounce up and down. “It’s just like we used to pretend when we were kids.”

Ty smiles and ruffles my hair. “Sure is.” He turns to Bryant who is staring into his untouched bowl. “Maybe someday you’ll be fighting with us. Right?”

Bryant’s head snaps up. “What?”

“I said—”

Bryant pushes away from the table. “I don’t care.” He stands up and stalks off awkwardly, the shackles connecting his ankles jingling.

“So, he isn’t taking this well,” I say as Ty and I both stare after him.

Ty frowns. “No, not at all.”

“But does he believe us?”

Ty and I exchange an honest look, one filled with doubt and sorrow.

Ty finally looks away. “I honestly don’t know.”

“Should I go talk to him?”

Ty breaks his bread into shreds. “No, give him some time.”

I manage to finish my meal before springing from my seat and searching out Bryant. I find him in one of the training rooms, his guard between him and the door. Bryant sits on a weight bench near the mirrored wall on one side of the room. He can’t run with the shackles, but he can still work out.

I walk toward him, weaving past the weights and machines spread around the outside of the room, and skirting the thick pad in the center where two Vals practice Judo throws. The yellow glow fluorescent lights flicker above my head.

I lean against one of the steel pillars near him and half-heartedly swing at one of the punching bags. “If you were so sure the Orions loved you, why did you come back with me after you escaped? Why kill your friends to save me?”

Bryant adds a twenty-five pounds weight to the bench bar. “There wasn’t much choice. You took a bullet for me; they were trying to kill me.”

“Can you admit the Orions gave the orders to shoot you?”

He gives a jerky nod. “But after it was over and David was dead, I couldn’t believe it anymore. Even when I heard the voices over the signacoms.” He covers his eyes with his hands. His chest is rising and falling, his breath panting. When he looks up his expression is so broken it makes me wince. “They expected me to kill myself.”

“You probably would have if we hadn’t implanted the filters in your ears. Their voices are, um, almost like magic. People almost always do what they say.”

Bryant rubs the back of his head with his fingers. “Do you remember the way the Vals fought to obey the orders they were given? It’s like the soldiers didn’t have their own free will. The man who wouldn’t shoot me, the one David killed, he was my bunkmate my first year at school.”

“I do remember.” I move over to a speed bag and hit it once, watching it rebound. “Vividly.”

“I can’t forget it.” He adds a weight to the other side of the bar. “We’re hailed for being these strong warriors, but we’re weak. Where was my strength when they made me act against my will? I couldn’t even save myself. How could I save others?”

I take a few more swings, finding my rhythm with the speed bag. “There are different kinds of strength and bravery. You’re very strong, but everyone has a weakness.”

He laughs without humor. “I didn’t know I had one until that day. I kept trying to make excuses, but I’m starting to see everything in a new way. It’s terrifying.”

I don’t say anything, afraid to interrupt what feels like his confession.

“Why do you keep saving me?” Bryant asks.

I mess up the rhythm of my swing and miss the bag. “Because you saved Ty from drowning my doll when I was four. Save a girl’s doll and she’ll kill a wild beast, pull you from a box of poisonous gas, and take a bullet in the back for you. Really, all guys should take notes. We love our dolls.”

He smiles, but it never reaches his eyes. “Even after what I did to you, you still saved me. I don’t understand it.”

I stop the bag. “You’ve been brainwashed your whole life. You made decisions based off that.”

“How do you know that wasn’t me?”

“Because I knew you before you were a warrior. And while you were, you often did things they didn’t approve of. That’s why they targeted you.”

He doesn’t say anything. “I’ve been having nightmares. The ones you talked about.”

“And?”

“There’s this guilt eating away at me for the stuff I’ve done.”

“I’m told all of the Vals go through that.”

“I hate it. It’s like I don’t know who I am anymore.” He takes a shaky breath. “Let’s say you’re right. And even though I want to deny it, I know you are. What if I detest the person I am under all of their compulsion.”

“You won’t.”

He raises his eyebrow. “What makes you so sure?”

I sit beside him and nudge him with my shoulder. “You forget I knew you before they dug their claws into you.”

He smiles and for a brief second it flares in his eyes before vanishing.

His forehead wrinkles as he studies me. “I can’t reconcile the little girl who I gave piggy back rides to with you. This—” He waves his hand up and down me.

“This? Amazing skilled fighter, who keeps saving your worthless hide?”

He laughs. “Yeah.”

“I guess we don’t really know each other.” I stick out my hand for him to shake. “I’m Lexie.”

He takes my hand in a firm grip. “Bryant.” His hand lingers in mine for a few seconds longer than needed. “I remember you, when I was going through the withdrawal. Your voice, your presence. It got me through it. Thank you, Lexie, for that and for saving my life.”

He’s staring at me, in a way he hasn’t before and it makes me feel like I’m running a fever. “You’re welcome.”

He grabs my hand again when I stand. The guard starts forward but backs off when I shake my head.

“Lexie, I’ll never be able to make up for your being held prisoner, but I promise to spend the rest of my life trying.”

There’s so much remorse in his eyes that I almost can’t take it. “Bryant…” I say.

“Don’t. No platitudes or words can fix this. Just know I’m sorry and I wish I could take it back.” Our eyes lock. “But I
will
find some way to make it up to you.”

The next day I’m in the gym with Ty, and he’s putting me through the most grueling workout of my life. He’s been showing me wrestling moves and no matter how hard I try I end up on my back, wheezing for breath. Sweat burns my eyes and my legs feel weaker than newly fallen snowflakes.

The door opens and we both turn to see Bryant walk in without shackles. My dad is beside him.

Ty jumps to his feet. “Why is he free?”

“I think he’s ready,” Dad says.

Ty stands between Bryant and me. “You really think so?”

“I do.”

Ty gets a drink from his water bottle, never taking his eyes of Bryant. “You’ve decided we’re telling the truth?”

“I’ve known it for a while but I didn’t want to admit it. You didn’t have proof and I couldn’t believe it but…”

My brother stills. “But what?”

“I can’t forget watching my friends struggle to maintain their free will over the Orions’ orders.” Bryant rests his head against the wall behind him. “The order to kill me.”

My brother’s expression softens. “It’s gruesome, isn’t it? To see someone under compulsion.”

Bryant shudders. “Yeah. I would be dead if your sister hadn’t saved me. David was going to shoot me. I never recognized the influence they had over us before. How can I now?”

“The filters help. And you’ve finally worked their influence out of your system. You getting nightmares?”

Bryant nods. “Thank you for saving me, for not giving up on me.” His shoulders sag. “I’m sorry, for trying to escape. It was just so jarring. And even now I want you to be wrong.”

“We’re not,” Ty says.

Bryant catches my gaze. “I know. Or at least I think I do. I just don’t want it to be true.”

My dad frowns. “We usually don’t pull someone out like we did you, but Ty refused to leave you behind. You’re like family to us, Bryant. We don’t leave family behind.”

Bryant leans against the huge mirror. “How could you even care about my fate after I turned Lexie in?”

“It wasn’t easy, but we knew you thought you were doing the right thing.” My dad sits on one of the weight benches. “You also didn’t know who she was. If not for my brother, we would have turned her over to the Orions years ago. We’ve all been fooled.”

He clears his throat. “I’m willing to help, to be part of any mission. Not just for me, but for my dad too.”

“I want to trust you, but considering how susceptible you still were to their voices and how long it’s taken you to accept the truth, I’m not sure that’s the best idea,” my dad says. “You’re trying to redefine your life and struggling with your new reality. Sending you out would put the mission—the whole rebellion—at risk.”

Bryant doesn’t disagree, but his jaw clenches.

Ty wipes sweat from his forehead. “I want to trust you. I do. But it’s going to take me some time.”

Bryant’s eyes dart to me. “I understand.”

My dad stands and gives Bryant a fatherly pat on the back. “We have your first assignment.”

Bryant stands taller. “What do you need me to do?”

“For now we need people to train Lexie. She has to be a better fighter. Faster and stronger. Work with her on the drills you did at the academy.” Dad grins. “Only harder.”

Bryant nods. “I can help with that if you trust me to.”

Ty looks like he swallowed glass. “Dad, do you really think this is a good idea?”

My dad’s answer is a level stare.

Ty throws his hands up in the air. “Fine. But I’m watching you, Bryant.” He shakes his head. “I need a minute. Later.”

Ty stalks out of the room.

“He’s going to need some time,” my dad says.

“I understand.” Bryant puts his hand in his back pocket. “Are you okay working with me?”

I give him a reassuring smile. “It’s fine.”