Stronger (16 page)

“I can’t breathe.” My voice is barely a whisper and my vision is darkening around the edges. I see my dad shouting to someone, but the sound is muted, incomprehensible. I’m falling, and my brother catches me, running after my father to another room. Ty sets me on a table and my dad is above me holding the largest syringe I’ve ever seen. My vision narrows to a point and the last thing I see before it all goes black is my father slamming the syringe into my heart. I tighten, my back arching painfully and then there’s nothing.

The steady beep of a machine is the first thing I notice when I wake. My eyes open and stare at the dots on the ceiling. For a moment, I’m back in the lab for another round of bone breaking. The machine’s beeping rhythm speeds up, matching my elevated heart rate.

“She’s up,” my dad says sitting on the edge of my bed. He interlocks our hands. “It’s all right. You’re safe.” I glance around the room, letting my body relax. I’m in a hospital room of some kind. My mom sits beside me, guiding my head to her shoulder.

She smiles but has tears in her eyes. “I’ve wanted to hold you like this for twelve years. Seeing you in that lab, in pain and not being able to comfort you…” she trails off and wipes at her eyes.

I reach up and softly touch her cheek.

“Am I okay? Will I… make it?”

My dad brushes a strand of hair out of my face. “You’ll make it.” He touches the sensor on my wrist. “The exposure seems to have been minimal. There’s probably some damage to your lungs, and it shouldn’t get any worse, but not even the strongest Vals heal from that kind of injury. You passed out because fluid was building up in your lungs, but we were able to drain it. I’m sorry I didn’t recognize the symptoms earlier. But you’re okay now. And we’re together.”

I nod and lean my head back with a smile. “How’s Bryant? Did he breathe it in too?”

“No, but he’s going through withdrawal.”

“Withdrawal? From what?”

“The Orions’ voices.”

My eyebrows raise. “You go through withdrawal from that?”

“Yeah, our brains release all kinds of endorphins when the Orions speak to us. And people can grow dependent on it. Bryant’s is one of the worst cases I’ve seen. He’s been worked over by them a lot.”

“Yeah, I saw how Starburst manipulated him the night the grizzle attacked. He thinks he loves her.” I tell them what I saw that night on the mountain.

“We knew they were dating. That seems to be Starburst’s role, using romantic relationships to keep the best Vals in line if they start asking too many questions. Eventually the Orions kill them anyway, but with Starburst’s influence they can take full advantage of the warrior’s popularity before they do.” My dad sits back on his hands. “Even without his name on the watch list we would have removed him. Her dating him was a warning sign.”

“How do you feel?” my mom asks. “It’d be good for you to get up and move if you’re up to it.”

My muscles feel tight and sore, but otherwise I feel fine. “Sounds good.”

My mom hands me a pile of clean clothes and helps me stand. I arch my back, stretching out my muscles and soon feel all I really need is a shower. Mom points me to the bathroom where I can wash off the grime. My hair is still wet around my shoulders when I head back to the infirmary.

A guard is stationed in front of the private room they’re keeping Bryant in. I stand outside, watching him through the window.

He’s in bed, restrained and shaking. His eyes are closed, and when they flicker open, all I see are the whites. My mom comes up beside me and places her hand on my shoulder.

“He slips in and out of consciousness,” my mom says. “When he’s awake, he begs to be put back under.”

“The withdrawals are that bad?”

“The worst I’ve seen. The Orions have been working on him since birth. I remember when I went through mine.” My mom shudders. “I still have nightmares about it.”

“Will he get better?”

“We inserted the filters in his ears, those help.”

Bryant moans and twitches. For all of his strength, he looks so small and helpless now. “Is there anything I can do to help him?”

My mom puts her arm around my shoulder. “When I was hurting, people read to me. I could hear them sometimes, and just knowing I wasn’t alone helped.” She takes a tablet off the table by the guard’s chair. “Want to give it a try?”

“Of course.”

Her hand blocks me before I enter the room. “It might not be pretty. When he comes to, he’s angry and sick. Next to the bed, there’s a bucket and some wash—”

I put my hand on her arm. “I can handle it.”

Her eyes search my face before she nods and drops her arm to let me pass. I settle down in the empty chair beside Bryant’s bed. I’m close enough now to see the perspiration soaking his hair and dotting his flushed face.

I reach out my hand and smooth it along his brow. “It’s going to be okay, Bryant. You’re not alone.”

He sighs and turns his head toward me, murmuring a single name, “Starburst.”

Hearing her name is like a hot poker to the heart. “Not Starburst, Bryant, it’s Lexie.”

“Need Starburst; it hurts.”

Yeah, it does. After everything I’ve already been through it shouldn’t, but it does. “It’s Lexie, Bryant. I’ll stay with you.”

I click on the tablet and scroll through until I find a book to read aloud. I’m about halfway through the first chapter and the girl just met the love interest when his eyes pop open. The chains on his restraints rattle and he lurches to the side, his chest heaving. I barely have time to get the bucket to his mouth before he empties his stomach. He sits back with a groan. I pour him some water and perch on the edge of his bed.

“Go away,” he says, glaring at me through feverish eyes. I ignore him and gently slide my hand under his neck, lifting his head and bringing a cup of water to his mouth. He drinks greedily and curses when I pull it back.

“Small sips or you’ll make yourself sick again.”

The heat of his skin alarms me and I use the small tub of wet washcloths on the nightstand to dab at his forehead, the back of his neck, and under his arms. He watches me as I run the material up and down his arms, his blinks growing longer and slower until he falls back asleep.

We repeat the process two more times. When he doesn’t get sick from the water, I dare to drizzle some broth down his throat.

“He wouldn’t do this for you,” Ty says, startling me from my reading. My brother is standing in the doorway, his arms folded across his chest.

“I know.”

“Then why are you doing it?” Ty asks. “Why do you keep saving his life?”

I flush, not wanting to admit my ongoing childhood crush. “I just do. Why did you insist we bring him with us?”

Ty crosses the room and sits at the foot of Bryant’s bed, watching him sleep. “Because he’s been my best friend my whole life. I can’t forgive him for what he did to you… but I can’t blame him either.”

“He was doing what they compelled him to do.”

“Every time I see him I remember you being held captive, but I still see my friend.”

I put the tablet on the nightstand. “And I see the boy who saved my doll from you.”

Ty leans back on his hands. “I remember that. He got his first scar doing it.”

My hands absently trace the scar above his eye. Ty frowns, watching my fingers. I pull them back into my lap and fight not to blush.

“Mom said I should watch Bryant. That you could use a break.”

I stand and stretch. “Sounds good.” I lean over and fluff Bryant’s pillow. “Goodnight, Bryant. I’ll see you in the morning.”

His eyes flutter open, unfocused. “Don’t go.”

“It’s Ty’s shift. I’ll see you in the morning.”

His fingers encircle my wrist. “Please, stay.” Then his body falls slack, eyes closed.

There’s an uncomfortable silence. I’m staring at Bryant, my heart in my throat. I can feel Ty’s eyes on me. I meet his gaze. “What?”

“Well, that was surprising,” Ty says.

I pull my pink jacket closer around me and force a laugh. “He must think I’m Starburst.”

Ty slides to the edge of the bed, the green sheets wrinkling underneath him. “Maybe. You better go. Mom’s waiting for you.”

Happiness pulses through me. “She is?”

Ty considers me. “You really don’t know, do you?”

“Know what?”

“How much we missed you.”

I sink back down into the chair. Ty takes my hands in his. “Did you really?”

He gives me a slow nod. “So much.”

Emotion clogs my throat. I stare at the cement floor, the divots and cracks in it swim behind my tears. “I missed you too.”

“I understand why Charlie did it, but we suffered a lot.”

“I used to watch the clips of you guys on the newsfeed. No articles ever mentioned me. You looked so happy, I thought you’d all forgotten me.”

Ty pulls me into a bone-crushing hug. “Never. I missed my little shadow when you were gone. And I won’t let anyone hurt you again.”

“I love you, Ty.”

“Love you too, Lex.” He swallows hard and clears his throat. “You better go.”

I give him another embrace before hurrying to meet my parents. Who are waiting for
me
.

Something shakes me awake, pulling me from a nightmare of crawling from beneath the corpses of my co-workers, only to have Carter waiting to break all of my bones. I swallow a scream as I open my eyes. My arms are moving, striking at the intruder. The nightmare fades away enough for me to see my mom sitting beside me and I barely manage to miss clocking her in the face.

My mom is kneeling on the ground beside my bed. She takes my hand that’s still curled in a fist in front of her face. “It’s okay, baby girl, it’s just me.”

It takes a few seconds to recognize the tiny room with the hard bed as my own, connected to my parents’ quarters in the rebellion headquarters. The door that leads to their rooms is open. Lights from their living area highlight the plain brown walls and cement floor in here.

My dad is standing behind her, close to the other door in my room, the one that leads into the main hallway of the residence area. Seeing them still makes my heart feel brighter than the sun, replacing the horror of the nightmare with joy.

“Wake up,” she says again.

“What’s going on?” I ask rubbing at my eyes.

“It’s Bryant,” my mom says. My dad pulls her to her feet, her back to his chest.

“Bryant?” I bring my hand to my chest, clutching the blanket. “Did something happen to him? Did he die?”

My dad interlocks his fingers on mom’s stomach. “We think he needs you.”

I slide out of my warm bed, and don’t even feel the cold on my bare feet as I head toward the infirmary.

My dad is following behind me, explaining Bryant’s condition. “He woke up about half an hour ago and is working himself up so high, his blood pressure is in the stroke levels. We need you to calm him down.”

Bryant’s shouts for Starburst echo down the hallway. I halt in the doorway to his room, the scene in front of me bringing me to complete stop. The nightstand is toppled over; the tablet I’d left there is smashed against the wall.

Bryant is awake and raging, struggling against his restraints. It smells like blood, which drips from Bryant’s wrists, but he doesn’t seem to notice the metal digging into his flesh. The clanking of the chains is almost deafening and the shrill alarm and blinking lights of the monitors attached to Bryant add to the drama of the scene. The veins in his forehead and neck stand out.

“How long has he been this way?” I ask my dad.

“About fifteen minutes.”

I gulp and enter the room, my hands up in the universal sign of surrender.

“Lexie, stay away from him,” Ty says, snagging my waist. “He’s dangerous right now. He doesn’t even recognize me.”

“I have to try, Ty. I’ll be okay,” I say. “He’s restrained”

Ty shakes his head. “I don’t like it. At all.”

“I can do this.”

Ty steps back. “If it even looks like he’s going to hurt you, I’m stepping in.”

“Perfectly fine.”

“Bryant,” I say. I stand at the foot of the bed. Bryant’s head snaps toward me, his eyes narrowing. “You need to calm down. You’re going to hurt yourself.”

He’s breathing like he’s been running sprints. His pupils are dilated, his lips pulled back in a snarl. He looks feral, like a wild animal caged and about to lash out at anything that comes close to him.

“Take a deep breath.” I take a large, loud exaggerated breath. “Breathe with me.”

He shakes his chains, the metallic sound reverberating around the small room. “Let me go. I need Starburst.” He doesn’t even seem to hear me. I need to move closer, to make him feel safe. Inch by inch so as not to startle him, I move toward the head of the bed until I’m by his side. I’m close enough he can touch me.

“Lexie,” Ty says in a strained voice.

I sit down next to Bryant’s shoulders and clasp his face in my hands, resting my forehead against his. His nostrils flare, his eyes locked in on me. “Bryant, take a deep breath. You need to calm down.”

I do my exaggerated breathing again. Bryant watches a few times and then his breathing copies mine. The monitors attached to him stop their shrill beep. Something clatters to the ground behind us and Bryant whips his head around, the monitors sounding again.

“No,” I say and force Bryant to me look at me again. “Stay with me, Bryant. We’re just going to keep breathing.”

When his heart rate and blood pressure stabilize I sit back. He grasps my hand, interlocking our fingers. My mom snakes up to his other side and injects him with something. His eyes go wide then slip shut. I try to stand, but my hand is wrapped in his.

My mom checks Bryant’s numbers and the monitors while my dad and Ty stand on the opposite side of Bryant’s bed.

“A little help?” I ask pointing to my hand.

“It might be better if you stay.” My dad scrubs at his face with his hand. “You seem to keep him calm and if he has another episode like that it could be hard on him.”

“Alright, then. I’ll just stay here.” I yawn. “I’m tired.”

“I’ll be right back,” Ty says.

Ty leaves and returns a few minutes later and unfolds a cot next to the bed. I uncurl on it and fall asleep still holding Bryant’s hand.

When I wake up my hand is free. Bryant is sleep, his chest rising and falling steadily. I take the opportunity to use the small bathroom and slip into the clothes I found at the foot of my bed. Using my finger, I brush my teeth. Splashing some water on my face helps wake me up.

Feeling more alert I check on Bryant, his blonde hair peeking out from the sheets that cover his face. Wait. Blonde hair? Bryant doesn’t have blonde hair. I rush to the bed and pull back the covers and find a different person lying in Bryant’s bed.

“What happened?” I demand, shaking him awake.

His eyes open slowly and he puts his hand to his forehead with a moan. “He said he was going to be sick, so I brought him the bucket. When I got too close, he got me in a choke hold and I passed out.”

I spin around and head toward the door ignoring his plea to release him from his chains.

Somehow I know Bryant’s searching for a way out, so he can go back to his precious Starburst. The tunnels of this place are like a maze and there are dozens of exits, each one guarded by a well-trained Val. I start checking exits. When I see an unconscious guard by the one at the back, I curse. I bend over the warrior and shake him awake.

“Hey, are you okay?”

He sits up with a groan, rubbing his head. “Yeah, I think so.” He tilts his head back and stares at me. “What happened?”

“I don’t know. I just found you on the ground.”

He stands up and gingerly touches a small trail of dried blood at his temple. “Want me to get you some ice? Your head’s got to hurt.”

“A little, but I’m fine.” He walks to the door and bends down to examine the floor. In a layer of fine white powder, there are footprints showing that someone walked out. “It doesn’t look like anyone came in, but somebody left.”

Great. I know who that someone is. I turn to the guard. “I’ll check it out.” He nods and leans against the wall, holding a hand to his forehead. I tighten the knife sheath strapped to my thigh and run out into the cold night, not exactly sure what I’m planning to do. I’m already a few hundred yards away when I realize I’m going after one of the toughest cadets by myself. What am I thinking? Nothing! There isn’t time to turn back but I need to call for help. I should report to my dad and brother where I’m going, let them know Bryant escaped. Using the wristband my dad gave me—we had to ditch my old one so they couldn’t track me—I try to connect with my dad.

“Dad, Bryant’s missing. I think he’s trying to go back. I’m going after him.”

The communicator crackles with static in reply. I try to message Ty and get the same response. I consider going back for them, but know wasting even a few minutes could be a mistake.

I get my first good look at the aboveground parts of resistance headquarters, and realize it’s an old amusement park. The giant skeletal remains of roller coasters and a huge Ferris wheel loom over me. Using the North Star and my memory of the map my dad showed me earlier, I take off running in the direction of the campus. In his haste to escape, Bryant didn’t bother covering his trail well. I see occasional footprints Bryant left in the light dusting of snow past a series of short, branching streets, each one made up of buildings from different eras and locales, apparently imitating famous cities that existed before the war. Faded murals of mermaids and sunny beaches—without the snow and ice—decorate the walls.

I know Bryant is still suffering his withdrawal and healing from the injuries I gave him in the glass box, so he might be weaker than normal, giving me a better chance to catch up to him and subdue him. I hope I can find him before he lands himself into too much trouble. I really don’t want to have to kill him. If I’m being honest with myself I’m not sure I could.

The sun is rising above the mountain ranges in the east when I enter the remains of a war-torn city. Its early rays peak out between and through the tall abandoned buildings. The old skyscrapers are missing most of their glass, those that haven’t been reduced to rubble. Craters in the blacktop show the damage of Musk bombs, some big enough to hide a hoverbus. It’s a ghost city and even it’s covering of snow can’t hide the devastation from the long-ago wars.

I’m navigating my way through an intersection crowded with ancient cars, all rusted in place, when I hear the thud of boots approaching and the high-pitched beep of mag-rifles charging up. I duck behind one of the dented vehicles, but someone shouts for me to put my hands in the air, the words echoing off the steel and glass structures around me. My heart leaps to my throat and my insides shake like an earthquake. I glance around at the crumbling edifices rising around me like cliffs, and find I’m alone in the deserted street. They aren’t talking to me!

“Don’t shoot! I’m unarmed.” A male voice cries out. Bryant. “I’ve escaped the rebels.”

I move to the corner of a building and peer down the cross street through the gaps in the stone facade. Bryant is surrounded by three Vals. All are pointing guns at him. He drops to his knees, his hands in the air. The guns aimed at him don’t lower. Beads of sweat run down Bryant’s forehead. “I’m not the enemy. I have information that can help.”

One of the officers talks into his wristband. “We have Bryant. He says he has information about the rebels.”

“Kill him,” is the decisive reply. It isn’t some Val leader giving the order either; it’s an Orion. Silvercloud.

The solider flinches. “But ma’am, he’s been in contact with the—”

“And is contagious. Kill him. Now!”

The soldier’s face is turning purple and his hand shakes as he holds the gun.

“If your commanding officer won’t obey my command, kill him.” The order comes from a different Val’s wristband. His eyes cloud over and he steps up to the man still struggling to kill Bryant and shoots him. The soldier’s blood splatters across Bryant’s horrified face.

The shooter lets out a single sob, his face contorted in pain. “Done.”

“Now kill the prisoner,” the voice says. “Or you’re the next to die!”

The gun swings around and points at Bryant. As the gun recycles, Bryant stands, holding his hands out in front of him. “David, we’re friends. You know me. You know I’d never betray you guys.”

“I don’t want—” David says, the vein at his temple bulging. “I have to—” His face is turning red. “I’m sorry.” His hand is shaking as his finger moves to press the trigger.

I spring out from behind the corner, my feet already running before they hit the ground. I hear the gun go off as I plow into Bryant, knocking him onto his back just as another bullet is fired. He cushions my fall with a loud grunt.

“It’s her. We have the alien!” One of the soldiers is screaming into his wristband.

“We need her alive,” the Orion says. “Kill Bryant. Bring her in. Bryant,” the Orion continues. “Let them kill you.”

Bryant’s head jerks back, pressing further into the snow.

“No!” I slap him across the face. “Don’t let them control you!”

My back feels like it’s on fire. I reach around to feel for an injury and my fingers come away bloody. I’ve been shot!

“Son of a Musk!” I yell, warm blood oozing down my back. Bryant shoves me off him, kicking up as he flips to his feet. I stand up, arms at the ready for the Val approaching me.

“Where are you?” the Orion demands. Bryant slams his fist into David’s jaw, then brings his elbow down hard on his wrist, making David drop the gun. Bryant tackles him just as the other Val rushes toward me.

I grab my knife and slash at the Val’s outstretched arm. He dodges back and then dives toward me, gripping my wrist in one hand and wrapping his other arm around my waist, his fleshy fingers digging into my wound. I scream as my legs buckle.

I’m on my back fumbling with my knife; the Val is on top of me forcing my hand to turn, twisting my knife until it’s pressing against my chest. The tip pierces my skin when I try to breathe in.

“Stop fighting. They want you alive.”

I’d rather die now than go back. I buck against the man restraining me, the knife tearing my flesh, going deeper. Then suddenly he’s gone, lifted off of me and tossed against an ancient automobile. He bounces off the vehicle and lands on the ground, unmoving. Bryant stands above me. Behind him, David’s still form lies on the road, a crimson stain beneath his head. Bryant extends his hand and I hesitate for a second before taking it.