Authors: Molly McAdams
Whoa, what?
How the hell did she get
anything
I’d said as not wanting her?
I grabbed the side of the curtain and hoped for her sake she’d put the damn towel on as I slid the curtain across the bar. “I didn’t say I don’t want you. I said I don’t deserve you.”
“That’s practically the same thing. We both know how you are, Chase. You screw every female you come in contact with. I don’t want to be just another girl to someone, and when it comes to Brandon, I won’t be. If you can convince me right now that I have a reason to not be with him, then start talking. Otherwise, you and your confusing words need to stop.”
She really thought she was just another girl to me? Sure, I told everyone that, but she had to know that wasn’t true. And it’s not like I’d told
her
that—I told her the opposite! I’d never felt anything like this for anyone, and she thought she was just another girl for me? I thought about all the girls she’d seen me with since meeting her and wanted to curse myself for ever trying to push her away; I’d done this to myself. Until I showed her differently, she’d always think she didn’t matter to me. And other than wanting her to be with me, I didn’t have a legitimate thing to say against Brandon. He was the best guy I knew, the only guy I’d trust her with. “As long as he is what you want, I’ll stop bothering you.”
I thought about the way he’d come after me that morning because I’d bruised her. Yeah, he was in just as deep as I was. I let my fingers trail across the biggest bruise on her arm and wanted to kill myself. I leaned over the tub and kissed that bruise, moved up to kiss the smaller one on her shoulder, then across to kiss the identical one on her right shoulder. If only that could make them go away. “I’m so sorry, Harper,” I whispered, just before kissing the corner of her mouth. She’d never know how sorry I was for everything that I’d done to her in just two weeks of knowing her. “Get my number from Bree. I have to go in to work tonight, but if anything happens, call me, and I’ll be there.”
Before I could do anything else, like take her in my arms and never let her leave, I made myself turn and walk out of the room. I was already running late getting to the shop—not like anyone would care—but I needed to get there and clear my mind of my princess. I snorted as I cranked the engine of my truck. Yeah, like that was possible.
“H
EY, MY MAN!
Wasn’t sure if we’d be expecting you or not after our convo last night!”
I laughed and slapped Brian on the back as I went to my station. “Yeah, well, you got me tonight, so stop your bitching.”
“I’m so serious, bro, you missed some crazy hotties last night, and all they wanted was a piece of Chase.”
“Yeah—about that. I’m pretty sure I’m done with other women.”
His back straightened, and he spun around in his chair to face me, “Uh, ’scuse me?”
“You ever have a problem with someone else wanting your wife? Not just wanting her, because, Marissa’s hot, and we all know that. But I mean someone
really
wanting her, and her wanting him? Before you guys got married or anything like that?”
“Swear, bro, you should have started with that, because I thought you were going to start batting for the other team.”
I narrowed my eyes at him and went back to setting up my station.
“All right, fine, uh, not really. I mean guys have gone after her, chicks, too, but it’s always been me and Marissa . . . err, well, except for that one time.”
“Yeah”—I huffed out a laugh and repeated his words—“except for that one time. But that was you, Bri, not her.”
“Whatever. You know I’m making up for that shit. Why’d you ask anyway?”
Sighing loudly, I put a couple sketchpads back down and looked over to see the lobby empty, “There’s this girl—”
“
Oh, no way!
Chase Grayson is whipped!”
“Do you want to hear this or not?”
He nodded as he chuckled and grabbed his phone. “I gotta tell Riss. Keep talking.”
“Bastard,” I whispered, and shook my head as I dragged my chair closer to his station. “I don’t know what it is about her; I can’t stop thinking about her, and I’m telling you I don’t even care about other girls anymore. At first, I just wanted a go at her because she was a challenge, but that didn’t even last two hours before all I could think about was protecting her and keeping her with me.”
“Oh, shit, you love her.”
I looked up at Brian and flinched back, “No way. I mean, she’s different. So different. You know I don’t get like this over women. And there are things about her that drive me crazy in the best ways possible, yeah, but I don’t love her.”
“Yeah, you do. I can see it all over your face when you talk about her. Man, you’re not whipped, you are straight up in love with this chick.”
Love her? Hell no. I just met her
.
There are
things she
does
that I
love, but I
don’t
love
her. “Nah, Brian you’re taking this too far.”
“Whatever, I’m not gonna argue with you. So what’s the problem, then? You asked if guys went after Marissa. Someone going after your girl?”
“Well, she’s not
my
girl. She’s too good for me, she deserves someone that’s the exact opposite of me. So, I’ve been trying to make her realize that, too. But now, too late, I’m realizing I don’t want her anywhere except with me. And now she and Brandon are dating, I guess. You remember Brandon?”
“Oh man”—he nodded—“that dude’s like your brother.”
“I know. This is ridiculous, I don’t know what to do. Brandon’s the best guy for her, I know that, but I want her. And I’m constantly pushing her away and pulling her toward me; I’m pretty sure I’m giving us both whiplash.”
“Look, Brandon’s great and all, but you’re being too hard on yourself. I wouldn’t agree with you that he’s the best guy for her. I think any guy that loves her the way you do is the best guy for her.” I started to tell him I wasn’t in love with her, but he cut me off. “You are, and you’ll realize it one day.”
“Whatever, so what would you do if you were me? I
know
I should let her be with him, but I don’t know if I can.”
“I’m just going to compare her to Riss because that’s exactly how I think of her, so if someone was trying to take my girl from me—even if she weren’t my girl yet—I’d fight for her. No way I’d let Marissa slip away, and you shouldn’t let this chick slip away. What’s her name?”
“Harper. Princess. Whatever fits at the moment.” Brian raised an eyebrow at me, and I shrugged. “When I first met her, the title fit. Now it just pisses her off, but it still kinda fits her.”
“That’s weird. I’ll stick with Harper.”
I laughed. “Shut up, man. You’d like her. She’s hot, God she’s so damn sexy, and she has
no
idea. She’s everything I never wanted in a girl and everything I want from her. She’s snarky and at the same time sweet as hell; she’s probably shorter than Bree, and she’s fierce, but she looks like a pissed-off little kitten when she is.” Brian’s chuckles cut me off, and I blinked up to look at him. “What?”
“
Chase Grayson is whipped and in love!
” he shouted loud enough to be heard throughout the tattoo parlor, and I glared at him. “Oh, man. Screw texting Riss about this. I gotta call her and tell her; you know she’s gonna give you hell. And she’s gonna want to meet her, so I know you and Brandon got some bro-mance going on, but don’t let her go, man.”
I thought about my princess, I’d already screwed things up bad enough, but I was done with it. I was done with everything else but her. She didn’t want me to drink? Then I wouldn’t. All that happened when I did was mistakes with other girls, and no other girl mattered. Not anymore. I didn’t know how to go about fixing what I’d already fucked up, but I’d change everything from here on out, I needed her. “I won’t.”
I
DIDN’T S
EE
Harper again until Monday, and I was starting to wonder if Brian was right. At the risk of sounding supercheesy and sappy, my chest literally swelled, and my heart took off as I watched her walk across the courtyard with my sister. She looked perfect. Everything about her. I didn’t need to be here ’til later, but I knew she was here and had hoped to catch a glimpse of her. I don’t know what I was going to say to her, but I needed to talk to her. As soon as I stepped away from Drew and Zach, my steps faltered as Brandon walked up and swung her up into his arms to kiss her. My hands fisted, and I had to turn away, so I wouldn’t watch them. I needed to fight for her smart; running up to them and punching him would definitely not win me any points.
“Zach, give me some paper and a pen.”
“What? Why?”
“Just give me some, fast.”
I ground my jaw as I forced myself not to look back over at them. I could hear Brandon talking, so I knew they were still there, I just really didn’t want to see her in his arms again. As soon as Zach tore out a sheet of paper, I ripped the bottom off and scrawled a note on it before handing his pen back.
“Take care of my girl, Bree,” I heard Brandon call from behind me, and I swear I growled.
Motherfucker. My girl.
“Chase, you all right?” Zach asked, and he was looking at me like I was crazy. I felt like it.
“Yep. Catch you guys later.” I turned and had to look for a second before finding Bree and Harper walking away. I caught up to them quickly and realized I still didn’t have a reason to talk to them. At the last second, I threw an arm around Bree’s shoulder, and asked. “What’s up, sis?”
“Uh, nothing. I thought you didn’t have classes ’til later?”
“Had some things I had to take care of earlier, didn’t feel like going home.” I had placed myself between her and my princess, so it wasn’t hard for me to press the paper telling Harper she looked beautiful into her hand. As soon as I felt her fingers curl around it, I let my hand trail all the way up to her elbow and smiled when I heard her breath catch.
“You going to family day this weekend?”
“Bree, you’re asking me? I was the one that actually showed yesterday.”
“Don’t blame me; Harper wouldn’t get out of bed with Brandon.”
I was going to kill Brandon. I just had to find him first. “You ladies have fun, I’ll see you later.” I hugged Bree quickly and nudged my princess before making myself go back to my truck instead of finding Brandon. If punching him wouldn’t win me points, killing him definitely wouldn’t.
I
T WAS RIDICULOUS,
but I’d avoided being at my house as much as possible ever since I’d come home from work Monday night to find Harper and Brandon making their way into his room. Now, I was pretty much only here when I knew Brandon would be in class. But holy hell, if I could walk out of my room to see this every time I was home? I’d never leave. Harper was standing there in the tiniest bikini known to man, her body shaking slightly; I guessed it had something to do with the water that still clung to her skin. I couldn’t stop myself from slowly, so freakin’ slowly, taking in her practically naked body.
“Damn, Princess. You look”—God, I really needed to adjust myself— “wow.”
“I was uh, just coming to get more towels.”
I kept my eyes on her even though she’d covered her chest with her arms as I opened the closet next to me and pulled out a stack of towels. I dropped all but the top one and wrapped it around her shoulders. “How are you?” I brushed my fingers across her cheek, then down her neck, and watched as her eyes fluttered shut.
“Huh?”
I kept my eyes on her completely relaxed face until I ducked my head under her jaw and kissed her throat, keeping my lips against her skin as I asked, “That good, huh?”
She pushed me back after a few seconds, and I couldn’t help but smile at her fierce expression, which was becoming one of my favorites. “Why do you keep doing this to me?”
“What do you mean?” I tried to pull her into my arms, but she stepped back and, with the hand that wasn’t gripping the towel to her chest, pointed at one of my arms.
“This! You can’t keep doing this. I’m with Brandon now; you have to stop. No more notes, no more touches, no more putting your lips on me. This isn’t fair to me. Do you have any idea how crazy you’re making me?”
That Brandon shit had started to piss me off, but as soon as she asked that last question, I was smiling again. “Really now?”
“Chase, I’m serious. This has to stop.”
Hell. No.
“Give me one good reason why I should.”
“I told you, I’m with Brandon now.”
“I said a good reason, Princess.”
“That’s a perfectly good reason! And it’s the only one you’re going to get.”
I watched as she bent down to pick up the towels and knew I needed to just tell her how I felt. I’d spent too much time confusing both of us—I needed to lay it all out there. “Harper.”
She squeezed her eyes shut as she spoke to me, and I wanted to beg her to open them so I could look at her stormy eyes. “No Chase, please just—just don’t. I really like Brandon. Besides, you have plenty of girls who are fine with being treated like shit by you. I’m not one of them. Go find another brainless bimbo to screw and get out of your system.”
Holy shit; that hurts.
I recoiled like she’d slapped me and didn’t even try to stop her when she turned and walked back outside. She still didn’t get it; she still thought this was just a game for me.
“Hey, there you are,” Brad called, and I tore my eyes from the back door and over to him. “Whoa, are you all right?”
I nodded and looked back at the door.
“Um, okay. Well, before you run off again, I’m gonna grill some burgers in a bit. So why don’t you stay until you gotta go in to work? I don’t know why you’ve been gone so much, but whatever it is, we all miss having you around here. C’mon, we’re all gonna be outside swimming and hanging out until later.”
A shriek that was distinctly Harper sounded from the backyard, and I took off for the door in time to watch her get thrown in the pool.
“They’re just throwing the girls in the pool, calm down.”
“I know, I just . . .” Just what? Didn’t want anyone touching her? Freaked the hell out when I heard her just then?
“Oh shit, man. Please don’t tell me—”
“Don’t worry about it, Brad. And yeah, I’ll stay.”
He sighed but didn’t say anything else; I just shrugged out of my shirt and pulled a chair up to where the towels I’d just given Harper were spread out. I had to grip the arms of the chair when Zach threw Harper into the pool again not thirty minutes later, but other than that, just sat around with everyone and tried not to make it obvious I couldn’t keep my eyes off her. Bree and I were talking about this new prick she had with her and how she wanted to use my room
again
tonight, when Brandon ran up behind Harper and picked her up. I almost laughed when she kicked at him, but then he kissed her, and the laugh died.
He asked something too low for me to hear, but I definitely heard her response. “Not at all, I’m yours for the next three days.” I watched as he walked them into the house and caught sight of Brad watching me and shaking his head slightly before looking back to the grill.
Bree was still asking for my room as I stood up quickly. “Whatever, Bree, I’ll leave it unlocked.”
I stalked back toward the house, and Brad stopped me with a hand to my chest, “Bro, you should really think about what this could do to you and Brandon before you go startin’ shit.”
I shrugged off his hand and gave him a warning glare. “Maybe you should shut the fuck up and mind your own business.”
Before he could say anything else I went into my room and pulled out my sketchpad for a while before getting in the shower and getting ready for work. I hopped in my truck and wasn’t even out of the neighborhood before I saw her. I had to do a double take, but I’d know that girl anywhere. I rolled down my window and slowed as I came up next to her and studied her hunched-over posture. “Harper?”
She didn’t look up and didn’t stop walking. What the hell was she doing? Why was she out here?
I threw my truck in park and jumped out before quickly rounding the front and going right to her. “Harper what are you—are you crying? What’s wrong?”
She sniffed and wiped at her face roughly as she tried to walk around me. “Please leave me alone.”
Hell no!
“What happened?”
Who the hell made her cry? Because I sure as shit didn’t; and why is she alone?
I grabbed her arms gently, making sure that I would not be able to bruise her again, and hunched down low to try to look in her eyes; she just turned her head away. My hands started to flex, and I forced them to relax.
Brandon, who the hell else? That’s it, I’m
going to kill him for real this time.
“Nothing happened, Chase, so just let me go.”
“Like hell. You’re crying and walking through a dark neighborhood. Talk to me.”
“Why are you even out here?”
I wanted to ask her the same thing. “I’m going in to work. Now tell me what he did.”
“Don’t act like you don’t know. You tried to warn me; you knew he would do this.” Her phone rang, and after ignoring the call, she shoved it back in her pocket.
“Princess, I promise you I have no idea what you’re talking about, but I’ll kill him for hurting you. Please tell me what happened.” I let go of her arms, only to wrap one around her, bringing her closer to me, and with the other I tilted her chin up so I could look into her heartbroken gray eyes.
Oh my God, Harper, what did he do to you?
A short cry escaped her, and her body relaxed into me as she cried softly against my chest.
“You’re okay, Princess, I’ve got you. Tell me what happened, and I swear I’ll do everything I can to make this better for you.” I ran my now-free hand up and down her back and tightened my hold on her when her phone rang again.
“Can you take me to the dorms, please?”
“You sure you want to go there?”
She nodded against my chest, and I knew Brian was right. I was in love with her. I wanted her in my arms forever, I wanted to take care of her when she was sick, hold her when she was upset, and kiss her senseless during the happy times. I took a deep breath and reluctantly let her go. It was not the time to push her into anything. She was upset over another guy, and I didn’t want to be the rebound.
“ ’Kay, get in the truck, Princess.” I helped her into the passenger seat and saw her body go rigid when her phone rang again as I got into the driver’s seat. “Is that him calling again?”
“Yep.”
“Are you going to answer it this time?”
“Nope.”
I scooted across the seat, cupped her face in my hands, and wiped away the last of her tears. “Tell me what happened.”
Before she could say anything her phone rang again, and she answered it this time. “What, Brandon?”
Oh hell.
I was glad not to be on the receiving end of that. No more cute fierce looks; she looked like she could kill someone. I went back to my side and started driving toward the dorms.
“Seriously? You’re really going to play that game with me?—I left.” She started silently crying again and shook her head quickly. “Please stop calling me, Brandon.”—“Why don’t you ask Amanda? I’m sure she’d be more than happy to
show
you why I left.” Not two seconds later, she ended the call and held the power button until she could turn her phone off.
Amanda? Who the hell
is
Amanda?
I stayed silent for a few minutes before reaching over and grabbing her hand. Thank God she didn’t remove hers. “Who’s Amanda?”
“Apparently she’s some girl he’s sleeping with. Bree and I saw her on Monday with him and a group of guys.”
Uh, I’d have known if Brandon were cheating on Harper. Even with avoiding the house. “Why do you think he’s cheating on you?”
“I was getting back in my suit and his phone kept going off! I wasn’t going to look, but I swear it went off like fifty times—okay not really fifty, but a few. It just seemed like a lot—whatever! So, anyway, I just leaned over to see who they were from, and there was a picture of this chick’s shaved vaj!” My eyebrows shot up, but I didn’t interrupt her. “So I opened his texts, and there was another picture of her boobs and her face, and she was saying things like, ‘
I can’t wait ’til tomorrow
’ and ‘
I can’t wait to feel your lips all over me again
’ I feel so stupid.”
“You shouldn’t.”
Oh my God, what am I doing?
This is the perfect opportunity to get her away from Brandon, but if she was this upset over the possibility of his cheating, I knew I wouldn’t be able to be more than what I already was for her. She needed to get over Brandon on her own another way, then come to me; but not from something she
thought
was happening. “I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but I think you’re wrong, Harper.”
“Excuse me? I know what I saw, Chase!”
I pulled up outside her dorm and put the truck in park before turning to look at her, “I’m not saying that, but he wouldn’t do that to you. That’s not the kind of guy he is, but even if he were, he would have told one of us. We tend to brag about girls we’re with. And as much as I hate him for it, all he does is talk about you.”
“Do you realize how all over the place you are? A week ago, you were telling me not to go on a date with him, and now you’re defending him?”
Yeah, I realized it; and yeah, I was driving myself just as crazy as I was driving her. “I’m not doing it for his benefit, trust me. I don’t want you with him, that hasn’t changed; I just hate seeing you hurt like this.”
She looked at me curiously for a few moments before removing her hand and reaching for the door handle. “Thanks for the ride, Chase.”
“Are you going to be okay? Do you want me to stay with you?”
“I’ll be fine, I’m tougher than you think. Go to work; I’ll see you around.”