Stay (2 page)

“What?”

“She looks at me like I broke her heart,” Lucas mumbled, slinging himself into the saddle. “It wasn’t me but it feels like it was. And for the life of me I can’t figure out why.” He glanced at the sheriff. “Maybe you oughta hit me over the head and see what happens when I come to.”

“The thought has occurred to me,” said Cass.

Lucas gathered his reins. “I’ll stay, for now. But next time you come to have a little talk, you’d better be prepared to tell me about this other Wolf fellow and what the hell he did to her, to you, and to every other damn soul on this ranch.”

He spun his horse around and loped off down the ridge, leaving the sheriff and his riddles behind.

Syd didn’t feel so hot. Her stomach bounced around as if someone was using it as a butter churn. Up and down, up and down. She wished she’d thought to bring some crackers to work.

For the first three months of her pregnancy, she’d barely even known she was pregnant. Well, tried not to know was more like it. Now the baby was all she thought about, the baby and the way Wolf avoided her.

Between the hospital, the demands of the ranch and the sleepless nights, Syd was as exhausted as she’d ever been. Oh, and the baby, Wolf’s baby. She was desperate to talk to him about the baby, but she couldn’t. Any mention of his contribution to this pregnancy and he’d pack up and leave…yesterday.

Syd was surprised he hadn’t hit the road already.

Whenever she was at the hospital, she wanted to be back at the ranch. She prayed she’d look into Wolf’s eyes and just once he’d look at her the way he used to, just once she’d see the old Wolf looking back.

On the other hand, whenever she was at the ranch she wanted to be back at the hospital because he made it clear how uncomfortable he felt around her.

She was a fool for hoping. Sure, Lucas was Wolf, she knew it, Cass knew it; for god’s sake even the ranch hands knew it. Everyone knew it but the man himself. He didn’t have a clue what he’d been. He had no idea how much he meant to her, no memory of what he’d sacrificed for her and for Cass.

She could tell by the very cant of his head whenever he was around her. Lucas Jennings thought she was crazy as a loon. Every single time he gave her that veiled look, another piece of her heart died.

He slept alone in the small bunkhouse. Each night she had to stop herself from doing what she wanted to do with all her heart, walk across the dirt road, knock on his door and beg him to let her share his bed, beg him for crumbs, charity.

“Dr. Blake?”

Syd looked up from the computer. “Yes?”

“The patient in room one is asking for more pain medication.”

“The hip fracture? Dr. Benoit took that case. Did he go on break?”

The nurse shook her head. “He’s out back waiting for the EMTs. The car accident, remember?”

“Oh, right, sorry. I’ll go talk to the patient. Did the x-ray tech get here yet?”

“Been here and gone.”

“Good, thanks. I’ll take care of this.”

Syd rose from her chair only to find herself on the floor, two nurses and Dr. Benoit bending over her. She tried to sit up, but Dr. Benoit pushed her head back down.

“Stay down,” he said. “Your blood pressure is low and I don’t want you passing out again.”

“I don’t faint,” Syd said.

“Uh, well, you just did, Dr. Blake. Have you eaten today?”

Syd tried to remember. Hadn’t she just been thinking about crackers? “No, I guess not.”

“Well you’re dehydrated and undernourished. Judging by the persistent bags under your eyes you aren’t sleeping.” Dr. Benoit turned to one of the nurses. “Let’s get Dr. Blake into a bed, get a liter of normal saline into her and call Dr. Evans.”

“Yes, doctor.”

“No, wait.” Syd tried to protest. “That’s not necessary. I’m fine.”

“Syd, that’s enough out of you. I’ve indulged you in your pity party for too long. You may not care what happens to you, but someone has to care about this baby, and I guess that’ll be me. Bob Evans dropped by here last week to tell me you’d skipped another appointment. You are way too smart to be so stupid.”

Syd felt her cheeks burn. “I’m not stupid, I’m…” Her eyes filled with tears.

She watched Dr. Benoit grit his teeth, as if biting back a response. “All right, up we go.”

Dr. Benoit and two nurses lifted her onto a gurney and transferred her to a bed in one of the cubicles. Before she could utter another word she felt a prick in her left wrist and the cool flow of IV fluids in her vein. Syd decided to close her eyes and just go with it.

Ben was right. She’d been fucking up big time. Wolf’s baby deserved better.

“Syd?”

At the touch of a hand on hers, she opened her eyes. “Hi, Dr. Evans.”

“Hello, Sydney.”

“I’m sorry to be so much trouble.”

“You’re no trouble at all.” The older man patted her arm. “That’s the trouble. You skip your appointments, ignore my advice. You have to take care of yourself, Syd. You want a healthy baby.”

“I know, I do, I’m sorry. I just can’t seem to, well, to focus on much these days.”

Dr. Evans patted her arm again. “Stop apologizing. Neither of your jobs is easy and now you’re going to be a mother. You need some help, Syd. A lot of people care about you. Let us help you.”

“Not the one…” Syd stopped in mid-sentence.

“Not the what?”

She shook her head. “Nothing, it’s nothing. As long as I’m a captive audience, you want to get the blood work I missed last week?”

“The phlebotomist is on the other side of the curtain. We’ll talk after I get the results back. I suspect you’re working too hard and eating too little or you’re anemic. Knowing you it’s probably all three.”

Syd forced the corners of her mouth up in what she hoped passed for a smile. “You’re probably right.”

Dr. Evans left the cubicle and the lab tech took his place at the bedside. Syd stared at the wall, ignoring the prick of the needle in her arm.

It would be easier if Wolf hadn’t come back. How cruel of the fates or the gods or the devil to send him here, tear him away from me, and then bring him back without any memory of how much I love him‌—‌how much we love each other.

Every day is torture. I want him, but he doesn’t want me and I can’t tell him a damn thing about what happened. He’d never stay. He’d just run faster and he’d go so much farther. What the hell am I supposed to do?

She closed her eyes again.

Maybe I should do us both a favor and fire him.

Stay

on of a bitch. Doesn’t anyone answer the phone around here?” Lucas yelled the words out the open barn door even though he knew damn well the two hands, Ryan and Chuck, were off in the pastures.

“Hang on, little one.” Lucas used his fingers to break the suction and pull the bottle away from the heifer’s mouth. He swept her into his arms and deposited her in a clean stall. She’d just been born this morning. Feeding twins was tough enough for a cow, feeding triplets was near impossible. This tiny heifer wouldn’t survive unless they bottle-fed her or found her another mother.

Another mother this late in the season was unlikely. All but a handful of the cows had already calved.

“Coming.” Lucas clomped across the barn to the tack room. He grabbed the receiver on the old wall phone. “Triple Creek Ranch… No, Sydney’s not… Can you repeat that?” The words doubled him over, as if someone had punched him in the gut. “I’m on my way.”

He grabbed his keys from a nearby shelf and jogged to his pickup. He hoisted himself inside, eyes forward, scanning for a dust trail from the tractor. Ryan and Chuck were on the other side of the ridge, a mile or so from the barn. Lucas headed in their direction. Someone needed to finish feeding the heifer and make sure she was bedded down safe and sound.

If Sydney lost her baby, he’d never forgive himself.

Why? It’s not your baby. She’s not your woman
.

Lucas skidded around a bend on the gravel road. He forced himself to slow down, bringing the truck back under control.

He couldn’t answer his own question.

It wasn’t his kid. Sydney Blake wasn’t his woman, yet his heart pounded so hard he thought it might burst out of his chest. He felt like the biggest jerk in the world. If anything happened to her… If anything happened to Sydney and that baby it was on him. He didn’t know how, he didn’t know why, but he knew it was the truth.

How the hell did she get into my head, she and the other Wolf, the golden giant? It makes no sense. Not a damn bit of sense.

Lucas parked his truck, headed toward the entrance to the Emergency Room, and slammed into a fist.

“You son of a bitch.”

“What the hell?” Lucas tried to get up off the cement.

“Stay down, you bastard, or I’ll hit you again.”

Lucas sat back and stared up at the man who’d just decked him, a white-haired man wearing scrubs.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” He rubbed his jaw. “What did I ever do to you?”

“Nothing. You didn’t do anything to me, asshole. That punch was for Sydney Blake. I’m her boss. What kind of scumbag are you? You make a woman fall in love with him and get her pregnant, but when you recover your memory you pretend you don’t know her. Why the hell are you sticking around here? What kind of con are you running?”

What on earth?
“I’m not running any con and I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.” Fists clenched, Lucas rose to his feet.

The man’s eyes went to his hands. “You plan on using those fists?”

Lucas took a second to think about that. “I don’t hit doctors.”

“Lucky for you because the way I feel right now I’d like the opportunity to beat some sense into your thick skull. Listen up, Wolf, or whatever your name is.”

“My name’s Lucas Jennings.”

“Good for you. I don’t care. What I do care about is Sydney Blake. She’s pregnant with your child. That’s a fact whether you remember or not, whether you’re willing to admit it or not.” The man scowled at him. “Now either you take responsibility or stay the hell away from her because I’ll be damned if I’m going to watch her pine away over some ass who doesn’t give a shit about her or his own baby.”

Lucas rubbed a hand over his jaw once more. He tried hard to keep his voice steady. “I don’t remember. I don’t know what everyone is talking about. I’ve never been near her, never touched her. The first time I laid eyes on Sydney Blake was a month ago.”