Starbound (24 page)

I gave her a dry look. “Funny.” I couldn’t believe I was agreeing to this harebrained idea.

She walked backwards toward the bed, her hand in mine, pulling me along the way. I dragged my feet out of habit. When she crawled into the spacious bed, I got in beside her, the mattress squeaking under our combined weight. My eyes never left hers. Burrowing her head into the crock of my arm, she nestled against me.

It was torture. And I loved every second.

Her little pink and white heart boxers were distracting me, showing off her golden legs. I tried to keep my mind off them by losing my fingers in her hair. It didn’t work. Silky strands fell onto my shoulder, spilling over my chest.

She rubbed her cheek against mine. “Why is this so hard? Why does it have to be so wrong to want you?” she whispered, her voice so soft I almost wasn’t sure I’d heard her correctly.

I dropped my hands to my sides, knowing if touched her any longer, I wouldn’t be able to stop. My hands fisted until my knuckles throbbed. She asked the same questions I asked myself a million times. My throat felt like it was going to collapse, because I knew she was right. I forced a smile, trying to sound lighthearted. “In a few years, some other guy will sweep you off your feet. You won’t even remember me.” The words felt like sandpaper in my mouth.

She tilted her face up, resting her chin on my chest, eyes bright. “What bullcrap. You know that’s a lie. I know it’s a lie. That is not how this works. Besides, I don’t want any of them to be my first, Seth. I want you.”

Holy Virgin Mary.

This was definitely a dangerous topic. We were supposed to be keeping things simple, not complicated them more. A tremor rippled down my body, my resolve weakening. “Kats, are you telling me that you and Matt never…”

She shook her head, wisps of curls falling on her face. “No. We didn’t. Why is it so hard to believe that I’m a virgin?” she barked back, her eyes narrowing, and really, I couldn’t blame her. I, of all people, shouldn’t have assumed.

Shit
.

Of course I dug myself deeper trying to recover from my blunder. “I don’t know. It’s just that you are so…”

“So what?” she snapped.

“Christ, Kats. Are you going to make me spell it out for you? Beautiful. There I said it. You know you’re gorgeous. And I just figured since you and Matt went out for so long…” I couldn’t fathom anyone not wanting her the way I wanted her.

Right now.

She was killing me.

The only thought that kept me from kissing her just then was that her parents were down the hall. She snuggled back into my arms, and I pulled her close, loving that I was surrounded by everything that was Kat. I was positive that neither of us would sleep a wink. Surprisingly, that wasn’t the case.

Katia

Seth thought I was beautiful
. It was the last thought I had before I dozed off, engulfed in his warm embrace. Maybe I already knew he thought I was beautiful, but I’d never heard it from
him
. It was so unbelievably different coming from Seth’s mouth. And dear God, I wanted to hear him say it again. And again.

In my dream, that was exactly what he did. It wasn’t the first fantasy I had involving Seth. Trust me, I’d had plenty, but it was the most vivid one to date. In my dreams I could be whoever I wanted, even the sexy, cool girl who wanted to seduce the jaw-dropping Seth.

A warm hand stole across my belly, landing just under my breast. In feather touches, the pad of his thumb rubbed in circles. I turned into the body beside me and brushed my lips over his neck just below the ear. “Seth,” I murmured.

“Hmm,” he mumbled.

“Kiss me.” I was ready for him to go where no man had gone before. In my dreams, obviously.

“Kats,” he said in a half groan, half moan, burying his face in my hair.

My hands framed his cheeks, feeling the tiny stubbles. “I love you, Seth, and I know you love me, too.”

I waited for his response. My blood was singing, my body aching.

“Kat...” He growled, a deep, sensual growl that had my blood tingling.

I played dirty, brushing up against him. Dark forest green eyes pinned me, and I could see his resolve diminishing. He entwined our fingers, and from the look in his eyes, wild goblins couldn’t have stopped us. I lifted his wrist to my lips and placed a gentle kiss over the five stars, flicking my tongue over his racing pulse.

He sucked in a breath.

Letting go of my fingers, his hands gripped my waist. There was a glowing heat in his eyes as we gazed at each other, spellbound. Couldn’t he feel how much I needed him, needed this? I wanted him to kiss me more than I wanted to live.

And my wish was granted. Well, the kissing part.

My head dipped, our lips meeting in a deep, drugging kiss. Nothing tame and just what I wanted. A low sound rumbled in the back of his throat, and his fingers tightened at my waist, pulling our bodies together. The blood in my veins pumped hot at just one of his kisses.

God above, please don’t let him stop. I swear I will kill him.

My fingers curled into his dark hair, loving the texture and the sensation of his body. We had somehow switched positions so I was underneath him. There was desperation as we clung to one another, but there was also tenderness. He sipped on my lower lip, and I purred at the bottom of my throat.

I was afraid that if we stopped kissing even for a second, I would wake up, and that would suck. Our lips locked together, and I moved, needing to feel the lines of his hard body against the softness of mine. Wrapping a slender leg around his waist, my gut twisted with desire. Having Seth roam from my mouth to my neck to my shoulder and every place in between bewitched me.

Sneaking my fingers under his shirt, I pushed the material up and over his head. My heart pounded in my ears as I gawked at his chest. He looked like he had been dipped in sunshine. Lines of muscle were etched down the sides of his stomach, trailed by a dusting of dark curls that disappeared behind his boxers. I traced that line with a fingertip, watching the muscles quiver. Somewhere in my mind I knew that I was testing the boundaries. Did I dare? Nope. This was a fantasy and all’s fair in love and dreams.

He rolled, taking me with him.

Oh hell yes.

I felt his fingers grasp the hem of my shirt, and I straddled him, lifting my arms in the air. He discarded my shirt next to his on the floor, leaving me in my red bra. Green eyes blazed into mine as his hands tenderly swept down my arms to my sides and settled at my hips. But they didn’t linger for long. He fumbled with my waistline, making my breath catch each time he brushed my bare skin. Somehow I wiggled out of my boxer shorts, kicking them off the bed.

Sweet baby Jesus
.
This was really happening.

To keep things fair, I unsnapped his jeans and tugged down the zipper. He took over, quickly shedding himself of his jeans. My eyes were drawn to the line of hair that disappeared into a V beneath his boxers. I traced the ripples of muscle, watching them jump under my touch. He sucked in a breath, and I gave him a sexy half grin.

His eyes deepened at the sight of my dimples. Power. It was immensely empowering knowing that I could affect him so. And then I was the one being swept away as he kissed me again, the heat from our bare skin sparking between us. Each touch, each reaction brought on a wave of new feelings—intense. I ran my tongue along the bottom of his lip, feeling him shudder.

He blew my mind in ways I couldn’t even imagine. There was no time to think—only feel. The mattress groaned under our weight as we rolled, limbs intertwined, but we were so lost in each other that we wouldn’t have heard an ambulance if it had driven through my room.

“I need to kiss you,” he murmured.

“You are,” I whispered against his lips.

He broke away. “No, I need to kiss your body.”

Yes. Yes. Oh. God. Yes.
“Oh.” Um…did I even need to think about that? “What are you waiting for?” I managed to say, and I don’t even know how I was able to articulate the words.

He chuckled against my skin, and I sunk my fingers into his dark hair. With the first touch of his soft lips to my stomach I nearly jumped off the bed. His tongue teased the charm dangling at my belly button. I bit my lip as he licked a circle around the hoop, and I gripped his shoulders.

Good thing this was a fantasy and consequences weren’t an issue, because nature had a way of pushing us together. In dreams we no longer denied that force—it would be unnatural if we had. And what Seth and I were doing was anything but unnatural.

Through the magick we created together, our remaining articles of clothes slipped off. Lying skin to skin felt like a sensory overload. He was gentle, sweet, and whispered all the right words. It was me that was unable to bite my tongue. I was the one who spoke too soon. I was the one who wasn’t strong enough.

Go figure.

I was the emotional, reckless one.

Raining a path of kisses along his jaw, I thought I might have murmured that I loved him between kisses—multiple times, but I couldn’t be sure. And before I even realized what I was saying, words were tumbling from my mouth. “Freely I give, what’s mine to give, if our souls were meant to be. Our paths merged by flesh, heart, soul, spirit, and magick. I bind thee.” Then I captured his lips with mine, sealing my vow with all the love pouring from me.

That’s what it would be like to utter the starsoul to Seth. My head fell back as I felt the buzzing of magick tingle through my veins—his and mine. Everything about me was alight, and my senses were going haywire. There was this building inside me, begging and begging for release. Accompanying it were tendrils of pure, silky, vibrant magick.

In that moment, it was enthralling—hypnotic—and so was the act of being with him. His body fit mine in a way that I knew not another guy ever would. And yeah, the initial pain was there, but he made me forget about it, distracted me with searing, smoldering kisses, and the things he could do with his fingers made me blush. We came together not only in flesh, love, and spirit but in magick as well. Being connected with someone intimately was a joy so great it was euphoric. Sharing magick at the same time was…erotic. Alluring. Seductive.

Afterwards, I lay glowing in his arms. I swore my skin shone brighter than a glowworm on a hot summer night. Stretching out beside him, I felt like a cat after a long nap. My limbs were relaxed and my body tired, but in a really good way.

My head rested on his chest, drawing mindless doodles on his stomach. Slowly my heart rate returned to normal, but that was where normal stopped. We weren’t connected anymore, but he was still a piece of me. I could feel a mishmash of emotions whirling. There was something different about me, but I couldn’t pinpoint what, not when I was still basking in the radiance of having just been with Seth. My mind was too clouded from the afterglow.

And I didn’t want anything to tarnish this dream. I wanted to capture it in a mason jar and release it whenever I needed a reminder that life could be beautiful, breathtaking, and enticing. The whole night seemed so impossible that I wanted to pinch myself.

“God, this dream is too good to be true.” I turned to my side, eyes closed.

“Tell me about it,” Seth mumbled.

What?
That was strange. Did Seth just admit that he was dreaming as well?

My eyes popped open.

“Shit,” Seth cursed, holding my wrist in the air. His body stiffened.

And I realized that none of it had been a dream. We had just burned up the sheets. We had done the freaky-deaky with my parents down the hall. I had said…

I caught a glimpse of the five black stars on the inside of my wrist. The room suddenly spun in dizzy rainbows as I realized what I had just done.

I had activated the curse.

Chapter 24

Seth

I stopped breathing. The black tiny stars on the inside of her wrist started to swirl together as my vision blurred. I thought I might black out or have a mental breakdown. My eyes clashed with Kat’s, and I watched her face go from flushed to ghostly white. My stomach plummeted as I realized what that humming was inside my blood. It was Kat—more specifically Kat’s magick. A string of F-bombs went off in my head. At least I thought they were inside my head.

“I’m sorry, Seth. Oh God, I am so sorry. I thought I was dreaming. I didn’t know what I was doing.” Tears rolled down her cheeks, streaking her face.

The horror of what we had done shattered my heart into a gazillion, jagged fragments. What did I say? I wanted to offer her comfort, but at the same time I didn’t know how. My arms were wrapped around her, and I held her tight. Fat tears pricked her eyes. “Hey, shh. It’s going to be okay.” I wiped the tears from her cheeks, wishing more than anything that I could see her dimples instead of her tears. Nothing was ever going to be okay again.

“Not. True. Seth.” She sobbed.

Something inside me snapped. I couldn’t stare down into those tear-drenched eyes another second. Everything was so intense. Her grief. Her fear. My dread. My anger. It wasn’t my first rodeo, but
it
had been Kat’s, and I was livid that the curse had taken that from her, too. That it had screwed up her first time. Darkened it. The damn curse was going to take everything from us, and that was bullshit of epic proportions.

I jumped out of bed, noticing the soft rays of sunlight just beginning to rise, and threw on my jeans. This was probably the jerkiest move I’d ever made, but I had to get out of her room. Out of her house. Grabbing my wadded shirt from the floor, I put my arms through the sleeves. “I need some air,” I mumbled, slipping the cotton material over my head.

She sat up on the bed, gaping at me with gut-stabbing sad eyes and an open mouth. I never felt so helpless in my entire life. What did she expect me to do? Cuddle her? I couldn’t—not now. Not with the turbulent storm churning inside me. I was hanging on by a thread.