Spice (16 page)

For a moment her heart hammered in her throat, the fear of falling overriding everything else. Then she breathed deep, realizing the ropes held her, supported her. Her eyes slid closed as she surrendered, relaxing completely, her head lolling, hair falling into her face. She felt secure in her immobilization, cradled and comforted even though her position and the placement of her bonds left her completely open and vulnerable.

She had no idea how long she'd hung there, moments, minutes, mental hours. Suddenly the silence became too much. She opened her eyes but couldn't see anything with her hair falling into her face, obscuring her vision, the darkness of the room burned the color of fire by the fading sunset and low candlelight.

Yet as much as she enjoyed the ropes, it was the process of being bound by him, of going under because of him, of being connected to him that she truly craved. Suspended there, blinded by her hair, deaf to everything but the pounding of her heart, she couldn't feel him, couldn't sense him in the silence. A feeling of abandonment flared to life inside her, burning away the contentment. He wouldn't leave her. Not like this. He wouldn't. She trusted him.

Panic boiled up her throat, threatening a scream. Just as her muscles tensed with the urge to escape, he touched her. The curve of his hand on her cheek, brushing her hair back from her eyes, made her sob in relief. She went limp again, sagging in her bonds, craving his touch, his nearness, his heat. Craving everything he could give her.

“Do you remember your words, Nadia?” he asked, moving so that she could see him. He'd removed his clothes and stood before her beautifully, heartbreakingly, gloriously naked, his cock so hard and ready it pointed up like a beacon.

She blinked back to full awareness. Staring up into the depths of his eyes, she felt as if he saw straight through her, through the old pain and fear and bullshit to the vulnerable soul beneath. “Yes . . . sir.”

“Do you need to say them?”

His touch soothed her fragile nerves. “No, sir. Having you touch me makes it better.”

He used both hands to touch her, his fingers stroking over every inch of exposed skin, teasing her, cupping her, filling her. Each touch brought him back to her, her to him, reconnecting until his presence filled her senses. She sighed as contentment returned again.

“Do you like this, Nadia?” he asked after another long silence, his nimble fingers plucking on her already-hardened nipples. “Do you like being bound like this, suspended like this?”

“Love it,” she answered after a long moment, her words slurred. Desire stirred, rising through her blood like a leviathan from the deep, sweeping away her trancelike state.

“Perhaps I'll tie you in something every day, so that while you're working and baking and chatting with your friends you'll feel my ropes and think of me.”

A low moan of pure lust pushed out of her. A spicy little secret that no one would know about heated her blood and liquefied her core. “Think about you all the time already, sir.”

“I'm glad.” Positioning her so that she could still see him, he stepped between her outstretched thighs, her raised leg resting high on his waist. He ran his hands over each cord, tracing a path down to her thighs until his thumb rested against the knot at her clit. A jolt of want shot through her. “Whose is this?”

“Y-yours.”

His free hand stroked over his penis, pushing the hood back, revealing the engorged head already shiny with a bead of pre-come. “And this?”

“Mine,” she answered, surprising them both with the growl in her voice, the possessiveness. “That's mine.”

“Yours.” With his gaze never leaving hers, he curled his left hand into the ropes around her waist, using them for leverage as he entered her, a slow, measured progression that she felt every moment of. “Mine.”

When he bottomed out he held still, hot and hard inside her, filling her completely. A possessive light blazed in his eyes as he stared at her, then at the spot where they joined. “Ours.”

Emotion welled inside her, threatening to choke her. “Kaname.”

“You need to let go, Nadia,” he ordered, his soft voice at odds with his hard body as he pulled out of her. “Let go, and trust that I'll catch you.”

She stopped breathing as he filled her again in one long, slow, toe-curling glide. He threw back his head, the tendons of his neck standing out, his body rigid as her slick sheath welcomed him anew. “God, Nadia,” he groaned. “Good, so damn good.”

He began to move, long, slow strokes all the way out then all the way back in. She couldn't hold him, couldn't reach for him, could only accept the pleasure he gave her. Accept him she did, keeping her gaze locked to his, her inner muscles clamping down on him, her clit bumped by the knot and the root of his cock each time he buried himself deep.

Desire ignited an inferno inside her as she danced between being restrained and being unchained, between holding on and letting go. The ropes around her torso abraded her skin in a sweet pleasure-torture-pain-bliss that sent tingles shooting throughout her body. She surrendered to it, surrendered to Kane, to his mastery and his skill and his care, knowing that he'd catch her when she fell.

Her orgasm ambushed her a heartbeat later. She came with a keening cry, caught up in a white-hot ecstasy that rocketed her up and out into a sea of transcendental delight. As if her orgasm had given him permission he quickened his pace, the deep strokes coming faster and faster as her body hung suspended for him and his sensual onslaught. His hand settled on her mound, stroking and squeezing her clit, drawing her pleasure out stroke by sinful stroke. She tried to hold back, tried to delay her second climax, but she was too open, too needy, too ready for him.

The orgasm struck like a lightning bolt, hot and powerful and blinding. This time she screamed, body rigid, pleasure short-circuiting her senses. Kane grabbed her ropes with both hands as he went wild, growling as he drove into her, taking her with an intensity that was almost brutal. He came with a shout, clutching her close as he flooded her womb.

Warmth enveloped her. She opened her eyes to find herself in Kane's arms in the shower, the ropes gone. The diamond pattern marking her skin was the only reminder that she'd been bound. “Did I pass out?”

He kissed her as he helped her stand. “You went deep, sweetheart. Almost too deep.”

“You gave me permission to let go. I knew you'd be there to catch me.”

“I always will,” he promised. “Always.”

In that perfect moment, she believed him.

T
he dance beat that signaled Audie's ringtone jerked Nadia out of a sound sleep. She fumbled for the phone on the nightstand, conscious of Kane's warm bulk behind her. “Hello?”

“Nadia.”

“Audie? What time is it?”

“I don't know.” Audie's muffled voice wavered, thinned out. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called you.”

“Wait.” Nadia sat up, rubbing away sleep. “You sound weird. What's wrong? Did something bad happen?”

“Yeah.” Audie choked back a sob. “I messed up, Nadia. I messed up so bad. Can you come?”

“Of course I can.” Audie had been acting strange for the last couple of days, but refused to talk to Nadia about whatever was bothering her despite Nadia's repeated attempts to get her to talk. In the short time that she'd known the younger woman, Nadia had never seen Audie cry, though she knew the redhead had plenty of reason to. She knew Audie's gleeful fuck-em-all attitude—literally and figuratively—was a weapon in the arsenal she used to keep people at bay, to protect the scared little girl she kept hidden away. For that armor, so ingrained, to crack now meant that something truly horrible had happened.

Nadia slid out of bed as Kane stirred. “Are you at home?”

“Yeah,” Audie said. “My neighbor called the police. I don't want to talk to them without you here.”

Police? Dread gripped her as she searched for her clothes, only to remember that she'd been in harem girl mode all weekend, which meant no clothes. She juggled the phone as she found and opened her overnight bag, pulling out a sweater and a pair of jeans. What the hell had happened at Audie's that the police needed to be called? “Audie, I'm on the way. But if the police get there before I do, you have to let them in, okay? You don't want them to break the door down or anything dangerous.”

“Okay.” Another sob. “Don't call Sugar or Vanessa. Please.”

God. “All right, Audie. I won't call them. I'll be there in a few minutes. I promise.”

She disconnected, tossing the phone on the bed before hopping into the jeans, followed by her bra and the sweater. She turned to find Kane out of bed, already getting dressed. “It's Audie. Something's happened.”

“So I gathered.” He pulled his jeans on, carefully tucking himself in. “Do you know what's going on?”

“No, but it must be bad. Audie never asks for help. And she never cries.” She grabbed her phone, headed for the hall. “I have to go.”

“Of course. I'm going with you.”

She turned to face him. “You don't have to do that.”

“I know.” He nudged her hip to propel her back into motion. “I'm going anyway.”

“It might not be a good idea,” she argued, heading for the door. She didn't think Audie would appreciate her bringing Kane along, and, if she was being completely honest, she wasn't sure she wanted Kane to see the messier aspects of her life and her friends' lives. Though Audie was a part of their recovery group, Nadia and the others all knew Audie hadn't hit her rock bottom yet. If this moment was it, it was going to be messy, ugly, and extremely painful.

She wrenched open the coat closet door and pulled out her coat, then shoved her feet into her ballet flats. “Audie sounds like she's in a bad way, Kane. She said her neighbor called the police.”

“Then we'd better hurry.” He slipped his own jacket on, then pulled out his keys.

Why was he being so insistent about this? “Kane, seriously—”

“No arguments, Nadia,” he said as he ushered her out the door and into the hall. “What the hell kind of man would I be if I let my woman go out at two in the morning and drive alone and upset to wherever her friend lives?”

She blinked at him. Oh my God, did he just say
my woman
? Her brain couldn't begin to process the implications of his use of those words, not when she needed to get to Audie. Something had happened, something bad, and she needed to be there. “Okay.”

Out of sorts, she allowed Kane to guide her out to the parking garage. Kane was right, she wouldn't have been worth crap driving through town to Audie's apartment complex on the southeastern side of the city. She gave Kane Audie's address, watching as he plugged it into the car's GPS. His calm, assured demeanor wrapped around her, dampening her panic for Audie. She focused on the fact that Audie was alive and had been well enough to call her. That she'd called for help—and her neighbor had called the police—worried Nadia more than she'd cared to admit to Kane.

He saw her worry anyway. Wordlessly, he reached over, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. She returned the squeeze, suddenly grateful that he'd chosen to accompany her. She could have Audie's back, knowing that Kane would have hers.

Flashing lights and curious neighbors led the way to Audie's second-floor apartment in a complex filled with singles and college students. Nadia waited until Kane killed the engine before leaping out of the car and running up the stairs. She pushed through the onlookers and into Audie's busted door, before pushing her way inside, then jerked to a stop.

It wasn't as bad as she'd feared.

It was worse.

“Audie!”

Audie sat in the only unbroken chair at her kitchen table. Her bottom lip was busted, her left eye swollen shut, the turquoise beaded top she wore ripped and stained with blood. “Oh, Audie.”

“Should see the other guy,” Audie mumbled. She managed to open her left eye, then groaned. “You brought the professor with you? Great, like I needed more witnesses to my stupidity.”

Nadia blinked back hot tears spurred by the sudden fury burning through her. She knelt beside Audie, mindful of the paramedic working on her. “Who the hell did this to you?”

“My date,” Audie mumbled, wincing as the paramedic dabbed something on the laceration above her right eye. “He didn't want to take no for an answer.”

God.
Bile rose in Nadia's throat. “Did he . . . ?”

“He tried.” Audie glanced at her before her gaze shifted away. “Threw me down, ripped my shirt. I went for his nuts. He hit me, I hit him back, and world war three started. Jane pounded on the wall and said she'd called the cops. He took off.”

“You told the cops who he was, right?”

When Audie remained silent, Nadia leaned forward. “You do know what his name is, right?”

Audie glared. “I might not be able to bag a professor, but I have some standards.”

Nadia bit back a retort. They both knew obtaining last names wasn't high on the list of priorities when Audie went out bagging and tagging. “Audie, if you remember his name you need to file a police report so you can press charges when he's found. Whatever happened up to the point you said no doesn't matter. What he's done to you isn't right. He attacked you. Who knows what would have happened if your neighbor hadn't been home?”

Audie closed her eyes. “I met him tonight at Miller's Bar. His name is Brian. I think his last name is Peacock or Peabody. Something like that. He said he's a regular there.”

Miller's was a known meat market for the college-aged crowd. People went there looking for a good time with their preferred poison, whether that poison was drugs, alcohol, sex, or a combination thereof. It wasn't a place Nadia would go within ten feet of, not even in her former life.

The police officer stepped forward. “Did you go there with anyone else?”

“No.” Audie pulled her lips back in a grimace. “It's not the sort of place my friends would be caught dead in.”

“Audie.” That hurt, even though Nadia had just thought the same thing. Kane squeezed her shoulder, and that brief touch of support comforted her as she regained her feet.

“Can you provide a description of your attacker, miss?”

Audie sighed then winced in obvious pain. Nadia reached out, but the paramedic stopped her. She understood why, but the urge to protect her friend prickled across her skin. She needed to do something.

Audie gave the officer a description of her erstwhile date and his car as the paramedic finished tending to her. As soon as the officer indicated he had enough information, Nadia turned to the paramedic. “Are you taking her to the hospital?”

“No! No hospital. This is embarrassing enough without being carted out of here on a gurney in front of all my neighbors!”

“Ma'am.” The medic looked up at Audie, his eyes dark and sympathetic in his olive-toned face. “I know this isn't easy, but it's my job to take care of you. You're alert now, but you were fuzzy earlier, do you remember?”

Audie frowned, winced, then frowned again. “Not a ma'am.”

Concern clenched Nadia's stomach muscles. That wasn't a good sign, was it? Audie could have a head injury, internal bleeding, and the people that were supposed to take care of her were sitting around like it was just another day at the office.

“Audie.” The paramedic spoke again, his voice soft yet commanding. “Do you remember me?”

Nadia watched Audie focus on the man kneeling in front of her. “You're Jose, Jose with the kind eyes.”

“That's right.” He smiled, and it was like looking into the face of an angel. “Do you remember what I told you?”

“You promised to help me. Most people always make promises they don't keep though.”

Nadia clamped a hand over her mouth to hold back an automatic denial. Before she could lodge a protest, the paramedic spoke again. “Then it's a good thing I'm not like most people. Everyone here wants to help you. That means letting me do my job, letting all of us do our jobs. We need to make sure you're okay, that there are no internal injuries. And you need to give the police all the information and evidence you can.”

“Nadia can pack a bag for you,” Kane said, the calm in his voice soothing Nadia's worry. “I called a friend of mine. Her name is Sally Jensen and she's an advocate and a counselor. She'll meet us at the hospital and help you through the next part.”

Nadia held her breath, but Audie nodded. “All right.”

The two men were able to convince Audie where Nadia could not. In that moment, she didn't care if it meant that Audie would get the help she desperately needed. The paramedics bundled Audie into the ambulance while Nadia quickly packed a bag and followed with Kane.

The wait at the hospital was interminable. She wanted to be with Audie, but when she asked if she could, the nurse who'd gone to check didn't return. She paced the waiting room, too keyed up to sit, to drink the coffee Kane had gotten for her.

“I should call the others. Should I call the others?”

“Having them here would be good for you,” he answered. “But you said Audie asked you not to call them. You don't want to do anything to upset her further.”

“You're right. I know you're right.” She stopped pacing, biting down on her thumbnail instead. “What's taking so long?”

Kane crossed to her, wrapped his fingers around her wrist, then gently pulled her hand down. “You want the doctors to be thorough,” he told her. “The police also need to finish their report and document every bit of evidence in case Audie decides to press charges.”

“In case?” she echoed. “What do you mean? Of course Audie's going to press charges!”

“I hope she does. That's why I called Sally Jensen. She's very good at what she does. Audie is in good hands.”

Nadia wanted to believe him. Through it all Kane was a silent, steadfast presence. She wanted to push him away. She wanted to bury her face in the crook of his neck and just breathe him in. Mostly she wanted to be in his ropes again, free to do nothing but feel the pleasure he gave her.

No. She couldn't think like that, think about that, with Audie in trouble and hurting. Taking a deep breath, she stepped back from him, back from the comfort he offered. “You should probably go.”

A hint of a frown creased his forehead. “I will. Once we make sure Audie is okay and you're home.”

She couldn't let him do it, couldn't let him get more involved in her life and the lives of her friends. He was already in deep enough that even this moment of trying to push him out ripped at her, ripped her deep. She had to do it, and she had to do it now before she fell even further.

“That's not necessary, Kane,” she told him, wrapping her arms about herself. “You've had a long day, and I can't ask you to do anything else for us.”

“You had the same long day, Nadia,” he reminded her, his tone so gentle and understanding it almost broke her. “You don't have to ask, because I want to help. Besides, your car's at my place. If the doctors release Audie, I'll drive both of you back to your place and drop your car off tomorrow.”

He closed the distance between them again by hooking his hand into the band of her jeans. Wrapping his fingers around her wrists, he gently pried her arms open, then cradled her against his chest. “Stop trying to push me away,” he said against her hair. “It's not going to happen.”