Authors: David Mamet
G
OULD
: . . . that she would . . .?
F
OX
: Yeah. That she would
anything.
(
Pause.
) That she would anything. (
Pause.
) That she would deal with you in any other than a professional way. (
Pause.
)
G
OULD
: Well, my, my, my, my, my.
F
OX
: What can I tell you, “
Bob.
”
G
OULD
: That I can get her on a date, that I can get her to my house, that I can screw her.
F
OX
: I don't think so.
G
OULD
: How much? (
Pause.
)
F
OX
: A hundred bucks.
G
OULD
: That's enough?
F
OX
: Five hundred bucks that you can't.
G
OULD
: Five hundred? That's enough?
F
OX
: A gentleman's bet.
G
OULD
: Done. Now get out of here, and let me work . . . the Coventry at One. I need . . .
F
OX
: The script, the budget, chain of ownership . . .
G
OULD
: Good.
F
OX
: I'll swing by my, I'll bring it to lunch.
G
OULD
: Good. Char . . . (
Pause.
)
F
OX
: What?
G
OULD
: Thank you.
F
OX
: Hey. Fuck you. (
Exits.
)
(
G
OULD
sits alone for a moment, writing. K
AREN
enters.)
K
AREN
: Mr. Gould . . .
G
OULD
: Bobby.
K
AREN
: Sir. (
Pause.
) I was not able to get you a table at the Coventry. But I tentatively booked you at. . .
G
OULD
: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. (Pause.) It's alright. I'm going to tell you what you did, and it's alright you did it. Sit down. You called up the Coventry and asked them for a table for two at one o'clock. And they told you they had absolutely nothing. That right?
K
AREN
: Yes. (
Pause.
) I . . . I . . . I'm so sorry. Of course. I should have mentioned your name.
G
OULD
: It's alright.
K
AREN
: It was very . . . it was
naïve
of me.
G
OULD
: It's alright.
K
AREN
: I had . . . no: you're right. I had a thought, when I was hanging up, then I thought: “You forgot to . . .”
G
OULD
: . . . it's alright.
K
AREN
: “You forgot to ‘tell’ them,” then I thought: “what difference does it make? If they don't have a
table
. . .”
G
OULD
: It's alright.
K
AREN
: If they didn't have a table, what difference who called up? But, of
course,
they have a table for
you
. . . I'm sorry. It was naïve of me.
G
OULD
: Listen, there's nothing wrong with being naïve, with learning . . .
K
AREN (
simultaneously with “learning"): And I'm sure. . . I'm sorry.
Gould: No, go on.
K
AREN
: . . . I was going to say . . .
G
OULD
: . . . yes . . .?
K
AREN
: I was going to say that I'm sure that much of a job like this, a job like this, is learning to think in a . . .
G
OULD
: Yes.
K
AREN
: To think in a . . . business fashion.
G
OULD
: That's what makes the life exciting,
addictive, you
know what I'm talking about, you want a
thrill
in your life?
K
AREN
: . . . a thrill. . .?
G
OULD
: To
make
something, to
do
something, to be a
part
of something. Money, art, a chance to Play at the Big Table . . . Hey, you're here, and you want to participate in it. (
Pause.
)
K
AREN
: Yes.
G
OULD
: Well, of course you do. And it
is
an exciting world.
K
AREN
: I'm sure it is.
G
OULD
: Sudden changes all the time. You want to
know
some of it. Now, you want to know a secret?
K
AREN
: Yes.
G
OULD
: I'll
tell
you one. Siddown. (K
AREN
sits.
) Charlie Fox comes in and he's formed a relationship with Doug Brown. Doug will leave his studio and do a film with us. Charlie Fox brought it to us, brought it to
me
really. And in the Highest Traditions of the Motion Picture Industry, we're actually going to make a movie.
K
AREN
: Is it a good film?
G
OULD
: I'm sorry.
K
AREN
: Is it a good film?
G
OULD
: Well, it's a commodity. And I admire you for not being ashamed to ask the question. Yes, it's a good question, and I don't
know
if it is a good film. “What about Art?” I'm not an artist. Never said I was, and nobody who sits in this chair can be. I'm a businessman. “Can't we try to make good films?” Yes. We try. I'm going to try to make a good film of this prison film. The question: Is there such a thing as a good film which loses money? In general, of course. But, really, not. For
me,
‘cause if the films I make lose money, then I'm back on the streets with a sweet and silly smile on my face, they lost money ‘cause nobody saw them, it's my fault. A tree fell in the forest, what did I accomplish? Yes. You
see
? There is a way things are. Some people are elected, try to change the world, this job is not that job. Somebody, somebody . . . in this job, in the job I have, somebody is always trying to “promote” you: to use
something,
some “hook” to get you to do something in their own best interest. You follow me?
K
AREN
: Of course.
G
OULD
: ‘Cause
this
desk
is a position to
advance,
y'understand? It's a
platform
to
aid,
to push someone along. But I Can't
Do
It. Why? That's not my business. My business is to make decisions for the studio. Means I have to be
blunt,
to say “no,” much, most of the time, that's my job. And I think it's a
good
job: ‘cause it's a job of
responsibility.
Pressure, many rewards.
One
of them, one time in a billion years, someone was loyal to me, and I'm talking about Charlie Fox, stuck
with
me, comes in here, let's face it, does a favor for me . . . he could of took the script across the street, no, but he
came to me, now—I can throw in with him and we rise together. That's what the job is. It's a job, all the bullshit aside, deals with
people.
(
He hunts on his desk, picks up a copy of the book he was reading from earlier.
) Look here. Agent gives his client's book to Ross: “The Bridge or, Radiation and the Half-Life of Society”: Now,
who
is Mister Ross, now . . .?
K
AREN
: He is the Head of the Studio.
G
OULD
: And he has a button on my console. That's right. Author's agent gave this book to Ross. A novel. Written by a Very Famous Eastern Writer. What's this book about? “The End of the World.” Great. Now: Ross, no dummy, says, of course, he'll read the book. Gives
me
the book to read, so when he tells the author “how he loved the book but it won't make a movie,” he can say something intelligent about it. You get it? This, in the business, is called “a courtesy read. “
K
AREN
: A courtesy read.
G
OULD
: Yes. No one has any intention of making the book, but we read it, as a courtesy. Does this mean that we're depraved? No. It's just business . . . how business is done, you see?
K
AREN
: I think.
G
OULD
: A business. Start to close.
K
AREN
: But what if there is something in the book?
G
OULD
: In the book?
K
AREN
: Yes. (Pause.)
G
OULD
: It's a novel about the historical effects of radiation . . .
K
AREN
: Yes, but. . .
G
OULD
: I mean, I mean, the author's crazy as a fucken’ June bug.
K
AREN
: But, but.
G
OULD
: . . . what if. . .?
K
AREN
: Yes.
G
OULD
: What if, after everything . . .
K
AREN
: . . . yes . . .
G
OULD
: Hope against hope, there is
something
in the book.
K
AREN
: Yes.
G
OULD
:
Something
in the book, that. . .
K
AREN
: Yes. (Pause.)
G
OULD
: Well, I'd be delighted. No. You're right. You're right. I'll tell you. (
Pause.
) You're making my point. Absolutely. This job corrupts you. You start to think, all the time “what do these people want from me?” (
Pause.
) And everything becomes a task. (
Pause.
)
K
AREN
: Does it have to be that?
G
OULD
: Can we keep ourselves pure? Hey, I prayed to be pure.
K
AREN
: You prayed? To be pure?
G
OULD
: I did, I said God give me the job as Head of Production. Give me a platform to be “good, “ and I'll be good. They gave me the job, I'm here one day and
look
at me: a Big Fat Whore. A book, it may be a
fine, fine
book by a well-respected writer. And because this writer's got the reputation being “artsy” . . . artsy, you understand . . . I'm ready, everybody backs me up in
this, to assume that his book is unsuitable for the screen, so I look on it as a “courtesy read.”
K
AREN
: Do you enjoy your work?
G
OULD
: Excuse me?
K
AREN
: Do, if I'm being too frank . . .
G
OULD
: . . . do I enjoy my work? Yes. Very much. (
Pause.
) Don't you think
you
would enjoy it?
K
AREN
: Yes, I think I would enjoy it.
G
OULD
: You do? Good for you. What of it would you enjoy?
K
AREN
: The making decisions.
G
OULD
: Then good for you.
K
AREN
: Because . . .
G
OULD
: . . . yes . . .?
K
AREN
: Perhaps I'm naïve, but I would think that if you could keep your values straight, if you had
principles
to
refer
to, then . . .
G
OULD
: Hmmm.
K
AREN
: I know it's naïve . . .
G
OULD
: Yes it is naïve, and it's also correct.
K
AREN
: You think it is?
G
OULD
: Yes, I do. Now, we could talk about purity or we could turn the page. What do you want to do?
K
AREN
: Talk about purity.
G
OULD
: Okay. (
Pause.
) If you don't have
principles,
whatever they are . . . then each day is hell, you haven't got
a compass. All you've got is “good taste” and you can shove good taste up your ass and fart “The Carnival of Venice.” Good taste will not hack it. ‘Cause each day the pressure just gets worse. It gets more difficult. (
Pause.
) I want you to do me a favor. Read that book for me.
K
AREN
:
I
should read it. . .?
G
OULD
: Yes.
K
AREN
: The Radiation Book?
G
OULD
: Let's be frank: it's probably, it's almost definitely unsuitable, it probably
is
artsy. But as you said, maybe it isn't.
You
read it, you'll tell me, and I'll tell Mr. Ross.
Karen: . . . I. . .
G
OULD
: . . . and then, you're right, and then at least we looked.
K
AREN
: I'd be flattered to read it.
G
OULD
: Good.
K
AREN
: Thank you.
G
OULD
: Not at all. I thank
you.
I'll need a report on it. . .
K
AREN
: . . . of course.
G
OULD
: By tonight. How long will it take you to . . .
K
AREN
: Well, I won't be able to start reading it ‘til after work. . .
G
OULD
(
simultaneously with “work"
): Fine. Tonight, I'm going to be home. When you're finished, you bring the report to me and we'll discuss it.
K
AREN
: Absolutely. Thank you.
G
OULD
: Not at all. Now, I've . .. Please call the Coventry. Tell them, a table for Mr. Fox and me, twenty minutes . . .
K
AREN
: Yes, I will.
G
OULD
: I'm going to clean up here before I go. Call Mr. Fox's girl up on the phone, get her to
page
him or to try him in the car.