Son of Ra (9 page)

“Were talking about my brother?”

“Yes!”

“And he knows all this?”

“Most of it.”

“What doesn’t he know?”

“How I feel about you?”

“Oh!  So he didn’t know your motives?”  I guessed.

“Perhaps.  But he knew what it would gain him to have you out of the way and at the same time, safe and not dead as you would have been the other night if I hadn’t been there.  But there is no question in that, because I have been there all the time and would not have missed it.”

When else had he been there?  Kind of creepy to think about.

“The court raised me.  My sired father who raised me after childhood was just trying to protect me.  In me he had awoken a fight for what I wanted.  Before that day, I couldn't keep you safe enough.”

“He must have been a great father.”

He didn’t know how to answer that.

He heard something above him.  I looked at the way his face went up towards the sky.   A nest of birds sat directly above us. 

Cas bent over beside him and picked something up off the ground.  I couldn’t tell what he was doing, but it seemed like he was trying to handle something delicate and small by the way he cupped his hands.

“A baby bird.  Oh, my, is it dying?”

He silently flew up three feet and gently sat the bird back in its nest.

“I thought a mama bird wouldn’t take her baby back after it’s touched by human hands?”

“Myth, but I’m not human either.”

I laughed at the irony.  Lots of that lately.

We didn’t eat again.  I wasn’t that hungry.  My knotted stomach kept talking to me and screaming to keep everything clear to avoid losing my food.  The other sensations were stirring around with it.  Every sense heightened to a maximum level combined with nerves and the warm feeling he shot through my body every time he touched me just making me want to break down and scream.

He lay down again but asked, “Are you ready to return?”

“No.”  I should have said yes.  I was supposed to say yes.  He knows I should say yes. 

On my back, I pointed to the night sky, naming every star I could name just to keep us there as long as possible.  I only had hours till my friends would be there to take me back to my fake life at Hunter school and wait for what would happen next.  When I’d run out of stars, I laid there wondering how to ask my next question.  “What will the Hunters do when I return?”

“Dr. Green has agreed to cover for your identity break and let you stay on at the school till the term is finished.  You are welcome back into your court, but danger lurks there simply because every faction knows your secret now.  You should—

What was he going to say?  Am I safe anywhere?
  “I don’t need protection.  I don’t need anyone.”  My heart hardened back into the callous protective shield I’d hidden behind my whole life. 

“Perhaps.  But there are others who need you.”  He let the last two words linger in the air.

“I can’t go back to court. I don’t belong there.”

“You don’t have to.”  His voice was soft and sad.

“If I go back to the school, I will be safe by means by means of warning signals before anything could happen.  I don’t need protection, and if I did, they are a school of Hunters.  Even in herds, they are strong enough to ward off most evils.”

“Are you sure about that?”

No!
  “Yes!”  But my voice didn’t sound reassuring.  A surge of heat ran up the length of me like the lie had a way of revealing itself.  The hair on the back of my neck surged up and stood on end.  The stilted conversation left me at a loss.

“If that is your decision.”

What was he hinting at?

He cleaned up all of the spread and stood clasping the satchel closed.  His hand reached out to mine.  I stared at it for a second too long thinking about not being able to touch him again.  I wasn’t sure if I could leave that behind, but I wasn’t sure I should abandon my friends who I hoped were diligently searching for me high and low.

I felt his arm slide around my waist instead and I closed my eyes as we ascended into the night sky.

Chapter Nine

There are two things a person should never be angry at…

We returned under an early morning skyline of bright stars and sad sighs as he walked me to the room I was staying in.  I kept my back to him holding the doorknob tight making my fingernails bend against my skin and heard him swallow. 

“I still don’t understand why you brought me here really, but I can’t say to anyone that I was tortured and miserable.  I will hopefully appreciate the gesture when I find out more of what happened at the school and see that everyone is okay and alive."

I knew with everything I had that I should not have turned around. It would be my downfall and make every last part of myself fall to pieces like the old
me
would have never done.  I knew that I would lose the small amount of credit left to my dignity when I looked up into his eyes.  And I crumbled every bit of what I said I wouldn’t do. 

“I want you…to know that I will be here…if you need anything.”  The door opened and I wanted to fly to the balcony to escape his words.

My hand behind me held my body up with only the doorknob to keep me from falling.  I touched his face with the other.  Just touched.  One more time.  He stood stiffly not moving with fists beside him.  Was he trying to avoid me?  Perhaps keep from getting hurt?

“I don’t know what to do.”  Not very philosophical, but it works.

His hand was on my cheek now as was mine still on his.  He leaned in, and just barely, gently touched my lips with his.  I never closed my eyes.  I wanted to watch his face a little longer.  His eyes never closed.  How could one person intensely affect me?

His hand went behind my neck and drew me close enough I could feel his warmth coming through the coldness of his skin.  He inhaled deeply and met my steady gaze then returned my own words to me. 
How is that you affect me so?

He stayed there close and then backed up leaving. I heard the door to the room beside mine open and close and let go of the longest breath I’ve ever held. 

I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, then showered cold and long to erase the feelings stirring inside me.  My mind replayed the entire night lingering completely on the end moment. I couldn’t stay.  I had to return and find out how all this plays out. 

I settled in the bed wearing just a tank and shorts since I felt sure he’d not even bother to check on me tonight.  The air seemed warmer or maybe it was just me.  

I thought about what Calum was doing to prepare to come get me tomorrow.  What Dr. Green and my father were doing to make it all happen.  Why I was saved by Cas? I still don’t know who was supposed to have killed me that night.

The Elves.

“The Elves?” I whispered to him. 
Why would they want to hurt me?

You risk their separation. They’ve been told you’re the enemy. They want to be left alone.

Alone?             
             

I was starting to drift off.  I felt like I was already dreaming when I heard him answer.

I love you!

I thought he said something I recognized as I floated into dreamland.  It was lost then though I was sure of what I heard.  He was standing in front of me in the gardens at my home holding hands and looking up at Orion.  We followed the path of the stars down to the belt of Orion naming each star.  I saw the same spread in front of me. 

Are you in my dream?

Only if you want me to be.

Can we go anywhere?

It’s your dream.

Then take me to the stars.  I don’t want to be anywhere else but with you.

As you wish!

And we went up and up and up until I couldn’t remember anything else but the sound of the air moving around me and the smell of his cologne I will never get enough of.

This is a dream, right?

Yes!

  My eyes opened after hours with him, my face was wet with prespiration.  I’d shed the covers and felt a draft on the one leg that was hanging off the side of the bed.

I sat up
. 
It felt so real.  It couldn’t have been because I’m exactly where I was when I laid down.  I looked down seeing that I was still wearing my favorite pink shorts and tank. 

Seeing the balcony door closed, I opened it to feel the breeze.  It felt wonderful.  My hand hurried to my shoulders as I felt the chill hit me.  The ring.  It was gone!

Frantic, I searched the bed, the shower, the floor everywhere.  It was gone.  Then I had a thought.  Could he hear me?  All this chaos in my head.  The crazy girl talk.  My dream.  He’d said he loved me in the dream.  Did I really hear that?

And I meant it.

Huh!
  I gasped. 
Cas?  Can you hear me?

Yes!  And I you.

I lost my ring. 

It’s okay.  I prefer to hear you.

I kind of like the thought of hearing you.  I didn’t think I would. Can you see me?
  A fear rose in my chest still ignoring what was said.  It was too soon.  Or was it.  Can a person find their perfect match and know instantly?

Can you see me?

No!
  I felt bold like I'd never been.

Boxers or briefs?

Neither!

Huh!
  I gasped.

And you?

A girl keeps her secrets, but the night air feels wonderful on my skin.

I know.

WHAT?  You said you couldn’t see me.
  I backed up into the room.

He laughed inside himself.  It sounded strange in a thought pattern. 
I can’t
. 
But your thoughts before gave you away.  I'm just lying here pretending to need sleep so I can try to feel what you might be feeling.  It makes me feel closer to you.

I thought about what he’d mentioned in my dream. 
It was a dream, right?

I think so.  It’s hard to say.  I’ve never heard anyone before to know if I could hear thoughts and dreams.  But I think that it was your subconscious talking maybe, because you answered me and I answered you.  And you say you don’t remember it?

He asked another question before I answered. 
And you didn’t see where I was in the dream, only what we said?

Yes and no. I liked it.   

Neither of us said anything for a long time.

My room is really great.  I’m starting to think the only reason you have this balcony is to see the moonlight.

I grabbed the blanket from the end of the bed and wrapped in it sitting against the rail. 

I can think of a couple other good reasons to add to it now
.  I caught a minor hint, but wasn’t sure yet if I should act on it.

I feel like the moon is a sun.   Like it’s warming me. 

The moon is my sun.

I think I understand what that means.  You know everything my mind thinks.  I’m not sure that is a good thing.

Why not?  I love the way you think.

I felt my neck again uneased by the admissions. 
Where is the ring?

Silence.  The air moved around behind my back.  I bent my neck sideways to cover it with my blanket.  Before it made it, I felt something touch my neck.  I should have jumped, but I knew.  I closed my eyes waiting for him to right himself and move around me.

Why do you affect me so? 
“I didn’t mean to think that.  See, you hear my hidden thoughts you shouldn’t be allowed to know.”

His hands stretched out pulling around my neck.  He signaled to pick my hair up.  I did.  And he clasped the necklace kissing my neck slowly, his lips ridiculously warm.  I felt myself fold down in the melting stage of the kiss.  So obvious, I was starting to almost pant.

My thoughts guarded now, I waited for him to sit or move somewhere else at least but instead crouched beside me, shirtless, and not the least bit cold. 
Hej!

“Why can’t I walk around shirtless like that so you could feel uncomfortable?”  He makes my temperature rise too fast.

His eyes wide and away from me for one long second, “You could, but I would be severely distracted and unable to control myself.”

“From what?”  I was worried he was hinting at the idea he could hurt me. 

He shook his head and looked down between his knees at his bare feet.

“What,” I demanded and watched his face still making sure I didn’t miss a detail.  “Could you hurt me?  You wouldn’t accidentally kill me, right?”  I didn’t sound rational.

“No.  You thought I meant…Kissa, your mind is impossible.  I didn’t mean…Stace, I could never hurt you.  I meant…” He stood. 

There are things I’ve not felt.  Things I’ve not seen.  I shouldn’t have been looking, but I couldn’t stop myself.  I turned my head knowing my cheeks were glowing red in a very uncomfortable situation for the non-societal girl.  I just buried my head in my knees in total embarrassment.

He was facing away sitting silhouetted in the moonlight.  He ran his hand through his hair and left it sitting on the back of his bare neck. It rippled as he moved his hand back hidden in the front of him.  I put my head back down.

I heard him move back towards where I sat.  He tugged my hand as I folded upwards, my blanket falling to the ground after a minute passed.  Everything on me froze as I realized I hadn’t put enough clothes on.  I
was
clothed, just not
enough
to keep him sane I guessed.  I snatched the blanket and wrapped it back around me seeing him look as if he might keel over any second.  He folded it the rest of the way watching my eyes the whole time.  I just watched him act the gentleman he was.

“You don’t realize how hard it is to walk away from you.  I was teasing you, not threatening you.  I am truly affected by you and weakness is new for me.”

“A weakness?”

“Yes, I can’t seem to talk logically around you or remain a gentleman.”

“Maybe that’s because you’re half naked and I can’t concentrate in the least.” 

He smiled down at me, “You could still take off your shirt, if you like.”

I blew the hot air out my mouth upward to keep from screaming, “You are…in bad need of a cold shower.”

“You can join me.”

“You need to go back to your room.”

“You coming?”

I walked towards him where he was leaning on the balcony, hair blowing in the slight wind, arms folded neatly, one leg crossed, and tilting his head just enough to look smoldering and sexy beyond belief.

I believe my intention was to put my hand out towards him and just prove my aggravation, but it didn’t go down that way.  As soon as I stepped into his personal space, he reached out throwing his arms around my middle, lifted me slightly in the air elevating me to his height, and said the unbelievable. 

“No, you’re not coming to my room because I don’t want to mess this up.”  He kissed my neck just beside my neckline.  “Yes, I need a cold shower because if I don’t, I’ll combust before I leave this balcony.”    He kissed a series from my ear to the corner of my mouth.   “And yes, I will not give up.  I’ve waited for a very long time for you.”  He kissed me full on.  His tongue merged into mine.  I couldn’t stop the shiver that ran through from head to my toes.  He pulled tighter making the blanket hug me.  His tongue reached farther threatening a fire in me that was going to spread fast and devour me if he didn’t stop.  I gave in.  I wanted it.  I pulled one arm free and wrapped my fingers into a twist of his hair.  I was going to lose control.  He realized my urgency and pulled me back.  He sat me on solid ground and forced my height to be averted back down to his biceps staring at me.  My breathing was out of control.  At least I noticed, so was his.

“You will be the death of me,” he said through puffs.

“I hope that is teasing again,” I whispered through my own ragged breaths.

He pulled me back.  I would totally go for round two.

He kissed me gently on the forehead, “I will go now.  Let you get some sleep.”

“Don’t.”  I didn’t know what I was saying.  “I mean, stay here.   Just lay beside me.  You’re so warm.  And I don’t think I can sleep knowing your lying in the bed on the other side of that wall.”  He seemed reluctant.  I couldn’t read the whys, but I could guess it was somewhere between the want to and the dangers of it.  When I thought he was going to say no, he nodded a yes.  I walked back to the bed dropping the blanket on the floor.  I didn’t want to seem embarrassed by my tank and shorts. 

“Better slip that blanket back around you,” his voice was distant and unreadable.

“Why?”  I analyzed that too quickly.  The wrong way.

“I have to spell everything out.”

I waited.

“I am not going to be able to hold you wearing that and keep from touching you. You're not wearing enough.  Leave it at that.”

I slipped over to the dresser and pulled out a pair of black yoga pants.  I slipped them on over my shorts and slid under the covers.  He lay down beside me, but too far.  I didn’t have any idea what I thought I was doing, but I just couldn’t stop myself from any of it.  I patted just beside me.