Sleigh Bells in the Snow (24 page)

“We cut down a Christmas tree yesterday.”

Walter sniffed. “I bet you used the snowmobile. That’s no way to see the forest. You need to walk or get Dana to take you on the sled with those dogs of hers. Gives you a real feel for the place. You ever see a sugar maple?” When Kayla shook her head he waved a hand toward the trees. “These maples need a certain amount of cold to produce sap for maple syrup.”

“I just had some on my pancakes. It was delicious.”

“Come back in March and I’ll teach you how it’s done.”

“Is that an invitation?” Kayla discovered she was holding her breath.

“It sounded like one, didn’t it?”

It felt like a huge step forward. She felt light inside and then he hefted the ax and she remembered how worried Elizabeth was about him chopping wood.

“Can I do that?”

His expression was incredulous. “You?”

“Can’t really get a feel for Snow Crystal without having chopped some logs. I’ve burned through plenty in my cabin. The least I can do is replace them.” Thinking about the log fire in her cabin made her think about Jackson, and her insides flipped like one of Élise’s pancakes.

It didn’t matter how long she put it off, eventually she was going to have to face him.

But not yet.

Walter gave her a long look and then gestured to the log under his foot. “We’re cutting it to the right length. Secret is to let the weight of the ax do the work. Doesn’t need to be razor-sharp. Blunt is good.”

“How does it cut if it’s blunt?”

“You’re not cutting it, you’re splitting it.” Walter brought the ax down with a
thwack,
and Kayla flinched.

“Should you be doing that?”

He wedged his foot on the log and worked the ax free. “Are you suggesting I’m too old for this?”

“No.” She searched for tact and ended up with direct and honest. “Elizabeth mentioned you had chest pain.”

“She fusses. It was indigestion. Too much good food.” He brought down the ax again, splitting the log. “There’s enough work around this place to keep a whole army occupied, and Jackson doesn’t have an army so we all need to do our bit.”

That fiercely spoken statement brought a lump to her throat. She wished Jackson could have heard it.

“He loves this place.”

Walter stood still, his breath clouding the air. “Maybe he does.”

“Maybe?” Kayla wondered how he could doubt it. “He came back, didn’t he?”

“Didn’t have any choice about that.”

“There’s always a choice, Walter.”

“Not to Jackson.” He bent to throw the logs on the pile with the others. “He feels a debt. A sense of responsibility. He’s bound to this place. It’s a failing and a strength.”

“How can it be a failing?”

Walter hesitated. “Because a man shouldn’t throw away his whole life doing something that doesn’t feel right, just to please others.”

Kayla thought about her father. About the years he’d been married to her mother before he’d finally got out and gone to the woman he loved.

“Maybe this feels right to Jackson. But you’re right—he needs all the help he can get. So let me help.”

Walter wiped his forehead on his sleeve. “You seriously want to chop logs?”

“Yes.” She pushed up the sleeves of her fleece. “I’ve been known to use the gym when I can’t think of an excuse not to. I’m sure I can lift an ax.”

Walter handed it to her. “Don’t chop your foot off or that grandson of mine will take the next ax to my head. According to him, you’re valuable.”

Kayla felt the weight of it in her hands. “So I just swing it, right?” She laughed as Walter took a rapid step backward. Then she raised the ax and brought it down hard, as she’d seen him do. The log split. “Wow. I did that!” She grinned with delight and Walter grinned back, his weathered face creasing.

“That’s a hell of a move you’ve got there.” He nodded at the splintered wood. “If I’d known you could chop like that, I would have been more polite the other night. You mad at someone?”

“No, not mad.” She brought the ax down again and then toed the log she’d chopped with a rush of pride. “Maybe a little, with myself.”

Walter picked up the pieces and tossed them on the pile. “For falling in love when you didn’t want to?”

Kayla froze. “I can absolutely assure you that—”

“Don’t blame yourself. First time Elizabeth set eyes on Snow Crystal, she was gone. Same for my mother.”

He meant the place,
Kayla thought, not the person. Snow Crystal, not Jackson. “It’s certainly special.”

“Glad you think so—” The deep male voice came from behind her, and when she turned, Jackson was standing there, arms folded, broad shoulders resting against the tree as he watched her with the same blue eyes that had seen her lose control the night before. “I’ve been looking for you. Didn’t realize you had a date with another man.”

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

S
HE
LOOKED
GOOD
for a woman who’d had less than four hours sleep, but nowhere near as good as she’d looked lying naked on the rug in the firelight. He wished she were back there now. This was the last place he would have picked for a morning-after encounter. He’d come looking for her, but now he had more immediate concerns.

Jackson eyed the ax and the pile of logs. “I thought we agreed you were going to leave the wood chopping to me, Gramps.”

Walter glared at him. “You’re already running my business. Got to leave a man something to do.”

“There’s plenty to do.” He was treading a delicate path between ensuring his grandfather felt involved and not giving him anything too strenuous.

“Then go and do it and leave me to talk to Kayla about Snow Crystal.”

Lack of sleep added weight to the responsibilities already pressing down on his shoulders.

“I need to talk to you about the restaurant, Gramps.”

“If you’re here to tell me Darren has gone, I already know.”

Jackson cursed himself for not speaking to his grandfather immediately. “He came to you?” Anger flared at the thought of Darren bringing an eighty-year-old man in on the problem.

“Two minutes after he walked out. Came straight over here, ranting about that ‘French bitch.’ Excuse me.” Walter sent a look of apology to Kayla, who tightened her grip on the ax as if she was contemplating bringing it down on someone’s head.

“Don’t worry. But I might just need to chop another log soon.”

“Me, too. I’m steaming mad. Some folks don’t know when they’re well off—that’s the problem.” He glared at Jackson, who prepared to do something he never did. Explain his decision.

“I know you took him on, Gramps—”

“Yes, I did. And I reminded him of that when I sent him on his way.”

“You—” Braced for a different conversation, Jackson stopped in midsentence. “You did what?”

“I sent him on his way, of course.” Walter took the ax from Kayla. “I told him to grow a backbone, get himself right back in the kitchen and do the job we employed him to do.” He took a swing. The ax landed with a thud, leaving another two logs to add to the growing pile.

Kayla nodded approval. “Nice one, Walter.”

Jackson wasn’t sure whether she was referring to Darren or the split log. “I’m assuming he refused.”

“He did. Said he already had a better job lined up. Need a turn, Kayla?”

“Yes.” She took the ax back while Jackson watched the two of them, noticing the way his grandfather gently adjusted Kayla’s grip and then positioned the next log for her.

She hit him with her smile and Walter stepped back, dazzled.

Having been on the receiving end of that smile, Jackson felt sympathy for his grandfather.

He watched as she lifted the ax. Watched as that blond hair swung and a look of determination spread across her face.

Apart from that first glance, she hadn’t looked at him.

“I’m going to find a way to chop logs in my office. That way every time a client with no story whatsoever tells me he wants to be on the front page of the
New York Times,
I can chop a log instead of banging my head against a wall.” She split the log and her eyes sparkled. “You do this whenever you’re stressed?”

“Every damn day.” Walter glanced at his grandson. “Never any shortage of firewood around here. Isn’t that right, Jackson?”

“Gramps—”

Walter grunted. “You did the right thing. People need to pull their weight. Élise cooks like an angel. She was a find, that’s for sure.”

It was the first word of praise his grandfather had given him. The first time he’d shown any indication that any of the changes Jackson had made were making a difference.

“I didn’t expect Darren to leave.”

“Things happen. You dealt with it. That’s all you can do in life. Things are changing around here. If people can’t change along with us, they’d be happier somewhere else. It’s important to keep these logs dry.” He spoke to Kayla. “We deliver dry logs to the cabins every day. Sure, only a couple of them are occupied right now, but I’m sure that’ll change now you’re here. Think you can get us on the front page of the
New York Times?
” His eyes twinkled and Kayla grinned back at him.

“Doubtful. You’re hot, Walter, but even you’re not hot enough for the front page. But I can get you in other places. If I arrange for a journalist to interview you, do you promise not to eat him in one mouthful?”

Walter rested his foot on the log. “I’m not allowed to be myself?”

“I want you to be yourself. I’m relying on it.”

He put the ax down. “Just tell me who you want me to talk to.”

“I’ll make some calls.”

Jackson frowned. “This close to Christmas?”

“There are people still working, and some of them are looking for stories that don’t include suggestions for cooking turkey or tips on dieting. I’ll get right onto it.” She zipped up her jacket, still not looking at him.

“I’m taking you skiing this morning. We’re meeting up with Tyler and Jess. Your gear is in the back of my car.”

“These are two people whose idea of fun is to bomb down a sheer vertical cliff. I’m sure they’re just dying to spend time on a flat slope with someone who can’t stay upright for more than five seconds.” Her voice was falsely bright. “I’m glad they’re bonding, but I need to get back to the cabin and work. I’m starting to get a clear picture of how we can sell Snow Crystal to the press and the public.”

He was starting to get a clear picture of the reason she blocked people out of her life. “You can tell me about it as we drive.” He took her arm. “Car’s parked just over there. See you later, Gramps.”

“I guess you will.” Walter gave them both a long look but Jackson kept walking. Fortunately Kayla did, too, presumably because she didn’t want a scene.

“I had a frank discussion with your grandfather.”

“Good. A frank discussion is definitely needed. And not just between you and my grandfather.” He heard her sharp intake of breath.

“Jackson—”

“Get in the car, Kayla.” They were the same words he’d spoken to her a few nights earlier when she’d fled from the meeting, only this time he understood more about why she’d fled. He hoped she wasn’t going to argue, because he was ready to flatten her to the side of his SUV and kiss her until she stopped arguing, which would give Walter something to stare at other than his log pile.

“You employed me to do a job.”

“I’m not stopping you doing that job. I’d like an update, and I’d like that update with strong coffee to make up for the amount we didn’t sleep last night. Right now we’re going to use this private time to have that conversation you’ve been avoiding.”

She climbed into the car. “I had things to do this morning.”

“Things that required you to creep out like a burglar?”

“I was trying not to wake you.”

“Yeah, I got that part. Question is, why? Am I that scary?”

“I was busy. I spoke to your mother. I had a conversation with Élise and Brenna. I had a lovely chat with Walter.” She fastened her seat belt. “That was what we agreed, wasn’t it? That I’d talk to people?”

“Seems you’ve talked to just about everyone except me so far today.”

She took a deep breath. “It was one night, Jackson. Just one night.”

“In that case you owe me a couple of hours because you walked out before it was finished.” He waited for her to come back with a smart reply.

What she did was turn the conversation back to work.

“I’ve decided to go for some feature placements and national TV. People like a human story.”

He reined in frustration. “Human story?”

“You gave up your own dream to come home and save the family business.”

Tension rippled through him. “You make it sound like some sort of damn sacrifice.”

“Would you have come home and run this place if your father were still here?”

“He isn’t, so it isn’t a question that needs answering.” The snap in his voice was directed at himself rather than her, but she had no way of knowing that. He was about to apologize when he felt the gentle touch of her fingers on his thigh.

Remembering how those fingers had felt wrapped around a certain part of him, Jackson almost drove off the road.

“I’m sorry.” Her voice was soft. “I didn’t mean to be insensitive.”

“I’m the one who’s sorry. I’m tired and cranky and right now I don’t want to talk about this place.” He tried to focus on the road and not the touch of her hand. “And I’m not sure Walter should be talking to journalists. I don’t want the world to know he doesn’t want me here.”

“He wants you here. I spent an hour with him this morning. You’re all he talks about and he talks with love and pride.”

“Family loyalty. He’s not going to say anything different to—”

“To an outsider. It’s fine...you can say it. And he’s proud of you, Jackson. You have no idea how lucky you are to have that.” She withdrew her hand and he had to stop himself from grabbing it. Instead he kept both hands on the wheel and steered the vehicle into the parking area at the foot of the chairlift.

“I should have come home sooner.” Guilt gnawed at him, aching under his ribs. “Should have asked some questions. My father was a lousy businessman. He considered a day that wasn’t spent outdoors trying to break his speed record flying downhill a day wasted.”

“He sounds like Tyler.”

“There are similarities, but Tyler loves Snow Crystal. To Dad it was a boulder around his neck stopping him doing the things he wanted to do.” He wondered why they were talking about this when all he wanted to do was talk about the night before.

He wondered how she could block it out so easily.

And then he saw her fingers. She was clenching them in her lap, her knuckles white, and he knew she wasn’t finding it easy, either.

“I’ve been thinking that we should invite some of the top international ski journalists for a weekend.”

He ought to be interested. He should be listening to her words, not looking at her mouth. “We?”

“You.” She leaned forward to remove her boots. “I’ll be in New York, obviously.”

He swore under his breath. “Look at me, Kayla.”

“I think it would be an excellent way of getting coverage and—”

“Look at me.”

“I’m just—”

“You’re just trying to pretend last night never happened, but I’m not going to let you do that.”

Color streaked across her cheekbones but she kept her eyes down. “It happened, but now it’s done.”

“No, it’s not.”

She stilled and took several breaths. “You are already the longest relationship I’ve ever had, Jackson.”

“Maybe I am, but that doesn’t mean you have to run.” It was what she’d done after her parents had split up. It broke his heart to think of her shivering and alone on Christmas night.

He thought about what she’d told him about her life. Adding those pieces to the other bits she’d revealed over the time they’d been together had enabled him to build a picture in his head and it didn’t make happy viewing.

She adjusted her socks. “I’m not running.”

“I woke up alone.”

“I took Maple back to your mother.”

“At seven in the morning?” He slid his fingers under her chin and forced her to look at him. “Am I that scary?”

“I’m not scared.”

“Sweetheart, you’re so scared intruder alarms go off in your head when someone comes close. There are better ways to live your life.”

“This way works for me.”

Exasperation flashed through him. She was more stubborn than Walter. “Don’t trust, don’t get hurt—is that right?”

“Maybe it is, but what’s wrong with that? I’m only here for a few days. This can’t be—anything.”

“So we can either play it safe and boring, or we can make those few days count.” His gaze dropped to her mouth. “I know which I want.”

“Jackson—”

“I don’t remember you checking your emails, Kayla.” He could see a tiny pulse beating in her throat.

“Enough. You need to back off.”

“I’m not good at backing off. That’s why I’m still at Snow Crystal.”

But he understood why she would think that way. Her most important relationships had proved as unstable and unreliable as the snowpack on a steep slope. One moment she’d been standing on what had felt like a solid surface and the next that surface had gone, sweeping her off the mountain in an avalanche of pain that had left her living in a world where nothing felt secure.

He tried to imagine how it must feel to know your parents had chosen a different life. A life that didn’t include the child they’d made.

Family life could be messy—he knew that. Tyler’s experience with Janet Carpenter had been harsh, and the O’Neils certainly weren’t perfect. Much of the time they drove him half-crazy, but they were his family and they were
there.
Yes, there were arguments. Big, door-slamming arguments. Hell, in Tyler’s case the arguments had driven him from Snow Crystal for a while. And Sean wasn’t exactly rushing home, either, but no one in the O’Neil family had ever doubted they were loved. The arguments, the irritations, the frustrations all added up to a package he couldn’t imagine living without.

And one thing he knew for sure—no one in his family would have spent Christmas night at a police station.

He’d left home because he’d craved independence. He’d wanted,
needed,
to prove himself. But he’d always known he could return at any point. He’d known they had his back and that if life had buried him in an avalanche, they’d be right there digging him out. And he would have done the same for any one of them, which was why he was here now.

Kayla had never had that support from anyone.

She’d had only herself to rely on, with no support from the sidelines. For her, security came from not taking risks in her personal life.

He took it as a positive sign that her guard was up. It meant she felt threatened. And feeling threatened meant she cared.

Presumably she’d work that out for herself if she hadn’t already.

Jackson decided to let that kick around in her brain for a while.

“I’m glad we had this talk because now we both know where we stand. Let’s go and break the news to Tyler you want him to be a media star.”