Simply Voracious (8 page)

After their celebratory family dinner, her mother had bidden Paul a fond farewell and followed her daughter upstairs to her bedroom. Lucky already had a headache, and her mother’s happy exuberance was not making her feel any better. Every time she opened her mouth she felt like she was deceiving her parents and Paul anew.

Paul had been magnificent during dinner, holding her hand and smiling down at her as if she truly were the woman he adored and wanted to marry. He’d also deflected most of her mother’s questions as to the progress of their romance, suggesting adroitly that his regard for Lucky had simply grown through the years until he had been unable to deny his feelings for her.

“Lucinda.” Her mother sat down on the bed and patted the space beside her, her smile disappearing. “I am listening to you. I don’t understand why you have agreed to marry Paul at all.”

Lucky stared at her mother. “What?”

“I’m not stupid, my dear. Did you think to please your father?”

Lucky shook her head. “No, it wasn’t like that at all. I . . .”

“Then why?” Her mother frowned. “Paul is a lovely man, and I know he will take good care of you and the estate, but why have you settled for him? I always thought you more adventurous than that.”

Lucky sat down next to her mother and took her hand. She had to see this through. She had to find the strength to convince her mother that she was happy with her choice, for all their sakes.

“I don’t think I’m settling, Mama. Paul is wonderful.”

Something flickered in her mother’s eyes. “Paul is not as sweet and uncomplicated as he might seem.”

“What man is?” Lucky answered. “At least we are good friends and intend to discuss all these potential problems before we go ahead with the marriage.”

Her mother sighed. “Make sure you do. I would hate for you to be miserable in your marriage.”

Lucky forced a laugh. “I don’t think Paul would ever want to make me miserable. He’s always been so kind to me.”

“That is true. I just hope you make the right decision, my love.”

Lucky kissed her mother’s scented cheek. “I know I have. Carry on being happy for me, please?”

“Of course I will. There will be no prouder mother around than I am. I’ll boast about your conquest at every social event for years!”

Lucky wrapped her arms around her mother and hugged her tight. “Thank you, Mama. I love you so much,” she whispered.

“And I love you too. Now go to sleep and be prepared for your whole life to change tomorrow. We’ll need to start on that trousseau right away.”

Lucky raised her head. “I won’t have to have a big wedding, will I?”

“You can’t have a big wedding. We’re still in mourning for the last duke, remember?”

“Oh good,” Lucky said thankfully. “I mean, that’s right. I don’t think either of us would relish a huge fashionable crush. Maybe we can have something small and private instead.”

“If we organized a huge society wedding, Paul would probably run away.” Her mother kissed her nose. “However, we still have plenty of time to make you look beautiful; don’t worry about that.”

Lucinda got off the bed and allowed her mother to loosen the back of her gown and her stays. There was at least one memory she could share with her mother that was quite sincere.

“I know you won’t believe me, Mama, but ever since I was a little girl, whenever I pictured my wedding day, Paul was standing beside me.”

Her mother headed for the door. “Then perhaps you have made the right choice after all.” She paused to look back at Lucky. “If, perhaps, for all the wrong reasons. Good night, my love.”

Lucky waited until her mother had left before sinking down into the nearest chair and covering her face with her hands.

7

From the moment he saw Lucky being greeted by the hostess at the ball, Paul guessed she was already quite close to reneging on their arrangement. He wasn’t even surprised. Expecting her to keep deceiving those she loved under such difficult circumstances would be hard for anyone, let alone a sheltered twenty-one-year-old who had probably never lied to her parents about anything before.

Before he went to claim her hand for the first waltz, Paul took the opportunity to study her from afar. She wore a light blue silk gown with blond lace trimming, which only accentuated the paleness of her complexion. Her dark hair fell in a cascade of ringlets from the crown of her head, and her blue eyes looked enormous. She stood tall though, her bearing suitable to her high rank and her manner daring anyone to contradict her about anything. A sense of pride consumed Paul. She was indeed much stronger than she looked, and he was certain that she would grow into a remarkable woman.

Despite the fact that there had been no formal announcement of the upcoming engagement, Paul could already sense the undercurrent of interest that swirled around him as he approached the Haymores. He wasn’t known for regular appearances at social gatherings, and it was possible that the duchess had already whispered the news to a few chosen friends.

His aunt held out her hand and he kissed it. “How lovely to see you, Paul. Have you come to dance with Lucinda?”

“Indeed I have, Aunt.” He turned to Lucky, who was still looking rather apprehensive. “If she is willing.”

She gave him her gloved hand and he tucked it into the crook of his arm and walked her toward the dance floor. The orchestra struck a chord, and he took her into his arms, amazed at how fragile she felt and how light she was on her feet.

“Are you well, Lucky?”

She looked up at him. “I’m not sure.”

He kept his social smile pinned in place. “Do you want to stop dancing? I can take you back to your mother.”

“No, I’d rather dance.”

She returned her gaze to his shirtfront and refused to look up again, replying to all his efforts at conversation with the smallest of smiles and the shortest of replies.

After a while he tried again. “Lucky, what is going on?”

“I’m not sure what you mean.”

“If you wish people to think that we are so attracted to each other that we intend to marry posthaste, you might want to smile at me a little more.”

She sighed. “I’m sorry, Paul. I’m not feeling too well tonight.”

“Then let me take you back to your mother.” He stopped dancing and began to lead her back across the dance floor until she pulled at his hand.

“Can you take me somewhere not quite so unbearably hot?”

Paul glanced around and changed direction, bringing her toward the open floor-length windows that looked out on to the balcony. He found Lucky a chair and sat opposite her.

“Is that better?” He took the ivory fan out of her unresisting fingers, opened it, and started fanning her.

“Much.” She glanced back through the window at the dancing couples. “Are we all right being out here?”

“As we’re going to be married, I would hope so.”

“As to that . . .”

Paul tensed as she stared at him. “You wish to break it off already?”

“No. It’s just that everything is far more complicated that I realized. By trying to avoid my fate, I’ve simply exchanged one set of problems for another.”

Paul stopped fanning her. “Not quite. I’m not a money-grubbing bastard who forced himself on you to get his hands on your father’s fortune.”

She gaped at him. “I wasn’t comparing you to him at all!”

“Well, that’s what it sounded like.” He realized he was glaring at her in a most unlover-like way. “Has he approached you again since we last spoke?”

“No, he hasn’t, thank goodness.”

“Is he here?”

She hesitated. “I doubt he has the necessary pedigree to enter this particular gathering. To be honest, I didn’t even think about him being here. I was waiting for you.”

He felt himself relax. “A wise decision, but let me know if you see him and I’ll get rid of him for you. Is that really what is worrying you?”

“
Everything
is worrying me. Even my mother is suspicious of my choice.”

“The duchess?” Paul blinked. “She’s always been one of my greatest champions.”

“But I’m her only surviving daughter. She wants me to be as happy in my marriage as she is in hers.”

“And she doesn’t think I’ll make you happy?”

Lucky reached out and patted his knee. “I told her that you would never want to hurt me.”

“Then why was she concerned?”

Lucky shrugged. “Oh, she thought I might be marrying you to please my father. She has no idea that I’m marrying you to prevent him from hearing the worst of me.”

Not deceived by her light tone, Paul regarded her for a long moment. He’d always wondered exactly what the duke and duchess had heard about his wild past and his current sexual activities. “You can still tell him the truth, Lucky. That really would be the simplest thing to do.”

She set her mouth in an obstinate line that he was coming to know very well. “But I’m not a child anymore. I can’t expect everyone to solve my problems for me. It’s bad enough that I have to involve you.”

Paul held her gaze. “Lucky, involving me was the most intelligent thing you’ve done so far.”

“I know that.” She smiled at him. “I think I’m all right now. Shall we go back in? I suspect we’ve given the gossips plenty to talk about for the rest of the night.”

Paul stood and took her hand. “I’ll come and take you out tomorrow so that we can converse more comfortably.”

“That would be lovely.”

He took both her hands in his. “Just remember there is no right or wrong way here. There is only what we choose to do and how we choose to do it. No one can make us feel bad about that except ourselves.”

She pulled out of his grasp and patted his cheek. “I never knew you were quite so profound, Paul.”

Neither had Paul until he started wanting to make everything right for her. It was a strange feeling, being the responsible one, the one everyone was depending on. He’d avoided that all his life, but now it seemed he had no choice but to see this most important matter through.

He walked back with Lucky to her mother and spent a pleasant few minutes conversing with the duke and duchess before heading off to the card room. There was no sign of Constantine, and Paul wasn’t sure if that made things better or worse. Earlier he’d heard someone mention that Con had been seen in the company of Major Thomas Wesley, another patron of the pleasure house and a particular friend of Lord and Lady Blaize Minshom. He tried to be glad that Con would have a sympathetic ear, but the thought of Wesley offering anything of a more tender nature to his lover made him furious.

He stopped at the entrance of the card room so abruptly that several men ran into him. Con wasn’t his anymore. After apologizing, Paul turned back toward the ballroom and the doors that led back to the hallway below. He’d only come for Lucky’s sake, and, as it seemed that her despoiler was not present, perhaps he might go and drown his sorrows at his lodging house in the company of Captain David Grey and his lover, Robert. They at least might be able to stop him from falling into a pit of self-made despair.

When Milly drew the curtains the next morning to the sound of rain hammering on the panes, Lucky’s first reaction was to huddle back under the sheets and stay there for the remainder of the day. But she was a duke’s daughter, and she had to accompany her mother to several establishments that morning that dealt with clothes for her trousseau. If society hadn’t guessed that she and Paul were now engaged, the gossip from the various shops would probably convince them.

Lucky yawned and sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the high bed. A wave of black giddiness swept over her, and she had to clutch on to the bedpost for support.

“Are you all right, miss?”

Lucky breathed through her nose until the nausea subsided and the world stopped spinning cartwheels, and then carefully let go of the bedpost. She knew enough about what happened to women who were breeding to be afraid. She could not swoon now; her maid would almost certainly run for the duchess, and Lucky had no desire to speak to her mother at this moment at all.

Milly was already moving around the room, assembling Lucky’s shift, stays, and petticoats. She turned to point out the stockings that hung over the back of a chair.

“Sit down and put those on, miss.”

Lucky was quite glad to take the chair and bend to her task. By the time she straightened, she felt far more the thing and was able to finish dressing in a warm gown and make her way down to breakfast.

Her mother greeted her with a bright smile and a list of errands that seemed to stretch for longer than a week. Lucky ate some toast and drank her tea while her mother talked and planned and asked questions she didn’t really require the answers for.

By the time they were ready to leave the house, it was still raining, and Parsons protected their bonneted heads with a large umbrella. Lucky stared out of the small window as the ducal coach made its slow way through the always crowded streets of central London.

The duchess consulted her list. “I think we’ll start at the lending library first, as it is closest, and it will be less busy at this time in the morning.”

“Of course, Mama,” Lucky replied.

“You are being remarkably biddable this morning, my dear, and you look remarkably cheerful. Can it be that you are looking forward to marrying Paul after all?”

“Of
course
I am looking forward to it.” Lucky smiled at her mother. “I could scarcely sleep last night thinking about all the arrangements that need to be made.”

Her mother chuckled. “Well, don’t worry about that. Your father and I will take care of the details. All you have to do is choose your new dresses and all the other things a young bride needs.” She hesitated. “I must confess that the thought of you being comfortably settled with Paul does stop me from worrying about all the fortune hunters circling around you.”

Lucky kept smiling. There was no point in telling her mother that she’d already been caught and ruined by one of those very vultures. “I’m sure there is much more for me to help you with than that, Mama,” Lucky said. “I’m quite capable.”

“I know that, and I’ll be asking your opinion on everything. Do not worry.”