Simply Forbidden (22 page)

Gabriel felt as if a hundred pairs of eyes were staring at him accusingly and wanted to turn tail. He’d deliberately chosen not to confront his ex-army comrades in the past, but now he had no choice. Lisette’s honor was far more important than his cowardice. He refused to have her name sullied.

“Is that you, Swanfield?”

He looked up to see an older, shorter man with a bushy mustache staring down at him. “Good evening, Walsh.”

Walsh looked around the room and deliberately raised his voice. “I’m surprised you dared show your face in here.”

“Really? Why is that?”

“Because there are probably men here who lost comrades and even family because of your perfidy.”

Paul cleared his throat. “Nothing was ever proven against Lord Swanfield.”

“Only because he was too damn important to stand trial.”

A small group gathered around their table and Gabriel felt suffocated. Lieutenant Walsh had never liked him, so it was hardly surprising he was the first to attack. Gabriel maintained his pleasant expression. “I offered to stand trial, but I was refused the chance. Someone decided I should be sent home.”

“That’s not what I heard.” Walsh scoffed. “A close friend of yours told me that you faked your injuries and your illness simply to avoid being shot.”

Gabriel slowly stood up so that everyone could see the scars on his face. “I faked nothing. I spent several months in a French prison and barely escaped with my life.”

Paul rose, too, and faced the growing crowd. “And I can personally vouch for Lord Swanfield, seeing as we spent those months in the same godforsaken hole.”

Walsh’s color rose and he started to bluster. “You still shouldn’t be here.”

“I think he should.” Walsh fell silent as another man pushed his way through the crowd. His prematurely white hair gleamed in the candlelight. His eyes were the pale silver of a wolf.

Gabriel found himself saluting. “Sir.”

His immediate superior officer, Lieutenant Colonel Con-stantine Delinsky, nodded at him. “It’s good to see you again, Swanfield.”

“It’s good to see you, too, sir.”

“I had hoped to meet you before this, but on your return from Spain, you seemed to disappear.”

“I was … unwell for a long time, sir.”

“So I should imagine.” Delinsky turned to face the other men. His slight Russian accent was soft but still commanded the attention of everyone. “It might interest you to know that my younger brother, Francis, was imprisoned with Major Swanfield and Lieutenant St. Clare.”

His thoughtful gaze raked over Walsh. “My brother told me that during his time in the prison, Swanfield stopped his fellow prisoners behaving like animals, forced them to share their rations and water, and reminded them that they were still representing their King and Country.” He paused for a long moment. “That does not sound to me like the kind of man who would betray his fellow officers.”

Silence fell around them and Gabriel met Delinsky’s silver gaze. “Your brother was an example to the other men, sir. He never despaired and was, in truth, one of the men responsible for our successful escape.”

“That is correct. A breakout that nearly succeeded in bringing about your death, Swanfield, as I understand you insisted on bringing up the rear and making sure that everyone, including the wounded, got out.”

Walsh cleared his throat and glanced around at his supporters. “With all due respect, Delinsky. If this were true, how is it that nothing was known about it at the time?”

“Oh, it was known about. The authorities simply chose not to believe it.” Delinsky’s idle gaze scanned the assembled company. “A matter which I have fought to have put right for many years.”

He held out his hand. “I, for one, am delighted to welcome Swanfield as a member of this club. If anyone disagrees, please feel free to express your concerns directly to me. I don’t wish to disturb Swanfield’s evening any longer.”

The gathering dispersed, leaving Gabriel still standing, one
hand clenched at his side, the other just touching the edge of the table simply to feel something solid and real. Constantine Delinsky sat down and gestured for Gabriel and Peter to do the same. He leaned back to allow a waiter to pour them all a brandy.

“If you are established in Town now, Swanfield, may I bring my mother and brother to pay their respects?”

“Of course, sir.” Gabriel responded instinctively, his nerves jangling, the desire to leave still pulsing through his veins. “I’m at Swanfield House on Portman Square.”

“I know it well. I have an aunt who lives on the same square.” Delinsky sat forward. “What made you decide to finally breach these potentially unforgiving walls?”

Gabriel stared into his former commanding officer’s eyes and saw nothing but interest and the desire to help. “In truth, not for my own benefit. I have recently married and I’ve heard that gossip about my reputation, or lack of it, is being superseded by gossip about my wife.”

“Ah. Would that be the former Miss Delornay-Ross?”

Gabriel sat up straight. “Yes.”

“I know both her parents quite well, and I met Miss Ross during her, um, ‘wilder’ days.” Delinsky smiled and Gabriel wanted to bare his teeth and growl. “Like you, in my opinion, her reputation was greatly exaggerated. I found her charming, but utterly devoted to that preening idiot Lord Nash.”

Gabriel let out his breath. He would’ve hated to have to punch Delinsky after all the good work he’d done for him that night, but Lisette was his wife.

Delinsky frowned. “If someone
is
gossiping about Miss Ross it probably has something to do with Nash. He’s never learned to keep his damn mouth shut.” He nodded at Swanfield and got to his feet. “I’ll let you know if I hear anything.”

Gabriel stood, too. “Thank you, sir. Thank you for everything.”

Delinsky paused to look back at him. “I did nothing but tell the truth. If you’d come and found me after I returned to England, I would’ve been glad to have offered you my help.”

“I didn’t think I needed it—until now, sir. But I thank you all the same.” Gabriel hesitated. “Do you know a Major Lord Thomas Wesley?”

“I believe I’ve heard of him.” Delinsky considered Gabriel for a long moment. “Should I know him?”

Paul answered for Gabriel. “He is investigating the allegations about Major Swanfield’s conduct in Spain, sir. I’m sure he’d be delighted to hear from you and your brother.”

Delinsky turned to Paul and saluted before nodding at Gabriel. “Thank you for the information, and I hope to see you both again soon.”

“Thank you, sir,” Gabriel said and sat down rather abruptly as Delinsky turned away. Paul shoved his brandy glass back into his hand.

“I think we’ll be all right here now. Delinsky is one of the founding members of this club. If he offers you membership, I doubt anyone else will disagree with him.”

“That’s good, I think.” Gabriel tried to gather his scattered wits. “Does
everyone
know Lisette?”

Paul grinned. “She is rather memorable, Gabriel.”

“So it seems.”

“I didn’t mean that in a negative way at all,” Paul said hastily. “She is very charming.”

“I know.” Gabriel grimaced and finished off his brandy in one swallow. “Now how can I stop the gossip about her without further damaging her reputation?”

“The best thing to do would be to track down the cause of the gossip and shut it off at its source. Lord Nash seems to be the obvious person to pursue.”

“Indeed. Perhaps we should concentrate on meeting him in
private to convince him to keep his lurid speculations to himself?”

“We?” Paul asked.

“You aren’t going to come with me?”

Paul sighed. “You make it damn difficult for me to refuse.”

“I’m not being fair, am I?” Gabriel asked abruptly. “I’ve told you repeatedly that I’m not interested in having a relationship with you, yet I still expect you to jump every time I snap my fingers.”

Paul’s mouth twitched. “I’m not quite that desperate, Gabriel. I do have some self-respect, you know.”

“Paul …”

His friend grinned at him. “I’m only joking. Now if you were to get down on your knees and start begging me, I might be persuaded to believe you cared.”

Gabriel chose to say nothing, signaled the waiter to bring them more brandy, and settled back in his seat to watch the door. He’d enjoyed being on his knees to both men and women at the pleasure house and knew he’d still enjoy watching Paul come for him. His cock twitched and thickened in his breeches. God, would his perverse desires never leave him? He’d assumed that by finding the perfect woman he would be able to forget such strange aberrations, but the thought of Paul aroused him….

“I think it’s time to go home.”

“Are you sure? We’ve hardly been here an hour.”

Gabriel shrugged. “After all the excitement tonight, I doubt our prey will appear, do you? We’ll come back another night.”

Paul stretched and yawned. “You’re probably right. Let’s go. I’ll let you know when I find a good time and place to talk to Lord Nash.”

“That would be excellent.” Gabriel threw some coins onto the table for the brandy and headed for the door. He didn’t
want Paul too close to him at this moment. His friend knew all his moods far too intimately not to notice the swelling in Gabriel’s breeches and possibly realize he was the cause of it. And that would never do. Those days were long behind him.

He settled his hat on his head and mounted Wellington. His wife was at home and he knew that she would be more than willing to indulge his most outrageous sexual requests. An image of Paul sucking his cock while he licked Lisette’s sex seared through his mind and made him tighten the reins until Wellington bucked in protest.

Where in God’s name had that come from? Gabriel stared blindly into the night sky, willing both his imagination and his erection to the devil. He’d never share Lisette with anyone. He kicked the horse into a fast trot and headed for home, even as an even more insidious thought invaded his consciousness. He might not be willing to share Lisette, but would she be willing to share him?

“W
hat are you doing in here?”

Lisette opened her eyes to find Gabriel looming over her and the fire beside her almost out. She yawned delicately behind her hand and drew her thick wool shawl closer to her breasts.

“Waiting for you.”

“Here?” Gabriel flung out his hand in a disdainful gesture that included the whole of his gloomy bedchamber.

“I was bored and it occurred to me that I hadn’t seen this room, so I came in and chatted with Keyes while he set things to rights.”

“And you didn’t leave.” Gabriel discarded his coat and waistcoat and tugged at his cravat until he could slip the still-tied knot over his head.

Lisette frowned up at him as he dropped his clothes onto the floor. “I’ll leave now if you are going to be so unwelcoming.”

He took off his boots, unbuttoned his breeches, and pulled his shirt free. “I thought you would be asleep.”

“You were home earlier than I anticipated.” She studied him carefully. “Is something wrong?”

He sat down on the side of the bed to push down his breeches and underthings and she couldn’t help but notice he was erect.

“Where did you say you were going?”

“To a gentleman’s club that Lieutenant St. Clare belongs to.”

Lisette sat up and allowed the shawl to slip down to her waist. “And how
was
Paul?”

“He was well. Why do you ask?”

Lisette raised her eyebrows and stared at his groin until he wrapped a hand around his shaft as if to protect himself from her gaze.

“What?”

“Lieutenant St. Clare is very fond of you, isn’t he?”

“Aye, we were held captive together in Spain.”

“All men together and no women.”

He shot her a wary glance. “That’s what prisons are usually like. Occasionally one of us was brought out and cleaned up so that the ladies and gents of the town could experience what it was like to fuck or abuse an Englishman secured to a bed in chains.” His mouth curled in disgust. “But that was an exception. Most of the men were too sick or repulsive to be seen above ground.”

“But you were used like that?”

“Yes.”

“And you didn’t mind?”

“Anything that meant a break from the horrors of that damn cesspit we inhabited was welcome.”

Lisette shivered at the darkness of his expression. “But generally you were stuck in the cell with other men and principally Paul St. Clare.”

“He saved my life the first night I was there, and I protected him in return.” A muscle flicked on his cheek as he continued to contemplate the floorboards. “A bond like that is hard to break.”

“I’m sure it is.” Lisette considered him. “Exactly how close were you?”

Gabriel slowly raised his head and met her gaze, his blue eyes full of memories. “Close.”

Lisette got up and strolled across to Gabriel, watched him slowly straighten as she stopped in front of him. “Close enough to be lovers?”

“Yes.”

“And he still wants you.”

Gabriel shrugged. “That is none of your business.”

“That is true.” She leaned in and ran her fingers over the curve of his hip and down toward his half-erect cock and balls. “What is my business, however, is whether you still want him.”

He swallowed hard, his voice husky. “Why would you think that?”

She flicked the hard wet tip of his cock with her fingertip. “Because of this?”

He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. “I told you once that when we married I would never stray.”

“I assumed you meant with a woman.”

He nipped at the soft pad of flesh just beneath her thumb, then licked the pain away. “I don’t need anyone but you.”

She drew her hand out of his grasp. “You don’t sound very sure. Would you like it if I allowed you to have male lovers?”

He sighed. “That’s not fair, Lisette.”

“Not fair of me to offer you what you want?”

He caught her hands and brought her hard against him. “I want you, I want this marriage, and I want our children.” His mouth met hers and suddenly there was no breath left in her lungs for speaking. She wrapped her arms around his neck and stepped between his legs, felt the thick heat of his shaft rub and catch against the linen of her nightgown.

Before he could stop her, she dropped down onto her knees, drew his cock deep into her mouth, and sucked him hard. He started to groan, one hand fisted in her hair as she worked him. Even as his hips bucked and he ground himself against her, she
couldn’t help wondering if he was thinking of Paul St. Clare doing this to him. Would a man feel different? Would his strength make it harder for Gabriel to resist the need to come?

She opened her eyes and looked up at him. His expression was one of pure lust, his features locked and straining, his lower lip caught between his teeth as she sucked him. She slid her left hand over his buttock and delved between his legs, stroking the tender skin between his balls and his arse until he groaned her name. With her right hand she gripped the base of his cock and slowly withdrew her mouth from him.

“Do you wish Paul was here kneeling in my place?”

His eyes flew open and he stared down at her. “What?”

She circled the puckered bud of his arse hole and inserted the tip of her wet finger inside him. “Do you wish I was Paul?”

“No, damn you, I …”

She worked his cock through the tight grip of her fingers until his pre-cum ran over her fingers, and she shoved the finger in his arse deeper. “Are you sure?” She kissed his cock, let him see her tongue circle the crown and probe the slit. He tried to thrust upward, but she held him captive. “How about both of us?”

“God …” His pupils dilated so widely that almost all the blue in his eyes disappeared and he came all over her hand. She watched him climax feeling strangely detached and removed her hands from him.

“Good night, my lord.”

He reached for her. “Don’t go, not like this, not when I haven’t explained….”

She kept moving. It was her own fault after all; she’d asked him and he’d only told her the truth. He caught her as she reached the door and held onto her upper arms.

“Listen to me,” he said urgently. “What I used to want and what I want now are two different things. You caught me at a vulnerable moment, but I’m a changed man. I promise you that
you have nothing to worry about. I’ll be in your bed and your bed alone.”

She made herself look up at him. “I’m not sure I believe you.”

“Why not?”

She sighed. “It’s not that simple, Gabriel, is it? We can’t change who we are or what we want.”

He glared down at her. “Yes, we can.”

“So we are going to become the perfect society couple who make an appointment to have sex and don’t enjoy it at all?”

“It doesn’t have to be quite like that, Lisette, but we will certainly be more conventional.”

“Oh.”

He kissed her nose. “I know you want that.”

“To be more conventional?”

“Of course you do. After your upbringing I’m beginning to understand that a solid, unadventurous marriage and a respectable husband are exactly what you need and exactly what I am going to provide for you.”

She stepped out of his arms. “Do you realize how pompous and arrogant that makes you sound?”

“Why?” He shrugged, his muscled skin gleaming in the soft candlelight. “I know you, Lisette. I know what you want.”

“Strange that, when I’m not even sure if
I
know what I want.”

“You want me.”

She studied him as she backed up toward the door. “I’m married to you.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Gabriel roared.

She slipped through the door of the dressing room, picked up her nightgown, and ran for the other door that led into her bedroom. Of course he followed her. She must know him well enough to realize he was hardly going to walk away from a challenge like that. She gasped as he tugged her nightgown over her head and brought her against his naked body, his hands
roaming her flesh, cupping her buttocks, bringing her up on her toes to crush her against his rapidly expanding cock.

“You think our marriage bed will be boring?” He kissed her mouth, her throat, the curve of her ear; felt her breath catch as he lifted her and deposited her onto the bed on her hands and knees. He bent over her, his teeth grazing her shoulder as he rubbed his now erect cock against her buttocks. “You think this will ever be boring?”

He thrust inside her, one arm wrapped around her hips to keep her where he wanted her and the other on the mattress to take his weight. He dragged his hand lower and spread his fingers wide, slid the longest up and down over her swollen clit until she was writhing and bucking under him and coming all around his cock.

He kept thrusting, fingering her clit until she was begging him for release, until she was so slippery and wet that he could barely find her bud. He held still as she climaxed again, looking down at his cock embedded in her cunt and picturing it elsewhere.

God, he wanted to fuck her arse, knew she liked it, wanted it so much he almost came thinking about it. He tried to breathe more slowly. “Do you have oil, Lisette?”

“What?” Her voice was muffled by the pillows. “In the drawer by my bed. My mother gave it to me.”

Gabriel reached out his right hand and connected with the bedside table, then fumbled his way down to the drawer and managed to open it. He retrieved the small glass vial of oil and poured some on his fingers. Lisette trembled when he stroked her puckered skin just above his cock and slowly inserted one well-oiled finger.

He kept his cock still and deep inside her as he worked her arse, adding more oiled fingers until he was moving four in and out of her. He bent to kiss her neck. “I want my cock in here, too. I want my cum all over you.”

He pulled out of her cunt and slowly eased his cock inside her arse, bracing his oiled fingers against the sheets. “Is this boring? Are you bored?”

She moaned his name as he began to move, loving the different, more unforgiving tightness of her arse. After ten strokes he was no longer being quite so careful. By twenty he was slamming into her and groaning with every thrust, fighting off his climax with every fiber of his being until he was simply focused on coming.

He grabbed her hand, settled it over her mound, and encouraged her to finger fuck herself while he fucked her arse. She moved with him, her breathing as ragged as his own, her body tightening and fighting around him as he strained for completion, lost all rhythm, and simply exploded into her, all his passion, all his ridiculous longing for Paul, all his love for Lisette combined in the shuddering wave of his release.

He sank down on her and held her tight, whispered into her ear, “Not boring. Not boring at all, love.” He didn’t hear her reply as he fell into a deep dreamless sleep.

Eventually Lisette managed to wiggle out from under Gabriel’s weight and claim a space in the bed for her own. She hadn’t been bored, but she was far more worried than she had been before. Everything seemed wrong. Her parents were acting as if she was some foolish seventeen-year-old debutante who needed to be protected from her own folly and Gabriel….

Gabriel was trying to turn them and their marriage into something they were not. She swallowed down an unacceptable desire to cry. What had happened to his oft-expressed opinion that she deserved to have choices? And what about the choices he was trying to make for himself just to keep her happy? None of it made sense and she wasn’t quite sure how to deal with it.

One thing was certain: she was no longer obliged to play by anybody’s rules but her own. She wasn’t a child and she wasn’t
Gabriel’s perfect wife either. Now all she had to do was decide exactly what she wanted and how to achieve her own happiness. It was the only way to convince everyone that she was capable of choosing her own destiny and creating her own life. Whatever happened, she was determined not to be told what to do by anyone ever again.