Side Chic (8 page)

“Alright, I see your point. I guess I did over react a little but you know Quan is the more sensitive one so I am a little more protective over him.”

I shook my head. “Well he is going to have to get out of that sensitive mess and toughen up! What he gone come home crying to you every time someone says something to him that he doesn’t like?” I asked her but didn’t wait for an answer. “I am raising little men not princesses!”

“Bae, he is only seven!”

“I am aware of that but he still isn’t about to be around here crying and whining all the time! You need to stop babying him so much. Don’t be making my son all soft and shit!”

She rolled her eyes. “Boy whatever!” She walked over and sat down on my lap. She kissed me, caressing my face. “Are we good now?”

I wrapped my arms around her
and smacked her on her ass
. “Yeah, we’re good.”

“I love
you
.”

“I love you too.”

She kissed me again. “Bae, I want you to know that I see the effort that you have been putting into our relationship lately and I want you to know that it is appreciated. You’ve been helping me out around the house more and spending more time with me and the boys. I don’t know what has gotten into you but I like it.”

I smiled, giving her thigh a light squeeze. “Nothing has gotten into me. I just love my family a lot and I want y’all to know it. I want you to know that even though I’ve done some fucked up things in the past. I appreciate you. You’ve stuck with my black ass when most women would’ve been packed their shit and left!”

“Yeah, we’ve been through a lot but every relationship has its ups and downs.
You’ve taken me through a lot and there were times when I did think about packing my shit and leaving but I couldn’t because I love you too much to walk away.” A tear rolled down her cheek and I wiped it away with my finger. “I’ve had people tell me that I was stupid for staying with you and putting up with your cheating. Those people don’t know what I feel in my heart
f
or you. Those people don’t know what I see when I look at you. They are on the outside looking in. They don’t know that times when my family turned their backs on me. You were here. I remember that time when I had pneumonia and thought that I was going to leave this world. You stuck by my side and took care of me. I remember hearing you pray asking God to please make me better because you couldn’t imagine having to live without me. It’s those things that made me sti
ck with you all of these years.”

Her little speech left me speechless. It wasn’t every day that we sat down and had a heart to heart. I knew that she loved me but hearing her break it down like this touched me in a special way. “Damn bae, you make a nigga want to let a few slide.” I kissed her. “Damn girl.”

She wiped her tears away and laughed. “Be quiet silly.” She hit me playfully on the arm.

Quan and Shaun burst into the room. “We finished eating!” They both announced.

“Alright, well I am going to run your bath water. One of you can take a bath in mama and daddy’s bathtub and the other one can take a bath in y’all tub.” I told them.

“I want to take my bath in here.” Quan replied.

“That’s cool with me.” I tapped Kisha and asked her to get up so that I could run the boys bath water.

“Well while you get them ready for their baths I am going to go in the living and finish reading my book.”  She left out of the room and I went into the bathroom and started running water in the tub for Quan. While his water was running I went across the hall and started Shaun’s water.

“Y’all get you some underwear and your pajamas.” I told the boys. They went and did as I had said.

After the boys were done with their baths, each of them read a book to me. They did such a good job that I gave them both a
Popsicle
and then we played for a little while before I put them both to bed. Once they we
re in bed, Kisha and I took a shower together and then went to bed.

Lala

I was laying down watching TV in my hotel room. I’d been renting a room at the Innkeeper over on
Piney Forest Rd. for the past few weeks. I’d lucked up and gotten a housekeeping job here the week before when one of the other housekeepers quit. I asked the manager if I could have the job. He told me to fill out the application and I did. When he saw that my previous job had been one dealing with janitorial services he told me that he was sure that I’d be great for the job and hired me right on the spot. Plus he gave me a discount on my room. That allowed me to be saving most of my paycheck. I was still putting in applications though because I needed a part-time gig. I was also looking for a place. I’d put in applications at most of the apartment complexes in the area. I was hoping to hear something back from them soon. I was so glad that I’d been saving my money and not blowing it like most young people. My mama had always told me that you never know what might happen and you will need something to fall back on. That is why I tried to keep money in the bank and it had turned out to be a good thing.

I laid there on the bed watching some movie on Lifetime but I wasn’t really into it. I was hungr
y and craving some tacos. I laid there
debating on whether or not I was going to go out and get some or if I was just going
to
order a pizza instead. I really didn’t feel like going out anywhere. I had become so lazy. All I wanted to do was lay around and sleep if I wasn’t working. I had to literally make myself get out of bed and do stuff.
I decided that I was going to put on some clothes and go out and get me some tacos. I’d been in b
ed all day. I needed to get out!

I got up, showered and got dressed in a pair of grey sweats, a black tee and my black forces. I went into the bathroom, took my scarf off and combed down my wrap. My hair was dark brown and shoulder length with blonde highlights.
Since I’d been pregnant my hair had been growing like crazy! It was almost past my shoulders now.
I brushed my teeth and put on a little bit of lip gloss. I looked in the mirror.

“That’s good enough.
I ain’t trying to impress nobody.”

I grabbed my coat, keys and my wallet and left out to go and get my food. I drove over to the Taco Bell on Riverside Dr. I decided to eat inside instead of ordering my food and going back to the room. I ordered six hard shell tacos and
a sweet tea. Once I had
my food I found a table towards the back next to a window. I sat down and started to eat my food.
I looked out of the window and saw a young Caucasian couple getting out of the car. The young man was helping his pregnant girlfriend get out. He wrapped his arm aro
und her as they walked inside. A wave of loneli
ness swept over me. I turned my attention back to my food but unconsciously my eyes wandered back to the couple who were now standing in line waiting to order. They looked so happy and in love. The
y
laughed and giggled, whispering back and forth as they waited. He rubbed and caressed her stomach.

For some reason what Nita had said to me weeks ago when we had gotten into it popped into my head. “
Now look at you! Pregnant and crying the blues because you got to hide your baby! His baby mama ain’t got to hide hers though, now do she? Nah, but that’s what happens when you settle for being a side bitch!
”

“I guess you were right about that part Nita.” I mumbled getting up from the table and dumping
the rest of my food into the garbage. My appetite was gone. I drove back to the room with thoughts of Tre heavy on my mind. I wanted to call him but I knew that I couldn’t. He had probably moved on to the next chic and wasn’t even thinking about my black ass. I went inside my room, undress
ed and got back in bed. I laid t
here trying to go to sleep for well over and hour but couldn’t.
Nita’s words kept haunting me and Tre was so heavy on my brain that it was impossible for me to fall asleep.

I got up and put back on my tee shirt. I walked over and sat at the table that was in my room and powered on my laptop.
I logged on to Facebook to see what was going on up there. It was the same as usual everybody telling all of their business. I shook my head. I’d hidden Tre’s post so that I couldn’t see what he posted unless I went to his page. I decided to go on his page to see what he’d been up to. I hadn’t checked since I’d left home. I typed in his name and clicked on his page. I saw that he’d uploaded some new photos of himself, Kisha and the boys. They looked extremely happy. I clicked on a photo of him and Kisha. He had his arms around her from behind as she stood in front of him smiling like she was the happiest woman in the world. Pains of jealousy and envy swept throughout my entire body. I went back to his page and strolled down reading his most recent status.
Focused on getting paper and taking care of my fam…fuck everything else! To all of you niggas that’s got a good woman in your corner that holds you down, takes care of you and most importantly puts up with your bullshit
, you’d better hold on to them. I’m damn sure holding on to mine! Shout out to my Queen Kisha…I love you woman!

I felt like somebody had just punched me in the throat! I quickly logged off and closed my laptop. I sat there for a few minutes just trying to digest what I’d read. I realized one thing, it was time for me to forget about this man and focus on myself and this baby that I was carrying. There was no way in hell that I could ever let him know now about our baby. Honestly I couldn’t see it doing anything but causing a lot of trouble that I didn’t feel like dealing with.

I opened my computer back up and went back on Facebook. This time I deleted Tre from my page. It was
time to delete him from my life and
my thoughts but most importantly from my heart. I’d known from day one that he was already taken so there was no use in me waiting around like he was going to call me up and confess his undying love for me and beg me to come back. That wasn’t going to happen.

My phone vibrated on the nightstand startling me. I jumped placing my hand over my chest. “Damn.” I got up and went over and picked up my phone. There was a text message from my mom.

Mom: Hey baby, j
ust checking on you to see if you are okay.

Me: Yes ma’am. I’m fine…about to go to bed. I love you.

Mom: Love you too. Call me tomorrow.

“Okay, I will.”

I placed my phone back on the nightstand and got in bed. As much as I didn’t want to think about the images of Tre and Kisha or his Facebook status that was all that I thought about until I fell asleep.

             
             
             
             
Lala

Over the next few weeks, all I did was work and save my money. I’d set some goals for myself. The first thing was to find a place within the next few months. I had to find a place before the baby was born because there was no way in hell I was staying in a hotel room with my baby. I’d also decided to write a book. I’d already gotten started. The title of my book
was Confessions Of A Side Chic
. The idea of course had come from my own personal experience. I figured that writing about my situation would be sort of therapeutic and if it turned out to be a good story I might could try and get it published. I refused to sit around and cry over spilled milk! I wasn’t going to allow the bad choices that I’d made determine the rest of my future!
It wasn’t the end of the world. Millions of women raised kids by themselves every day and I could do the same! I wanted to be someone that my baby could be proud of though. I didn’t want the only story that people ever told my child was how I got knocked up by somebody else’s man and ran away from my home to try and hide it! Hell no! My story was going to be different!

I sat in the doctor’s office on Wednesday evening flipping through the pages of a Paula Dean’s cooking magazine and waiting to be called to the back. This was my first doctor’s appointment, I knew that I was about three months pregnant but I wasn’t exactly sure. I felt bad that I hadn’t gone to the doctor before now to make sure that my baby was okay. It was alright though because from here on out I was going to make sure that I was at every appointment to ensure that I delivered a healthy baby.

A young woman who looked to be in her late twenties or early thirties came in and took the seat next to me. Her stomach was way out there like she was about to po
p at any second. “Hey.” She spoke
looking over at me
with a warm smile
. Her hair was in microbraids  pulled up into and ponytail with some down in the back. She had skin the color of mocha, dark brown beady eyes and when she smiled I noticed the wide gap between her two front teeth. She was about 5’6 and very petite except for her baby bump.

“Hey. How are you?”
I replied politely.