Shhh... Gianna's Side (23 page)

“Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!” Mack yelled.

“Take one more fucking step and I will make you really sorry. I’ll hurt her and don’t for one second think that I won’t. Now sit your ass down and watch the fucking show, McKenzie,” he ordered.

Mack did as she was told, concern and sympathy written all over her face.

“Now…where was I. Oh yes! I was making Gianna scream. Should I continue making her squirm or should I just fuck her and have you watch, Mack? Maybe you could lick her pussy again, seeing as I got to miss out on the show the first time. Why don’t we reenact everything you just described?”

His fingers moved faster as did his grunts and groans
, and I couldn’t hold back any longer. My eyes rolled to the back of my head and my pussy squirted from the most intense orgasm I had ever felt.

When I came to
, Mack was crying and it took me a minute to even figure out what the fuck just happened. 

“
That’s exactly what I thought, Gia.” He finally let me go with a growl and I subconsciously whimpered at the loss.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

Mack shook her head back and forth, grabbing the crayon and went right back to coloring on the wall.

I couldn’t take it anymore
. “What the fuck, Mack? Snap out of it! Stop coloring on the wall!”

“No, no, no, no…I have deadline. I promised Cara that I would have this done for her.”

“Cara? His daughter? What the fuck are you talking about, Mack? You’re not making any sense!”

“Yes…Cara, she’s sleeping and all this shouting is going to wake her up. She is going to start crying and be very upset. I need to make her happy, I need to make it okay. I won’t let her be sad ever again, I am a good mother. I am a good mother,” she repeated.

I looked over toward the mattress. “The doll?” Mr. Nichols nodded.

I got up and grabbed the doll from the leg
, holding it up.

“AHHHHHH! You’re hurting her! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? YOU CAN’T HOLD HER LIKE THAT!” she screeched at the top of her lungs.

I backed away from her with the doll and put my hand up in a surrendering gesture. “Calm the fuck down, Mack, it’s a doll. This is not Cara, it’s a doll. It’s fake! Look,” I rationalized, pulling off her arm.

“AHHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOO!” She ran at me and knocked me onto my back with
such force that it knocked the wind out of me and I saw stars.

“Why? Why would you hurt her? She didn’t do anything to you,” she
bellowed, trying to hit me all over my face. I covered myself as best as I could.

I removed my arms to look at her
. “It’s a doll!” I shouted.

“No
, it’s not, it’s Cara!”

She grabbed my hair, brought my head forward and slammed it back to the ground over and over again.

And then everything went black.

My eyes fluttered. I was lying in a comfortable bed and my head was on a pillow, I had forgotten what it felt like to have a pillow. I pulled the soft silk sheets to my chin and breathed in the smell of honey, it was all around me. I remembered that smell. It was same scent that I wore in high school. Was I home? Had it all been a dream? I cracked one eye open and then the next. It was dark outside, really dark, but soft lighting surrounded the room from a few candles. I leaned forward, hissed, and immediately grabbed the back of my head.

“Are you okay?” I looked to the right where I saw his shadow. The cast of lighting made him shimmer. He looked translucent
, wearing clean clothes.

“Yeah…what happened? What’s going on?”

“Well, McKenzie kicked your ass and then knocked you the fuck out,” he said, laughing.

“Thanks for you sympathy,” I sarcastically stated.

He grinned. “You’re fine. You just have a nasty bump on the back of your head.”

I nodded
. “Why do I feel like I’m waking up to my last supper? Is this where you tell me to choose a meal? I mean, I’m clean and in some sick, twisted version of a romance novel.”

He chuckled and moved to the edge of the bed. I scooted back till I hit the wall and covered myself with the sheet; it was the first time he was allowing me modesty and I took it.

“Are you afraid of me?” he question with an amused expression.

I cocked my head to the side
. “Not scared but cautious. I don’t understand the games you’re playing and I’m not going to pretend like I do.”

He threw his head back and laughed. Fuck! He had turned insane like McKenzie; I was stuck with two crazy people in the middle of nowhere and now I was the last one standing.

He came toward me quick-like and I put my hands up, surrendering. “I’m not going to hurt you, G. I want to check the back of your head and make sure the bleeding has stopped.”

He was back
to calling me G. He was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde; instead, he was Mr. Nichols, and James.

“Oh…okay,” I whispered, tilting my head forward so he could check me. His hands were soft and tender; he was examining me with concern. I waited on pins and needles for the other shoe to drop. Why was he being nice to me?

“Why are you being nice to me?” I blurted.

He sat back down in front of me
. “I think it’s funny that you’re covering yourself with that blanket, considering I just bathed you completely.”

I shrugged.

He sighed. “I honestly don’t know why I’m being nice to you. All I know is when you were knocked unconscious, my first thought was that she killed you. My heart literally stopped until I felt your pulse, after that, I moved in autopilot, trying to revive you. You went in and out of consciousness and babbled incoherent things. But you kept asking for James, your voice was pleading and painful to hear,” he agonized. “I cleaned you up by the lake and you were so helpless, I could have done anything to you without your recollection. When I had you in my arms, I felt whole. I remembered the feel of you. I hadn’t thought about that in a long time…I didn’t want you to wake up in a filthy bed.” He paused. “It’s just some sheets.”

I sat there wide-eyed. I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. Was this more games?

“I can’t explain, it but I wanted to take care of you and make sure you were okay. That’s all.”

“Did you care about any of that when you sodomized me and left me in a dark room for days?” I sadistically questioned.

He shook his head. “I checked on you the entire time. Every time you passed out.”

“What about the other thing?”

“I make no excuses for what I did. I also don’t regret it and I would do it again. I only feel remorse that I hurt you. But not that I was inside you again.”

Neither one of us spoke after that. I lay down and flinched when he came to lie next to me. We both stared at the ceiling. I thought about how I found myself in
a situation like that. If I hadn’t found out about McKenzie and my father, would I have reacted the same way? Would Mack have been able to calm me down before I let all the emotions fuel my hatred for everything that had happened? Or would I have still wanted to hurt him?

But isn’t revenge supposed to make you feel better?

"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?"
[12]
I recited Shakespeare back to him.

He turned his face to look at me
. “I think that’s the first time you’ve ever quoted Shakespeare to me,” he laughed, amused.

I continued to stare at the ceiling
. “The entire time I planned it, I thought about that verse. It repeated itself in my head like a broken record. I couldn’t get it to stop. I’m not trying to make you feel bad for me, but what would you have done? I think if you put yourself in my shoes for a minute, maybe you could relate. Sending you to prison was not part of the plan. I was young and stupid and I didn’t think it would go that far. I just thought you’d be fired and sent away. I didn’t want to see you anymore and I wanted you to go away,” I informed.

He
hadn’t moved either, and I didn’t know if he was listening or tuning me out so I kept going.

“Mack hurt me and I never thought that would happen. Not once did I ever think she would betray me. Especially not with my own father. It didn’t matter all the lies that I had hidden from her, because I was the bad guy. I was perfectly okay with being the bad guy and put her up on this pedestal where she could do no wrong. She was the perfect one. All the years of jealousy
, it never crossed my mind that she would betray me and have secrets of her own,” I reasoned.

“How could we have been best friends, sisters…and not known each other at all? I don’t understand. I would have died for her. And the sick
thing is that I would still die for her. How do I love someone so much that I also hate? I can’t fathom how after all these years, I still love her. I don’t want anything bad to happen to her, but I caused her so much damage. She would never want to hurt me, I know that now, and I guess I knew that then. But it didn’t stop me from wanting to ruin her. She screwed me and I fucked her. I couldn’t let it go. Revenge spawned an endless cycle of retribution for me. I fucked up my life as much as I did yours and Mack’s, so in the end, nobody won. Most of all, me,” I rationalized.

“For what it’s worth, even if it’s nothing
–” I turned to look at him “–I am very sorry. But you’ve seen who I am. You can’t imagine I am happy? I’m not living the life you thought I would be and neither is McKenzie. Nothing you evoke can change that. We punished ourselves far worse than you have or could have done.”

I sat up
, still looking at him. “I think you know that and that’s why you hate us. Revenge isn’t so sweet anymore, is it? It’s much better in the package.”

He placed his hand on top of mine and I looked down on them
. “I don’t hate you, and that’s what I can’t fucking understand.” I peeked up at him through my lashes. “I don’t hate you and I have every right to. I can’t. I never could. I thought bringing you here would help and it hasn’t. I’m completely obsessed with you, just as much, if not more than, I was years ago. You’re the fucking plague and it’s in my blood, there is no cure from you. I have looked for it.” His hand slowly moved to my hand that was holding up the sheet.

“I have always been able to see right through you
,” he divulged, lowering my hand to bring down the blanket.

“And now all I can think about it sinking into your sweet pussy
. It took everything in me not to do it the other night.”

His hand grazed my throat and I moaned at the thought of
him choking me again, but I stayed still, waiting for his next move.

“You enjoy pain
, don’t you?”

I nodded.

“When did that start?” he asked as his hand moved toward my breasts.

“I don’t know. After everything that happened with you, I guess. Jake didn’t know how to handle it. I barely understand it.” I nervously chuckled and his hand backed away.

“You’re with Jake?”

I shook my head
. “I was. We got divorced a really long time ago. I don’t even remember being married to him. I was drunk half the time. It only lasted about a year and a half.”

“The other night
… I thought you were enjoying it, G. You’ve been wanting me to hurt you this entire time and I finally hit my breaking point and I wanted to hurt you. However, I thought you were enjoying it. When you turned around and looked at me, I’ve never seen that look in your eyes. It nearly killed me. The mere thought that you felt like I violated you…raped you…made me fucking sick. As soon as I left the room and locked you in there I threw up,” he admitted.

“I locked you in there not to punish you but to punish myself. I couldn’t look at you and see the harm that I caused. All I thought about in prison was to hurt you. Both of you. I wanted revenge and the moment I saw you lying tied to the bed
, I knew I couldn’t go through with it. I’ve kept you here for four weeks because I wanted you close to me. And that’s the God’s honest truth. I’ve been fighting my demons and that’s you. You’re the forbidden fruit. You’re still mine and that scares the shit out of me,” he whispered the last few words as if it pained him to say them.

“What happens from here?”

He sighed. “I let you go. I let you both go. There’s nothing left here for me, for any of us. It was a mistake. And in a fucked up way, I think everyone can leave with some peace.”

“What if I don’t want to go?” That caught his attention, he looked right at me, but this time was different.

“Why is that?”

“I have nothing to go back to.”

“And you do here?”

“Yes,” I hesitated. “I have you.” 

He reached for the blanket and pulled it away from me. I was exposed to him in a much different way than I had been since I had gotten there. My guard was down and so was my flag. 

“You’re still so goddamn beautiful,” he praised, with a sincere tone.

“Spread your legs for me, G.” I slowly parted my thighs and opened them in a V with my knees bent.

He made a noise that came from
the back of his throat. He pulled me in hard and kissed me with his tongue, tasting every bit of my mouth, with one hand at the back of my neck keeping me close to him where he wanted. His face turned to taste me deeper. I moaned, moving my hips to get some undivided attention to my ache. I could feel him smiling at his recognition of my subtle request. He suddenly grabbed a fistful of my hair; I yelped at the sudden intrusion, his indirect way of letting me know that he was still in charge.

My pussy throbbed.

He kissed and licked his way down my neck to my breast, bringing my nipple into his mouth and sucking hard. Once it was a pebbled stone, he made his way to the other one and I held onto the back of his neck, wanting him to move lower. He nipped at my nipple, reminding me that he was in control. He broke away, making his way down to where I needed him the most. Grinning, he pushed me back and I fell against the pillows, he grabbed the backs of my thighs and leveraged them upward toward the ceiling. My pussy was right in his face and he inhaled my scent.

When his tongue reached its destination
, he took my clit into his mouth and lightly sucked. My head fell back in pleasure. It had been entirely too long since he touched me like that. No one could make me feel worshipped like he could. The closeness of his mouth to my most private area was a feeling that had me grabbing the sheets in a frenzy, and he had barely even touched me yet. I expected him to be rough, but he was being gentle, taking his time to devour me and make me wet.

“Oh God,” I whimpered in pleasure.

He licked me one last time and then stopped. “Tell me what you want. Beg me for it,” he huskily urged.

“Please…” I responded on edge.

“Please…what, G?” he goaded.

“Please make me come.”

He growled and returned to lapping at my folds, making me go crazy with passion and desire. Feelings that only he produced. He licked me from my anus to my opening and then back to my clit. He sucked, and when he moved his head up, down, and then side to side, it was my undoing and I came with such force that had my back lifting off the sheets and my eyes rolling to the back of my head.