She's Asking for It!

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Authors: Eve Kingsley

Tags: #Psychology, #Human Sexuality

BOOK: She's Asking for It!
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She's Asking for It!
The Sex Your Woman is Secretly Craving
(and How to Give it to Her)
A Guide for Men, Women, and Couples

By Eve Kingsley

 

INTRODUCTION

 

The cliché that the heat of relationships tends to fade with time may seem obvious to even the newest sexual explorer, but the reason behind this sexual decline may surprise you. The kind of passion that keeps love alive is a deep desire that most women are too shy to admit, men are too scared to try and some couples are too uncomfortable to talk about, even inside the safe space of their bedroom. It’s not anything kinky or crazy, nothing shocking or strange, but it is something that recent polls have shown can drive a woman absolutely wild!

 

What is this sensual secret, you ask? Prepare yourself to take a few small steps, followed by a few giant leaps, into the wonderful world of the alpha male. Recent studies have shown that most women long to be sexually dominated by strong and assertive men who aren’t afraid to take charge of their nocturnal activities.

 

It doesn’t sound like such an outlandish thing to discuss, does it? We aren’t talking about strange kinks and extreme BDSM here, just a little naughty fun and a bit of bedroom play! Unfortunately for most modern couples, more often than not women, are too afraid to ask their husbands to be a bit rough and men get remarkably timid when they feel they might be crossing the line when it comes to dominating their sexual partners.

 

This is understandable.
Over the last few decades, there has been a complicated combination of the feminist revolution and the birth of political correctness that has really muddled the issues. Even the most intimate relationships are marred by this desire to remain inside the lines. On top of all the difficulties that couples have just talking about this topic, there are still so many women out there who have been raped, sexually abused or assaulted by men, and more often than not, by men they know and with whom they have had intimate relationships. This makes any kind of foray into the realm of rough play even more dangerous for both partners.

 

It is entirely within the realm of reason that a woman who feels any sort of kinship with feminism and who owns her own position of female power in an egalitarian relationship would be reluctant to ask her man to be more, well, “manly” in the bedroom. And any man who respects his woman is going to feel a bit uncomfortable with taking the chance to treat his partner in life like she’s a toy to be played with, even if she’s the sexiest toy you’ve ever seen. Even if she’s given him hints. Even if she’s been waving flags of invitation for weeks or months. It’s not easy being alpha!

 

It can be incredibly scary to entertain the thought of volunteering to be roughed up even a little bit during sex, and it certainly isn’t an easy task to be the one roughing, with a million questions racing through your mind:

 

  • Does she really want this?
  • How assertive can I be?
  • Am I pushing it too far?
  • Am I being assertive enough?
  • Is this what she wants?
  • Will this change our relationship?

 

And what about her? Even if this is her idea, there are going to be a lot of questions for her:

 

  • Is this what he wants?
  • Will he be able to stop?
  • How will he treat me outside the bedroom?
  • How do I bring this up with him in the first place?
  • What happens when I want it to stop?
  • Isn’t it too crazy to want to do this?

 

But things don’t have to be so confusing! Male domination in the bedroom is a perfectly normal fantasy shared by millions of couples in healthy, long-term, loving relationships. It’s so common that it’s not even on the same scale as role-playing, or BDSM techniques, or anything that would require a great deal of effort for that matter. If may take some time and thought, and a great deal of communication, but honestly, if you don’t already have these things in your relationship, you should be working on them any way!

 

Think of the “Alpha Male” fantasy this way - on the scale of kink, having your guy be a little bit rough and a lot manly with you doesn’t even tip the balance. To put your fantasy into perspective, consider this:

 

  • There are successful executives who like to wear diapers and be spanked.

 

  • There are couples that only have sexual relations when dressed up as large stuffed animals.

 

  • Plenty of men and women are aroused only when others are watching them.

 

  • Some men like to be forced to wear women’s clothing, or to lick their wife’s shoes.

 

  • Some women like to pee on their partner during sex.

 

If the message hasn’t come across loud and clear yet, maybe you need to hear it one more time: couples that like a little rough sex every once in a while are
not
pushing the envelope on the kink factor. It is a perfectly normal impulse for women to crave something more from their everyday encounters and men who want to make this fantasy come true are not only helping to create a great deal more intimacy in their loving relationships, but learning to harness their own personal power and capture their own sense of confidence!

 

By the time you finish reading this book, you will both have learned to not only feel more comfortable talking about your bedroom desires together, but you will have everything you need to start acting out some of the male-dominant scenarios you’ve been dreaming of during your next trip to the bedroom.

 

What to Expect

 

This book has been split up into three separate parts. The first section of the text is written especially for the men. Any guy worth his salt is going to be apprehensive about roughing up his partner during loving, consensual sex. You probably have a lot of questions that need answering when it comes to being successful at indulging your ladylove, so read on, Manly Man. When you are through with the chapters in Part One, you will be completely prepared to sit down with your lover and make a plan to take your lovemaking to the next level – starting tonight!

 

Ladies, the second part of this book is dedicated to you. There are parts you will want to share with your partner (and he may want to share some bits from Part One with you!) but there is also a chapter for your eyes only. Together we will figure out exactly what it is that you really want your man to do in the bedroom, how to talk to him about it, and then how to show him. We will discuss the boundaries you should set up, and we will also talk about what this does and doesn’t mean for you outside the bedroom. This could mean a big change in your relationship and you want to make sure that those changes are meaningful, exciting and always for the best!

 

The final section of this book is for both of you. Read it and then talk about it. It provides tips and suggestions for couples to get into the spirit of a woman’s deepest desires. From dirty talk, oral sex, rough intercourse and intimate communication, all the way to taking it up a notch with toys and games, you’ll figure out exactly what you need to get things started and keep them going in the right direction.

 

This exciting, erotic and intimate sex play can herald the beginning of thrilling experiences for you both, an adventure allowing couples around the world to feel closer and share their deepest yearnings and hottest hopes for love and sexual exploration. If you’re both ready to take the next step, this is the time to hand the book over to the man of the house and get started on this journey together.

 

PART ONE: FOR MEN

 

Chapter One – The Alpha Male

 

Women sure are a mystery, aren’t they? This must be a confusing time for you, finding out that what your woman wants most is for you to be more of the strong, silent type and take the chance to rough her up a bit. It goes against pretty much everything you know about how to woo a woman, doesn’t it?

 

First of all, it goes against everything you were taught as a young man going out into the world. Even if your dad was a lumberjack when you were a kid, just think for a moment about all the advice you’ve been given in your life, starting from when you were just a little tyke and continuing all the way into your adolescence and adulthood:

 

  • Respect your mother.
  • Be gentle with your sister.
  • Never hit a girl.
  • Girls hate bullies and bad boys, so play nice.
  • Be a gentleman; open doors, pull out chairs.

 

The list goes on and on. When you grew up – and so did the women around you – there were terrifying concepts like date rape and sexual harassment, things that can strike fear into the hearts of anyone, man or women, scared to make the wrong move or be taken advantage of in some way. I’m sure at your college or at your job you’ve attended a mandatory training session about what is and is not acceptable with women in more formal settings:

 

  • No lewd jokes
  • No touching, even casually
  • No physical compliments
  • No dating in the workplace

 

And all of that is only scratching the surface of the fight women have had to wage for equality in our society, of which I’m sure you’re well aware. Unlike the generations that have come before you, you have probably had a female boss or two, or at least know women who make more money than you or are in higher positions in your field of work, women who demand respect and can take care of themselves. So, it’s been drummed into your head that:

 

  • Women are just as good at tough jobs as men.
  • Women deserve equal pay.
  • Women can assume positions of authority.
  • Women must be treated with the same respect as men.

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