She's All That (22 page)

“You didn't bring him here?”

“No, I left him in Berkeley. He was a user, Lilly. He stole your check. I didn't do a lot to stop him, but I was in over my head.”

“Allow me this. I was right?”

“You were right, okay? I just wanted to get him something so he wouldn't be so angry. I thought they'd give him some type of advance on the check, and I figured Sara would be covered. I knew they'd never cash the whole thing.”

“You took my license. So clearly, you had a little thought process going there.”

“That was his idea,” Kim says, and I can tell this conver-kristin sation is wearing on her. “I wouldn't have thought of your ID. You know that.” Kim's forehead is brimming with sweat, and her coloring appears to be getting worse before my eyes.

“Why on earth would I trust you?” I allow my gaze to focus intently on her, trying to see if she's lying to me.

“I can't think of a single reason, but I just don't want to go back out there. Do you think Nate would take me in?” Kim starts to back away from the door.

“I have no idea, but Nate seems to be busy lately. What would I have done if you got that money? I couldn't pay the rent. I didn't have a job, and you know my name is on this lease. You knew that when you left me holding the bag. Did you think Sara would just forgive a $20,000 debt?”

“I told you I didn't think they'd cash the check. We've been friends a long time, Lilly. I made a bad error in judgment, okay? Two years and one really bad decision. That doesn't seem completely awful, does it?”

I sigh aloud. Mostly because I know I'm going to forgive her. I can't stand to see her like this.

“I didn't want to fail again, Lilly, and you weren't listening to me. Just like Sara. You were just going full-steam ahead, doing what you wanted to do. If I stayed, you would have just trampled me to get what you need so your grandmother would approve. I'm sorry your Nana doesn't support you, but it's not my problem.”

I'm losing a little compassion as she speaks. “You're actually trying to blame this on me?”

“No, I'm not. Please, Lilly, let me in. You know I wouldn't come back here if I had anywhere else to go. I'm sorry.”

I open the door a bit wider, knowing I'll probably regret the decision. “One night. And we're going shopping at six. You're coming with me, because I'm not leaving you here alone with my computer and sewing machine.”

“I wouldn't steal those things from you. I only took the money because he needed a fix. If I wanted to steal those things, I would have taken them the first time.”

“Somehow, that doesn't ease my troubled mind, you know?”

“Just tell me how to start making it up to you? I've got nowhere to go. You know this wasn't like me.”

“First off, I want my ID back.” I hold my palm out, and she reluctantly digs through her pocket and hands me my California driver's license. “Then I want you to go upstairs and leave something of importance with Nate. As collateral.”

“Like what? Don't you think if I had anything, I wouldn't be here?”

“Your mother's locket.” I glare at the one thing of value she holds dear. An ivory cameo that couldn't be more out of place on her tattooed self, but she wears it every moment on a black leather cord. I've never seen her take it off.

She shakes her head. “No, please, Lilly.”

“Nate has a safe, Kim. You either put it there, or you're not staying. You can go camp out in the Theater District, like all the other homeless.”

She sighs and turns around, pulling her hair off her neck. “No, I'll leave it. I need you to trust me again, but I'm sure you'll want my firstborn too.”

“No, just a lock of his hair.” I grimace at her, and go back to finishing my drawings, having the pressure of the perfect wedding gown hanging over my head. Without the four hundred man hours I need, it's going to have to be fairly simple.

Scratch that.
I toss the sketch book aside.
What am I thinking
to send Kim up alone?
Like she's going to hand over her most prized possession without me watching the transaction.

I run up the stairs and see Kim at Nate's doorstep. She's shuffling her feet while he yells at her. “Lilly trusted you, Kim. You should have seen her face when she realized you were gone. She wouldn't believe it!”

“I didn't want to be in the design business anymore, Nate. You don't know what it's like being color-blind around a group who needs the perfect color. It's like realizing my handicap every moment of every day. This guy offered me a ticket out of California. At least, I thought he did.”

“You are not going to try that with me. You had a choice. Lilly never left you without a choice. She thought you needed a job, and she made one for you. How do you repay her?”

“Look, I didn't come here to be judged.”

“Why
did
you come here?” Nate snaps.

“Lilly says I need to leave some collateral with you.” Kim reluctantly hands him the cameo. “This was my mother's.”

“How do I know your mother isn't in Topeka with a pile of these? Or this isn't some eBay junk?”

Kim's voice cracks. “She's not in Topeka, okay? You just have to trust me, I suppose. Lilly does; she sent me up here by myself.”

Um, oops.

Nate takes the cameo from her. “If you hurt Lilly again, I'll tell Sara Lang where you are, and trust me, she won't be nearly so kind as Lilly.”

If
she
hurts Lilly again?
Hello! Did my knight in shining
armor not just pierce my heart with his very own sword?

“I'm trying to start fresh. I won't harm her again.”

“She deserves better, but I'll shout the truth from the rooftops to Sara Lang if you hurt Lilly again.”

“Deal.” Kim thrusts her hand toward Nate, and they shake on it.

I silently creep down the back stairs wondering what to make of Nate Goddard. No, that's not what I'm thinking at all. What I'm thinking is how can I get him to kiss me again? And how can I make the Miss Shampoo Commercial ride out on the horse she suddenly came in on? And then, of course, I'm having guilt because I know better.
Yes, Lord, I know better. But
I'm only human here.

chapter 19

I
call Nana and she's not home, so I try Max's place. I need to give them my new cell phone number.

“Max Schwartz,” he answers, far too professionally for a television writer.

“Max, it's Lilly. Is my Nana there? I wanted to give her my new cell number.”

“No.” He pauses. “But I'm here. I'll take your number,” he purrs flirtatiously.
What did I eat this week?
Or maybe it's my sense of freedom and unemployment that's turning all these guys into flirts.

“Where is she?”

“Your Nana?”

“No, Valeria.”

“That was just mean,” he tells me, and he's right.

“I'm sorry. I'm specializing in mean this week, and I'm not proud of it.”

“I've got a pen.”

“For?”

“Your number.”

He writes it down. “Mildred is outside gardening. You want me to call her?”

“You are trouble. Is she feeling okay?”

“She seems fine, Lilly. Whatever had her going back and forth to the hospital seems to be over.”

I let out a gasp. “Oh thank you, Jesus,” I whisper. “Just tell her to call me when she gets in, will you?”

“I will. Hey, Lil—” I hear Max start to say. But it's too late. I've already hung up on him. I reach for the phone a few times to call him back, but ultimately decide our conversation was done enough.

It's Friday afternoon and time for a whirlwind Spa Girls weekend. We don't usually do this—cluster our spa visits so close—but we don't usually have so much drama either. Hasty marriages, fashion design crises, and the sudden need for couture gowns. Oh, my!

As I stare across my loft, I'm looking at Kim knowing I don't have the guts to kick her out of the house.
I'm a wimp.
Nate is still not talking to me. Avoiding me like the plague might be a more appropriate term. Miss Shampoo Commercial hasn't been back, so I choose to think it was the lingering memory of my kiss that made him unable to follow through on his designs for those auburn waves of hair. I like the idea of him up there pining, wishing he had the strength to come down and kiss me again.

In a new development, Kim has decided to feel a little guilt and is working on computer patterns for me until she finds “a real job.” I'm very proud of the gowns I've sketched. They're better than anything I did for Sara Lang, so I'm grateful to have the help. When I'll find the time to actually sew them is still a mystery.

Kim is bent over the computer watching
The View
and yelling in agreement at the TV as the women take some anti-male stance. “Kim? I don't want to ruin your lovefest with the gals here, but I've left all the designs and the fabrics numbered that go with each pattern.”

She nods and doesn't tear her eyes from the TV. “Men are dogs.”

“The patterns are hanging in the coat closet, so don't put anything in here. I don't want the fabrics touched. I just need you to put the designs on the computer,” I say to Kim as I store the last of the fabric. “The drawings are on the sketch pad next to the computer. Don't cut any of the patterns. I know you mean well, but that fabric cost me a fortune, and I haven't paid for it yet. I'll have a sewing frenzy when I get back.”

“It'll be fine, Lilly. Just go, will you? You can trust me.”

Actually, I can't, can I?
I think. Then I shrug. It's too late to fix it now, and I've got my driver's license well-hidden in my wallet and no more money for her to take. I pack my new sketch pad and Morgan's wedding fabric, plus the material I picked out for Poppy and myself. I'm hoping we'll have a bridesmaid gown at the end of this weekend and approval for the design and fabric of the wedding gown. If all goes well, I can cut fabric and pin while the girls get spa treatments.

“I'll be on the cell. The number is right here over the phone,” I point. “Don't answer the phone. It's forwarded to my cell, and Sara can't know you have any part in this, or I'll never get the money. Just do me a favor and work on the computer, will you?”

“It's fine. Everything's fine. Just go, will you?”

I back out of the door with one outfit for the entire weekend, as my bag is packed full with Morgan's wedding fabrics. The last thing I need is my common stuff mingling with her material that's fit for a queen. So my stuff—the riffraff—is in a plastic bag squished in with Morgan's fabric.

“Need some help?” Nate's standing over me as I try to shut the door.

Well, look what the cat dragged in.
“I've got it, thanks.”

“Are you ever going to talk to me again?”

Oh, isn't that just like Nate to play innocent?

“I've been here,” I shrug. “I'm paying you for this,” I nod to the sewing machine. “The computers, too. I'll have your money next week. We'll talk then. It's my policy to not talk to investors until they're paid in full.”
See, this is the great thing
about your own business. You make the rules as they're convenient.
“See you, Kim!”

“Lilly, this is stupid.”

Nate picks up the suitcase, an old hardshell Samsonite in avocado that once belonged to my Nana. He hefts the sewing machine too. I'm left with only my cashmere sweater tossed over my arm. The one I made from Sara Lang scraps. We hike down the stairs.

“You have to talk to me someday. I shouldn't have kissed you, all right? I'm sorry.”

“It's me who shouldn't have kissed you. You caught me off guard,” I say. “I was just too polite to turn you down. I think in actuality I was kissing Stuart Surrey, and you just happened to be in between us.”

“You
are
too polite, or you wouldn't have Kim back in your place. I can't believe you. I know about doing the decent Christian thing, but don't you people have missions for that?”

“I'm wise as a serpent, gentle as a dove.”
Stupid as a sheep.
“My choice. My problem.” We reach the bottom of the stairs, and Morgan's waiting for me in her BMW. She opens the trunk without getting out of her car. I never look at Nate. “Thanks for the help. See you Monday.”

“Ugh!” I shout once I'm in the car, looking back at Nate.

“That was nice of Nate to help you down,” Morgan says, waving at him.

I grab her hand and force it down. “Stop that. He's a jerk, all right?”

“A girl could do worse than him,” Morgan says.

“Not really, no, she couldn't,” I say, as she just stares at me waiting for an explanation. “He kissed me the other night. No, he snogged me full on,” I correct. “Actually, he kissed me, then the next night had a cozy date up to his loft. Then he said he hoped I understood we're just friends. Of course, this was after I saw him with the girl.” Okay, maybe it wasn't after I saw him. I just can't remember. It
feels
like it was after Shampoo Girl.

“Oh,” Morgan says. “Well, he's not a Christian.” Morgan starts to give him a wave involving a single finger, when I shove her hand down again. “Speaking of jerks,” she continues, “Stuart asked me to give this to you. He came into Daddy's store yesterday. Lilly, you need to run from this guy. I thought of not giving it to you. He sauntered into Daddy's store like you were the best of friends.”

Morgan hands me a small, blue package. I unwrap a wad of tissue paper and find Stuart's business card and an English toffee with a note that reads, “Something sweet for someone sweet. Looking forward to getting to know you better.”

“Morgan, look!” I show her the card, and she rolls her eyes.