She Lies Twisted (24 page)

“
It’s okay,” I told her, unsure of what I was supposed to do. She was bleeding profusely from a wound in her stomach but was too hunched over for me to see it properly. She reached out a hand and touched my chin with her nails. Across her wrist was a bracelet I’d never seen before in black gold. It sparkled in the little bit of sun that managed to reach us through the trees.

“
The soul tracker,” she whispered. “Its magic is interfering with my ability to power the harp.” I raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything about the blood. If she thought she was okay, I was going to have to trust her. In reality, I knew nothing about the harpies. “Please remove it.” I slid the bracelet off of her wrist and opened my purse.

“
No,” she said suddenly, her eyes wide and full of pain. “Put it on and go. Jessica will not be able to track you. Approach her slowly and use your single chance wisely.”

“
Are you going to be okay here?” I asked, hastily slipping the bracelet on and rising to my feet. The demons were getting closer. I could practically smell them, one part anger and two parts desperation. Her eyes glittered and she nodded before letting her head hang loosely again. I bit my lip and backed away slowly. I had to trust her, too. It was hard but maybe it was some kind of test that I’d set for myself in a past life.

I took a deep breath and followed the wall around until gravestones began to dot the ground around me. The cemetery was old and trees had sprung up over the years, obscuring the oldest graves. I used them as cover as I followed the trail of death to my sister.

Unfortunately for me, she was across the field with Nethel, who was lying motionless in the grass. And James.

“
Jessica, don't!” I shouted, stumbling into the clearing. Blood was soaking the front of my sweatshirt making it heavy and cumbersome to move around. She ignored me like she'd done a million times before and put the flute to her lips. It was like I could see the music streaming from the silver metal, wrapping around the gathered spirits and twisting them until they were unrecognizable. In her eyes, I saw death. James and mine both.

“
Did you know?” Her wicked voice had whispered in my ear. “The only way to kill a summoner is with a knife, soaked in the blood of a loved one?”

I pressed my hands over my head to block out the memory.

“
Neil!” James was screaming at me from across the grove. I looked up at him. He was still pinned to the tree by the demon that had thrown me. I pulled my sweatshirt off and started to run. This was my fault. I'd had the chance to stop Jessica before. I could've made her transition peacefully. Instead, I'd been selfish. I was going to have to deal with the consequences of that.
Please let Boyd be okay,
I thought.
Please don't let his love for me be his undoing.

“
You don't have a choice now, Neil. Come here or I'll rip his fucking head off,” she mocked as demons moved towards James, drawn like moths to light. I locked eyes with the person that had managed to become my best friend in a matter of days. He was scared but brave. His eyes told me not to move forward.
Am I in love with him?
I wondered. I'd never been in love before but I knew the love I felt for James was different than the kind I'd felt for Abe or my mother or Boyd. I took a deep breath and used that thought as fuel to push my shaking legs forward. There was nothing I could do for Jarrod and deep down, I was glad. It was sort of his fault that we were here in the first place. Jessica had loved him wholly and utterly and he had spit on that love, turned her into this monster. She may have still looked pretty but Jessica was the most demonic one of them all.

I checked to make sure the harp was still strapped to my belt. I had learned my lesson at the school and again, at the park. I wouldn't drop it again.

“
I'm so happy, Tate,” she whispered, her eyes full of tears. “You and me and Jarrod, we'll be together forever. There's nothing better than that, Tate, nothing.” My fingers twitched near the strings.
She pushed you off of that cliff.
The thought didn't make what I had to do any easier. I glanced back over at James. He was okay still but for how long? Jessica had killed Jarrod without much thought. I didn't have any time to question myself.

I paused in front of her, our bloody shoes nearly toe to toe.

She pulled the knife across her wrist in one last, cruel gesture.

I pulled the first string. Music wrapped around me, lifted me up like wings and took me to that other place where the people I loved didn't die and the hurt I felt was just a distant star in the sky.

I closed my eyes and let the sound of music wash over and through me. It was the sound of Ehferea's soul singing gently, beckoning to me. My feet moved to follow her voice, my voice, entangled together in the words I'd read but hadn't understood.
She lies twist'd, twist'd twist'd.
I had been twisted, by pain, by fate, by loss but I was starting to understand that there was more to me than that. I was starting to realize that I could untangle myself from the hurt and still be me. I could still love, I could still live. I opened my eyes and stopped. This song wasn't for me. It was for my sister, my twin, my heart.

“
Tate?” Jessica whispered, looking back at me through blue eyes that sparkled with tears and confusion and fear.

“
I'm here,” I said and pulled her against me and then there was nothing but us. I stroked her hair back and let the harp lull us to the ground where we knelt, just the two of us, and let the hurt soak away into the grass like rain.

“
I'm afraid,” she said, clutching my shirt with a shaking fist. Her body shook while she cried the tears she'd been holding back for so long. I rubbed her back in little circles and tried to breathe in the scent of her hair. This was goodbye but that was okay. She had left me before in a whirlwind of pain and misunderstanding and frustration. Now was our chance to make that right. “And I'm sorry.” She pulled away from me and cupped my cheeks with her hands before planting a kiss on my forehead like she'd always done when we were little. I took her hands in my own and pulled them down, stared at identical fingers and identical knuckles wrapped together in love.

“
I forgive you,” I told her, my own eyes dry. I couldn't let her see me cry for her lost life. It was my turn to be strong. When Mom had died, she had shouldered the brunt of the hurt. I could do the same for her. “And I'm sorry, too, for not understanding how hurt you were. If I had seen the signs I would...” She shushed me with a finger to my lips and stood. She was gazing away from me, at something I couldn't see. I didn't turn around but I knew that whatever it was, it was good and that my sister would be taken care of. I watched her face sparkle. The anger was gone, the betrayal was gone. She was just Jessica again.

Her clothes fell from her body until she stood naked and full of a light I had thought she had lost. When she began to walk away, I let her. I let the music fade away into the sound of the wind against the headstones and I watched as the demons around me changed into people with smiles and frowns and tears and laughter. James fell to his knees at the base of the tree, freed from the demon's grip. I stayed there, kneeling, waiting for my heart to stop pounding.

He came to me and sat down while Ehferea and Nethel stood behind him, hurt but alive. I smiled then and that's when the tears I'd been holding back burst forth. She was gone. She was really gone this time and I had sent her away. I had done it. I had loved her and I had proved it but God, it had hurt so much.

“
James?” I said, unable to move or even breathe. He came forward, through the mud and pulled me against him, holding me while I cried for a job well done and a job that had yet to come.

It was time to say goodbye to Boyd.

James and I sat in the center of the clearing together while I let the tempestuous sea of my emotions relax into a quiet thunder. Nethel had retreated back into the forest and I knew that she would take care of Ehferea as James was taking care of me. I needed to go back and help Boyd but first, I would take this moment for Jessica. I laid on my back in the grass and held her sweatshirt in my hands, putting the bloody fabric to my face. It still smelled like her. It wouldn't for long but for now I was glad because it was just what I needed. James gave me a few moments for my thoughts before speaking.

“
You were brave,” he told me softly. I nodded but didn't speak. Losing her again was hard but the way she'd looked at me in that last moment, that was beautiful. She'd been happy. It had been a long time since I'd seen her like that.

“
I don't feel brave,” I admitted. James nodded and scooted closer to me, lifting my head into his lap.

“
Bravery isn't about not being scared,” he told me, looking down into my eyes. I traced the new stitches over his eyebrow. “It's about pushing forward even though you are scared.” I put the sweatshirt over my face. James pulled it back. “It's time to be brave again,” he told me without mercy. I was stalling. I glanced away.

“
I fucked it all up, James,” I said, rolling onto my side. He kept my head in his lap and waited. I had to tell him now. Jessica was gone. I didn't have that as an excuse anymore. I wanted James to know before he touched Boyd that it was my fault. “He loved me so fucking much and I just wanted him to be happy. I didn't do it on purpose.” James' breath sped up and I recognized that he was feeling like I'd felt at the table. He was seeing me in his own mirror.
Are we soul mates?
I wondered absently. I didn't know much about that but I knew we were partners. Now and forever, harpies be damned. Friendship is eternal.
And this might be something more...

“
We had sex and it meant nothing to me. Boyd, he cried.” I picked at the grass and wished there were daisies so I could make a chain. Busy work helped the words come out. “I only did it once and I told him I didn't want it to be like that. I think he thought I didn't love him.” I turned over so James could see my face, so he could see the face of a murderer. “But I did. He didn't know that and that's why he killed himself. Because of me.” Tears stung again. I couldn't even believe it. I thought I had cried enough already. How many tears did I have left inside my soul? James surprised me by tearing up, too. He bent down and pressed his forehead against mine. I could feel his lips in my hair when he spoke.

“
You're not a murderer,” he said softly and I thought could hear the howls of Boyd's demon. We had to go back. It wasn't fair to Boyd. I waited for James to finish anyway. I wanted to hear this. I needed somebody to tell me this or I could never go and live that life I told myself that I wanted. Jessica had lost her way and I had to find mine, for both of us. “We loved as much anyone can ever love. That's why we're here, Neil. Because we have a gift. This isn't a punishment. We're here to help people.” I nodded and he leaned back, reaching into his pocket for something. His hand retreated with a flash of silver.

I sat up quickly, bumping our foreheads painfully together and scooted back, rubbing my head.

“
A harmonica?” I asked, taking it gently in my hand. This wasn't just any instrument. This was a part of James, like my hart was a part of me. On it, was a poem.

He lives twist'd, twist'd, twist'd,

Finds sol'ace at gray cliffs mist'd,

Soul is broken, blacken'd, dead,

His heart beats no more, clots with dread,

Pale and quilt'd, skin like ashe,

His eyes have darken'd, can't go back,

Lost and lonely, without hope,

Transitioner, save us, lead us home.

I think I read it four times before I looked back up at him. His eyes were raw and wanting. I handed him my harp.

“
That was you?” I asked. “At the park?” The twang I had heard, the thing that had broken Jessica's music. It had been him. He nodded but didn't speak as he read my poem. His eyes moved over the words as mine had, with understanding. We understood each other.

“
I've been to the Akashic Library,” he whispered quietly as the breeze played her soft fingers through his hair. He gestured at the harmonica with his chin. “I can open up a door with that. It's how I got the harpies to the park. If you want to go there later, I'd be happy to take you. It is beautiful and since Jessica's not tracking you anymore, it should be safe.” A smile crept up to my lips without my knowledge and then, as surreptitiously as it had come, it morphed into laughter. James stared at me, eyes wide with surprise. I think it might've been the first time he'd heard my real laugh. It felt good, like my lungs were full of bubbles. James smiled back at me and laughed, too. It was wonderful. Things could get better. They would get better but there was something I had to do first.