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When he reached for her, she flinched, but didn’t make a move to stop him. But then, instead of being dragged to the nearest available chair, as she’d expected, he just pulled her into his arms and held her. She’d thought she’d been crying before, but this unexpected show of kindness set her off on a crying jag that didn’t seem like it was ever going to stop.

“Shh,” he murmured, his lips pressed against her forehead. “Cry it out, Kate.”

So she did. She cried for every night she’d been alone, every night she wondered where he was, and if he was safe. She cried for every bitter word said between them, and the fact that they had mostly been hers. She cried because she had hated him—yes, actually hated him at times—for leaving her and cried because she’d still known he was the best husband in the world despite it all.

He
loved
her. She might let the anger and hurt cloud the truth, but she still knew it, deep down. He
loved
her and she’d basically just told him he never should have come home and broken his heart. The thought made her sob so hard that her throat actually began to hurt.

“You’ve got to calm down, Kate.”

It vaguely registered that Jarrod was having to raise his voice to be heard above her wails. “I d-don’t de-deserve to c-calm down.” She pushed him away. “I d-don’t deserve t-to have you h-hold me. You sh-shouldn’t c-comfort me.”

“Get back here,” he scolded, grabbing her in a hard hug.

She fought for a few seconds, but she was weak and limp from the tears she couldn’t stop, and eventually there was nothing else to do but let him hold her. She was a horrible person, the worst wife on the planet, and deserved to have her ass burning hot for the rest of eternity. She deserved nothing less, but she was weak, even now, so she collapsed against Jarrod and accepted his mercy.

* * *

Jarrod found Sean on the balcony that overlooked their backyard, smoking a cigarette. He only smoked in times of extreme duress, and then he turned to cigarettes like most women turned to pasta. He’d had the same pack, as far as Jarrod knew, locked in his desk drawer for the last four years. Apparently tonight had been the night to break open the pack and light up.

“Those can’t taste good,” he commented as he joined his friend. “Not after all this time.”

“Hey, battle. Want one?” He held the open pack in front of Jarrod, but he shook his head.

“No, thanks.”

“So, what brings you here?”

Jarrod cleared his throat. “I was dropping in to check on things. When I was with Kate today, well, I just thought she had some things on her mind.”

He nodded, keeping his gaze on the scenery below him. “You’ve always had good instincts for that kind of thing. Why is it you’re still single again?”

“I don’t know, maybe I only have good instincts when it comes to married women.”

Sean gave a low, dark chuckle. “I bet after what you’ve seen and heard these last few days you’re glad not to be married.”

Jarrod didn’t have an answer to that, so he kept to himself. Sean took a few more drags on his cigarette before he cleared his throat.

“How is she?”

“A mess,” he answered succinctly. “She’s real broken up about you.”

“I wish I could believe that.” He shook his head. “But battle, if you’d heard what she said to me—”

“I did hear, actually.”

“Then you understand—”

“What I understand, Green, is that your wife is confused. She’s hurting and she needs you. Was she out of line? Absolutely. Should she be punished? Without a doubt. But I’m here to tell you, man, you’re not handling things the right way.”

“Is that right?” His friend barked a laugh. “You might have good instincts, pal, but you
are
single. So whatever you think you know about women—”

“I know Kate,” he interjected, without heat, but firmly.

“Is that so?”

He could feel Sean’s gaze and he turned to meet it head on. When his friend seemed satisfied, he turned back to his cigarette.

“What did she say?”

“Man, you know I’m not going to play the messenger. Go ask her yourself.”

“I don’t know, Jarrod.” He let out a long sigh and put out his cigarette, grinding the butt into the railing until the embers went dark. “That woman can tear me to pieces with a single word. Hell, she can slice me in two with a look. I like to think she does it without even knowing, but what if I’m playing the fool? What if she does it just for the fun of it?”

“Don’t be an idiot, brother. Kate is crazy about you. She knows she fucked up, she knows she disappointed you. She just cried herself to sleep over it. You should go talk to her.” Sean tried to play it cool, like he was indifferent, but Jarrod had seen the way he flinched. “Go and talk to her, but this time, don’t make an ass of yourself, OK?”

“Is that what I’ve been doing?” This time, when he chuckled he sounded a bit more like himself.

“I don’t know, man. Like you said, I
am
single. What do I know?”

“Cute.” He leaned forward on his elbows and clasped his hands, his eyes still staring forward. “And if you were me?”

He didn’t have to think twice. “If I were you, I’d go tell her that I loved her, and make sure she knew it. Then I’d give her a reason or two to think twice about watching her mouth in the future. Then I’d forgive her.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

“The right thing isn’t always easy,” Jarrod pointed out. “You and I both know that.”

“I can’t help thinking it’d be easier if she was a field mission. Understand, plan, execute. That’d make my life much simpler.”

“Maybe she is, and you’re just struggling with the first step.”

“Hmm.”

“All right, man, it’s cold out here. I’m going in, with or without you.”

“Wait just a sec, brother.”

Jarrod turned, looking at his friend expectantly.

“I’ve been doing some thinking.”

“Uh-oh.”

Sean’s smile was faint. “You might say that, after you hear my suggestion.”

“Only one way to find out. Shoot.”

“Well.” He ran a hand through his hair. Jarrod eyed it, thinking he’d need a haircut before he reported back to duty. “While I was gone you and Kaitlyn developed a rapport.”

Jarrod nodded.

“One that’s better than the one I currently have with her.”

“That will change, in time—”

“Wait, hear me out, please. It’s just that you have a different way of dealing with her than I do. She responds to it. And I just got to thinking, well, if it helps her to have two men looking out for her and helping her stay out of trouble, isn’t that a good thing?”

He furrowed his brow, his mind turning. “I’m not sure I follow.”

“What I’m suggesting is a bit unconventional, I’ll grant you, but I think Kaitlyn does better when she knows she’s got the both of us looking out for her. And when she screws up, sometimes you handle it best, sometimes I do.”

He nodded slowly, trying to see where Sean was going with this.

“So my proposal would be that the two of us join forces to keep her in line.”

Jarrod could feel his cock stirring to life just at the mention of such a plan. But he shook his head despite his obvious desire. “I don’t think I could do that.”

“Why not? Nothing would change. It’d be just like it has been.”

That was exactly why he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t keep putting himself that close to her, and be tempted time after time and unable to do anything about it. However much he might want to help his friend, he wasn’t willing to torture himself in the process.

“You obviously love her.”

Jarrod’s eyes snapped back to Sean’s face. There was no accusation to be found, only a matter-of-factness. “I do care about her. But I would never cross that line, Sean.”

“I know you wouldn’t.” Sean took a step forward and clapped his shoulder. “I know you wouldn’t, buddy, which is why I trust you. And I’m telling you, there is no line. I can see now that Kaitlyn needs
both
of us, in every way possible.”

He felt his mouth go as dry as a cotton ball. In
every
way? Did that mean… but he couldn’t find the words to ask.

“She’s as feisty in the sack as she is out of it,” Sean warned, patting his shoulder once more before he began to walk toward the house.

Jarrod let his breath out in one large
whoosh
. He could have bellowed his excitement to the sky and whoever would listen, but he was still a bit in shock.

“You’re a good friend,” Sean called over his shoulder. “We both want the same things for her.”

That they did. “We should get back inside.”

“I’m right behind you.”

Jarrod walked in, still in disbelief about what had just happened. Disbelief, followed very closely by elation. He kept walking, down the hall, back down the stairs, but he halted right before he got to the living room. He did an about-face and looked Sean right in the eye. “Remember, understand
first
, sergeant. You can hand out knocks later.”

Sean gave him a sharp salute as he wore an ironic smile. “Sir, yes, sir.”

He could see Sean looking ahead of him, searching for her. When he turned to do the same, he was surprised to see Kate sitting up, looking at them. He’d thought for sure that she’d fallen asleep on the couch.

“Jarrod? Is that you?” she asked tentatively.

He looked to Sean, who nodded. “Yeah, Kate.” He stepped forward, making his way into the living room. “It’s me.”

“Did you talk to Sean?”

His heart went out for her for when he heard the anxiety and guilt that filled her voice. “Yes.”

“Does he hate me?”

He turned to look at the shadow he knew Sean was standing in, waiting for his friend to step forward. Jarrod didn’t know what he was waiting for, but he couldn’t leave Kate hanging, not when she was obviously hurting. “No, of course he doesn’t.”

“Are you sure?”

He didn’t know when he’d ever heard her sound more forlorn. “I’m positive. Now stop worrying about it.”

She fell quiet for a minute. When she spoke again, her voice had taken on a little-girl quality that he’d noticed she only got when she was feeling very vulnerable. “Jarrod?”

“Kate?”

“Well, I was wondering… I mean, I was thinking, about what you said… I know I deserve to be punished. Do you think… would you… would you spank me?”

“No,” he said, just as Sean stepped out of the shadows.

“I think I’ll take this one,” he said, and Jarrod nodded. He turned to leave, but Sean’s voice stopped him. “I think you should stay. Just in case I need your help again.”

Chapter Five

Kaitlyn had frozen the moment she’d seen her husband walk into the room. She’d gone as stiff and cold as an ice statue. She wanted to apologize, to throw herself at his feet if necessary, but she couldn’t move.

His eyes were hot on her as he waited for her to say something. “Jarrod, could you get me a chair?” he asked without taking his eyes from her.

She was in a trance, her eyes locked on his. Out of her peripheral vision she saw Jarrod return with a dining room chair, which he placed in the center of the living room.

“Thank you. Kaitlyn?”

She normally bristled when he used her name as a summons, but not this time. Tonight, she knew she deserved whatever punishment he meted out and more. She wished he’d let her explain—that is, if she could find the
words
to explain. She didn’t think she could bear to look at him and think that he hated her. But she’d dug her own grave. There was nothing left to do but stand on her wobbly legs and move toward him. She felt like she was moving at a snail’s pace, but he didn’t comment.

When she got within arm’s reach, she halted. Her stomach was doing somersaults being this close to him and knowing that inevitably she’d end up hot-bottomed and sore.

“Come here, please.”

She took two tentative steps forward and was surprised when, instead of pulling her over his knees, he took her hands instead.

“Look, babe, I know we’re still trying to figure things out and settle back in together, and that’s tough. I know I didn’t handle things the best way today, either. And I want to apologize for that. Also… when I spanked you earlier, I was angry. I never should have laid a hand on you because I was too upset. That’s why I stopped, but it never should have happened, and I’m sorry.”

Kate was surprised and touched by the heartfelt apology. She reached up and cradled his cheek. “It’s OK. I’m sorry, too.”

“Do you forgive me?”

“Of course I do.”

Sean raised her hand a bit and bent his head the rest of the way to kiss the back of her hand. “Thank you. Now as for the rest of it, how do you think we should handle this, babe?”

It was so close to something Jarrod might have said, that she did a double-take, just to make sure it was still Sean talking. But before she could answer, he was already talking again.

“I’ll be spanking you, of course, but I think this transgression requires a little more, don’t you?” Again, he didn’t wait for her to answer before he ordered, “Get the pepper sauce, please.”

Her green eyes widened slightly, and her pulse picked up, but she turned to do as he’d instructed. She reached the kitchen in a matter of seconds, it seemed. Why had they bought a house with the living room and kitchen so close to each other? That must have been Sean’s idea.

Her hand shook slightly as she reached to open the door to the pantry. The pepper sauce wasn’t visible at first glance, but she knew where it was by memory: the same place she’d hidden it when he’d left eighteen months ago. She pushed the bags of rice aside, weaving her hand around the muffin mixes and boxes of spaghetti until her hand closed around it. She shut her eyes and swallowed hard. She knew she wasn’t going to enjoy this one bit.

Still, she pulled the bottle out of the pantry, giving it a baleful look. She vowed every time she encountered it to smash it against the poor, unsuspecting floor, but she never had. Probably because she knew Sean would just make another batch, and she’d wind up handing him the bottle every night at supper for a week, if she was lucky.