Shadow's Dangers (23 page)

“Is it really Tess...”

I couldn't go further. Garreth nodded, guessing my question.

“Just know that everything she did, all the decisions she made, were for your own good.”

Garreth looked so sincere when citing the reasons for Tess’s decision that I could only believe it. In addition, Tess had always done everything in my best interest. I couldn't dwell any longer on this while other more important concerns were coming to my mind. The drawing of the place of my dreams that Annabelle had believed to be one of our father’s, the voice in my dream, that I realized, had to be his, my nightmare about the car accident of my parents... Light dawned in my mind when I remembered the dream I had in September. Tess assured me that everything would be fine, that there was someone--without telling me who--that I could trust. Her warnings about the beast, which was actually two beasts, the green-eyed symbolizing Garreth, and the black-eyed one of which I had to be wary. Along with the appearances and the male presence in the shadows that had briefly attracted me. It was probably Garreth and in this dream, I had tried to flee him while resisting the urge to approach. Behavior that I reproduced in real life when we met, reproducing the pattern of my dream because I had not grasped the hidden meaning of it. Everything gradually took place bit by bit and I didn't know if it was my subconscious that had spoken back at that time or if Tess had managed to send me some sort of message from beyond, even though that seemed crazy. It was really at that very moment that I realized I couldn't deny that all this was true and that I could trust Garreth and Leighton if Tess had faith in them.

I stared at them without seeing them, shaken by what I understood only now. Leighton and Garreth, who were no longer busy cleaning my wounds, were both looking at me in my state of limbo, waiting for a reaction.

“My whole family was aware of the existence of...beings like you, whatever you are,” I explained, reeling as I realized what all the information I had received meant. “Tess, my father, my mother and probably even Annabelle, though I doubt she knows a lot. Tess asked you to erase my memories because I was with my parents when they died. I survived. I don't know how and she wanted me to forget that horrible day and everything that had to do with your world because it's some of your peers who did this and knowing that put me in danger. That’s right, isn't it?”

“You almost got it all right,” Leighton said with a mirthless smile. “Tess had also asked because your father was in the habit of telling stories of our world to you and Annabelle. After what happened to your parents, Tess didn't want you to have any recollection of this or too many memories with your parents, so you wouldn’t be looking to discover the reason for their death or to find the persons responsible and risk putting yourself in danger. In any case, those people were killed on the same day so that they couldn’t communicate to anyone the location of you or the rest of your family.”

The news was hard to absorb. Tess wanted to protect me but, because of that, I had no more  memory with my parents to cling to. Even if I understood, a part of me couldn't help but blame her. I forced myself to drive it out of my mind and tried to sort through all the questions I had yet to ask them.

“I don't understand how my family has learned about your existence.”

“Your parents associated with people of our race for some time,” Garreth replied, a little uncomfortable, as if afraid of what would follow.

“Why?”

“I can't tell you because I don't know the reason myself.”

I guessed he knew something, contrary to what he said, but I didn't linger on this point. I still had a thousand other questions.

“Why did your congeners kill my parents?”

“Because they shouldn't have known about our race and learned much about us, but mostly because they were aware of the ways to kill us. It bothered some people, not because they feared they’d reveal our existence, but because they were afraid they would tell humans about our weaknesses and that the revelation would triggers a “witch hunt.” They were afraid our race would suffer consequent losses or turn off altogether.”

I felt like he wasn't telling me everything.

“It doesn't make sense. I thought humans shouldn't know about you. Why did your people let my family be around them then? Why did they entrust them with the ways to kill your kind? And why did nobody do anything to Tess, when she also had to know, or even Annabelle and me in case we would have known, too? How is it that I am still alive when my parents are no longer?”

“The congeners your parents knew and who revealed all those things to them are long dead and your parents never said anything about them so we've never been able to know how they found themselves tied to our world,” Garreth said, his jaw clenched and again, I felt that he was hiding something from me. “Regarding Tess, she didn't live here at the time the tragedy with your parents took place and she didn't know anything until we came and explained everything to her so her life wasn't in danger. For Annabelle, I think they were misinformed and never knew your parents had two daughters. They thought that there was only one and as you were with them in the car, they didn't look further.”

While Annabelle wasn't the person I cared for the most on Earth, I was still relieved to know that people wanting to hurt me were unaware of her existence and that she was out of danger.

“Wait, you said ‘we’?” I realized with delay.

Garreth’s features hardened even more, if that was possible. I understood that he had no intention of telling me in the first place. Leighton sighed pointedly.

“Garreth and I were there that day. We were somehow the protectors of your family, we have been assigned to you after the discovery of the threat hanging over your heads. But the persons responsible for your parents' death trapped us. We arrived too late to save them, but we were able to save you and get rid of the attackers so that your location wouldn't be revealed to others and so they wouldn’t ever know of Tess’ or Annabelle’s existence, or even our world.”

It was hard to process the news, but not because Garreth had admitted that Leighton and he killed the assailants to keep me safe.

“But...I was four-years-old and you...you’re the same age as me and... It's not possible,” I said, bewildered, feeling silly to babble in this way, but unable to help it.

“Would you have believed it, a few months ago, that we were not human if we had said it to you then? I don't think so. Yet this is the case. As it is true that we aren’t the same age as you, even if physically, it looks like it.”

“Enough!” Garreth exclaimed suddenly and I jumped out of my chair, nearly falling back.

Garreth caught me and pressed me against him to make sure I didn't fall. I held my breath, briefly enjoying being against him before I felt uncomfortable. Especially because of what I had told him the day before in school. I suppressed a grimace, the words spoken back to me with painful clarity. After thanking him, I left him and sat back in my seat. He gave me a boyish grin and I forced myself to look away to set my attention to his sister. It wasn't the time to be distracted.

“I told you that there were limits not to pass, Leighton,” Garreth added on a biting tone, as if the interlude during which he had relented had not occurred.

Their mood changes that occurred in a blink of an eye were destabilizing. But I would have to get used to it, like everything else, including the fact that they were older than they appeared. It was certainly strange but I had this incomprehensible feeling that something in me recognized the truth as new things were revealed to me.

“She has a right to get answers. I won't tell her what we didn't get the right to tell her but...”

“What do you mean we didn't get the right? You follow orders from someone?”

“Yes, we follow orders,” Garreth told me. “I am the leader of our group in Mensen but there, where we come from, there is a
Destae,
a leader.”

“You mean the leader of this place...Verashaillé?”

I was certain the word wasn't pronounced like that, however Leighton and Garreth still understood what I was talking about because their eyes became as round as saucers.

“How do...”

“It was me,” Garreth stated, interrupting his sister before smiling, amused, while watching me. “I’ll have to be careful about what I say in your presence, in the future. You miss nothing.”

I could not help but laugh slightly to the absurdity of what he had said.

“Believe me, I let more things slip than I remember.”

“I doubt it,” he said, his smile still growing. “You’re just not aware that you’re too smart for your own good.”

“When you have finished showing off, Garreth, maybe we can go on?” Leighton intervened, pretending to be exasperated by our little aside, even though I had seen the smile that appeared on her lips for a few seconds.

“Don't be jealous, little sister,” he retorted with a wink. “You know I love you too, even though it's definitely not in the same way.”

Slowly, I realized what he had just said. I wasn't alone because Leighton, let a real smile grow this time. Garreth eventually turned to me and contrary to what I had assumed, I was the only one to be embarrassed. He was perfectly comfortable with what he had inadvertently let out--unless he did so voluntarily, perhaps to lighten the mood, which wouldn't surprise me coming from him. His eyes made me meet the challenge of his statement.

“Uh...where were we again?” I inquired, ducking out shamefully.

Garreth didn't fight his laughter. Leighton rolled her eyes at his reaction. Suddenly, she pulled one of my drawings from my bag and placed it on the table.

“
Vergashae.
This place,” she explained, pointing at the sketch I had dreamed of, with its trees and ground covered with something looking like a thick layer of ice, reflecting the sky shimmering with thousands of dancing colors. “In a way, it's our version of Heaven, but this is not the place mentioned by Garreth. He spoke of where our leader and our community are.”

I nodded thoughtfully. I felt interest grow in me after all their recent confidences. Gradually, instead of scaring me, their world began to intrigue me and I found myself incapable of not wanting to know more, especially when I thought of the fact that my parents had known these people. In a sense, even if it was curiosity speaking foremost, it was as if I could get to know them a little bit and get closer to them through this new world. However, I suspected that they wouldn't tell me too much for the moment to spare me. Anyway, there was one thing about which I wanted more than anything to know the answer and in order to be delivered from the damn pain that tortured me.

“About these...mental barriers... Can you remove them to stop my migraines?” I asked Leighton.

She took a deep breath before exchanging a long look with her brother. Finally, they turned their attention to me. Garreth was tense and Leighton seemed sorry.

“Yes, I can remove them and you won't have nightmares or visions related to it. You will get rid of your migraines because they come from the fact that your mind is struggling against the barriers that I posed. Garreth obviously awakes something strong in your memory, which is understandable since the day of the death of your parents, he was the one who took you out of the car and he's the one you truly saw that day.”

She paused, her eyes boring into mine. I now understood my reaction to Garreth on the first day of school and after that. Somehow, he had awakened in me the most horrible day of my childhood and my confused mind had associated him with the monsters who had deprived me of my parents and had also failed to take away my life, hence my instinctive need to escape when he was close, despite the fact that I was attracted to him. Leighton took my hands in hers and I came out of my procrastination.

“You must know, Deliah, I have only seen a mental barrier be removed once. It’s extremely painful. You have two barriers and they are apparently unstable since the memories still come back to you while others try to reappear, too. Do you really want me to do it?

Constant pain or transient pain, my choice was quickly made. I nodded.

“Okay...” she sighed. “Give me a few minutes. I'll make a phone call and come back.”

She went out. I turned to Garreth, questioning him.

“She wants to be sure about the procedure,” he answered my unspoken question.

I felt my stomach knot at the thought she didn't know what to do to take down these barriers. I didn't want to end up with amnesia or worse. Wanting to be reassuring, Garreth smiled and put his hand on my cheek and touched it tenderly. My pulse accelerated while I was trying to get rid of the influence of his emerald eyes, which expressed so many things that left me anything but indifferent.

“You remember when we disappeared from town for two weeks?” he asked me and I nodded. “Well, it was to go back to our community to seek answers about the psychological barriers that affect you. Leighton never heard about anything like that before and she wanted to learn how to remove them. But it can be tricky and she wanted to make sure she knew how to remove them properly so that nothing happens to you.”

He paused momentarily.

“You don't have to worry. Leighton knows what she’s doing. She's just very cautious because she's afraid to hurt you. She cares a great deal about you, you know.”

His tone and look implied that she wasn't the only one, a fact that I was already aware of.

“I know.”

Hesitantly, I finally put my hand on his. His lips twitched even more and the irrepressible urge to kiss him took me by surprise. But the words I had spoken yesterday after leaving the infirmary still rang in my head and I needed to rectify this before moving forward.

“You know, about yesterday...” I began, uncomfortable.

“No need to explain or apologize. I know you didn't mean it. Your eyes at this moment are enough to deny what you said yesterday. And if you didn’t care about me, as you pretended, you wouldn't have deserted the school after that.”

Even if it was true, he looked so sure of himself that I couldn't help but retort something.